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Unsettled by the events involving Cozy Glow, Chancellor Neighsay finds his finely honed blade of critique pointed at a new target: himself.
An entry for FoME's second Imposing Sovereigns contest under the Abdication prompt, now with added Noble subtype!
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This was a nice idea for a story! I can definitely see Neighsay making this kind of decision, given what we've seen of his character. It does bother me a little that he didn't even try to correct his performance first, though--I suppose he figured that his perspective was too deeply-ingrained for him to change it in any reasonable amount of time?
Another more recognizable Greek word for horse is íppos/hippos the root word for Hippogriff, Hippocampus, and Hippopotamus.
An excellent portrayal of a long, dark night of the soul. That said, there are times when the text feels like it's trying too hard in terms of sophistication. I know you were trying to capture Neighsay's voice, but you may have gone too far in doing so. You definitely could've gone into greater depth in terms of the historical roots of the problem—Celestia did have centuries to gently turn ponies' attention outward—but it's actually quite fitting that Neighsay immediately reaches the most drastic and clear-cut conclusion. By his own admission, he doesn't really do nuance, so I can't expect much of it when he's analyzing his own failures.
A fine first entry into the contest. Thank you for it, and best of luck in the judging.
It's not often we get a perspective of an antagonist that also depicts them having entirely reasonable and logically sound set of beliefs - much less having them reflect on those beliefs.
A story well done.
My favorite sentence would be this:
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Thank you for the kind words and valid criticism. Really, this was meant to be a compact, thematic exploration of Neighsay's character that fulfilled the prompt. Stretching this into a lengthy, meandering adventure of soul-searching, self-improvement, and historical analysis might have been more engaging overall, but I wanted to keep the focus tightly on him leaving and why he chose to do so.
This was an effective, if somewhat brief, story. But still, I enjoyed it quite a bit.
Very nice perspective on him. I like it, though I've got no idea who she could be referring to to take his place. Maybe Sunset? Perhaps Starlight?
Maybe Neighsay will take a semister at the friendship school, or take a trip around the world to broaden his horizons, but would he be able to handle it? He is quite old after all, not sure if his body could take it.
I don't really know all that much about Neighsay, and what I do is through a dark glass. Good on you to write a piece that takes a heartily despised character and turns his relentless criticism on himself.
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Hippology or Ippology might be preferable, as álogos is from "not speaking" - which doesn't describe Equestrian equines.
Tirek has too many limbs? Count the limbs on a Pegasus sometime.
Neighsay is getting too old
Good story keep up the good work
This is a too idealistic take.
Still, a good story, I suppose