Fic reviews, July 19th: Imposing Sovereigns II edition! · 1:12pm Jul 19th, 2020
SPark is selling a bigass Cadence plushie!
wew, lads c.c; This was a humdinger. And yet? Not more than I could take, thanks to my new method of reading just a little bit every day. :) That being said, I'm probably going to move away from events and contests (for all that I have a couple more scheduled as the next few extra review editions), just because they take so damn long to finish. I'd rather go for smaller, themed reviews just so I don't have to sit on them for so much time.
Like, I already actually read and reviewed Souls and Silicon by Syke Jr. Should've been in this one, not sure how I missed that it was from the contest. The first review of this blog was written sometime last year, closer to when the contest ended, because it got into the RCL. And it took me so long to get through these that (at least) three of them have been unpublished. So that's overall not a great state of affairs. I want to post more frequently, because it's not about quantity.
I mean, it is, but it's also stopped mattering for a long time now. <.<
H: 13 R: 15 C: 15 V: 2 N: 3
She Kills Monsters by Chiko
Genre: Sad EQG
Looking for closure, Rarity plays a game of Ogres & Oubliettes with her sister's friends.
Starting out the gate, we're really stretching the definition of "sovereign", but at the same time, I can't recall the last time I heard so much hype for a story. It's well-earned. This is inspired by a play of the same name, also about a woman trying to reconnect with her dead sister via a D&D module. It's quite a bizarre set up, but it nevertheless allows for some really deep exploration of grief and sisterhood. The strict 500-word chapters make for some extremely tight writing; as someone in the comments pointed out, they rarely feel like 500 words because there's so much packed in. The characters are all excellent, with the possible exception of Rarity's parents, whose role in the story rather put me off; then again, we've only seen them once, in Equestria, so who knows? Basically, whatever you've heard about this story, it's all true, and this is absolutely worth your time. Setting the bar high for this one!
Highly Recommended
Waning Crescent by iisaw
Sequel to Waxing Gibbous
Genre: Post-Apocalypse AU
In my review of Waxing Gibbous, I lamented that its ending felt like blatant sequel bait. Thankfully, there's a blatant sequel to be had! Though by the time you read this review, the story will have been taken down; ironically, so have the details. Anyway, I'm not sure I understood two words of this (aside from the excellent twist in the middle), but this was still really cool. The prose is high-flung, the imagery compelling and original, and all the capitalized words lend power and importance to names of things I could not otherwise grasp. This is only barely related to the previous story and stands on its own, and having no idea what the crossover was, I was able to take the goings-on as simply whispers of the unknowable. This was cool, but now it's gone. :(
Recommended
Inward Eyes Wide Open by Thought Prism
Genre: Character Piece
Chancellor Neighsay has some things to think about.
This is an interesting little tidbit that goes into the whys of Neighsay being so ponies-first. There's some notable events he was caught up in involving non-ponies which distinctly colored his vision, and thinking about them now gets him pondering what I'm pondering other things. And this dovetails neatly with DannyJ's recent insanely long review of season eight, specifically of turning Neighsay into a 'straw racist', and made me think of something, too. Doing that with his character kind of teaches us that one act of kindness will turn around the mindset of someone like Neighsay, when that almost assuredly will not work in real life. This story at least has him realize where the blind spots are, and though he doesn't do anything about them, someone else being able to might start turning things around. Anyway, this is short but it got me thinking about stuff, so that's good. :)
Recommended
PRINCE GALLUS? And the Trial for the Throne by Hopeful_Ink_Hoof
Genre: Adventure
Princess Twilight Sparkle has an idea that Gallus might just be griffon royalty, which is merely the start of his problems.
This is a fairly simple story, considering its scope and length. The titular trial, for instance, just involves going into a cave and finding a scepter; I kept expecting the incidental things that happened to be part of the trial, but they weren't, leaving the whole thing seeming less than daunting. The writing is fairly plain; maybe this could have been more without a word count? What this does do well is peek inside the head of an older Gallus, after the end of the show. Anyone wanting to see him get something good in his life for once will probably appreciate what this does for him.
Recommended for Gallus Fans
Silverstream's Raiding Party by Hopeful_Ink_Hoof
Genre: Dark AU Action
Silverstream leads a midnight raid on one of the Storm King's ships.
Wait, the same author twice in a row? O.o What kind of contest is this? Anyway, like the previous story, this takes a deep dive into a future version of one of the Student Six, and I gotta say: a broken, badass Silverstream who's learned to bury the hurt she experiences when killing other creatures? Something I can totally get behind. This is the kind of story that's more a scene in a much larger story, but it's still got some good swashbuckling action. I wouldn't mind seeing the next part or three. :)
Recommended
Phoenix-born Rising- The Ascension of Sunset Shimmer [1st ed.] by The Voice in the Water
Genre: EQG AU
Sunset just wanted to watch the new phoenix be born. She never expected she would be chosen as its lifelong bonded partner.
