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The Noble Sir Rocinante has been turned into a frog, and the Lady Belle and her faithful squire have gone on a quest to Frogbury Pond to save him!
Or possibly Sweetie Belle is just really bored and lonely, and looking for something to do...
Takes place prior to the start of the series.
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Total duration
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
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
Ha! She makes Scootaloo! xD
I can safely say that I didn't see that comign, lol. Nice one!
1616142
Thanks. It was honestly one of my more bizarre Scootaloo origin stories, and I just knew I had to try writing it. It was a lot of fun trying to keep her identity from being revealed until the last minute. It also meant I got to play with double meanings on the story name and chapter title.
I'll give this a thumb.
Actually... that wasn't bad at all.
1618432
Thanks. To be fair, my idea of minimal revision was only allowing myself two fairly thorough revision passes (or rather, I allowed myself three, but declared it ready to post after the second one.). For context, though, I have another oneshot sitting in google docs that's more then two months old, and I've revised it more then a dozen times, including some major revisions. I'd love to release it one day, but at this point, I can't even look at the thing without cringing...
1618991
That's the worst...
"There's a good story inside you somewhere, I just know it! Come out, dangit!"
1619193
Exactly. I like the idea, which focuses on 5 seconds or so of Picture Perfect Pony that bugged me. I like my mostly no-tag cast: main characters of Raindrops and Roseluck, and a supporting cast of Daisy, Lily, Doctor Stable, and Nurse Redheart. Plot isn't phenomenal, but is all right. I really like how Daisy's character turned out, even, but... I don't know, maybe if I leave it alone for a few weeks and come back to it...
The Edith Grossman translation is my favourite.
1636611
With an imaginary friend as her squire on an imaginary quest, it somehow totally fit as a source of names.
I really have to reread Don Quixote one of these days. I'm personally assuming Sweetie Belle read the pony equivalent sometime recently.
The funny thing is that now I'm starting to find myself thinking about the aftermath of this fanfic a bit. Don't know if anything will come of that or not.
Just as a note, there's another fanfic, The Impossible Dream, that has a major character named Tilting Windmill...
1637393
Scootaloo needs temporary governance of an island.
1643114
Tempting. Though I'd probably peg the Cutie Mark Crusaders as a whole getting temporary governance of an island later on. Or pretending such, anyways. Of course, if nothing else, she gets governance of Sparkler's old bedroom.
Though to be honest, the main reasons I'm debating about a followup are:
a) The way Ditzy's character developed interests me.
b) There are all sorts of implications to an imaginary character becoming real that would be fun to explore.
If I do a followup, the following will probably be in it in some form, though it's still a bit rough:
1643205
You strike me as the sort that lets an idea take you on a merry ramble. Your mental conception of Ditzy beckons you with a proffered hoof; accept it and sally forth, over hill, over dale, through bush, through briar, over park, over pale, through blood, through fire!
I always preferred to call her "Derpy," but they are merely names.
1643306
Well, I like to explore ideas a decent amount. Whether they get to fimfiction is another matter. I have, er, several unfinished fics that haven't made it over. I don't really like to start posting them till they are complete, though I've been thinking about starting to change that a bit. And then, of course, there's my weird plot idea document. (which is a scary document. Friendship is Wubs, Dobby in Equestria, Scootaloo as the Doctor's new assistant, etc...)
Let's see what I've got sitting around: 4-5 chapters of a Scootaloo adoption fic that's mostly abandoned, about one and a half chapters written about this OC, half of a mlp/Lovecraft oneshot, a completely written oneshot I'm in the process of rewriting, a 7 chapter fanfic involving a pony in a coma I'm halfway through writing, and probably other stuff I'm not thinking about. And about 500 words or so about a sequel to Making Friends, of course.
Oh, and my conception of her is that her name is Ditzy Doo, but she's acquired Derpy as a nickname along the way. She used to not like it, but she doesn't really care that much about it any more.
I was thinking about her getting Twilight's opinion of the whole imaginary friend thing, but I'm wondering if that's actually a good idea after seeing what happened to all the extra Pinkie Pies...
1643417
What Lovecraft influences were you intending to channel for the one-shot? I adore the man's work, although it must be said that the majority of them aren't noteworthy in any particular sense.
Twilight's administration of her test was rather trigger-happy. Her actions failed to discriminate between the originator and the recipient of any distractions that cropped up, despite neglecting to define what level of deviation from the task at hand would earn a one-way trip into the aether. I suppose one could argue that such information was not strictly necessary, but had I been told to simply "watch paint dry" and the being next to me began sprouting additional digits, I would probably give the spectacle a glance, too.
