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Baal Bunny


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As far as Fashionably Late is concerned, the Azdariz Diamond is just another jewel her husband Filthy Rich has bought for her. So when she loses it, she confides in Rarity that she'll be putting an announcement in the paper: whoever finds the diamond can keep it. To Rarity, however, the Azdariz is the finest gemstone ever produced in Equestria, and she's determined to keep it from falling into less appreciative hoofs. Donning the Mare-Do-Well suit, Rarity slips into Ponyville's midnight shadows to track the diamond down before the announcement gets published.

Then Rainbow Dash gets involved. Then things get complicated.

This story was awarded 6th place in the April 2015 Writeoff Association contest, "Great Expectations," and the cover art was commissioned from marking.

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 77 )

This was a fine story. It's always nice when authors show that for all her faults Rainbow isn't stupid.

Also Fashionably Late is a great pony name.

Just saying the name forced Rarity to stifle another shiver. For while she'd worked with larger gems, none, she was convinced, could hold the proverbial candle to the Azdariz. That she'd been allowed to touch the diamond during Ms. Late's previous fitting session, had been allowed to caress it with her magic and soak herself in the dazzling prismatic reflections and refractions from its surface—

Suffice it to say that the sensations had featured quite prominently in her dreams during the course of the last week.

Are you absolutely sure this shouldn't be listed as "Mature - Jewelry" on FIMfiction, BB? :duck:

"Half of one, six dozen of the other." Tossing her mane, Rainbow drifted upward again, her wings a blur. "Either we're fighting jewel thieves, or we're hunting for ancient treasure. Hey, and if we're lucky, maybe we'll getta do both!"

Rainbow Dash has the correct adventurer's attitude. :rainbowdetermined2:

Oh yeah, Spike... Now there's a potential suspect for this! :moustache:

Unexpected, but awesome, ending. For all the adventurous silliness, the struggle between Rarity's greed and generosity, her love of beauty and desire to have that beauty, was the real action scene of this story. :derpytongue2:

Nice story. It felt like an episode. Well done, have a fav!

Very good job

Rainbow dash is part hound?

5951586

For Rarity:

Gemstones are an emotional experience. :eeyup:

Mike

5952295

Rainbow Dash knows:

The Rainbow Dash nose.

:facehoof:

Sorry,
Mike

5951602

A co-worker of mine:

Always said "half of one, six dozen of the other" instead of the actual "six of one, half a dozen of the other," and I've always wanted to work it into a story somewhere. And now I have! :pinkiehappy:

Mike

5951614

No, no:

This is all going on way past his bedtime. :scootangel:

Mike

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Thanks, folks!

This is a story I've been wanting to write for over a year now, but it was only the impetus of The Writeoff that actually got me putting fingertips to keyboard. Now I can move on to not writing the story I've been wanting to write for a mere 10 months!

Mike

You know something, it's really nice to see a story where Rainbow admonishes Rarity instead. I mean it makes sense and I'm not saying people shouldn't do it, but it gets old.

Really nice read, good work.

I suppose that even in a world where EarthPonies (Raging Mouse uses the adjective "Earthen" and lets ponies be understood) can grow rocks, gems, jewels, et cetera in the ground, extraordinary specimens are still extraordinary.

Jewel-bearings are a great invention of the 18th century. Without lubrication such as oil, the motion (the technical collective term for all of the moving parts) would grind to an halt. Lubrication would allow the parts to move, but oil plus dust equals gunk, which would cause the motion to grind to an halt. Corundum (aluminum oxide, in the form of rubies sapphires, and other forms of aluminum oxide) has an extremely low coefficient of friction. If one grinds corundum into the form of sockets for bearing and the pegs forthe bearings themselves, one can create lubricationless bearings which work.

According to Lauren Faust, ponies poop into the ground, thus fertilizing the flowers. In the song "A Glass of Water", we see the toilet of Bon Bon and Lyra Heartstrings, which contradicts the statement of Lauren Faust. This story implies that ponies not just have toilets, but that Ponyville has sewers.

That was pretty solidly great. Good story, Bunny, it was a delight to read.

Well, congratulations on hitting all the right parts of a ridiculous madcap chase movie without the ridiculous madcap chase movie.

5956157

Now I'm seeing:

Booths at the county fair where earth ponies are displaying the best gems from their gardens like folks in our world do with zucchini...

Mike

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When I was taking:

Physics in high school more than three decades ago, I always referred to it as the "the koi fish of friction" in my notes and then would draw a little smiling fish next to it. I'm thinking this might have something to do with my eventually becoming a Humanities major...

Mike

5954206

Thanks! It's always fun exploring the "other sides" of characters.

