They say revenge is a dish best served cold. I used to wonder, how cold should it be? Well, I know now. The sort of cold that comes from eternal night and being locked in stone for over a thousand years. The sort that comes from the only person you think you can trust betraying you.

The sort of cold that comes from a knife in the back.

The Moon betrayed me. The Sun entombed me alive. And they were going to pay.

For the League of Humans Acting Villainous

Being the Royal Advisor for Celestia and Luna, you've come up with solutions for many of the nation's problems.

Unfortunately you said a naughty word in front of a guard. Seeing as how these ponies are extremely sensitive, you lie your way out of it.

The events that follow could only be described as "completely stupid".

Rated Teen for naughty words being said.

Thanks to Zephyr for editing.

Featured within 1 hour and 30 minutes on Aug 12, 2015. Thank you guys so much!

Good thing I was reading this on the toilet, because this story made me lose my shit. -LeoneHaxor

One year has almost passed since a mysterious entity invaded Anon's mind and forced him to turn against his friends and terrorize the ponies of Ponyville. Though he was eventually freed from it's influence, Anon's attempts to return to his life in Ponyville have thus far failed.
Because even though he was said to be forgiven, no one can forget the fear and dread they felt during that time, least of all Anon himself.
Tormented by nightmares of his actions and the silent condemnations of the ponies around him, Anon is feeling his life spiraling out of control again, driven to shut himself off from the world as he is haunted by deeds that were not his own.
Now, his former friends must look inside of themselves and see if they can find it in their hearts to truly forgive and forget and if the bonds of friendship can be reforged... Before Anon is lost forever.

[03-02-2015] Holy crap! Featured!

This is an unofficial sequel to Hurt by Brainhorn. (Warning! Do not read if you are disturbed by graphic depictions of rape.)
PLEASE NOTE that this story does not contain any scenes of rape or sexual nature, but they will be referenced and hinted at. (Also, spoilers for "Hurt" if you plan on reading it first.)

Also, though the main characters name is Anon, this is not like most Anon in Equestria-stories. It is not written in a 2nd-person perspective but the main character instead has a personality of his own, and though I've left much of his appearance vague, he is not the green faceless man he's usually depicted as. The only real reason he is even named Anon is because that was his name in "Hurt", and it would feel wrong to change that into something else. I say this as a heads-up to both those who like or dislike AiE-stories.

Cover art is made by TetraPony. It's mostly a placeholder until I can get something more fitting.

You've been in Equestria for just under half a year now, and the fabled land of friendship has been wonderful. But to you, the best part is without a doubt spending time with Equestria's moon goddess, Luna.

A story of Luna with you starring as Anonymous
(Rating will be subject to change later)

An astronaut finds himself in the Astral Plane after his ship's reactor melts down. Many people think horoscopes are a joke, but this astronaut finds out just how real they are.

This is an Anonymous in Equestria story. If you have a problem with stories being in second person and the main character being called Anonymous, please, by all means, leave now.

Three alicorns are tired of their subjects and their constant whining and complains. So one fateful day, they make a silly wish. But the wish came true...
___
One human, a lonely guy with the name, Anon, who does not have a job, friends or a family, is riding his big RV in North-Norway. Every day is the same; driving, fueling, eating, driving.
Until one day everything changes.

Featured for over 4 days!!!

(-Just a heads up. i suck with grammars and stuff, so expect some changes and corrections in the future. Also please point out my mistakes if you would. Thanks. Now let the games begin!)

-(cover art goes to the guy who made it!)-

Denny's. A greasy hive of bacon and eggs. Stephen is working the graveyard shift, slowly letting the minutes tick by, when he gets an unusual visitor...

A little story I had the idea of most likely in the shower. Based on my seeing THIS image late at night. Because staying up to 2:30 in the morning was a good idea.

Featured 10 Feb 2015! Y'all are weird, but I like you.

By the way, I don't own Denny's logo, menu items, etc. etc. please don't sue.

King Sombra’s dark influence was obliterated by the Crystal Heart, and the villain is well and truly dead. But when he attempts to steal the afterlife of an innocent victim, a human spirit is left hurtling towards Equestria, where this unfortunate soul is revived into the only vessel available: the reconstituted body of King Sombra himself.

Thus, a cheerfully oblivious alien is crammed into the form of the most evil and malicious being Equestria has ever known. Not that Shining Armor and Cadence know this, of course. As far as they are concerned, the King is back and he’s lost his fricking mind.

Click here for the TV Tropes page!

Don't write on two hours of sleep, trust me.

A story with an Anon and the methods he takes to dissuade the Princesses from asking him so many questions about his home and culture. Lacking the basic courtesy of a pony and definitely disregarding their pride in magic, this human drops to lows that are usually seen only in the most disgusting of humans.

Enjoy or not, I had fun writing this and it's more for my sanity than anything.
PS- No actual sex is in this story so calm yourselves.

Professional Reviews

"drunk/10 not bad" –NuclearWaffles21

"I'm seriously rock hard right now." –Rebel

"yeah the 3 children in my basement won't shut the fuck up" –Winter the Gimp

"This is both extremely stupid, and written in such a way that I expect your non-trolly-stories to not be extremely stupid." –bobbananaville

"I don't remember how I found this story, but it was weird, and I liked it." –Narlepoax III

”I like story! Is very good! Now you go to Gulag!” –Joseph Stalin

"Ponykind must have run out of colours when they finally got to this pony. Everything from his mane to his ass was all seven colours of gloom and doom. He was so dark and brooding he probably ate glittery emos and shat vampire bats.” - Quote of the Week

1000 years the ponies have prayed for a saviour to deliver them, whether it was their long lost sun goddess Celestia, or even Nightmare Moon, maybe even the chaos lord Discord, anypony! After suffering under the yoke of a tyrant god for so long, they decided any saviour will do, even a dark demonic overlord. One unicorn sorceress finally decides to take matters into her own hooves. She sets out to the frozen ruins of a long lost Empire in the Crystal Mountains bearing a grand sacrifice of 1000 ponies in an attempt to summon the dark demonic overlord of the Crystal Empire.

When the dark ritual turned up a blank, the universe decides to shuffle in the next best thing. Will he rise up to the expectations of his newfound flock? He'd better, and quickly, for the tyrant god's inquisition is out to get him and the 1000 'blasphemers' involved in his summoning. With a nation to build and an evil tyrant god to fight, never has there been a taller order to fill. But it's alright, he's a dark demonic overlord, right? He quickly finds that with some smokes and mirrors and the help of 1000 very magical ponies, anyone can look the part, even an entirely magic-inert pizza delivery dude.

Now a long-haul fic! Many thanks to everyone who convinced me to make this a reality!

Many many thanks to the Editing team, Dumbgamer99, Not A Hat, and Brad The Brony. Be sure to thank them by checking out their pages!

Our lovable number one overdude assistant, Crystal Heart, now has a musical theme, aptly titled 'Dual Core A.I.', kindly provided by AdmiralTigerclaw! Epic now comes in an entirely new flavour! Many thanks!

Somebody kindly messaged me and told me I should announce here that the story was featured from 27 - 30th of April. I completely missed that but many thanks for making that possible, everyone!

Cover Art: Placeholder drawn by me. Will be a background for a full cover at some point.