1643462
Innsmouth, or Innsmare, in this case. And it's yet another Scootaloo fic. For some reason, my most cracked ideas tend to be:
Haven't been back to it in a few weeks, and I'm missing most of the middle, which is where the action takes place, though.
And, yeah, it'd have been really easy for her to mistakenly hit the real Pinkie Pie, especially with how distractable she is, and everything that was going on around her. That, and staring at paint drying is pretty boring.
And I have this bad mental picture of Ditzy explaining what happened to Twilight, and her reversing the spell on the spot...
1643493
Being a seapony would indeed explain the small and stubby fin-like wings...
1648640
Right, and you never see her parents because they've already gone to the fully aquatic stage. I still like the idea. I wrote the opening up to the point of the actual trip to Innsmare, and the closing. Theoretically, at that point, I was going to reread "The Shadow Over Innsmouth" to get into the right mood for it, and get more of a feel for the town.
Unfortunately, it was a bit too close to when I'd been prereading Stolen Fire, and I decided to wait until I was in less of a mood to majorly mark up the story with comments for revision.
Things I like about the fic:
-it's sweet. Sweetie Belle remains in character throughout, Ditzy Do is fun as the adult who likes to play (which I always thought was her cutie mark's real meaning: no matter how often someone bursts your bubble, don't stop blowing them. Don't stop dreaming, don't stop having fun).
-The One Who Must Not Be Named reacts very much like you'd expect.
What I don't like:
-it's predictable, at least for chaos mage like me (look up 'Liber Aeldor' and you'll catch my drift). I knew right from the outset how it was going to turn out, and there wasn't any added twist that pushed the gimmick further. To give a comparison to my own works: in Quorum Sensing the story is about the loss of ever getting a cutie mark. The gimmick is the cause of this loss. The added twist is how they all cope with it, and the medical jargon to keep the reader sort of guessing but also adding continuity. In 'Upside to your Backside', the gimmick is obviously the cutie mark idea, the added twist is the social commentary and moral lesson that follows. My point is: you can make this story more memorable than it is at this point.
-the implications. This sort of scenario would be very common, and as such it's happened before and will happen time and time again.
So, possible improvements:
- add in a description of the imaginary friend that doesn't match how she turns out. That'll actually preserve the surprise. It also adds a nice touch by making the living thing actually living. As in: no longer connected to its creator. This type of stories invariably involves some sort of rebellion, having the imaginary friend become more and more independent up to the climax would hint more at something unique.
-after the climax, at least marginally explore the consequences. Not just living conditions, but some real questions about whether or not this is real. And more importantly: how this new life is going to be treated. Birth certificates, medical documents, not to mention the threat of suddenly ceasing to exist. Like this, for instance:
"Wait, does that mean I need to go?"
"No. I mean, it shouldn't. Where would you even go?"
The newly made filly scratched the ground with her hooves.
"I think I like it better here. I don't wanna go back, I can't feel anything there. I like feeling things."
"Well...I don't think you've got any pieces of me I really need. And if you do...maybe we could find some spares?"
Something along those lines. It doesn't have to be as deep as a Zen riddle, but not going into that kind of reasoning at all is a waste of awesome.
My two eurocents.
1718642
Thanks for the critique. This one, I really did feel I could use more feedback on. And believe me, I've very fond of how Ditzy turned out in this fanfic.
I was rather worried about predictability. It was a bit of a delicate balance, and the combination of "no friends" when we know of one, and the "Rainbow Dash" line might have been a bit much. And actually, fleshing things out more is something I need to work on.
And frankly, where things would go after this has been bouncing around in my mind ever since a few days after posting this fic. There are a lot of interesting things left to explore with this idea. Enough so, that, well, at this point, I have about 4k words written in the same universe by now, picking up right after they left Sweetie Belle.
There are a lot of questions. What long term effects will this have on Sweetie Belle, for example? And is this a common occurrence?[1] Is this something temporary that will reverse itself? I've also been thinking of how incomplete somepony that was formed in that way would be, and problems they'd run into[2]. And yeah, questions of documentation arise, and legal paperwork. And Ditzy really needs to consult with somepony who is knowledgeable about magic. The most likely pony is later known for mass slaughter of magical Pinkie Pie clones...
Admittedly, I also want to explore Ditzy's character more, and write cute scenes between them.
I'd been thinking of this mainly in terms of a sequel, though it'd obviously require reading the original. I could just turn it into a multichaptered fic, though.
