Epilogue: Stupid Golden Harvest
Epilogue
Stupid Golden Harvest
*-*-*
Minuette was not too complicated of a pony. Some things made her happy, and some things did not make her happy. Floss, floss made Minuette happy. She liked floss, unless it was the kind with the waxy film on it that just made a mess when she used it. Cavities did not make Minuette happy. Well, except for the fact that without cavities, she wouldn't have a job. Having a job made her happy, so maybe cavities indirectly made her happy, but when facing them directly, not happy. Okay, so perhaps there were some things that were not completely cut and dry in terms of whether they made Minuette happy or not.
But the one thing that would unambiguously, definitely make Minuette happy right now was if her best friend Golden Harvest were more than a friend. ...Of a friend. More of a friend. It would make her happy if Golden Harvest were more of a friend than she was being.
Because Golden Harvest was being a terrible friend. She knew she was supposed to be here to get her teeth cleaned at two fifteen today, but here she was strolling in twenty nine whole seconds late! Who sets up an appointment with her dentist friend, and then shows up late to it? Not a very good friend, that's who.
And how was Minuette supposed to work on Golden Harvest's teeth when she kept babbling on and on about how great her neighbor was? Sure, Minuette didn't quite have her equipment set up yet, so talking wasn't exactly prohibited, but... but if Golden Harvest practiced not talking now, she could do better at it when there were dentist tools in her mouth. A good friend would have thought of that.
“...and it still stings a little, I guess, but I get where she's coming from, you know?” Golden Harvest said, settling into the reclining chair. “But she really is a class act. I mean, how many ponies out there will really take the time to let you down gently like that? Celestia, I've got so much respect for that mare! Going out there, doing the things she does, and still taking the time to be a dependable friend for anypony who needs it... I think Applejack is—”
“Golden, I need you to please shut your mouth.” Minuette lit her horn, then paused, blinking. “Er, uh, open your mouth, that is. We're ready to begin.”
“Oh. Okay.” Golden Harvest opened her mouth wide, and Minuette got started.
Or she tried to get started, anyway. Golden Harvest knew this appointment was coming this week, yet she still had to go and get that distracting manecut just a few days before. Minuette was just trying to do her job here, but that bold orange stripe with the cute, slightly coltish tuft at the crest kept drawing her attention. A manestyle that striking just wasn't fair.
Minuette knew how to be a good friend. A good friend didn't show up late to an appointment with a distractingly cute manecut. No, a good friend wanted her friends to succeed. That was why she had sent off the paperwork to the board of orthodontia so that she could officially endorse Golden Harvest's carrot juice. That's right, Golden Harvest's juice was going to be dentist-approved, because Minuette was a good friend. She'd been meaning to send off that paperwork for a while, and the fact that she got around to it the same day Golden Harvest had kissed her was a silly coincidence, nothing more.
That kiss. Talk about rude. If Golden Harvest had wanted to kiss her, she could have just asked. Minuette would have said yes. Not that she wanted a kiss from her, mind, but because she was just that good a friend. Kissing a friend to help her figure out if she was a lesbian or not was one of the major duties of a good friend. Minuette was pretty sure that was written down somewhere.
Golden Harvest would definitely have to ask next time. You know, if she wanted to be double-sure she was a lesbian. A pony could never be too sure. But she would need to ask next time, or else Minuette might not let her kiss her.
Okay, she probably still would, because she was a good friend. That was the reason Minuette was staring at Golden Harvest's lips right now and imagining herself kissing them. She was practicing being a good friend. She wasn't into mares. Or maybe she was, Minuette wasn't sure. She was terrible at guessing this sort of thing with other ponies, so why should she be any better at guessing it for herself?
But what Minuette did know was that she wasn't best-friend-sexual. She was definitely not crushing hard on Golden Harvest. She was not falling into the deep pools of light in her green eyes. She was not slowly melting on the inside as she listened to her friend's soft breaths.
“Um, Colgate?” Golden Harvest said. There she went again, talking while Minuette was trying to work on her teeth. She had no sense of dental etiquette. “I thought you said we were starting.”
