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Source

It was dark. Somewhere, beyond the cave, beyond her cage, it was raining. And the tide was coming in.


Content warning: implied past sexual abuse
Thank you to The Legendary Bill Cipher, Zontan, Lofty, Red Parade, Krazy, themoontonite, and Dioxin for their help with prereading and editing.


Written for a Quills and Sofa Speedwriting Group panic fiction contest, with the prompt "A martyr, a witness, and a cage". Feel free to join us on Discord here, we have a good time.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 12 )

It was a great contest, and this was a great entry! Great writing!

“They, er, took something from my sister, the youngest one. Something that wasn’t theirs to take, and something she’d never get back.”

Oh no.

“So I took far more from them, to ensure they wouldn’t be able to do it again, to anyone.”

Despite the ultimate outcome our main character faces for this, I still found it satisfying. Even if it was only for a moment.

I guessed correctly who our main character was when she mentioned sisters, but it didn't cheapen the story for me at all. I love the way the end calls back to the beginning. This is a really good story, Silent.

It's a good story, Whisper. But you're fired for hitting me in the feels.

Well, Whisper knows how to kick you solidly in the emotions.

-Chessie

Reese #5 · June 6th · · ·

Hm, an interesting story, aye; thanks for writing.

10272528
I sure do!

10272398
Thanks! It was a pretty fun contest. :twilightsmile:

10272440
Thanks, wish. Your feedback always makes me smile!

10272487
I tend to do that, on occasion. Strange, I'm usually the one firing everyone else for this...

10272689
Thank you for reading, and for leaving a comment!

Reese #7 · June 6th · · ·

10272712
Heh, quite a bit easier than your side of things, but you're welcome. :)

Seer #8 · June 6th · · ·

Wow Silent, this is some seriously remarkable stuff.
The bleak, wet darkness is so well conveyed. I love how you subtly you tell the backstory. Nothing more is said than needs to be, to imply awful, awful things and do it so poetically... it's breathtaking honestly.
My aching limbs shivered at the touch of the first trickle of seawater as it rose to greet me, as gentle as Sonata’s lover should have been.
This line is exemplary of this in particular.
You should be seriously proud of this, its a stunning piece of work

Really enjoyed reading. It's bleak, dark, but oddly enough there is a strong current of hope too.

"A society grows great when we plant trees whose shade we know we shall never sit in."

Thanks for writing :twilightsmile:

Damn. Damn this is good. The atmosphere is powerful here.

The atmosphere of this story is very chilling though I wonder which alicorn was that. Celestias? Luna?

10368731
You were correct the first time, it's Celestia.

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