• Member Since 1st Nov, 2013
  • offline last seen September 3rd

Topaz Moon

The pony alchemist


Humanity is finally reaching out beyond the solar system in search of habitable planets. A disaster aboard the SSC Quasar causes the crew to abandon it, fleeing in the escape ships. Now, after years in stasis, the escape ships crash on an unknown world.

Lieutenant Cassandra Campbell's plans were simple: find the other crashed ships, search for survivors, and try to find a way to get a distress signal back to Earth in hopes of a rescue. Not long after her arrival, one of the consoles in her ship starts flashing ‘Protocol D’ in large, red letters. Now she has to figure out what it means, while trying to cooperate with the local citizens.

****** Extremely long hiatus, possibly permanently. ******

Editing: Level Dasher : Chapters 1 - 14
Pre-reading/Editing: Admiral Biscuit : Chapter 12 - 14
Pre-reading Busstop : Chapters 10 - 13

(R1) = Updated April 07, 2015. A Slight revision and re-editing of previously posted chapters. See blog for details. (A re-read is not required)

Thank you so very much to all who have helped me with my story. :twilightsmile:

Old Coverart by xxMarkingxx

Chapters (14)
Comments ( 529 )

Interesting take on Pony lack of nudity taboo - a natural, instinctive magic that covers up the genitals when not "in use" :)

Now, after years in stasis, the escape ships crash on an unknown world.

:ajbemused: Please tell me this isn't another Planet of the Apes-esque fic.

Nope, it is not Earth in any way, shape, or form. Stasis in this story is used for parts of long distance space travel. It is brought up a little more in chapter 2, so I do not want to go into much detail on it though.

Whew. You have no idea how many stories I've seen ruined by that "twist".

Please don't turn this into a romance. There's too much potential to ruin with love drama.
Other than that, this is good, keep up the good work.

My only criticism is that you made the ponies in this story too large.


Fire Level Dasher, he let you get away with not using a proper… ellipses.

Either that, or he has to start on you with the cattle prod. :rainbowlaugh:


Ah saw the flair an’ came over straight away. What's the problem?

It's a flare, not a flair. Rarity does things with flair, where Twilight might throw up a magical flare.

Seriously, Level Dasher. Fire him. LOL!

(:heart: you Dashie, really!)

4423231 You of all people know I edit late at night. Sue me if I miss ONE. :ajbemused:
I take responsibility for 'flair', but I can't help the ellipses if the text transfer to FimFic doesn't work.
FYI, I tend to not take out the cattle prod until the second or third chapter. First chapter is where we work out the most common mistakes and I correct you. If you repeat the same mistakes after that, you get the prod. :pinkiecrazy:
You just so happen to need the prod consistently because we're on story I-don't-know-how-many and you still keep doing the same s*** over and over again. I'm surprised there isn't the smell of burnt flesh in your house. :rainbowwild:
See you next editing session! *bzzt* :heart:

Sorry, Topaz. A little editor-author ragging going on here. That might be you by the time we're done. :rainbowlaugh:

Cattle prods are no joke! Those hurt like hell. :fluttercry:

I fixed the wrong word, thanks. :yay: for random unsecured wifi from a house near the highway while sitting in a traffic jam. I could have sworn i had that as flare in my word doc, guess I will have to check and see where it went wrong when I get home.

It is all good. I just hope I get to bug you on chapter 2 editing soon. Depending on my new retarded as hell work.

...You just randomly killed of a character.

I'm out.

:rainbowlaugh: oops, see that's what you are supposed to fix. Though not sure why when I went to fix that, and the next three chapter placeholders which all showed the wrong spelling, were correct when I hit edit to fix them all. So I just resaved them and they are all good now. Sorry. :twilightblush:

Sorry, they had the wrong color shirts. :twilightsmile:

4472381 No, YOU type in the chapter names on the site. I can't do anything about that. Don't try to pass the buck on that one. :trixieshiftright:

See, topaz, I told you some dick would mention it :raritywink:

Well a good chapter, keep going

Here lies Discord. The best troll in all of Equestria. Killed by a spaceship. :ajsleepy:

Maybe its a personal headcanon or maybe its just pure bitching, but it always throws me way off when ponies have pretty advanced technology in seemingly random fields, yet no other indications that they're even close to that level of technology; in this case it was the fact that metal pins were a fairly common medical practice. And the general understanding of surgery in general. And the X-ray stuff. I mean yeah I know its canon for ponies to have that kind of a hospital and the X-rays and stuff, but it still bugs me a lot.

Past the ranting, I did find the chapter pretty enjoyable. Though I will criticize the odd addition of the magical resistance. From what you've said its not strong enough to really affect anything, so it just seems like a very unnecessary addition or an attempt to 'balance' ponies and humans perhaps.