Up front, the one downside to this story is that title. Capitalization is an issue, and the "1st ed." thing is confusing. Until you look at the author's other works and realize, this is literally just a test run for the story, and they're writing the whole thing over again, long form. I for one am extremely excited about this, because this piece was excellent. The author not only crafted a solid AU for the EQG setting — EQG because they all have pony-colored skin — reminiscent of the Oversaturated World, but high fantasy instead of urban. What makes it work so darn well is the author didn't waste time telling us every little detail about it. I mean, what's a forging dance? We get to see one, but how does it work? I couldn't tell you, I was too focused on the story! :D Incredible. Said story involves a young girl rising above her station, and weathering the slings and arrows thrown at her by those who don't think she deserves to. It goes through its own broad strokes in just enough form to make the ending incredibly satisfying. Also, Queen Celestia is a centaur for some reason, and that's awesome. I can't wait for the full thing to be finished.
Highly Recommended
I Vow to Thee, My Country by Undome Tinwe
Genre: Shipping/Drama
How do you profess your love for the most beloved pony in Equestria?
Rarelestia, huh? This doesn't do much to sell the ship, save that Rarity is a good choice for exploring the wedding vows question at the center of the piece. There's no much to this aside from figuring out how to best express a grand gesture of true love, but I will say Twilight was remarkable in the first scene.
Recommended for Shippers
Memento Morient by FanOfMostEverything
Genre: Immortality Angst
Just when Twilight has a gap in her schedule is of course when Discord would decide to show up and talk about something grave.
This surprised me. We've all read stories about Discord angsting over Fluttershy's mortality, but usually when Twilight's on the cover, she's the one doing the unhappy tappy, not handing out calm, rational advice. So as immortality angst stories go, this is pretty good, and comes with extremely good characterization to boot. That said, it gets really explainy toward the end, trying to fit in every last little bit of post-S9 headcanon possible. The characters even comment on how they've digressed from the subject at least once! So while good, it's meandering.
Recommended If You Like Headcanon-Centric Stories
One Night's Rest by Jhoira
Genre: Dark/Drama
King Sombra is called from his eternal punishment… to the Crystal Empire?
When the author admits they need to go back over a story, but it's been four months and it still looks like this, the only thing to do is take it as it is. And what it is is, sadly, a bit of a mess. The writing is distractingly unedited, and I found myself skimming a lot because of it. But I also don't think the story works at its core. It seems to be giving Sombra a new backstory, fairly dark, which justifies his bleak view of the world. What it doesn't justify is his eleventh-hour change of heart, nor Twilight being attacked immediately after dismissing her guards, in the same chapter no less. If the intention was to redeem Sombra, this did not succeed.
Not Recommended
Lest We Forget by I Thought I Was Toast
Genre: Emotional
After their queen fell, the ponies of the night never forgot her.
OH BOY THE T WORD RIGHT THERE IN THE DESCRIPTION. Ignoring that glaring mistake, this is pretty good. The batponies are painted as eternal watchdogs of the night, and Luna's return does nothing to upend their vigil. It's really quite unique. There's even a scene toward the end that you'd call cute, despite the perfect crimson woe of everything else, to borrow a phrase.
Recommended
Afternoon Tea and Games by BoredAuthor817
Genre: Chessfic
Sunset meets Princess Celestia for… Sigh. Tea and chess.
I once wrote a story making fun of fics like this, ya know? But the tired setup of tea and chess is not why I didn't like this. That's just why it's dull. I didn't like this because it undoes all of Sunset's characterization, and makes Celestia an evil schemer on top of it. I don't want to listen to a vague conversation between the two of them sprinkled with utilitarian pap about spilling blood. And it's a shame, because eventually something does happen, and there's a lot of talk of various major characters being clones, but I just really did not care one bit. If the writing hadn't been riddled with word misuse and other simple errors, this might have held some merit, but either way, it's not a story I want to read.
Not Recommended
Worshiping at the Altar of Knowledge by TCC56
Genre: Comedy
Twilight investigates an evil cult and learns more than she bargained for.
This is real funny. :D It gets maybe a little dark and serious in the middle — the author apparently intended to write something more philosophical in nature — but that's also arguably the funniest chapter. Just know that going into this, you will have a good time.
Recommended
What It Means to Rule by Boltstrike58
Genre: Headcanon Dump
Flurry Heart wonders why the crystal ponies celebrate the downfall of King Sombra. Aren't rulers supposed to be good?