I'm not really sure about adding in something that was different in the initial descriptions between the real and imaginary versions, though I can see the point. Though I suppose giving her imaginary friend a name, then having her reject the name after becoming real would have worked and made things a lot easier for me. I kept struggling with not having a name to use in descriptions for her when writing this.
I have been thinking about the likelihood of some conflict between them, and wanting to differentiate herself from the original. She's going to have very conflicted emotions about Sweetie Belle once she's gotten over the "I'm alive!" stage. Especially when Sweetie Belle doesn't meet her in the park tomorrow, though the reason will cause other things to be going through her head...
[1] Which I may handle by just giving a bunch of exposition on why it doesn't happen all the time. I've got a few ideas on that front.
[2] For example, consider the current state of her memory. Imaginary friends are only there when you're playing with them...
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There's another problem with asking for help, actually. Twilight might not have arrived in Ponyville yet. The obvious answer is to look for Cheerilee and see if she has any documentation on the phenomenon.
I'm speaking as an occultist now, which means that what I'm about to say is kind of universal in all these types of stories.
-the creation always changes the more time it spends in the real world. Consumed food is a very definite sign of permanence.
-the creator doesn't expend additional energy as the creation roams around. As a matter of fact: a ritual whereby the creator forgets that they made their creation will make it stronger and more real. Like playing out a story and forgetting that it's a story. The creator could ask what the creation would want to be, in broad lines, and as the creation develops its own imagination it becomes more real and more strictly defined.
-beyond a certain point, the creation cannot be distinguished from normal real things, even by those with magical abilities. Ontological intertia is identical for them.
So what I guess would make the most sense is: Sweetie Belle gets out something like a Ouija board with Ditzy (see 'Conjuring up Philip'), and the resulting ritual wipes Sweetie Belle's memory, but also restores whatever she lost. The creation then only has memories of the story it was following, and Ditzy is the only one who knows the whole truth.
Well, that's my first thought, anyway.
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Yeah, I'm tending towards making this not that long before the first episode started. Remember that one shot during the Summer Sun Celebration of Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo being terrified of Nightmare Moon?
And she'll probably start with talking to Sparkler, who, having just barely moved out on her own, and not having a talent for magic, won't know much. I might still use Twilight, but it'll be even more of an unknown on how she'll react. I'm thinking an Encephalograph will be involved.
And, odd as it might sound, one of the minor details that's been running through my head is the frogs they gathered.
Not to mention what I did to Princess Celestia in 'Taking Time'.
Though now you've got me wondering about the connection between the creator and creation, since I'd been thinking more one time spell then continuous effect.
Thanks for the information, btw. I do have some books about magic around, but it's been quite a while since I've referenced them, and I'm not sure any of them would cover this particular situation. I'm not sure if I want to go the wiping memories route, but it's an interesting idea. And now I'm wondering if I should move back the scene where she has her first meal...
"ensorcellment" - I learn new words every day. I am going to have to apply this to wonky code.
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And, sadly, that was literally what I typed when writing that paragraph, off the top of my mind, with no reference to a dictionary, except to make sure I had the spelling right. (Google didn't have it in their spellchecker's dictionary, sadly) I read a lot, and ended up with a pretty large vocabulary, though I don't use it that often in everyday speech. Sweetie Belle must have read some epic fantasy after reading the in universe equivalent of Don Quixote.
Of course, the nice thing is I can point both to Sweetie Belle being a dictionary, and, even though "Babs Seed" came out after this, the clubhouse initiation scene. (Of course, I'm still trying to figure out how to reconcile the location of Sweetie Belle's home from there...)
And, yeah, that'd probably be a perfect place to use it.
/* Some ensorcellment hath bewitched this code. */
Exceptional!
Warm fuzzies all over at the end, too - always a bonus.
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Thanks. I'm rather happy with how it turned out.
And the writing side of my brain is refusing to work on anything other then a sequel. Which is a shame, in a way, since I had other fanfics I was trying to work on...
Well done! I like it. It's short, interesting, pithy and it has an amusing premise. I found it a little silly that Sweetie Belle would be able to come up with all those foreign names, but then again, her parents travel a lot. Faved and thumbed.
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Thanks! And the explanation for her knowing all those names is simply that they are all from the same book. Rocinante is actually the name of Don Quixote's horse, and Rufio is the name of Sancho Panza's donkey. Ditzy's obviously read it, too, since Dorothea is from there, and the character Dorothea pretends to be Princess Micomicona at one point.
