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Trixie Lulamoon is many things; a notable stage magician, an illustrious dictator, and now, detective for hire. Assisting the Canterlot Police Department whenever they call upon her, join Trixie's adventures as she solves impossible cases and apprehends despicable villains.
Twilight's along for the ride too... Mainly to ensure that Trixie doesn't end up arrested or dead.
Inspired by PixelKitties' Trixie - Consulting Unicorn comics, and Sherlock Holmes.
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Could use further editing — chief among them a number of typoes probably caused by bad spell-check/autocorrect. For example:
> The Reminisces
Reminiscences
> the stallion effectively deflated upon herring the news
hearing
> as Trixie sort shelter
sought
> We all become fatigued from excursion
exertion
> She monitored towards the water tank
motioned
However, this was surprisingly entertaining considering the rough edges of the prose. The dialogue in particular is full of wit, and there's some clear originality in the Equestrian adaptation of things like the underwater spellcasting, and the things that are borrowed from Sherlock Holmes, well, were cool things to begin with so it's good that you kept them.
You've got my track. You've established cool characters and an intriguing mystery; let's see where you take it.
This world needs more Trixie Holmes.
That is such a very Sherlock Holmes thing to say...
ruse, not rouse
Can only say one thing, I totally love it the entire concept and I hope to see more of it pretty soon.
Well, gang - looks like we have another mystery to solve!
I am intrigued.
It's Murder, he says!
This is excellent. Trixie is definitely the kind of pony to be the eccentric detective, with Twilight as the more grounded foil - the Watson to Trixie's Sherlock, but without having to drag those specific characters into the story. They feel very in character as themselves, too, and their dialogue is golden.
The whole setup and the specific mystery is definitely intriguing. Definitely serious without being too grimdark.
The only writing flaw I can spot are comma splices here and there. Spelling is fine.
I'll definitely look forward to the next chapter!
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Thanks for the help with the spelling and pointers on the grammar. Feedback is greatly appreciated.
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Next chapter almost finished, thanks for the comments!
Well. Seeing as how holmes was addicted to cocaine and morphine to escape the boring commonality of life i would think trixie is a user of the equastrian equivalent? Like breezie dust or manticore venom or something like that...
Wow, did not expect this to be wrapped up in one go.
Definitely not show appropriate, but I was enthralled the whole way. It's fun to see a platonic relationship between Trixie and Twilight grow like this, bouncing off each other in interesting ways. Trixie comes across as a little too perceptive, but that's also part of what makes this fun to read. It's just an untapped talent of hers!
The next question is, who gets royalty rights for the book?
Poor Flash, though. Whatever did he do?
I will certainly look forward to more!
Brilliant, simply brilliant!
Well this was an enjoyment. I hope to read more in the future about The great and powerful detective. It would be interesting for a future if Trixie would be asked by Twilight to come to ponyvile to help her friend whom she believed (and rightly so) being wrongly accused for murder. Just food for thoughts. By expending this version Trixie with interaction between all the members of the main six rather then just Twilight.
An excellent conclusion to an excellent story. Solid logic in the deductions, and the readers had a fair amount of clues to deduce things along the way. Definitely interesting characterizations as well. The only negative mark I can give is the grammar; there's an overabundance of comma splices.
All said, a very enjoyable read. I look forward to future continuations.
7027432
No comment... But Trixie was quite bored by the end.
7027693
Platonic Trixie and Twilight, to me at least, just feels more natural, romance isn't exactly a speciality of mine. Your questions though will undoubtedly by answered in time, and Trixie's seemingly random ability to deduct will be partially addressed also.
7028821
Trixie might be heading to Ponyville sooner than you think!
7045020
Commas I've found are literally the bane of my existence. Thank you though for the feedback and comment.
Thanks to you all for your support. Next chapter is on the way!
Oh man, that 18,000-word chapter.
I've been trying to sneak this into my schedule for like two weeks and keep not having 45 minutes free all at once.
I don't regret the time spent, and good on you for posting a completed arc all at once, but you might want to consider in the future splitting it up into smaller chunks (e.g. parts 1, 2, and 3). As a bonus, that also would let you space out the chunks by a day or two to create cliffhangers and stimulate discussion.
7048553 The first and second chapters were originally one long chapter put together, but I split them up for precisely that reason, I just wanted to get the introduction and premise set up and future chapters will either be shorter since they won't need as much set up, or will be split as they will start to be part of a larger serial story. I just didn't feel like there was an appropriate enough point in Damsel to cut it off, and I felt like it would destroy any sense of urgency somewhat. Will keep it in mind in future though, thanks.
7084385 More is coming!
Eventually
I am the fiftieth like.
I am not sorry.
Mmm yes. Very solid story.
11/10
This is awesome! Really captures the feel of Holmes without losing the feel of Trixie.
This story very intriguing I wonder where this is going.
I can feel the Doylian influences radiating through the screen! With ponies! Two great things.
Great use of alliteration. I approve.
This... was pretty damned entertaining. Kept both Trixie and Twilight in character while still being reminiscent of Holmes and Watson. Also, kudos on crafting an interesting and believable mystery.
I don't know if you still plan on making more stories in this continuity. I hope you do, but even if you don't, you've done a mighty fine job.
Thanks.
This was an exceptionally fun story. It's not a premise that I would have expected, but it is one that works oddly well. I hope you write a sequel.
Super Detectives Twilight and Trixie!
God i love this story.
I'd had loved a series of these two solving simple robberies to ancient mysterys.
Heavy on the Holmes.
This was fun read. Twilight and Trixie has that perfect chemistry if done right and done right you did! I'm really looking forward for your next work if you feel like doing it. Great job!
You can has review!
This was such a great fic. As a huge fan of Sherlock Holmes, I consumed every part of this with relish.