“We are,” Minuette said, lifting a plaque-scraper in her magic. “And it's Minuette.” Golden Harvest kept doing that. She kept using her nickname, the one Minuette kept telling her not to use. She wished she wouldn't do that. It was very distracting. Something about it made her imagine Golden Harvest moaning, 'Colgate... ohh, Colgate!' It was likely the tone of voice she said it in. She didn't say it any differently from how she said anything else, but Golden Harvest's whole voice was distracting today. Minuette wished she would just stop talking and let her do her job.
She had stopped talking, of course. Minuette examined Golden Harvest's teeth, and they were terrible. Actually, they weren't that bad. Quite immaculate, really, compared to most of Minuette's patients. Golden Harvest actually listened to her when she said to brush twice a day and floss regularly. So few ponies did.
Why did she have to have such wonderful teeth? No cavities, healthy gums, only a tiny amount of plaque. Barely enough plaque to even justify using a scraper at all. Why, Minuette imagined she could do Golden Harvest's teeth-cleaning with only her tongue!
...But that would be weird, so she didn't do that.
She took the scraper and carefully, gently removed the plaque from Golden Harvest's teeth. It didn't take very long, which was good, because Minuette wasn't sure how long she could block out all the distractions, what with her manecut, her beautiful eyes and the surprisingly inviting smell of her breath.
“Done,” Minuette said, handing a cup of water to Golden Harvest so she could rinse out her mouth. She carefully cleaned her tools and put them away.
Her heart raced when Golden Harvest wrapped her in a hug. Because she wasn't expecting it. That was the reason, and not because the warmth of Golden's coat felt so good against hers that she had to fight to keep a sultry nicker from her lips.
“Thanks Minuette,” Golden said, squeezing her shoulders. “You're a great friend.”
Minuette was not falling in love with her best friend. She was not best-friend-sexual. She was not falling for her cute mane and perfect teeth and beautiful eyes and her lovely round face and... and...
“Y-you can call me Colgate if you want. I don't mind.”
Stupid, adorable Golden Harvest.
The End
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Points to all you who called GoldenGate.
And the disease hops to it's next victim.
It's an okay ending, I guess.
I will have to find my Carrot x AJ shipping elsewhere. Still a good story.
*snerk*
And room for a sequel, should you ever choose to do one...
4043008 Forget that, where are we going to find some GoldenGate shipping stories? Are there even any at all?
Haha I knew it. Do a smell a sort of sequel in the works? If not this was still a great ride, thanks for sharing.
Well... that was a fun read all in all. :D
Sequel about Golden Harvest being completly oblivious about Minuette's/Colgate's crush on her? ;D
4043030 I expect they're extremely rare, if there are any at all. From what I've seen in my hunt for other stories featuring Golden, this is pretty much the only story that implies she has anything more than a passing acquaintance with Colgate. Mostly she's played as a foil to Derpy.
I don't honestly have much to say, but thank you for writing this fic. It was a cute, fun read throughout. Well done.
I enjoyed this story. The comedy helped tie it all together very well. It made it feel like more of a parody than a drama and that is what made it so enjoyable.
Thanks for all the effort you put to get us in their heads as they battled their thoughts.
I guess it helps that the levity of the situation is something a friend of mine is going through. Finding one's identity isn't easy.
Nothing really bitter about this story.
4043046
Damn you and your sequel baiting :p.
Very nice story, this. Had a lot of fun reading it, and I'm glad to see it followed a full arc. Now it's time to see what Colgate does with her new-found attraction, and see where it goes. Hopefully Golden wouldn't've found a new girlfriend before Colgate got through her sexual identity issues!
D'aww...
I'm not even mad about the lack of CarrotJack.
>Implying I was ever mad about the lack of CarrotJack.
And here we see why these two are friends. Fantastic ending to a fantastic story. Thank you for it.
that ending
I can't stop squeeing
4042999
I silently called it in my head, does that count?
Honestly, though, great story, great ending, and even though I want to read more about GoldenGate(which is probably the best shipping name I've heard since Flutterfire), the open end fits perfectly here, because this never really was a lovestory, it was a story about finding out who you are.
Please tell me you are planning a sequel of this story in Colgate's perspective? Or just another romantic comedy, because the unhealthy dose of denial and obsession coupled with good humor and quality descriptions that make one shudder makes for a very good story?
...well now we need some GoldenGate in our lives. Also, best-friend sexual is a totally awesome term, for some reason.
