I used to be a human, but then I pissed off a wizard. Now I'm stuck in "Ponyville", in a land called "Equestria", and with no apparent way back home. I'm also pretty sure that I've just replaced somepony. I'd rather not have to answer any tricky questions, so I'm better off trying to be this unicorn whose name has been forced onto me.

My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I'm not a pony.

[Rated Teen for extensive use of vulgar language and sexual references.]

[Cover art made by richhap on deviant art. Unamused Twilight, go figure.]

[Brybrythesciguy is working on a cool audiobook of this story right HERE. The characters' voices are even simulated with an AI! I definitely recommend giving it a listen!]

TV TROPES PAGE! Show it the love, people!

Tartarus: the fabled prison said to hold all of the demons of Equus at bay.

Few truly know what lies behind the impenetrable doors Cerberus guards. Some say that it is a pit, infinite in it's depth and darkness, from which there is no return. Other claim it to be a hellish plain, filled with fire and pain and suffering, to punish the demons for their sins.

All of them are wrong.

Tartarus is small. An inescapable cell for a single prisoner. But the tales about it's purpose are not false.

For this captive human holds the key to unleashing upon Equestria forces which have not been seen for centuries, forces which predate Equestria by many an age.

And soon, he shall be free.

EDIT: Featured on 5/25/14! SUH-WEEEEET!

[img]http://i.imgur.com/6MrWqNZ.png[/img]

He was an average man in nearly every sense of the term, but his entire life is flipped upside-down when a push for a paycheck turns into something unexpected...something much more. Marooned on an alien world with no known way home, how will he survive a potentially-hostile environment? Afraid, ignorant, and alone, he will be forced to adapt and survive, or seek out help.

Rated T for strong language, use of alcohol, violence, and suggestive situations.

A/N: Yes, there is romance in this story. No, I'm not referring to one-sided romances. Instead, most of the story is going to show the developing relationships between Jamie and those close to him, and you'll join him as he slowly and painstakingly overcomes a lifetime of human culture and morals.

Featured 09/18/2014! Holy horseapples, batmare!

Featured 06/13/2016! Thanks guys and gals!