5956322

And there's the outhouse scene in "The Last Roundup," too. I think it was Present Perfect who wrote a minific Ponyizing the way that horses in our world poop 15 or 20 times a day, so, yeah, any and all varieties of bathroom facilities, I would think, would be essential to maintaining Equestrian society. :scootangel:

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Thanks, folks. Now I'm imagining a Pony version of "It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World"--or did I leave out a "Mad" in there? It's been a while since I saw that movie... :twilightblush:

Mike

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Earth and Sky is credit to ridiculous madcap chase movie team.

Well, the last half of it is, anyway.

"Adjust your albedo" is a fantastic pegasus-ism. :rainbowkiss:

Hm. I think that, to me, this works better as a single story than as five chapters; the sources of tension that drive the chapter breaks are very different than the tension that drives the full plot arc, so the story would feel a little more unified if it all wound up for one big pitch at the end. Regardless, it was a fun read in the Writeoff and I like the additions!

I love your portrayal of Rarity here. That opening scene was the first thing to make me laugh out loud in a long while.

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That was bad and you should feel bad. But this story is good, and that cancels it out.

This'll be fun.

Good stuff, Mike. Was a good end to a funny story. I was expecting more shenanigans, but the Rarity/Dashie interactions filled in that hole, and the down-to-earth ending rounded out a realistic finish that satisfied in a different way.

Keep on writin', you!

5959087

Thanks!

Putting this story together, I found that Rarity here wanted a narrative voice from the Douglas Adams/Terry Pratchett school. So I gave it my best shot!

Mike

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Writing Dash here:

Made me really wanna get back to the next "Clandestine Corps" story. Ah, so much time, so little to do!

Wait. Reverse that. Thank you.

Mike

5959026

Yeah, they're more:

Act breaks than chapter breaks. Oh, well... :twilightoops:

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Thanks again!

I'm hip deep in consolidating all my magical squirrel stories into a single novel right now, but I hope to have that done by mid-summer so I can get back to Pony stuff!

Mike

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Rarity had to quit judging those after the third time a pony tried to show her a topaz with a particularly amusing shape... :raritydespair:

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Aah, the sweet scent of learning. :twilightsmile:

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I think this might tie in:

To the now corrected typo at the beginning of this chapter where I referred to the Carrousel Boutique as "the Carousal Boutique." :facehoof:

Mike

"Not the sorta thing I'd, y'know, leave my friends and family and business and life behind to go chasing after, sure, but yeah, it's pretty enough."

She didn't, though. :rainbowhuh: Up until this point, Rainbow's the only one who's gotten carried away, turning an ordinary lost-item search into a treasure expedition. The only hint that Rarity might be blowing things out of proportion comes later, and IMO feels a little shoehorned in.

FWIW, the life of a gentlemare thief would represents probably the obvious career of the alternate evil Mirror Universe Rarity.

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Oh, well:

Not every story works for every reader.

5977663

In An Infinite Number of Pinkies:

A story I wrote under my other pseudonym, Pinkie Pie at one point meets Modesty Pink, her gentlemare thief twin from a mirror universe. So yeah, I'm all for that!

Mike

:derpytongue2: Rarity I lost the diamond .
:raritystarry: Oh ? Where did you think you lost it?
:derpyderp2: Twilights castle.
:raritywink: I'm sure Twilight will find it.
:twilightsheepish: Why yes Spike found it!
:raritystarry::derpyderp2:
:raritydespair: Spike don't tell me you ate that diamond. . .
:moustache: OK I wont.
:raritydespair::derpyderp1:
:moustache: Shony doesn't want it back anyway. . .
:raritystarry: How do you Mrs. Lates nickname ?
:moustache: I did live in Canterlot. . .remember?
:raritycry: So you ate it?
:moustache: No I didn't tell you ,It's right here. . .:derpytongue2::raritystarry::twilightoops::rainbowlaugh:

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And they all:

Lived happily ever after! :pinkiehappy:

Mike

5978495 A story well done :raritywink::rainbowlaugh:

Not bad. Not bad at all. (I didn't find any spelling errors!) :twilightsmile:

Glancing from side to side and pricking her ears

I had no idea that pricking had another definition other than 'pierce slightly.' Cool.

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English is:

A fun language. :scootangel:

Mike

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Thanks!

I'm still chuckling over the way I had "Carousal Boutique" at the beginning of the story till Present Perfect pointed it out to me a few days ago. It makes me want to write an Alternate Universe story where Rarity has Pinkie's job, and the Carousal Boutique is the giant funhouse she runs in town. :raritystarry:

Mike

5952367 Just a quick nitpick on the way you comment, you're using incorrect grammar when you do this

A person somewhere:

Went to the movies.

It's no big deal and may just be how you organize things or something but I can hardly ever resist nit picking.

5952295 I imagine that Rarity would be pretty easy to smell, what with all the perfume and other cosmetics she would apply to herself, probably anyone who spent enough time with her would be able to recognize the scent of what she puts on herself every day, at the very least.

I love the narrative voice you use in the story. It fits Rarity quite nicely. Good work!

What a thoughtful story. Great job on this, it was fun to read!

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