Fluttershy wonders why Twilight and Celestia let her into their relationship, and debates on what she adds to it. After all, they must say "I love you too" for some reason, right?
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Silent Whisper
Joined 23rd Apr, 2017 ·
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Now I have to think of a ship name fir this.
Hmmmmmm...... Twilight X Celestia X Fluttershy.......
Got it!!
Twilestishy
8572634
I'm probably not the first pony to ship it, but maybe I'll write more with them. Thanks for the read!
Love freely. Love always.
& 
& 
Poly angst?
WHY DID YOU NOT TELL US THIS WAS UP?!?!? *glues eyes to tablet*
Memo to self. Krazy Glue burns like
Fluttershy knows how to word things beautifully. Can't wait to see more of them. :)
I do wonder who she's talking to. It seems like me this has been going on for ages and yet is still new to her.
This was both honest and honest to the character. You're really improving and it's wonderful to watch.
Seeing Shy's perspective, I had an image of Celestia counting the days until she can go on a nice trip with Flutters, eagerly planning her disguise, wishing her gardens could keep Shy happy, sometimes walking them to feel a little closer to her gentle love.
That was adorable!
Twilight
Celestia 
Me. Oh, darn. Autocorrect is acting up again.
Oh wow... this was adorable. I neeeed more of this trio!
Holy fucking cuteness
https://www.fimfiction.net/group/211585/reviewers-cafe/thread/308771/reviews?page=7#comment/6271934
While it's not a bad fic, a positive review from Reviewer's Cafe pushed me to write this.
Grammar is rather good. The rest... Eugh. I am far from the whole polyamory thing, but after the positive review I expected this would help me understand it. What I got was an endless wave of emotions (an excessive wave of emotions or, more accurately, one emotion) and very few meaningful thoughts behind it. Not much background. How did the heroes get there? How does it feel like? What ups and downs do they have? How did they propose? Do they hang out together? There are bits of it here and there, but the recurrent "I love them, oh god how I love them, l love them so much, I'm so lucky to love them" overshadows any such attempts to give the story more depth than that.
Another point, Flutters is not usually a very sociable pony. While I can't say she doesn't do speeches (especially after taking confidence training), it's probably safe to say she doesn't do monologues. Especially monologues of this size. Thus it takes considerable effort to follow the chosen form (almost uninterrupted Fluttershy's monologue) while keeping Flutts in character.
One of the goals for any author is to sell the story, to paint a convincing picture and provoke empathy. After reading "Self-Insert", sadly, I'm tempted to cry out loud, "Do not believe".
8661375
>not understanding the difference between internal monologue and speechmaking
u wot, m8
8661546
As far as I understand it's (mostly) a monologue directed to a random guest of Fluttershy. Tea is mentioned. If part of it is inner monologue, the border between the two is very unclear.
And even if it is inner monologue, in my opinion it is still very... lengthy for somepony like Fluttershy.
8661375
I'm curious. Does a positive review invite ponies like you to nitpick for negative things? I don't mind criticism or negative feedback so long as it's helpful, but I can't tell how to make it better from what you said. This fic is not intended to be a perfect explanation of a poly relationship, only my understanding of one.
As to your comment about fluttershy's characterization, I don't think pinkie would get high on drugs, lose all her friends, become Big Brother, and die in a nuclear explosion, but fanfiction often interprets characters differently. I'm terribly sorry you don't agree with mine.
And I'm also sorry you don't believe the fic. I'll alert my real-life "Twilight and Celestia", and we'll see if they have any advice to make it better. I appreciate your comments.
8663797
Sorry if you saw it only as "nitpicking". I did something wrong then. It was not my intention.
Just thought I'd say what's on my mind after reading this. I've read Self-Insert right after P-Berry's fics about Delta Vee, and while they are not about poly relationship, they are about romantic relationship, and in contrast to your work I found them... captivating.
While I can't point out what's wrong better than I already did, it just may be not my cup of tea. Take it for what it is: another opinion on the internet. Don't let it stop you :)
I really can't put into words how much I relate to Fluttershy in this story. This was fantastic.
That second ampersand means the right hoof-side of your "and" boolean expression will not execute if the left-hoof side is false, which not only is more efficient, but also allows you to guard against the potential side effects of function calls on the rhs (such as a null pointer exception, an undesired increment, or undefined behavior if the lhs is part of a precondition for a function on the rhs).
Happy to help.
11008273
The fact that you're right is making me crack up. Wonder what this means for my relationship?