I'm not sure why she's read Don Quixote - or more likely Don Rocinante in this universe - but having a fair amount of free time and no friends could do it. Or a school assignment.
I'm working on a sequel at this point, btw (Though obviously unpublished as of yet). Mainly because I started asking myself questions about the magic involved, and what issues an imaginary pony turned real would have. And I wanted to write warm fuzzy fluff about Ditzy and Scootaloo, of course.
I enjoyed "The Assumption of Applejack -or- Appletheosis", btw, and am following the sequel with interest...
Impressive story! It's pretty original, seeing as though there's only one like it. No grammatical errors, far as I see. Excellent job bringing Scoots to life, seeing as though that'd be hard to believably make happen. 8)
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Thanks! I liked it enough that I'm in the process of writing a multi-chapter sequel. I felt like I needed to explore Scoots setting in with Ditzy, and exactly what the consequences of that magical accident were for both Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo. And, whenever I get there, how Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Apple Bloom ended up together at the Summer Solstice celebration without Apple Bloom knowing them afterwards.
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I eagerly await it!
Scootaloo plus Cervantes! So Sweetie Belle actually created Scootaloo?
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Yep. I like how I had orphan!Scootaloo for maybe 5 seconds in this. There are more consequences to her creation, but that's a job for a sequel. As is cute fluff with Ditzy and Scootaloo. Especially with how naive Scootaloo is.
I've actually been plotting a sequel since a day or two after posting this fanfic, because imaginary!Scootaloo is an interesting idea I felt like playing with more. I'm actually on chapter 4 at this point. I'm just trying to get a pretty good buffer of chapters up before I start posting. And chapter 4 hasn't exactly been cooperating, unfortunately. Though I posted a good bit from it on my blog...
That was fantastic!
Seriously, delightful. Thank youuuuuuu author~!
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Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it. I've been busily at work on a multichapter sequel, as yet unpublished. I'm actually trying to get a good backlog of chapters before I start posting it. I'm somewhere in chapter 5 at the moment.
If you want to get an idea what I'm planning, I posted an excerpt from ch. 4 over here.
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Or, what's going to happen the next time Sweetie tries to talk to her imaginary friend, now that she's not imaginary anymore?
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Depends if she's in the room or not.
But the relationship between them will definitely be different. And Sweetie Belle is used to knowing everything about her imaginary friend, and never having conflicting opinions on things. That's obviously going to start to change.
Looks left, looks right. "Why am I alone in a pond?"
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Because Sweetie Belle had been reading a ponified version of Don Quixote recently? Or Scoots had?
Well, that was unexpected! But I liked it.
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Thanks!
Maybe one of these days I'll get back to writing the sequel, starring Ditzy and Scootaloo. I got about 5 chapters into it. Ditzy letting Scootaloo choose her own name may have been a mistake, as she ends up as 'Scootaloo Daring Do'
.
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It could be worse:
24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lvbvl9SZzr1r2ic9ro1_400.jpg
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Quite true. And one of the amusing things about how I was writing it was that Scootaloo actually ends up loving the Daring Do books long before Rainbow Dash ever even finds out about them...
You had me at the Don Quixote reference.
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Thanks!
I really really enjoyed writing this story, and I do rather like the implication that Ditzy and Sweetie Belle are both fans of both Don Quixote and the Wizard of Oz.
I did, in fact, start writing a sequel to it at one point. I actually still have around the first five chapters I wrote of it, which I never published. At this point, I'm basically figuring I'll hold off on doing anything more with it till either Just Winging It or Cubic Zirconia finishes, though.
It was going to be mainly about Ditzy and Scootaloo settling down as a family, and trying to figure out if there were any bad consequences to what happened at the end, and if the spell's likely to unravel...
1643417 I think it's a good idea, especially since Twilight has prior experience with this phenomenon.
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How's the sequel to this coming along?
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It's effectively on hiatus. Back when I was writing it, I had this idea that I'd write the whole thing and then publish once I had it finished. I got stalled out around the sixth chapter, and started writing something off the top of my head to temporarily take my mind off of it.
That became the first two chapters of Just Winging It, and most of my writing focus shifted over there. And then when rough drafts of the first couple chapters of Cubic Zirconia came around, that killed any other time I was spending with it.
I still hope to go back to it when one of the two is done, and I've been starting to think about just releasing some of what I've already written of it. I'd feel better about that if I had cover art and a proper name for it, though.
I still have an outline that says what happens basically in the rest of the fic, roughly, so it's planned out, anyways.