Thorax the Red-Nosed Bughorse (and Other Hearth's Warming Carols)

by Trick Question

The EQG Song

(sung to "The Christmas Song", a.k.a. "Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire")

Sung by me, a capella, in a single take with no audio editing. Don't expect quality.

Human ponies sound so very neat
Hasbro must have seen our art
But all the characters go to high school?
That... does not seem very smart

Everypony knows...
That marketing calls all the shots
They just want to sell some dolls
With every movie skin gets more Caucasian
We still watch? They've got us by the balls

​ ​ ​ ​ ​ Oh Sunset Shimmer, please come back...
​ ​ ​ ​ ​ Why'd they replace you with that pink and purple hack?
​ ​ ​ ​ ​ Our hope is fading, and we're ignored
​ ​ ​ ​ ​ I only hope the jerks aren't going to ruin Discord

Strange land where nopony seems to age
E'en the Dazzlings, eons old
Although each new movie's much worse than the last,
Hasbro's rolling... in gold

Oh...!
Although each new movie's much worse than the last,
Hasbro's rolling...
​ ​ ​ ​ ​ In.....
​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ Gold........!

Comments

[Hillbe]

shameless simply shameless
Shall I burn it with fire?
Myself NO! I don't need any junk mail my little dragon!
Spikey's MINE!
IT WAS JUST A FIGURE OF SPEECH!
STUPID BITCH HORSE!
I heard that

[PonyDragon]

What did I just read?!
...

(I stole them from Bad Horse. Don't tell him or I'll end up with more.)

Bad Horse! Quick! Look here!

Suggestion:
Link the instrumental versions of the of the respective song inside the chapter. Makes it easier if someone don't know every song.

Other than that: Interesting concept, well done.
Have an upvote.

[EverfreePony]

Oh deer...
these are hilarious! Though especially Shipping Times got me
If someone sings this then let me know, let me know, let me know...

[M4Tiger4014]

I got a good feeling about this...

[M4Tiger4014]

After Reading: My god this was hilarious!!!

[Trick Question]

7752429
I had so much fun writing all of this, despite rarely venturing into comedy.

There's something wrong with me... but that's okay.

[wiccanminnesota]

Wow that was.....yeah I can't even say what that was....just wow!

[shinigamisparda]

Oh this was all great. It also reminds me that I don't know every Christmas Carol by heart.

Huh... maybe I should record myself singing some of these? I've been told I've got a pretty good singing voice.

[Foxhelm]

Sugarcube, you love all the EQG moives,

[Ugly-Duckling123]

I request you do one for 'Frosty the Snowman'

Please...

[Trick Question]

7753026
I wish I'd put it in the contest too, just so everypony would have to read it!

[Trick Question]

7753641
From best to worst, I'd rank them 2 (RR), 1 (original), 3 (Games), 4 (camping?). I can't remember any songs from the last two, and I can't even remember the plot of the last one (or any interesting new characters).

[Trick Question]

7753827
The reason everypony likes Shipping Times the best is you're all a bunch of horrible perverts.

[Trick Question]

7752582
I like 'em okay! This is satire.

[Foxhelm]

7754996 you have sucessfully countertrolled me

Or have you

[Czar_Yoshi]

I'm sure this was a blast to write, but wow, a lot of them sound really salty. Might need a few more nudge-nudge-wink-winks, or some humor coming from the opposite end of the spectrum? (The shipping one was great.)

[Trick Question]

7755448
Yeah, it's definitely meant to be taken as satire rather than seriously. I'm not sure how to keep ponies from taking it the wrong way other than adding another warning on the tin.

[Novalis14]

Okay at first I was expect a rage fic with no real quality but you had me laughing at everyone of them even the few I disagreed with. You did this tactfully, cleverly, and creatively and it is amazing. You also have a good singing voice which just made the whole thing. Thank you for making this fic the way you did.

[Trick Question]

7758441
Yay! I'm glad you were able to enjoy it.

[M4Tiger4014]

Last song was questionable quality, but the rest were pretty good, especially a cappella, that's not easy. Edit in music for a second recording if you want, and I'd bookmark that shit.

[Trick Question]

7760173
Aww!

[Misty Spell]

I only hope the jerks aren't going to ruin Discord

Here's hoping!

Man, I say this unironically, I really enjoy your singing.

[CoffeeMinion]

I liked the singing on this one very much. That's gotta be a tough one to sing and I didn't hear any flubbed notes!

[Trick Question]

7765830
OTP?

[Trick Question]

7756247
Shipping can be done well. I'd like to think my fic The Clarity of Darkness does TwiJack right. It's not popular, but it's one of my personal faves.

Broken Symmetry is a much longer shipfic with a sci-fi/mystery bent. It's a little emotionally overwrought, but well-liked. It's a Moonlight fic (Moondancer and Twilight).

[Neal Wolf]

No joke: halfway through reading this, my daughter came in and asked when I changed from a wolf to a hyena

[FanOfMostEverything]

Amusing all around, though I feel I should note that we did see the Cake twins after Flurry Heart. And they still have the same eyes as in Season 2.

[Trick Question]

7883144
The "oh" is pre-verse.

[Kikio3000]

Why is the categorized as sex?

[Trick Question]

8534793
Shipping Times refers to orgies, incest, etc.

[Kikio3000]

8534862
Oh! Oh gosh, I didn't know! Thanks for telling me! I'm a pure person! XD :P

[keybounce]

I like the first 2 best.

But, then I lost it on Shipping Times, Horse Thoughtcrime, ...