I really liked the idea behind this story, both because Flurry Heart is a character of infinite potential and because the central question sets the idea of evil kings contrary to her understanding of the world. Unfortunately, the execution isn't great, specifically the dialogue. The middle third of this, at least, is just Twilight rattling off Sombra's entire backstory (sidenote, she has no idea how to talk to children). Block after block of dry text goes by, the details of which aren't anything too surprising. I wish this had focused more on Flurry's reactions, because those were good, not to mention what I wanted to see. We'll be getting tons of Sombra backstories in this contest, I'm sure.
Vaguely Recommended
Royal Flowers by TCC56
Genre: EQG Shipping Comedy
Sunset brings Wallflower through the portal to meet the princesses and receives a surprise.
Wow, it's like Sunset Shipping all over again! :D This is a short piece that gives away its big joke in the description, yet somehow manages to be hilarious nevertheless. Beyond that, well, it's got some good "orphaned Sunset sees Celestia as more than just a mentor" headcanon, which I like. Ends on something of a sequel hook? Like, it sounds like the end of a chapter, but this is a one-shot. Oh well, still fun.
Recommended
Even a Victorious Battle Is a Terrible Thing by SockPuppet
Genre: Sad/Drama
How interested are you in reading a story about the Crystal Empire mourning 190 dead soldiers? You can't ask for a story that better does that idea justice, full of military ceremony and so forth, but oof. The surprising thing is, from the start it's easy to guess who's among the dead; the real tear-jerker is who survived. I can't think of much else to say.
Recommended
To Be Kind by brokenimage321
Genre: Philosophical/AU
What happens when the Princess of Kindness runs out of kindness?
Usually when I use the 'philosophical' tag, it's something of a condemnation, but here's how you do it well. It's not just two characters sitting down to talk about whatever the author wants to get off their chest or prove their mental superiority about. This asks a question, gives us a scenario, and then lets the answer hang. Along the way, we get an interesting AU where Fluttershy's reformation of Discord is proven to be more princess-worthy than whatever nonsense Twilight did at the end of that season, a sentiment I really like. We get a few scenes from later episodes where it's Fluttershy, not Twilight, who is the princess, and quite a bit changes because of that. And then we get the final problem, the one that kindness can't easily solve. It's pretty cool stuff.
Recommended
Season by Equimorto
Genre: Dark Comedy
Any day now, the Storm King's loyal troops will find him and restore him to power.
A funny story about one's defeat fits the Storm King perfectly, and yet? Kinda makes me feel bad for the guy. I mean, we're getting a front-row seat to his eternal torment, essentially. And yet his ego holds out, which is why this deserves the comedy tag at all. It could have leaned a bit harder on that to take the edge off, but if nothing else, I'm impressed at how succinct it is.
Recommended for Fans of Dark Comedy
The Heart Beats Still by ArgonMatrix
Genre: Historical/Drama
Princess Amore will defend her Empire from the umbrum even if it takes everything she has.
This is something of a treatise on the pros and cons of being a hands-on ruler. It's honestly painful at times watching Amore try to be everything for everyone, even when there are so many voices close to her saying, it's okay, please just rest. It can also be taken as a meditation on just how bad an idea the Crystal Heart is as a means of defense. <.< I will say, I have only the vaguest recollection of the comics issues that gave us Amore and the umbrum, but getting into this wasn't too hard. There's a princess, she's fighting shadow monsters, they've figured out a new way to torment her subjects. Lots of action and some heartbreak, so all together, it's a good time.
Recommended
Miles to Go by AugieDog
Genre: Slice of Life
With his daughter taking over his business, Filthy Rich just needs to decide what to do with his retirement.
I love how liberal this contest is with the concept of "ruler". I mean, I'll take stories about Filthy Rich any day of the week. This one's set probably during the series finale, with Diamond Tiara all grown up and, well, just look at the summary. What's really great about it is it shows us something of what Filthy Rich loves about his wife, without trying to redeem her or even make her look good. They work well together, and she has her positive points, she just doesn't work well with other ponies, and he's willing to ignore that. This was a very nice little story. :)
Recommended
Battle of Canterlot: I Want to Break Free by Captain_Hairball
Genre: AU/Action/Romance/Blueblood Redemption
Canterlot has been taken by enemy forces. Unfortunately for them, the only leader remaining in the city is Prince Blueblood.
There is a lot going on in this story, where to start? The AU exists because A) there's guns, B) we're seeing the movie from Canterlot's perspective, so who knows what actually happened? There's also a lot of talk of the Princesses being dead because turned to stone, but we all know stone can be undone, so I never quite bought it. Into this situation strides a Prince Blueblood characterized exceedingly well. He knows he's a waste of space; he can barely stand to look at himself in the mirror. He's cultivated a number of useful skills to alleviate boredom, but he's not particularly good at any of them. He uses ponies and doesn't care. He is, in a word, disaffected, and his reluctant rise to leadership by the end of the story is handled extremely well. Speaking of the end, it comes rather abruptly, leaving space for at least another chapter if not a whole other sequel; dangers of writing for a contest. But at least it doesn't stop before giving us a truly epic action sequence. My only real complaint is that this needed another editing pass; continued use of 'the' instead of 'they' was only one issue. Regardless, this was really cool, I hope everyone reads it.
