• Member Since 19th Sep, 2013
  • offline last seen February 6th

Palm Palette


Keep palm and palette on.

E

Twilight has no idea why she’s in outer space. She would very much rather not be there. In fact, it would be swell if somepony, anypony, would heeelp!

Good thing Pinkie Pie’s on the job. Wait. Pinkie Pie? She’s doomed, isn’t she?

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 55 )

“Whoa, don't write Twilight's orbit-uary yet.”

Dammit, Pinkie :twilightangry2:

The puns are becoming real. Run!

....the puns. THE pun. sigh.
Well done :moustache:

Feature material easily.

9308416
Your avatar perfectly fits this story.

Hold onto your butts. Here come the cosmic puns.

Let's hope this little incident teaches Twilight to be more down to earth :trollestia:

9308175

Pinkie Pie has just become a positively existential threat. :raritydespair:

9308729
That comic is hilarious and 120% what Twilight would do.

“Missing?” Rarity asked. Her eyes darted about as the removed the objects—especially the sharp and pointy ones—from the nearby airspace.

Shouldn't that be a "she"?

Obligatory warning: This comment is long. Good news is, it's comprised mostly of quotes, so it's not actually that long.


“What am I even doing here?” Panic rose as she flapped her wings, and the shifting of her mass made her wobble. She might be drifting somewhere, or she might not. The nearest star was at least ten light years away.

"How are you even alive?"

Twisting about, Twilight tried to stop spinning, but wound up tumbling faster somehow. “Uugh,” she moaned, feeling slightly greenish while the universe lurched about like a lopsided ballet dancer doing a headstand on a lumpy trampoline. She focused to quell her queasiness, lest her lunch wind up in orbit around her. “They’re bound to have noticed that I’ve gone missing by now,” she muttered, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath of nothing as the tumbling got to her again. “Yeah. I’ll bet that Pinkie’s galvanizing the others into action right now, and not off doing something completely random that has no possible way of helping whatsoever. Eh-heh, heh.”

Good guess!

“Help? Why would I need—waaaait...” Her eyes went wide and then she squinted, peering around at her surroundings. “Towering white buildings... Confused flying ponies...” She stuck her tongue out, slurping it against the street. “Damp, vaporous soil...” Groaning, she clenched her eyes shut. “My head's in the clouds, isn't it?”

Yes. Your head's in the clouds. Literally. :facehoof:

Oh Pinkie...

“Whoa, don't write Twilight's orbit-uary yet. She'll be fine so long as we save her.” Pinkie plodded around, pacing again. “We just have to figure out how.”

Puns ahoy! I'm punting on more puns!

I'm sorry.

