• Member Since 4th May, 2013
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Estee


On the Sliding Scale Of Cynicism Vs. Idealism, I like to think of myself as being idyllically cynical. (Patreon, Ko-Fi.)

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Source

Every so often, you just have to stop and take in the scenery -- or at least find a place where you can develop some photos of it. Snap Judgment's been out of Equestria for a few years, and he's just a little behind on the news. Renting an incredibly cheap piece of land near the border of Ponyville, so he'll have a place to park his home/caravan/darkroom without issues... that just makes sense. And it's so pretty out here. Maybe he'll even find a place to settle down.

Or maybe, once he learns exactly why that land was so cheap, he can get a decent head start.

Nopony lives near the cottage. There are a few reasons for that. And sometimes, they come visiting.


(Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages. Cover art by Dipi11, used with credit under open permission.)

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 40 )

"If Zephyr Breeze was a photographer".

This was a fun one, I wonder what Discord thought when he realized this dude had absolutely no idea who he was?

There were two unicorns, towards the back of the main group. Both white ones. One was pretty. The other was gorgeous.

The ambiguity of this paragraph could start a war that would destroy all of Ponyville.

circs #3 · 1 week ago · · ·

Poor chickens.

Downloaded into

The Triptych Continuum Rebooted
AU Folder
:trollestia:

Yes, you can learn a lot from life. For instance

If a deal seems
Too Good To Be True
It Probably Is
:trollestia:

11369758
Considering Fluer's presence, this is probably in the Anchor Foal/DELWMG/AFII timeline, rather than the main post-Tripytch timeline.

Good story Estee :)

Now I want to hear it from Mr. Thickpants perspective. Why WAS she keeping a rhino?

Life outside looking in always seems the darndest thing, don't it?

How lucky that strange creature that spoke of chaos only stopped by for a chat.
Shame about the rest after that, but he was warned...

Another good and fun story.

Some of your best stories are written this way, from the perspective of somebody absolutely unrelated to the usual cast, narrating what happened to them without the contex the POV of the Mane 6. Keep them coming!

RyRy #11 · 1 week ago · · ·

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See when I first read it I thought it was obviously Rarity and Flur in that order. But now that I think about it without the proceeds description that sentence could start wars

Lol, Snap Judgement. Perfect name for this character.

Finding out this was congruent with AF/DELWMG timeline made me happy. I almost wish we could have seen the scene where he tried to ask Fluttershy out, just to see their reactions. Thanks for this story, and good luck with tomorrow and the proceeding days this week.

Delighted that I called that it was a rhino and not an elephant! Did you know rhinos often need to be helicoptered in upside-down, feet in the air? It's easier on their hearts.

Thought the ugly dude he was describing was Snowflake at first and I was thoroughly offended on Snowflake's behalf. Great story, thanks for the read!

RDT
RDT #14 · 1 week ago · · ·

A weirdly adorable story. Vibing with this main character.

Also, Fluttershy's going to come looking for her chickens back. Get clucked, Snap Judgement. There is no escape.

11369718
Probably something along the lines of, "I almost feel sorry for him." If you've never even heard of Chaos with a capital "C", then you're definitely not ready for Ponyville with a capital "P".

Just how long was this moron gone from Equestria that he didn't recognize the Lord of Chaos?

11369765
If it's Fleur, yes. But it's specified that she's with Rarity & Snap Judgement doesn't mention seeing her with Fluttershy.

It's not necessarily even Fleur.

Still, concensus seems to be on your side so I will change it

:rainbowdetermined2:

11370025
Well he did drop out of school, so probably never got to that part of the history books.

Oh, my. He IS a bit behind on the news.....and I'm betting he doesn't spend a lot of time hanging around police stations.

The REALLY annoying one with her own caravan and the perfect tail streak

Huh, so Trixie has experience with other nations and cultures ... that could be handy over in Glimmer. (Who knows, maybe Trixie "goes crazy" less often then the common run of Equestrians?)