Highly Recommended
The Rise of Chaos by alarajrogers
Genre: Dark/Historical
The dragons had specifically asked that Luna and Discord be present for the peace summit.
Boy, does this story throw a ton of stuff at you right out of the gate. It's apparently in continuity with another of the author's stories, meaning there are some assumptions at the start and some dangling threads at the end. Still, if this does anything well, it's portray Discord. Granted, I tend to be really iffy about killmurder depictions of Discord, but in this story, he at least had a reason. It means the final third is a protracted depiction of him tearing apart a half-dozen dragons with his magic, though, so YMMV. If this does anything else well, it's explaining why he takes over Equestria. I mean, this is far better than just "he showed up one day, was powerful, took over". No, this is more about claiming the throne and setting him up as a much better villain than he was (historically, anyway) in the show. Still, the first half or so has a lot of editing issues that really surprised me; maybe there wasn't time to go back over it? So in total, this has some good ideas, but do beware that Dark tag.
Recommended for Discord Fans
Sunspear by Cerulean Blue
Genre: AU
Hiding at the edges of civilization, Celestia calls on Luna for aid at long last.
So instead of retiring to Silver Shoals, Celestia ran off to who knows where after a major argument with Luna. That's our setup, but you can almost immediately see what the issue is when you look at the chapter wordcounts. None of those needed to be chapters on their own; most are just single scenes. The storytelling is compressed and vague, needing more detail and wordcount to make things like the final line actually work. Because there is a story where that line, which stood out to me, would have been a phenomenally impactful punchline instead of just the last line of the story. But as it is, this is a piece where the monsters are so generic and underdescribed that I couldn't even tell you what they were, let alone what they do.
Vaguely Recommended
For the Benefit of Yaks by SirNotAppearingInThisFic
Genre: Comedy
Pinkie Pie helps oversee the Yakyakistani space program.
This is an expanded version of an Unhinged entry I read some time ago, which was why I couldn't shake the feeling I'd read it before. :) It's pretty great. A reimagining of the real-world space race just silly enough to fit in the world of MLP, starring Pinkie Pie and Prince Rutherford. I'm still of the opinion that the yaks are the worst idea to come out of MLPFiM, but this story really does them justice, and it's just a hoot all the way through. If you like stories about space and science and public reactions, and want to have all those without real-world political angst, you can't ask for a better story.
Recommended
Her Crystal Throne by Skywriter
Genre: Drama
Before she can take the Crystal Throne, Princess Cadence has not one but two threats to contend with.
The bulk of this piece is a (perhaps unsurprisingly) very Cadence of Cloudsdale approach to the events just preceding the start of season three. Cadence and Shining Armor have just found the Crystal Empire, the crystal ponies are no help, Shining is trying to find Sombra and head off his attack while Cadence is starting to think the castle might be haunted. This is where all the surprises come from, as the crystal palace behaves not as you might expect. But the real meat is the last half of the second chapter, where Cadence meets a character portrayed in a way I've never seen before. Plus, it has a cool way of setting up the season premiere's events as prophecy. So altogether a cool idea, executed as well as you might expect.
Recommended
Twilight's Secret Shouting by BronyOverlord
Genre: Comedy
What's Twilight getting up to the in the soundproofed room?
Unfortunately, there aren't a whole lot of possible answers to that question. And though I found the title to this piece outwardly hilarious, it gives the joke away. Such that, by the time the reveal is confirm around the halfway point, this can do nothing but devolve into Stupid Twilight Tricks and a Very Important Lesson. It's a very fluffy comedy, is what I'm getting at, but at least the first half was amusing.
Recommended for Laughs
Pony Peace Is Dragon War (Diplomatic Dragon Noises Included) by HapHazred
Reading by Poniverse
Genre: Comedy
Dragon Lord Ember is trying really hard to get better at this diplomacy stuff. Seriously. She's trying.
(What is with the titles in this contest?) Out of all the stories I've read so far, this is the first where the sovereign in question really is imposing. What a fantastic piece! It is in some ways just an extension of the ideas presented in Triple Threat — the interplay of Ember and Thorax, coupled with their own personal hangups — but it's taken to an extreme thanks to fantastic character work. We're in Ember's head for most of it, so we get to see her struggling with her draconic nature and the little voice in the back of her head that constantly tells her to tear, burn and lay waste to everything around her. And this succeeds because she doesn't always win against it. Thorax is similarly struggling with his nature, especially what he knows ponies see changelings as, and of course neither of them is exactly thrilled by this boring diplomatic summit. It's played for laughs, but the fact is, the whole setup makes Ember especially infinitely sympathetic, to a point where I almost wondered whether that was the author's intent. Regardless, this is a really marvelous effort and I hope everyone gives it the credit it deserves.
