“This is…amazing,” said Twilight. The two of us had stayed up all night talking. She’d filled a notebook in the past few hours. Her eyes were red and strained, but she was still writing. “So the system of checks and balances is designed to keep any branch of the government from obtaining too much power?”
“That’s right. Congress writes the laws, the President approves them, and the Supreme Court decides whether they are good ones.” I grinned. "Join us, Twilight. We have elections."
“I admit I was wrong about you. This is far too complicated to be some crackpot idea that you came up with. So has this government been effective in other places?”
“Yes, American-style democracy has managed to spread to several other countries. It has an enemy, though.” I lowered my voice. “Communism.”
Twilight leaned forward, “Is that bad?”
I didn’t get the chance to tell her, though, because the Cutie Mark Crusaders came in. I noticed that Scootaloo had finally gotten her bandages off.
“Twilight, how did you get your cutie mark?”
Taken away from our conversation, she began to tell the story. I listened, too. I still needed all the information I could get about her.
Twilight had wanted to do magic from a young age. It turned out that she was good enough at it that Celestia took her as a student in a special school, like some kind of evil ponified Professor X.
“What about you, Valiant?” asked Sweetie Belle.
“I’m afraid that it’s a rather short story. I woke up one day in Equestria with no idea how I got here. I already had the mark.”
The three of them looked confused. “Ah know you told me that already,” said Apple Bloom. She’d asked me about it a while back. “But you never found out more about it?”
“Well, I can tell you what it is, but not how it signifies my special talent.” I pointed to my hip. “This is the advertising symbol of a product called Plymouth made by the Chrysler Corporation, a long-dead company from Detroit.”
“What’s that?” asked Scootaloo.
“Where’s that?” added Sweetie Belle.
“I think that’s enough questions for today.”
Unperturbed, the Crusaders announced, “We’re going to go ask Rainbow Dash how she got her cutie mark!” They left.
“Where were we?” asked Twilight. “Oh right, United States government.” She sighed. “As interesting as all this is, I only see two possibilities. One, you’re a genius political thinker, if a bit crazy. Two, you really are from ‘America’ but are still a bit crazy.”
“No possibility that you’re a figment of my imagination?”
“Think about it from my perspective. What if somepony was telling you that you didn’t really exist. You wouldn’t agree, because you’ve got all these thoughts and emotions of your own.”
I nodded. “Okay, fair point. I just need to take charge of my subconscious and start bending this dream to my will.”
“Um, well, if you want to sit in the corner and try to alter the universe with your mind, I guess I won’t stop you.”
“Thanks.” I sat down and tried to force Twilight out of existence. It didn’t work. Clearly I wasn’t thinking hard enough. It would probably be easier if I had something symbolic to focus on, like a unicorn horn. I tried to grow one. No dice.
Twilight was still sitting there when I opened my eyes. She almost looked smug. “No luck?”
I stood up and walked to the door. I still thought that with enough effort, I could alter my subconscious and take charge of things, but now I was a little more cautious. I admit that doubt had begun to creep in.
Twilight Smuggle didn’t try to stop me from leaving. I needed something to distract myself. The newest robot needed only a little more work before it was ready to go. I hoped I had calculated the airship size correctly and it would actually lift me, armor and all. Orbital Drop Shock Pony, coming right up.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders came clanking up in their robot. It was covered in dirt and had a few branches hanging out of the machinery. It looked like they had been crusading for cutie marks again.
“Rainbow’s story about going fast was boring,” said Sweetie Belle. “I mean, we’ve already seen a sonic rainboom.”
“I thought it was pretty cool,” said Scootaloo.
“We want to help you find out what your cutie mark means!” Apple Bloom told me.
“Well, I don’t know if I have time,” I said.
“Come on! We can help you finish up your work and then we can get started.”
“All right, I’ll need some tools.”