OH CELESTIA'S HEATED HOOVES THE CHICKENS ARE NESTING IN MY CABINETS.

:rainbowlaugh:

My reactions in succession
>Ah, another markfallen story, this should be interesting
>Oh, he's a creep, nevermind
>This pony is absolutely going to die

11369718
I'll bet he'll get a kick or insult out of the inevitable panic attack when Snap figures it out.

Oh boy. Arrogant young stallion deep in his mark and terribly ignorant of almost everything else. This won't end well.

Heh. The continual run-ins with Trixie are a fun detail. Unfortunately, you need some desirable qualities of your own, not just destiny's approval.

Great design on the monster transport cart... though Snap's utter inability to consider what might be in there surprises me. I suppose he doesn't associate monsters with home. And I hope Fluttershy's getting well-compensated for looking after that whatever-it-is.
(Addendum: To be fair, it's not exactly a monster...)

They had another fight. Different kind of fight. If the kids are hearing this, then I can't write about the fight.

Well, I suppose a photography talent would lend itself to voyeurism.

But my shutter-release button kept sticking. And the strap kept wrapping around the lens. It was like my camera was trying to strangle itself.

Some things shouldn't be captured on film. Or at all.

So some chaos is fine, but photography is about capturing it. Which, I guess, sort of freezes it? And maybe that's a kind of order.

Oh, you poor fool.

I can even swear on Honesty, like some of the ponies did in those old stories you used to like.

Ooh, lovely cultural note.

There's something hilarious about somepony only knowing Applejack as "the mud supervisor."

It's funny how Fleur can shoulder an entire timeline aside when she wants even a moment in the spotlight.

Poor guy. (He's a creep, sure, but no one deserves having a stampede through his house.) And unless Discord did anything with that branch—which is rather more subtle than his usual methods—this really was just Ponyville being Ponyville. Alas, poor Snap. Hopefully this will teach him the importance of keeping up with current events. Thank you for an outstanding bit of epistolary nonsense.

Snap Judgement is a stallion who is good at photography but not at anything else and he's got no sommon sense. Given his sister's name she's got all the common between them but he refuses to listen. When he eventually meets his sister agian she is going to tell him that he should have rad the newspapers and books she send him.

We all feel for Snap, but what about Sensibility? Thankfully he's alive and all, but wow, this must've been a wild ride, getting all this just through his letters.

At least she'll get to see him now!

I really enjoy these.

I imagine that's another one for the mayor's list of animals which Fluttershy is not allowed to keep within city limits.

Points to Snap Judgment for giving Discord the benefit of the doubt, assuming he's a kind of sentient that he simply doesn't know about yet, and thus not offending the Lord of Chaos in any immediately life-changing ways.

Even as he's running for his life, Snap Judgment notes which of the mares are hot. It's a shame he was born too soon for easily portable video recording devices.

Georg #26 · 1 week ago · · ·

Subhead: Fluttershy's Endangered Animal Breeding Selective Romance Facility is a great success.

11369718
I got big Zephyr vibes as well!

If not for him appearing in Anchor Foal 2 I'd not mind these two meeting up, only to ruminate about their love lives.

11370166

Fleur-Verse is best Verse.

This poor deluded fool. I can’t wait until he finds out about Luna. Heck he may not even know of Cadance. He is going to get quite the cultural shock soon enough.

Look, I know you worry about me. And when you worry, you write it down. Over and over. I read it all the time, at least when your letters catch up to me again. About how I shouldn't traveling the world when I dropped out of school so young that, in your opinion, I couldn't have possibly learned much of anything about it. That you think I can't take care of myself. But you know what it means, when a mark shows up as early as mine did? It means you don't NEED school! I also don't need the books you've tried to send me, because that's just extra weight to carry. But you can keep going with the newspaper clippings, because some of the paper is good for soaking up chemical residue. And that's all it's good for, because I am out on the road and I learn from LIFE. Maybe one of these days, my little sister will understand that. Who needs Current Events when the whole planet is your classroom? It's sure a lot more fun, and there's no grades!