Highly Recommended
Seneschal by Kris Overstreet
Genre: Historical Political Drama
Since sending her sister to the moon, Celestia has left her kingdom in the hooves of Princess Platinum's grandson. Surely, he's done well by it.
This story's so good, it's unfair. Filled to the brim with procedures and laws that would have been dry and dull in the hands of a lesser author. But front and center, of course, is a very young, very emotional Celestia. Not only is she grappling — very poorly — with the loss of her sister, but once she learns of her vizier's greed and the oppression levied against her little ponies, she also has to struggle with her power and the spectre of becoming another Nightmare. And really, that's all I could ever want out of something like this.
Highly Recommended
In the Moon's Platinum Glow by Pascoite
Prequel to A Wish for the Ages
Genre: Historical/Drama/Romance
Twice a day, Princess Platinum joins the other enchantresses to raise and lower the moon. But recently, she has been hearing a voice…
This is a dark, intense and surprisingly subtle piece in which Pascoite displays his mastery of perspective, and thus all that happens may not be entirely obvious at first. Platinum is dealing with a whole lot of stuff all at once, and her life slowly falls apart as she falls under the sway of the moon. Its motives are perhaps the most opaque part in this, though that helps ramp the tension up very gradually, until you suddenly realize that, oh shit, everything's gone to hell and no one noticed. Definitely one of the best entries in this contest.
Highly Recommended
A Trolley Problem Named Desire by MagnetBolt
Genre: Comedy/Chrysalis Reformation
Chrysalis is supposedly reformed now. That's why she's living in the Crystal Empire.
The first few scenes of this are some of the funniest comedy I've ever had the pleasure to read. The rest is the best Chrysalis reformation I've read since Three Second Chances — which was not that long ago — and I find myself having to eat my words. There is another way you can reform Chrysalis, and the key isn't keeping her defiant: it's using the changelings. Flurry Heart didn't hurt, either. The plot's honestly fairly simple, though it does have at least one major twist, but the draw here is the fantastic character work and the way this approaches a lot of the fanon that's built up around Chryssy and the Royal Couple over the years.
Highly Recommended
Fit for a King by ZeroMonkey
Genre: Dark AU
Hours ahead of the treaty signing, Twilight Sparkle is chosen to show King Sombra around Canterlot.
The pacing of this story is, in a word, breakneck. Thing A happens, then thing B happens, then thing C happens, and we're never given an opportunity to consider or see anything beyond the list of events that occur one right after another. Which is a shame, because this is interesting at its core, with Sombra taking a shine to Twilight and intimidating the hell out of her because, well, he's still an evil overlord. The sinister just oozes effortlessly off of him. This could have been better; it's all right.
Recommended Only If You Don't Mind Fast Pacing
The Exile's Keeper by QueenMoriarty
Sequel to The Principal's Project
Genre: EQG Drama
Luna's being let out of prison early. One term of her parole? Celestia has a project for her…
I highly recommend people read The Principal's Project directly before diving into this one, first because it was an excellent story, and second because almost no time passes between them and it's hard to pick up the very distinct portrayal of Celestia and Luna easily without the background. But once you're on board, this turns out to be a very good story about trauma, how we react to it, and how we deal with it. It's also a really cool story about Luna. I've seen plenty of EQG fics allude to what her Nightmare Moon event must have been like, mentioning vague snatches of wrongdoing or showing off prison tats. None have ever depicted it, but this one gets the closest, and presents us with the terrifying downside of trying to protect people in the real world. I'm not as overwowed by this piece as I am its predecessor, but if there were a third story, well, I have to imagine it would be pretty stellar.
Recommended
The Last King by Antiquarian
Genre: Historical Tragedy
King Guto of Griffonstone makes one last trip to Equestria to steal a lost artifact and save his dying kingdom.
There's something to be said about writing forgone conclusions. We all know Guto was the last king of Girffonstone, we know the Idol of Boreas remained in the Abysmal Abyss in the modern era, ergo we know how this story ends, right? But that doesn't mean we can't find out the rest of it. Antiquarian has, despite or perhaps because of the audience's knowledge, packed the maximum amount of drama into this piece. This is buoyed by King Guto, a fantastic character, who's backed up by two completely awful sons, a mysterious hermit, and the ancient ancestor of a familiar face. When they talk about the journey being more important, this is the kind of story they mean
Highly Recommended
Heavy Lies the Head by Daedalus Aegle
Genre: Philosophical
Princess Twilight Sparkle of Equestria has a dark conundrum weighing upon her: how to responsibly use Equestria's greatest weapon?