4043008 PONY PSYCHOLOGY SERIES
Good place for CarrotJack.
4043076 Hope your friend finds themself. Preferably without shouting in any market squares. Thank you very much for reading!
4043121 I'm kinda mad about the lack of CarrotJack. I really should've gone with the ending where Applejack turned the barn into a sex dungeon.
An adorably funny story, thanks for writing and sharing it! I'll admit, I was a little disappointed that it ended without her romantic situation resolved as that's what I expect when I read a "Romance" + "Comedy". Since she found herself and learned a life lesson this story was more of a "Slice of Life" + "Comedy" instead. That gripe aside, I'm glad I gave it a shot. Lots of laughs were had at the delusions of ponies.
4043313
Too late for that.
That's exactly how I(and a bunch of others) found out.
4043324
I would not have seen that coming.
4043328 Yeah. That's one of the troubles with twists sometimes, is that you either give them away with the tags, or the tags are misleading. I think that enough of the story is still driven by romantic feelings that the [Romance] tag still fits, if uncomfortably, but you're right in that it isn't really a standard romance. Perhaps adding [Slice of Life] is called for, though. I've always had trouble knowing when to use that one.
Here we go again!
4043324
... Okay, now I'm mad.
Wow, a rare fic where I'm supportive of two different ships with the same pony? What are the odds?
It's a sweet and funny ending, and while I won't clamor for an extended sequel, I wouldn't mind a one-shot of GoldenGate.
I liked this story although I think one more chapter before the epilogue with Golden having more of a chance to come to terms with herself would have been nice.
This is the best shipping story I have read in a long, long time. There is more originality, wit, and charm in this small story than can be found in a hundred other larger stories on this site. That charm is the big one. In a world of super serious thrillers, hyper dramatic dramas, every kind of dark gray pallet+tomato red blood mature stories, everyone seems to have forgotten the value of charm. A little bit of charm can go a very long way in imbuing a story with life. This story has so much charm that it must be starting to dribble out of its nose and down onto its upper lip by now. It's actually fun to read. That shouldn't be something I'm surprised by, but I'm genuinely amazed at how much fun I had reading this. A great romance that's fun to read. I'd forgotten it was even possible.
Carrot Top is an utterly likable character. Her ramblings are silly, but silly with a purpose. She's constantly revealing little bits of herself in those contradictory monologues, and it's a great way to develop a character. Her relationship with Applejack is actually about as cliche as it gets. Carrot wants Apple, Carrot doesn't get Apple. It's the simplest kind of tale of fruits and vegetables in love, nothing I can claim to haven't seen before. It's Carrot Top herself that makes it work so well. She's likable, she's fun, and she's real. She's totally relatable. She's a poor, love struck girl who just doesn't know what she really wants.
The development arc she goes through is believable and entirely satisfying. It's to your credit that she doesn't get with Applejack in the end. Giving her an arbitrary reward when she's completed her development would have trivialized that development. Whether or not she would be with Applejack was never the real conflict of this story. It was always about Carrot Top accepting who she is and understanding what she wants out of life. Her growth itself is the reward, and that what makes this a satisfying conclusion. And all through that development, the story never once lost its charm.
I hold this story in the highest possible regards. I have a very little negative to say about it. Maybe the pacing was a bit too fast, but that terseness is also to the story's benefit, and it never drags. Maybe the epilogue with Colgate was a little too sappy and been-there-done-that, but it does leave itself open ended. This is phenomenal, and I'm going to start rereading right now.
Damn, I wish I could write something like this.
HoofBitingActionOverload said it all, the story is really well done and entertaining.
That's one contagious ... can't really call it disease, it's not exactly deadly ... one contagious thing, that'll be infecting the Ponyville residence.
Hah, that was cute. I really love this story, despite it lacking actual shipping. Soooo... sequel?
4043324
Except that just gave me the image of Granny Smith dressed in a leather bustier, black stockings, and a riding crop. No... Bad...
Next time, Minuette goes through the rigamarole trying to work up the courage to confess to Golden Harvest, and at the end, after wacky shenanigans, we say that Applejack is falling for Minuette.
This was a highly enjoyable POV story, good show. I do so love me some quirky background ponies, and a chance to see things from their perspective is great.