You know, he does have a point about the whole "the best way to learn is to go out and live it" but he's also putting A LOT of faith in the fact that this is ALL he needs, and is frankly more than a little arrogant about it.

That said, this all does nicely explain how the heck he doesn't have even a clue about what he's going to get himself into here shortly.

And when I first crossed, I thought I'd just make my way to Canterlot, get all the best photos bound, shop them around to the companies which publish world travel books, pick the one which offers me the biggest voucher, and then I'd come visit you for a while.

Seriously, his whole attitude towards all this feels dangerously like one of those get rich quick schemes that promise the moon and more, and we all know how those tend to go (or should know at least).

None of them ever seem to understand that a traveling photographer needs to haul his own darkroom.

Well actually...does he? Because I know this is an Estee fic, which are often set in a universe not quite parallel to canon, so not all of the same details apply...but I'm pretty sure it was demonstrated in the show that Equestria has instant cameras by now.

But, again, the guy's willfully ignorant on these sort of things, so...for all I know, he's just making it worse for himself.

And yeah, the smell still gets out, but it's never been so bad that a reasonable sapient would complain about it. I just can't find any reasonable sapients. And don't go starting on how my mark means it just doesn't smell bad to ME. Photography's been around for years. The world should have adjusted.

Yeah, no, this guy's arrogant enough that he probably deserves every bit of whatever is coming to him. :ajsmug:

If I haul my caravan into Canterlot, then it's got to be parked. Start on the developing there and one of those rich jerks is gonna complain for no reason at all, just to get my house off his street.

Okay, no, that part's true. We all know of that one guy in our local neighborhoods that's like that.

I'm a photographer! I need to recognize when the conditions exist for the perfect shot just about INSTANTLY and act on them before the moment's gone!

That explains a bit. (I really need to stop commenting on every other line about this guy, or we'll be here all night :trollestia:)

And that mare. You know the one. The REALLY annoying one with her own caravan and the perfect tail streak, that I kept finding over and over across the whole world and she always said that she was just looking for new places to put on her shows and seeing me all the time was this really irritating coincidence instead of what I knew it was, which was destiny trying to put us together.

I'm half-and-half about that, because on one side, I can see his point--they have enough in common you WOULD think they're meant for each other. But then on the other, one arrogant pony who thinks they know it all but doesn't actually, plus another arrogant pony who also thinks they know it all but doesn't actually, probably equals disaster. It'd be like trying to put out a fire with more fire, basically.

And honestly? I think even Trixie's smart enough to foresee that coming and want to avoid it. :trixieshiftleft: (addendum: the bath situation also probably helps settle the matter too)

So maybe it will, if the books sell well enough that I can live on royalties for a while.

At this point, I'm pretty sure that's wishful thinking. But you never know. Having not seen his photographs, the guy might actually have great stuff that'll make it all connect in the end. He does sound like he really knows what he's doing with his photography, and he does have a mark for it, so maybe it really could happen. If he's smart about it, which I am confident he is not, but, again, if I keep commenting about that... :derpytongue2:

One of the haulers said something about how they had to make the drop before all the stuff they'd pumped into it wore off. No kidding. Imagine how bad it would have been if the scent-cutting spells hadn't been working.

Oh you poor, poor, naive fool...

And the prismatic has tail streaks! Sort of. A lot of them. Maybe I just prefer two-tone.

And in that moment, Rainbow Dash looked up from whatever she was doing and felt like she needed to feel really insulted for some reason. :rainbowlaugh:

I had this visitor.

Oh, this'll be good--I didn't expect him to make an appearance in this. :trixieshiftleft:

He would be sure to tell the vet about how funny I was. And about the simply DASHING mane.