The author says this was written in a rush, and I have to imagine more time could have been nothing but beneficial. It's not bad, but I found it rather dry, especially the first scene. The scene where Twilight talks to the Pillars caught my attention better, but at the end of the day, this is just a bunch of scenes of Twilight asking people in a roundabout manner, "why did we turn a filly to stone?" and I'm just not interested in those stories anymore. Though I will say the ending maybe is worth it.
Recommended If You Don't Mind Lots of Talking
Run Away With Me by semillon
Genre: Shipping/Drama
Flurry Heart releases one of Equestria's greatest foes from prison. She's hoping to prove she's a capable adult; she'll get a lot more than she bargained for.
Halfway through this story, I couldn't shake the feeling that this was the "meanwhile, back at the ranch" of something a bit more epic. For instance, if you're looking for Cozy Glow reformation, you won't find it here. In the first chapter, she's released from stone; in the fourth, not only is she reformed, but so are Chrysalis and Tirek. Along with that are big questions about Cadence's abdication, which thankfully do get addressed by the end, but also suggest a really big story in the background. So what does that leave us with? Some really solid family drama, for one. Cadence and Shining aren't speaking anymore, Flurry Heart's taking the Crystal Throne, she's got her dad as an advisor but is really missing her mom. On top of this is the constant idea of Cozy Glow prickling at the back of Flurry's mind. And, look, I'll be honest, I think this story is more in love with the idea of FlurryGlow than anything. It's a new ship -- I know I haven't seen it before -- but not much is done to really give us an explanation of why they like each other. Cozy just shows up once or twice a chapter to entice Flurry with the idea that there's a third option for her destiny: running away from her responsibilities. Romantic? Yes, but only in the sense of romanticism. The message is that being in love with one person is more important than duty, responsibility, or the love — the true, palpable love — of a princess for her people. How am I meant to take that?
Recommended for Shippers
This Coup Is Going to Be Perfect by Akouma
Genre: Dark/Action
The hive will belong to Chrysalis. All that stands in her way is her sister.
From the title, it was really hard to shake the idea that this was supposed to be a comedy. >.> But it's not. There's no punchline; instead what there is is a great explanation for Chrysalis. Because I've always said the Canterlot invasion made zero sense. Here, we see how someone who would orchestrate that farce comes to power, and the reasons why she really should not have. This was fiendishly clever!
Recommended
The Joy Hive by TheDriderPony
Genre: Comedy/Changeling Fic
Shortly after the wedding, Pinkie Pie finds a lone changeling in her room.
Well, this was a marvelous bit of absurdity, not to mention one of the best changeling fics I've read in recent memory. Pinkie Pie is the perfect character to pick to reform changelings prior to their canon reformation. No one makes friends like Pinkie, after all. And half of the fun is wondering if she has any idea what she's doing. A word to the wise: the time skips in the first few chapters are on the subtle side, so don't be surprised if you find yourself wondering why Starlight Glimmer is being mentioned when you thought this was a season two fic. :B You won't be alone.
Recommended
Princess Trixie of Transylmaneia by AlexTFish
Genre: Comedy/Batpony Fic
So Trixie has bat wings, she's actually the princess of a foreign land, and there's an evil black cloud overtaking all of Equestria.
The whole time I was reading this, I couldn't shake the feeling I was being set up for a feghoot. Thankfully, it was not; I think the idea might have stemmed from this being both amusing and ploddingly slow. The larger issue, though, is that I'm not sure the story-within-a-story was really a good idea. For starters, the author decided to use colored text when we're in the inner story, so large portions of this are written in blue (and later, an amber orange). It was distracting. Secondly, it often doesn't feel like someone telling a story. Characters are quoted verbatim, while there's almost always at least one paragraph detailing the opulence and other details of a newly presented area, somewhere between how you would just describe it third-person, and what someone might say to try and convince you of its opulence. And though the framing device does let us get some input from the 'villain' that we otherwise might not have, I just don't see what was gained over simply telling us the story as it happened. Also, there's a character in there that I just could not figure out: who they are, what their deal is, even what pronoun to use! In all though, this was, as I said, amusing, and it's got pretty darn good batpony world-building to boot.
Recommended for Trixie Fans
Bound by Duty, Led by Love by TheDriderPony
Genre: Political Drama
The King of Donkeys confronts his would-be usurper.
So this is an absolutely bonkers backstory for what Cranky Doodle Donkey was doing between the time he first met Matilda and when he took up his journey to find her. Literally no one saw this coming, but the more I read, the more I was blown away. Admittedly, it takes a while to show how it's connected with canon and why it doesn't have an AU tag, but go read this, it's so original and the world-building is excellent.
Highly Recommended
From Discord Comes Harmony by AkumaKami64
Genre: Historical
The God of Chaos meets a nascent being trying to decide its place in the world.
