Today was a shaping up to be a bad day, Apple Bloom had been running for her life in the Everfree forest. Now she didn't even know if she was even in the same forest anymore. She had never before seen trees so tall, and never before had she met something so strange.

Something ancient.
Something overflowing with old and powerful magic.
Something green.

You love to cuddle mares. Mares love to cuddle you. One batpony mare named Stella REALLY wants to cuddle with you. This is in no way negotiable and your night may or may not be ruined.

Base artwork by Ligerstorm, sourced to his DA.

FANTASTIC reading done by StraightToThePointStudio (Thanks again!): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ojuquk9Md0

A group of pony radicals try to summon a demon to overthrow the princesses. Instead they got a human. They don't know what a human is.

((Pre Princess Twilight))

((Edit: Featured 5/11/2020. Didn't expect this to go over so well!))
((Edit2: Ch.8 featured 10/1/2020))
((Edit3: Featured 10/22/2020))
((Final Edit: Featured 3/25/2021))

Anon is a villain. Not a particularly good one, but... he’s a villain. Let’s see what stupid shit he did this time.

A one-shot inspired by “If movie Villains didn’t waste time”

Anon feels like bonding with the pony personification of the sun; Princess Celestia. More specifically, he feels like sexually bonding with her.

Princess Luna doesn’t know how to feel about that.

WARNING: Profanity, and I mean a ridiculous amount of profanity. Also sex jokes, because bottom of the barrel humour has been fermenting the longest.

Eric, easygoing local human, is winding down for the night when he receives an unexpected visitor.

He is a good host to them.

This story is a sequel to Friendship Is Cynical

The cynical bastard, formerly known as Ryan Curtis, was no more. That person had died and been left to rot, leaving someone else in his place.
Rusty Nails, a human that finally broke free of his past, has found happiness over the years and is ready to start enjoying life. However, the mistakes of his former self have started to haunt him. Even while assuming a new identity, the memories of who he was before would occasionally resurface, plaguing his mind and tormenting him mercilessly.
After all this time of adventuring and discovering the man hidden beneath the monster, he is finally ready to return to his old home and make amends for all of the wrongs that his former self had committed. Unknown to him; There's more than just a few hurt feelings to make up for.

FEATURED: 9/9/18
FEATURED AGAIN: 12/15/18
FUUUUUUUUUU: 2/5/19
I HAVE ASCENDED: 4/28/19
BARELY SOBER ENOUGH TO REGISTER: 11/1/19
I'M JUST GONNA STOP NOW: 1/21/20
I LIED!!!: 12/12/20

Caramel decides to take Anon out drinking. It doesn't quite work out. A bittersweet look at a more grounded RGRE.
(RGRE)
{This story has two versions, the last chapter is the first person version.}

Throughout his time in Equestria, Anon has seen a great many things - that being said, he's in for a first. The strange behemoth is as beautiful as she is baffling, leaving the man in a bit of a pickle. What does one do when faced with a literal giant of a pony?

Artwork by AnonTheAnon (Twitter @RealAnonTheAnon)
Big shout-out to MiddyNight (Twitter @Middynight_) for help with the Scottish accent for her!

If you want to help support me, I have a Tip-Jar/Patreon HERE

The human known as Anon is sick and tired of the rules of the universe—at least the one he’s found himself in at the moment. So he decides to pick a fight with the pony equivalent of Jesus.

Nothing good ensues.