She sighed, holding up a hoof and twisting it back and forth. “Neat space fact: despite popular belief

~~~

really cold.”

While I can't say I understood all of that, cool.

Rainbow Dash and Rarity exchanged a worried glance, but they didn't question Pinkie. That pony was too hysteric to reason with. The best thing they could do was to humor her until she calmed down, hopefully before Twilight's castle resembled a Thanksgiving turkey.

Heh, not a good metaphor for ponies.

There's a rather peculiar and somewhat contradictory phenomena that happens to space travelers. See, outer space is so vast that it's said to be infinite. If the universe is truly infinite, though, then everything possible should exist somewhere, and anything that can happen will happen. So if something exists, that means it's also possible that this thing could cross paths with the space-goer. Thus, if something can potentially exist, then there's a surprisingly high chance that a pony floating in space will encounter it, even though space itself is mostly empty.

While this doesn't make sense to me, okay.

“Well, if you insist.” Rainbow Dash wrinkled her nose, slapped on a clothespin, then pulled out a C-clamp and clamped the clothespin tight. She also wrapped a scarf around her face, then added a gas mask on top of that and put on a hazmat suit over everything else.

Durian isn't actually that bad once you taste it. It's actually kind of creamy. Mot much to do about the smell, though.

Diving down, she returned with a heavily-sealed box thick with tape that was slapped with all kinds of warning labels. Pinkie hadn't even opened it yet, and a rank stench like turpentine and sweaty gym socks was already making her cheeks turn green.

“T-thanks,” Pinkie muttered, sounding congested as her tears clogged her sinuses. “That should do it.”

Alas, as the balloons were artificial, they lacked the juicy, succulent taste that made the durian fruit worthwhile, and tasted exactly the way they smelled.

That sounds life-threatening.

Drifting endlessly through space, tumbling though the infinite void nonstop without end, was about as pleasant as it sounded. Everything was effected eventually, dust, asteroids, even the stars. This screaming became internalized, released as tiny fluctuations of light. Stars twinkled. Twilight sparkled.

It's a Twilight Sparkle pun. I have to like it by default.

“I'm out of—” Twilight looked at her bulging castle, creaking and groaning and listing to one side, then straight up at the clear, blue yonder. “—space.” She slapped herself in the face, groaning. “A pun? Really?”

Twilight, welcome to our world.

“ She totally spaced out! ”

:facehoof:

Also, Twilight, You should know better than to break a Pinkie Promise.

“I think Angel Bunny plays that Kerbunny Space Program,” Rainbow said.

Hey, I play Kerbal Space Program! Does anyone else here play it too?

I specialize in creating unusual ships that my imagination comes up with. Flying wings, direct moon ascent rockets, an attempt to match Rainbow Dash, you name it.

9309311
I'm good at making explosions but not much else.

9309406
Rapid Unplanned Disassemblies, you mean?

Really, a double pun setup?

There's a rather peculiar and somewhat contradictory phenomena that happens to space travelers. See, outer space is so vast that it's said to be infinite. If the universe is truly infinite, though, then everything possible should exist somewhere, and anything that can happen will happen. So if something exists, that means it's also possible that this thing could cross paths with the space-goer. Thus, if something can potentially exist, then there's a surprisingly high chance that a pony floating in space will encounter it, even though space itself is mostly empty.

Excuse me, if you're going to quote Alvin Plantinga's ontological argument in your fic, the least you can do is give him credit /s See also: Boltzmann brain

But in all seriousness: Lol. I absolutely loved the pun twists. I will second what 9308416 said — I will be (unpleasantly) surprised if this doesn't make the Featured box within a day!

I Picked up the ending pun in the first few paragraphs but It Was a worthwhile ride to the finish. Kudos

9309309
Thanks for catching that.

My common sense particle, Someone took it
NNNOOO
Oh wait, it died my bad

9309611
While Alvin's postulate doesn't work with currently expected finite nature if universe, similar speculation was made about multiverse. Not sure who did that, but first time I met it in Heinlein's book.

9308368

....the puns. THE pun. sigh.
Well done :moustache:

Obviously, it takes a pun to undone one. :pinkiecrazy:

:facehoof:

I feel obliged to comment.

What?
How did she launched herself into the atmosphere?
My answer:Magic

God dammit,
This was a truly glorious fic

Oh my god. Only Pinkie. Only pinkie could come up with that. And only Pinkie could make it actually work.

9309311
I tried to play that. I couldn't even make the rocket take off. Got tired of fiddling after a while and gave up on it.

She totally spaced out!

Hah hah hah!

Send Twilight back up, because I think my sides are in orbit.

Welp... I feel like I've been pranked. Read the entire story only to realize it was one giant pun. GG, author, GG...

9309914
The game's got a short, good "how to up go" tut to help you with that. Once you know how to up go, the rest is knowing the basic "add more engine and fuel if you don't go far enough, and add more struts if it comes apart too easy."

That's the kind of joke that you tell in public, then someone throws a rock at you and you immediately think 'I deserved that'.