An uncharitable way to describe this story would be taking every single aspect of canon and smashing it together into a neat package. There's more to this, but the bulk of it revolves around Discord being the greatest chessmaster of all time, far outstripping anything you could say of Celestia, and planning not only a path for the world, but a way to save it from itself by playing the bad guy. I can't say I got completely on board with that, but if nothing else, it helps justify why he was even redeemable in the first place, and his motivation, revealed at the end, was a side of him I've not seen portrayed before.
Recommended for Discord Fans
"Komm Ser Schein" was taken down before I got a chance to read it. Not surprising, I knew one of these would eventually.
After the Flood by Seer
Genre: Dark AU
Captain Bright Steel is questioned about his actions during the changeling invasion.
As the comments point out, this is a very subtle piece, but so subtle that I'm not even sure I get it after reading them. I mean, the writing very efficiently puts the reader ill at ease. It's obvious what the AU trappings are, but despite Shining Armor's changed title, it nevertheless feels like something is going wrong here. So naturally, I kept waiting for the reveal that he was a changeling… but it never came. I think this has some merit, some meaning, and the author's own comment helps push me toward that, but I'm still a little lost, and I put that squarely on myself.
Recommended If You Enjoy AUs
War Games by River Road
Genre: EQG Comedy
Sunset really should have anticipated that she her and friends couldn't play a VR game without Equestrian magic interfering somehow.
I've really never been one for the "sucked into a video game" plot. Video game, book, alternate fantasy reality: they all come out pretty much the same, and even in the hands of someone like River Road, the end result was pretty standard. I mean, yes there is a cool twist in the mystery of what's going on, but the setting sits between familiar tropes and "I have no idea what's going on". Hearing characters shouting their attack names is a lot less cool when you have no idea what those attacks look like. And I really have no idea what's going on in the epilogue. This just wasn't for me.
Recommended If You Like Isekai Stuff I Guess
A Dream Coronation by Jhoira
Review #6600!
Genre: Slice of Life
Fluttershy is crowned Princes of Equestria.
When I see "last minute entry" in a contest, I know to lower my expectations. The precise 1k word count didn't help matters, either. And, well, this feels like a last minute entry. It's brief, it's telly, there are typos, and the plot is practically nonexistent except that, oh wait, the whole coronation is just a daydream of Fluttershy's ahead of Twilight's actual coronation. It didn't accomplish what it set out to do.
Not Recommended
The Princess's Title has also been taken down! Oops!
Shedding Her Shell by Flashgen
Genre: Drama
The Queen is dead, and Skystar is to be crowned. But first, she needs to grow up.
Poor Skystar. She obviously wasn't well in the movie, and she's clearly doing worse here. It is absolutely heartbreaking watching her deal with the loss of her mother, trying to live up to the example she set, all while casting off her childish things in about the worst way possible. I'm really impressed with Flashgen's ability to wring angst out of a one-off character like Skystar.
Highly Recommended
Sister Solstice by Fylifa
Genre: Historical
One sister is getting ready to accept her role as the unified Equestria's new ruler. The other just wants her sister.
I will always be a sucker for historical pieces about Celestia and Luna discovering themselves as kids. :) And this one was just really good. We've got origins for pretty much everything having to do with their portrayals in canon, which is cool since they both start as unicorns named Lumina and Nocturna. Also a really good use of Lauren Faust's OC and a blink-and-you'll-miss-it Project Horizons reference, of all things. But mostly, this is about laying foundations for the story to come, and about the love of two sisters, one of whom is getting caught up in things much larger than herself.
Highly Recommended
The Broken Treaty by AkumaKami64
Genre: Dark AU
When Sun and Moon go to war with each other, the only place left for ponies to find sanctuary is Chaos.
So this is pretty dark and edgy, up front. Discord kills some ponies to make a statement, Daybreaker is really evil, even by comparison, and a lot of what goes on here exists just to earn that Dark tag. The writing also is shaky, but in the ways that earmark someone growing into their writing. Despite all the flaws, the setup given to us in the intro is honestly pretty neat, and the reveal at the end was pretty surprising, too! A chance to make Discord the hero is promising. The author's already written a sequel, so I don't even have to hope they keep at it. :)
Recommended Only If You Like Dark AUs
Fang and Flame by horizon
Genre: Action
Ladies, gentlemen and enbies, our winner! And I cannot say a damned thing about it without giving away the whole game. I mean, there's a comment from the author at the end of chapter one that kind of explains everything, and I wish it hadn't been there, because putting the pieces together myself would have been even more enjoyable. But, if you ignore that, you will treat yourself to the most unique story on Fimfiction (at least, since the last time I said that, which is probably further up in this blog), along with a pulse-pounding thriller that explores Dragon Lord Ember in ways no one else has.
Highly Recommended
Memories of a Foundling brings our unpublished number up to four, leaving…
Murder Most Fowl by CoffeeMinion
Genre: Comedy
Raven picked the wrong week to go on vacation.
