• Member Since 8th Feb, 2020
  • offline last seen February 24th

Vartil-Shadowalker


I write to let my active imagination out, but I'm learning as I go.

Sequels1

T
Source

Death died and in doing so he found himself in another more colorful world. A world that has magic leaking into it, a world where Death can finally find peace.... Or can he

Cross over between my little pony Equestria girls and Supernatural might add more later
I do not own either respective properties go to there respective owners

EDIT: Because of the new chapter Siren Song I felt it best to move the story to teen if this discourages you from reading I am truly sorry that chapter was how I felt I wanted the story to go...besides you can't have story starring Death without...you know. So again I apologise to my readers

Edit: 1000 people views wooo, thank you guys so much, I have no words that could be enough to describe how happy I am

Chapters (16)
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Comments ( 77 )

Well, this certainly looks interesting. I can't wait to see what direction you take this.

10274577
Thanks I had fallen out of supernatural for a while so I've been binge watching and I always liked og Death and I hated that they killed him

10275025
Thanks this is my first slice of life story I hope I don't disappoint

Feel like you need to have Death state to the Principles why he suddenly appears out of no-where, but other than that pretty good.

10277250
I thought I did but I could have the Principal's look into in the next chaoter

10277968
Thanks the next chapter is going to be the Principal's doing research on Thanatos aka Death and I figured I'd give him more personality than just I'm as old as god and don't really care

10278077
Thank you and things just got even better

10278305
Your welcome though I don't know why your thanking me I just literally threw this together,I thought people wouldn't like this chapter,and what do you mean by 'race has begun' did you find something I didn't realize?

10279139
The race to find out who he really is. Also I was thanking you for following me

A happy Fluttershy is a cute Fluttershy

10280094
Fluttershy is the hardest character that I've ever tried to do, like I want to right her like I do ally other characters but then I have to remind myself it's Fluttershy she's shy,so I figured I'd give a little confidence boost by our resident apocalypse member,that and certain music can really give you courage

10280113
At least you're not writing Zecora

10280117
Yeah I don't even think I'd ever want to write zecora

Anon-a-miss Vs Death.. I think we all know who is going to win there.

It's funny because EG Flutteryshy being a metalhead is cannon.

10282079
I know I just start her transition early, and A pissed off Fluttershy might be a bit more scary than death

So, Death is angry...
RD and Mac put Sunset into the hospital...

Why do I hear Jen Titus' music in the background.

10283081
Oh they'll be hearing more than that *the rumble of an all black beetle is heard in the distance*

Comment posted by Hell Keeper666 deleted Jun 14th, 2020

10283153
Did you not like this chapter? I thought it turned out good plus I knew I wanted Sunset in a car accident to progress this specific ark, don't worry she lives and death deals with more than people

10283996
I like the chapter I'm talking about Big Mac Rainbow Dash and the CMC

10283996
And make me feel like I want to go inside your story smack Rainbow punch Big mac and give the CMC a talking to

10284008
Hahaha good, I figured hey RD and Mac two characters who I don't really see story's of let's pair them and make them the villain of this ark to be honest I kind of came up with that on the fly and have the crusader's make a mistake cause that was going to happen regardless of if sunset was hurt or not

YESSS MAKE THEM SUFFER

I am still waiting for the hammer to drop.

The karma police have finally caught up with them

Well, it looks like Judgement Day has come for the students of Canterlot High.

I like you.
Krieg - German for war.
Nälänhätä - Finnish for famine.
Zaraza - Russian [зараза]? Polish? (One of the Slavic languages. Quite hard when many words are similar.) for plague.
And finally Thanatos - Greek god of Death.

Your naming convention is really nice.
(If they had these names in the show then I'm sorry. Didn't watch it)

10316267
I see it like this:
War in the school between students.
Famine on the farm.
Pestilence... some obscure connotation with Dash.
And Death takes them all at the end.

10316286
We'll see where I go with it and none of the horsemen in supernatural had names besides what they represented, I gave them their names and your correct Zaraza is Polish, I decided to give them all names, Death was easy just looked it up the others I decided let's choose something in another language that sounds like it would sound like a real name and I'm glad you're liking the story so far 😁

This puts a smile on my face :pinkiecrazy:let the suffering begin.

Hey this story is pretty good just started today and I'm already excited for the next chapter keep up the great work

10322790
Thanks, I'm already working on it and I hope to not disappoint

Love the chapter, also nice song choice

10347186
Thanks that was the part that I had some trouble with, I find music with specific scenes helps set them better, so it took me a bit to find the right song after that it was figuring out the rest of the chapter and I'm glad you liked it

OK. Some advice.


Capitilize names. Death. not death. God. not god. Etc.

Second. use italics for expressing thoughts. not ' '

third. check your spacing.

aside from that, I got no real complaints! This is the good good. Death has always been my favorite Horseman.

Sunset POV:

first off. Just use the third person. Don't switch POV's too much.

As I sat in the office across from Principal Celestia and Vice Principal Luna,I waited to be told how much it would cost to repair the school. They decided not to press charges and to keep my name out of the papers, mostly for the sake of the other Equestria,but they had told me I would have to pay for the repairs.

Missing spaces for your commas.

"Well Mrs Shimmer" Vice Principal Luna started.

Mrs is for someone who is married. Ms is for someone who isn't. Also. a period after both. and missing a comma at the end of the quotation.

Rainbow Dash POV:

don't switch POV for cahpter's. and use a transition marker like

"


"

10360919
Most my chapters are like this but I'll implement you're idea in the chapter I'm working on, I like doing POVs of different characters and giving the readers the perspective of the characters and the interactions and thoughts of those characters

Links. Links. Sooooo many links. Just describe it in-chapter. Or insert a picture. Aside from that.


Death is gonna kill some boi!

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