• Member Since 1st Aug, 2019
  • offline last seen 9 hours ago

applezombi


I think it'd be better if I just shut my mouth, cuz I hate how I look, how I sound.

T

Ponyville Retirement Village is being evacuated to a newly constructed shelter underneath Town Hall. It only makes sense; with this new villain 'Tirek' on the rampage, it's only a matter of time before he's drawn to Ponyville, just like every other monster, natural disaster, or hapless club of cutie-mark seeking agents of chaos.

What could possibly go wrong during the evacuation?

(Alternate Universe tag because of minor deviations from the show's canon)

This story was written for a Quills and Sofas speedwriting contest. Check us out here, and come join in the fun!
Prereaders include AuroraDawn, Holtinater, Exodd, and AFanaticRabbit. They're all amazing authors, so please go give them some love, hm?

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 12 )

Curse you Apple, you always know how to break me :fluttershysad: . Only a few words in and I can already feel my eyes watering, cheeks soaked with tears by the end. How dare you make me so emotional with every story of yours!
(Of course just being silly, not seriously angry. *hugs* I loved this! Short and touching and dang these waterworks! XD)

Hm just one thing. The Tragedy tag is not appropriate.
The tragedy is when the story fundamentally ends up badly. E.g. here If she had failed to bring Scootaloo to safety

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Okay! I see your point. I had the same conversation with my pre-readers, and they all were of the opinion that it's a tragedy simply because he dies in the end, even though he accomplished his goal of saving Scootaloo. I guess I see it as a tragedy in the sense that, at least for me, a heroic death creates a feeling of catharsis (which is a pretty classical definition of tragedy). I can certainly see your view, though.

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I agree that this story is not a "tragedy" even though selected events may be "tragic".
Maybe it could classify as a tragedy, genre-wise, if you took the writing in a more dismal direction, but the words you've chosen here convey something different.

He died, yeah, but he succeeded. Triumphed, even.
Indeed, it was a death worthy enough to earn him his own personal "Valkryie" escort.
Given title of the story, I thought it a deliberate allusion on your part.

Whether you agree or not, I enjoyed your story and am grateful you shared it here.

10747048
From the guidelines for the tags:

Tragedy

The literary term “Tragedy” shouldn’t be confused with how the expression of something being “tragic” is used. A sad story is not necessarily a tragedy when in writing. Tragedy involves the downfall or failure of the main character. This again, does not mean that they die—the tragedy can lie in the failure to achieve something they have worked for through the whole story. The build-up to such a thing and the eventual failure is what the tragedy is.

Here it EXPLICITLY says that a Tragedy and a “tragic” story are different thing.
Tagging properly is important, I tend to dislike Tragedies and may skip a story based on that tag. I didn’t notice it on this one before reading it.

I am amazed that anyone is bothering to complain about whether this should have the "Tragedy" tag on it.

Fucking onion ninjas doing their evil work while I'm trying to read this... :applecry:

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Because some readers, like me, won't read a tragedy. I see enough failures in real life not to want to read about them in fiction.

Successfully completing an objective while not surviving is not a tragedy. Failing to achieve the objective, and then dying knowing you failed, is a tragedy.

Tragedy is a state or condition beyond the elements of a story. Julius Ceasar is a tragedy because the noble motives that lead Brutus to commit regicide are used against him by Casius. He manipulates Brutus' perceptions of what constitutes a threat to the nation and his profound sense of duty to it, to defend his Republic against all threats leads him to a course of action he might not have taken without the influence of Casius. The tragedy is that of all the conspirators against Ceasar were out for themselves, but Brutus, despite his errors of judgement, is still a noble figure, struggling to do what he believes is right, not for himself, but for his nation. He is therefore honored, not for his actions, but his unselfish motivation. Tradegy isn't always sad. It's thoughtful.

I halfway expected Scoots to be the one who died when I first saw this story. Mr. Waddle though was an interesting choice, now I am curious about his life prior to Ponyville Retirement Village. His wife sounds like she was an amazing mare a regular spitfire full of spit and vinegar to the very end.

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