...and what a way to end this contest. XD This is a one-joke fic set after Summer Sun Setback, but it's not a joke I've ever really seen before. I had fun with it, it's a great palate cleanser.
Recommended for Laughs
Thanks for the review! Glad you liked!
I was gifted a SPark Cadance plush a few years back and it remains delightful. Hope the new one gets a good display place to go to!
Thanks!
Huh very nice stories.
That's a lotta reviews all at once.
Thanks for the review of Heavy Lies The Head. It's fair
Given infinite time, I'd quite like to revise it and give it more polish and heart, and maybe even a second chapter showing the events of the next year. Maybe someday.
Two Recommended? I'll take that and be happy! Thank you as always for the reviews and input.
Also - 100% agreed on Phoenix Born Rising. The author's doing some amazing stuff with that AU and it's a heck of a story.
Note to self: Pay more attention when the characters try to tell me something.
From what I remember, it was Cozy Glow attaining ultimate power at her own trial by way of insane troll logic.
A less than flattering portrayal of a far-future Applejack as Princess of Justice, which she treats more as Princess of Vengeance.
Huh. I honestly don't remember this one.
Thank you for covering everything! Well, everything that's still up. Maybe next time we can skip the middleman and have you be a judge.
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I avoid judgeships because seriously, do you see how long it took me to do this? <.<
Hehe, it totally did what it set out to do. Write a little fluffy story I had in my head. :D
[The high alpine lake The Voice is currently occupying rises by 1C°] Thank you for your kind praise. I hope once the first arc is done, and I take some time to work on the companion story (which takes place in Luna's rival nation), I can maintain the quality.
Da-yum. Just when I feel like I'm starting to have a proper review library...
What does this mean?
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(From PP's user page.) It's just a summary of how many stories were ranked as what. Every now and then, he's got a DNF (I think) for stories that he did not finish reading.
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Thanks.
Appreciate the review and I'm glad the story worked for you. I kind of had the bad idea of waiting until the week of the deadline to start writing, and it got hectic in the last two days. Also got to add to the criminally low number of Skystar fics on the site, so that's a plus. Write more Skystar, she cute.
This may just be the most terrifying way to describe the story.
As it happens, that entry was an expanded version of an even smaller pile of words based on an idea I had perhaps a year or so before even then.
Or, really, just the expected result of both watching ponies and playing Kerbal Space Program for a few hundred hours. Kerbal and Yak problem-solving strategies differ by less than you'd like to think. Also, I really should get around to reading Changeling Space Program…
When all you have is a hammer, the trick is how you justify treating every problem as a nail.
To take a page out of Admiral Biscuit's book:
Eee! My first Highly Recommended, super happy for it and the review. I do hope that you don't give up on contests all together. It's always a nice little bonus to get one of your reviews for entering them, however long it takes to come after. Sometimes it's the only thing one gets, but it's always appreciated!
Haha, EqG Nightmare incident involving prison tats. What kind of moron writes that?
I'm surprised the one that's marked as a sequel wasn't disqualified, as those were specifically disallowed. Unless the prequel was written after the contest, I guess. Or unless they were both contest entries, but that'snot the case. I skirted the rules a bit by having my entry be a prequel to another story, and FoME granted me a Mills Lane.
Thank you for the review, and I'm gratified you enjoyed it!
Eh, fair enough. I didn't expect everyone to like it.
This was mostly an experiment in writing for me. Maybe if I had a bit more time to devote to it...
A great bumper crop of reviews. Thank you for continuing to highlight so much good stuff.
Thanks for the review.
It was a crossover with The Nightland by William Hope Hodgson.
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Sequels to stories in the previous sovereign contest were specifically allowed. (Waxing Gibbous, also deleted.)
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A lot of people use contests to get themselves writing, which is good and there's nothing wrong with it. I just tend to expect that they're trying to do their best and win, which is why my standards are a bit higher.
It's gone chief
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Shit. Darned iisaw, always deleting his blogs! :| Shoulda seen that coming.
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My bad.
But I will continue to be bad.
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Why do you do that, anyway? It's not something you've always done...
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I got doxxed by some shit going back through my posts, cherry-picking items and then emailing them to my employer. (Along with furry art, and all sorts of other things.)
It was fairly embarrassing, but since her father was an actual fascist-killing war hero, it ultimately didn't affect me too much. But after that I decided not to leave ammo lying around for fanatics like WIL_I_ZIN to pick up.
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Makes sense. :C
Wow, there hasn't been such a high yield contest since The Most Dangerous Game!
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Really? It's only 48 stories, plus the three that were unpublished before I could read them. c.c
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I meant in terms of quality, most are above average, very few stinkers
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Oh, you're right. :O Most contests don't reach that even a distribution.
Waning Crescent was unpublished.
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Yup, right after I read it. :B