I love it.

9309914
9310435
The problem with sticking more engines and fuel onto a rocket is that those extra parts add extra weight, and that extra weight needs even more engines, and those extra extra engines need even more fuel. Eventually, you fall into a vicious circle of ever-increasing weight until you have a rocket so massive that even if it does fly, attitude control will be a royal pain. Not to mention that it'll be prohibitively expensive in career mode.

Trust me, I've been there. It was pretty frustrating until I scaled way back and found that three stages with an engine each was best for getting to orbit: there's a reason that the game has about three different rocket engines for the same size and brand.

About the only times you'll need the big guns are for launching big parts ― such as space station subassemblies ― into orbit and interplanetary missions. And at those times, you need to keep in mind that there's a fine line between "big enough" and "too big". If it helps, you can always watch Scott Manley's videos on YouTube. Also, you can always use the stock rockets. If even that doesn't work, you're probably doing the "flying" part wrong, in which case it's tutorials on YouTube or the KSP wiki for you if the game tutorial ― as mentioned by Blaster M ― doesn't do it.

By the way, there's one time I used a massive rocket that would most of the time be considered too big: in my direct moon ascent rocket, the only attitude control needed in the atmosphere was pointing straight up ― a job easily taken care of by SAS ― and attitude control in space is easy owing to the lack of air resistance, so mass wasn't a problem.

P.S. As Blaster M mentioned, struts, also known as "space tape" are very useful. In fact, they're a structural necessity if you want to go anywhere more complex than basic three stage rockets.

9309698
You're welcome. :twilightsmile:

Pinkie was mad at Twilight for not paying attention, but then she left. Also I love how this was all just a big pun, at the same time lol :rainbowlaugh:

Palm Palette, I suggest you see about joining the team at Ask Pun Pony.
http://askpun.tumblr.com/

This was a fun one shot. Thank you. I enjoyed it. :twilightsmile:

I see past your ploy. You're using the clever disguise of making a story based off of terrible puns, but you actually just wanted to share that space fact with all the readers.

The puns, the puns, they burns us!

Beyond the moon, the sun, the other plants

You misspelled 'Planet'. You're welcome.

“I, uh...” Twilight looked back up at the clear, blue sky. “It was really space-y. It sure seemed that way.”

“How is that even possible?” Rainbow asked.

“How did you get up there in the first place?” Rarity asked.

“What happened? I'll tell you what happened.” Pinkie jutted a hoof at the purple princess pony. She wrinkled her brow and a deep frown tugged her cheeks down. “Twilight Pinkie-promised that she'd pay rapt attention to Maud's entire poetry rockathon, and then she went ahead and did the one thing that I explicitly told her not to do!”

“Oh, Um... that.” Twilight cringed, scuffed her hooves and looked at the ground. “Sorry.”

“What? What did she do?” Rainbow asked.

She totally spaced out!

:ajbemused: HA!

Good story, by the way. :twilightsmile:

9309406 9309434 9309914 9310435 9310897

“I think Angel Bunny plays that Kerbunny Space Program,” Rainbow said.

"ALWAYS CHECK YO' STAGIN'! And remember -- fly safe."

9310897
I'll keep all that in mind but I don't know if I'll ever get back to KSP. I wasn't expecting something quite as technical as that game when I saw the cute goofy characters and the silly gifs flying about at the time.

“Oh. So that's what a lenderhosen dress feels like,”

lederhosen

After an hours worth of work,

hour

9312326
It's as technical as you want it to be...

...could be Scott Manley...

...or you could be the next danny2462, who weaponises game glitches

You know, I have a friend who detests puns with the undying heat of a thousand suns. I'm pretty sure that if he read this, it would kill him. Well done. Well done indeed. :pinkiecrazy:

I really do not regret giving this fic a shot. It was a blast to read! The pun hurt my friend, so that's a bonus. I featured this on episode 245 of my podcast, Pony 411.

I know this is just meant to be a pun, but I've got to mention the background microwave radiation. It is basically uniform throughout the universe, however, it shouldn't be in such equilibrium, if the visible universe is as big and the maximum age scientists agree upon. Not enough time for it to reach from one end to the other.

Outer space is more than just a vacuum. It's full of the wonders of the cosmos. Nebulas, comets, stars, solar systems, asteroids, galaxies, and everything in the entire universe is technically in outer space. Oh, and Twilight Sparkle was there too.

And that is how to start an good story!

“You mean like, building a rocket ship?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“Are either of you rocket scientists?” Pinkie asked.
“Um, I have no idea how to make a rocket get off the ground, but I'm sure I could make it look fabulous,” Rarity said.
“I think Angel Bunny plays that Kerbunny Space Program,” Rainbow said.

You know, I was actually looking for an good place to make an Kermare Space Program reference... But this is fine, too.


Wait, Twilight is still on her doorstep, right?
What would happen if she decided to open the door?

Obligatory:

This makes a ridiculous amount of sense...pinkie sense....:pinkiegasp:

See the pun?

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