Yeah, pony tech in the show is all over the place. For the metal surgical pins I did mention it was mainly other races that used them, with medical ponies rarely using them. In my headcanon it's something that Minotaurs and Griffons would have developed due to lack of healing magic.

The magic resistance she has does have a small role later in the story. All I will say about the MR she has is; if a spell is used on a target and the caster assumes it has the same resistance as a pony, they would power the spell accordingly.

So your human is less bulky than a pony.

Still would be stronger, and more enduring. That's just how humans are built. Maybe a human this size would be weaker than an Earth pony (thanks to their natural magic), but no way in hell a pony (unicorn or pegasus) would be able to physically out power her, since she's apparently in shape.

I take it you are referring to the line, However, muscle and bone density is not anywhere close to that of a pony.

If that is the case, that is to mean she is not as overall durable as the ponies without some injuries. A few examples are; she won't to be able to fall out of the sky like RD and hit a tree or wall, then walk away after shaking her head. Or, crashing into the ground and making a trench with her face and walking away unscathed.

Strength wise, Cassie is more athletically toned than muscular. In a hand to hoof fight, some times she would win, sometimes she would lose depending on the pony.

Kozlov on the other hand would win most hand to hoof fights with the ponies.

Poor Twilight! She has a lot to learn about leadership.
"So you have no idea what it is, though?" Twilight asked.
It took me a while to learn this--but "Don't ask them to identify the problem, ask them to describe what they saw." Seeing Twilight making the same mistakes adds a nice touch to her growing into her role.

I'd mention her little error is having Applejack run from Sweet Apple Acres to the library where she was, so they could both go back to Sweet Apple Acres... But that's sort of excused by Twilight not knowing the others of the "Mane 6" were unavailable. Life can be like that.

There's an old story that a fit human can eventually catch up with a full-size horse, mainly because the human bipedal stride uses less energy for the distance traveled. More "fuel efficient" so to speak. We also have the advantage of being able to carry food and water with us instead of having to graze on low-energy forage. In Cassie's case, I'd guess that equation is altered by the ponies carrying packs, and by her prosthetic leg, and whatever powers it..?
Anyway, I'm enjoying your story, even if it is just a bit tragic so far.

I await moar with great anticipation.

I can't wait to see how they react when the realize she's an alien

MMMMmmm, Now it's getting good... Glad she didn't meet pinkie yet. That would have been ugly, with a capital "U".:pinkiecrazy:

4874347 That is part of what was cut out and moved to part 2.

4874365 Ooh Boy... Cover all the fans! Cuz shit gon hit de fan!:yay::trollestia::moustache::moustache:

I like this,can I have some more please:fluttershysad:

4876592 There will be more for you, and everyone else that has enjoyed the story so far. Of the next four chapters, 14,185 words are already written. Though, they are all uncompleted, and will most likely have huge amounts of changes by the time I finalize them all. :twilightsheepish:

But, none of that matters. Chapter 5 is the one that comes next. I am happy to report is it coming along nicely. :twilightsmile: I am not sure when I will have it all done, real life stuff and all, but I can guarantee it will not take a month, like the last update.

First time I see a HiE where the human is afraid of equines. I will keep watching

I want to read this, but... based on the description the main character doesn't know (wasn't told) what some protocol means... WHY WOULD THEY MAKE SOME IMPORTANT PROTOCAL IF THE ONLY ONE WHO IS INFORMED OF IT'S ACTIVATION DOESN'T KNOW WTF IT DOES!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!???

Sorry, just had to get that out of my system.

SO, is the lack of knowledge a plot hole that you've just rolled with and are trying to make it work or is it a plot device?


I imediatelly thought of Cambell's various soups...

4975232 It is as intended. Cassie is a lower ranking officer, and does not have the need to know, or authorization to know, for all things. The primary ship had a crew compliment of just over 50 people.

4976877 Okay, makes sense now.

I'll read this some time

There's not enough stories where Pinkie gets punched in the face for surprising the Human so Im glad you did it I enjoyed that.

Pinkie had that coming.:pinkiecrazy:no offense,Pinkie

Pinkie, love ya, but this was going to happen eventually, so better a human than something that could actually do some damage to you.

Now Cassie is aware that she was not rescued, and she got to meet two new friends. Pinkie Pie and especially Thunderlane are happy to have made her acquaintance.

Oh Topaz, you silly joker :rainbowlaugh:

I'd absolutely love to help you edit. I'm an editor myself, and this story has me quite intrigued. Really liking where the story is going, rather than the usual HiE wish fulfillment.

Today, Chapter 3 was edited. Grammar was the only thing that changed other than one little section.
The section with Kozlov near the end has been expanded to my orginal plan for it. The over all happenings in it are the same, only the way it is presented has changed.

thanks for having pinkie get punched for surprising her, I like her character just a bit to exuberant sometimes.

So after seeing her ship I hope they realize she's an alien and not an animal why they were dumb enough to think she was one in the first place is beyond me.

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