They helped me get the exoskeletal armor working. I had decided to simply call it EXAR. It was nearly form-fitting, and ran on batteries. It had limitations, but it was light enough to carry even if the power was dead. I wasn’t going to leave a robot behind ever again.
After the powerpacks were charged from the base station, the Crusaders went with me over to Rarity’s shop. Between the two robots, it was easy to carry the yards and yards of heavy airship material back to the library.
I didn’t trust the three fillies with fire, which was exactly why I trusted them with hydrogen. I knew they couldn’t set off an explosion. Still, I was nervous as we filled the airship.
I figured that it was full enough when we had to strain to hold it down. I had yet to install the air compressor that would be used to vary the gas density.
With the installation of the hanging basket, it began to look like an airship. Steampunky, but effective. It was just a few weapons short of being awesome.
We broke for lunch, and I agreed to tell the Crusaders my story. They interrupted with questions more than once, but I got through it.
Rarity poked her head in the window. “Photo Finish is looking for you. I thought I could give you a warning.”
“Thanks, Rarity. Girls, do you think you could distract her? She’s trying to take my picture.”
The Crusaders agreed to help. The only time I caught a glimpse of the photographer that day was when she was being chased out of town by a robot.
The free time away from the crusaders gave me an opportunity to go back to work on the airship. I had decided to reserve the rockets for emergency power and pursue an internal combustion engine. It would require a redesign, but at least the fuel would be cheap. Oil was not in demand on the Equestrian stock exchange, and with some careful agreements I was on my way to cornering the market. All it would take was time and just a few more bits invested.
They say you have to have money to make money, and I didn’t. If it weren’t for the charity of the ponies, I would have been completely broke. I figured I could pay them back someday. First I had to make smart investments.
Rusty Nail at the hardware store was able to get me a basic piston-type pump. I honestly don’t know how ponies had steam power and mechanical pumps, but not internal combustion engines. Oh well, it wouldn’t be too terribly difficult to convert.
“You’ve been my best customer. Can I tell you a secret?” he asked.
“Sure.”
“Sometimes when I’m alone I like to dress up like Sapphire Shores and whip myself like a little filly.”
“I wish I’d said that you couldn’t tell me a secret, but I guess it’s too late for that.”
“Here, take this pump. No charge.”
I guess that made it worth the unpleasant mental images.
A few days passed, and the small engine was almost ready. I’d had to figure out a way to get a fuel inside and combust it. There would have to be some changes to the airship in order to compensate for the weight, but it was manageable.
Rarity came over with a new copy of some fashion magazine. I was somewhat surprised to see the Cutie Mark Crusaders on the cover. Magnificient machines! was splashed across the title bar.
“I hope you realize what this means,” said Rarity. “You are now fashionable.”
I facehoofed. “What should I do?”
“Well, you can either become a recluse or you can become a public figure. I’ll be your agent.”
“I think I’ll take the first option. I like being the only pony with a robot.”
“There will probably be other ponies making knockoffs.”
I grinned. “I wonder if the girls would be interested in Cutie Mark Crusader Copyright Enforcement?”
319619
I am SO using that in the next chapter.
wow this story just got about 20 percent cooler
At first I thought this story was a bit dull because it stuck so closely to the original story line, but every chapter is getting better and better.
Now this is a fic I adamantly look forward to reading.
MORE CHAPTERS. NOW. Please?
copyright: now protected through the use of GIANT FRIKEN ROBOTS!
Another awesome chapter! Hehe. Keep it up!!!
i thought CAPITALISM was the enemy of communism
and that DICTATORSHIP was the enemy of democracy
o_o you now good.
I love this. It's extremely funny and unique, bout' time somepony wrote something that isn't cliche and creepy.
Okay, that last line convinced me. Favorited
Here, have a moustache
I see what you did there.
I literary sat there for a few seconds just starring at that....W-w-what? Why?