I'm sure it was quite chaotic in appearance. :ajsmug:

There was an alicorn. A NEW alicorn. WHAT THE BUCK DID I MISS?

Only everything. So, you know...nothing too important or anything. :rainbowlaugh:

The other was gorgeous. Photo-gorgeous and model-perfect. And I wish I'd gotten a better look, especially at the white steak in that soft pink tail, but she was way too tall for me anyway.

I'm trying to figure out who this pony is. I feel like it should be obvious, but whoever it is, it's just zooming right over my head...it's probably going to concern one of those other Estee fics I haven't read, isn't it? :derpytongue2:


Anyway, yes, the rabbit most definitely never got involved, and oh boy, did Snap Judgement ever dodge a bullet there. :trollestia:

11369718
Probably the same thing I did: "Oh, this'll be fun!"

Considering this was Ponyville right next to Fluttershy and the Everfree forest. Discord just showing up was OVER KILL that said HE was warned

What a complete jackass. He thinks he's too smart for school, moves into an area other ponies avoid after doing zero research, creeps on Fluttershy under the shoddy pretense of "getting her picture," then is completely surprised when things go South.

Two words, Snap Judgement: (1) Don't (2) Breed

[Edit] Just to make things clear, I don't think he's being a creep for simply being a male interested in a lovely female. There's nothing inherently wrong with that. He's being a creep because he's planning on taking a picture of her without her knowledge or permission.

That's fully into stalker territory.

I’m somewhat fascinated by his beauty standards in regards to tail Streaks Vs. Stripes Vs. Whatever Rainbow’s counts as, and whether he had such tastes before Trixie, or if she really just made that much of an impression on him.

The rhino reveal was excellent…. I didn’t see that coming any more than our protagonist, although I at least knew the scale of what he was likely in for. That certainly would be a hell of a tenant species to have to keep long term…. I wonder what he was doing there in Equestria, and how long he stayed.

I don’t even think discord had to do anything at the end there. He just sat back and waiting for the bearer levels of chaos to do the job for him :rainbowlaugh:

11370949
Even somepony named Snap Judgment knows better than to trust an instant camera with world travel photos meant for a book, at least if his cutie mark is photography. He knows that with instant, you only ever get the one photo, at that size, on that medium, no copies.

With a negative analog camera, like your standard 35mm, you get a master you can make multiple prints of, at practically any size. (Movie film was 35mm, and it scaled up to a theater screen.) For full color printing, you make masks from the negative for printing cyan, magenta, yellow, and black plates. Instant can’t do any of that.

:trixieshiftright: Snap is it? Here's the deal I let you park next to my great and powerful wagon and I'll only charge you $20 bits a month
Pro rated every Saturday for the dragon and his captive. No he's not dangerous but the captive whines a lot. That's why Saturdays are pro rated their bedroom theatre is awfully bad, More corn then Farmer Pops field... But think, you're parked right next to a Princesses castle...
But I must warn you thee Great and Powerful Trixie Snores... Yes that's $20 bits up front
:twilightoops: You're charging $20 bits?
:trixieshiftleft: Why not, I've had a lot longer to suffer through Spike and Raritys romantic antics then anypony
:facehoof: But I live here
:trixieshiftright: That'll be $25 bits for you
:twilightangry2: But It's MY castle

:moustache::raritywink: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeKKKKKKKKK The nasty dragon has captured me once again... Oh what shall I Do?
:facehoof: Fine here's your stupid bits

11370949

trying to figure out who this pony is. I feel like it should be obvious, but whoever it is, it's just zooming right over my head...it's probably going to concern one of those other Estee fics I haven't read, isn't it? :derpytongue2:

Fleur most lkely

That was a good story.

Scyphi #40 · 1 week ago · · 1 ·

11371280
Oh, yes, yes, of course--I guess I've gotten so used to our age of digital photography effectively rendering all of this obsolete for the average citizen that I forgot some of the limitations of instant photography. :twilightblush:

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