Communism looks good on paper but is terrible in practice. Corruption and laziness abound.
i.qkme.me/3qfmr6.jpg
cdn.meme.li/i/pasmw.jpg
2136866 Isn't the same thing sort of true for capitalism?
1452332 FINALLY!!!!!!! Someone who doesn't just say "Communism is bad". You ask them why, "Duh, I dunno. It's just bad." is all you get. People wonder why stock prices are rising, why gas costs 3.50 a gallon, and why Curious George is in the White House. Disgrace on our nation. Argue with me. I DARE YOU.
I always find it funny when people demonise Communism as the enemy of Democracy. Its actually the other way around. Communism is (on paper) an evolved form of democracy, a utopia if you want. There is only one big issue, in order for it to work the entire population needs to have an average schooling of doctorates. It is also just as prone to corruption as is capitalism.
2136866 I think we can agree on this.
1452332 3994794 I love you guys.
3994794 K. Your are wrong.
Dropping feet first into hell.
I read this and was like: "Cutie Mark Crusaders Paparazzi Control!"
Then I read
Clever girl!
"But not you colts and fillies! How will you go?"
"Feet first sir!"
>>>“That’s right. Congress writes the laws, the President approves them, and the Supreme Court decides whether they are good ones.” I grinned. "Join us, Twilight. We have elections.">>>
Ahem: Under Obama: Congress does nothing as both hyper-polarized parties try to out-stab each other, the President enforces only what he feels like and arbitrarily changes laws whenever he feels like and no one has the guts to tell him he can't constitutionally do that or they'll be labelled a racist, and the Supreme Court seems to be sashaying wildly, making decisions which seem to contradict other decisions they made not long before...
So, yeah, Benevolent Dictator Celestia is best.
>>>I honestly don’t know how ponies had steam power and mechanical pumps, but not internal combustion engines. >>>
You don't know much about the history of the Industrial Revelution, do you?
The internal combustion engine wasn't perfected until almost the end of the 19th century. Meanwhile, steam trains had been around for half a century and mechanical pumps had actually been invented during the Roman Empire.
Chapter 23: Rocketry?
He's going to try to build a liquid-fueled rocket with sub-20th century technology....
Heh heh, well, at least when it explodes violently he'll find out this isn't a dream when he's missing several limbs and internal organs from the blast.
And dies.
4284889 Hey, maybe he'll decide that the only way to wake up is to die. And then he finds out the hard way.
4284889
4290496
Ha! Damn straight! That's exactly what he needs!
Actually, there's no reason communism can't work with democracy. That's how it's supposed to work. The USSR and North Korea operated (and NK still does) on involuntary state socialism. NK is actually a dynastic system. Horribly tyrannical, but communism? No, that can work with democracy. Why, the education system in America is socialist. Finland's is even more so, and works better. But state socialist systems, where the government dictates the majority of education, turn authoritarian quite quickly.
Cutie Mark Crusaders Copyright Enforcement?
I like this
...Oh, it's more complicated than that! Don't forget that Congress is made up of two parts, the House and the Senate... And that every state of the US has a duplicate of the entire system, with an executive branch headed by a governor in place of the president...
Should I tell you about the electoral college..? <Hail Celestia!)
6537839
He's just being a meme, communism is a form of collected economy, it just so happens all the Communist States were run by a very centralised self-elected party or outright dictatorship
Democracy isn't invulnerable to the same fault, look at the state of the elections in the middle East, and Asia where the candidates have to be approved by the existing government and who can even vote is often sharply curtailed, it's not better than the Communist States that existed 30 years earlier
7149693
I'm going to have to use this phrase someplace.
Dude, some of these secrets...
Oh god no. We're going to have three little youtubes walking around.
it would be hilarious if he became a unicorn by meditating AKA rising to a higher spiritual state.
Unicorn Master race.
Are you sure about that?
Oh, dear.
7509710
Oh, yes.
Titanfall bois
9780957
Awww BT...
I'm sad now, sad and off to play Titanfall 2 again.
That was a secret I neither expected nor ever needed to hear.
Bruh
"I want to kill you"
"OK. Take my money"