4043046
Clearly this is a problem that needs to be rectified.
Better get on that.
Hahaha, loved it! I enjoy how you write these characters... keep up the good work!
I believe you earned yourself a follow.
Ta-ta for now!
-Mr. Discord
4043785
I agree with everything this guy said about this fic. It's a masterfully written piece of work and a heart warming tale of love and growth as well! Bravo!
Sequel?
Oh Colgate, that's not how you definitively tell if your friend is a lesbian.
You have to be more definitive then that!
Maybe you should ask your best friend. Just to be sure.
A good friend always makes sure. It's not a friendly thing to do to kiss a pony only to later find out that they're not all-the-way lesbian. Maybe they're just lesbian from the neck up, which would be super awkward to find out.
Yep. Wouldn't want that to happen to a friend, Colgate, who is only just a friend and you don't really want to do this for your benefit and only for hers because that's just what you're supposed to do as a good friend.
Nope. All for her benefit, you good pony you.
Esle Ynopemos, you're so wonderful! Can I have your babies?
4046139 I don't have any babies on me at the moment, but if I find any, they're all yours.
(Please note that I have failed to read any other comments)
SEQUELSEQUELSEQUELSEQUELSEQUEL!!
NOAW!!!
4048794 4044661 4043953 4043408 4043218 4043116 4043035 4043033 4043014
It's been mentioned enough that I suppose I ought to address this: There are not currently any plans for a sequel. While it would be nice to do a GoldenGate fic using the dynamic the two of them have shown in this story, I've got a lot of other projects that I would like to try and bring to fruition before I try and give it a shot. Not ruling out doing something like that eventually, but if it does happen, it won't be anytime soon.
THAT WAS THE. BEST.
POSSIBLE,
THING!
Fantastically well done dear author. A superb read from start to finish. Beautiful. Fantastic. Wonderful!
I'll be adding this to my top ten immediately. A sequel would be nice, but the ending if fantastic if you decide to keep it as is. Bravo!
BRAVO!!!
4051865 Yah, pinkie isn't one to be in touch wit her friend's feelings. And that's just not something she would say.
Definitely a top favorite. Just the way the everything played out was beautiful! Congrats on finishing the story and well done!
Its actually rather funny,considering I never read lesbian fics.But this is fantastical!
4048926
Ah, I don't mind that. I need to use my free time for other things anyway. Good luck to ya, Else, you've definitely shown me you've got a ton of talent in this fic. I'm certain your projects'll come to fruition and bring in just as much attention.
4043342
I think "Slice of Life" definitely fits, but I think "Romance" fits well, too, especially given the epilogue.
This was some of the best unreliable narrator I've read in a while, and like HoofBitingActionOverload, I found Golden Harvest to be a thoroughly charming and likable protagonist. Thank you for writing and sharing.
I thought Golden Harvest's hair was cuter before she got her manecut.
B-but I loved this story.
This was definitely above and beyond what I normally find to read on this site. Great hook (I find the first 1000 words the most important and you got me good), wonderful characterization, very witty and often humorous dialogue. 
This story is 100% Scootapproved.
The only thing I regret is that I can't upvote this brilliance more than once.
Exceptional story! I'm very glad that Present Perfect recommended it!
It's interesting, I'm thinking back on the story and wondering... was there "actual characterization" of Golden Harvest in the story? I don't mean this in a negative way; all the internal monologue, all the debating over what she actually is or isn't feeling, how she feels about her mothers... It's all important. The story is what it is because of those things. And yet, after reading it, I couldn't tell you anything about Golden except that A) she seems friendly when she's freed of her emotional burdens, B) she is good at carrot raising, and C) she's intelligent with a tendency to over-think things... though, Minuette's internal monologue was so similar in the last chapter I'm not sure if that was ACTUALLY implied internal monologue or just a writing style choice.
Let me say again that this isn't a complaint. The story contained precisely what it needed to be what it was, which is a GREAT read. It's just that, because of how we started the story in media res within Golden's internal conflict, and how we changed to someone else's perspective around the time we might have gotten insight into Golden's normal personality (when she's not going nuts), we learned MUCH more about how the OTHER characters in the story act and live their lives than we learned about Golden herself. It's really interesting to me! It's almost a way to make the character more relatable, in the end, by making her slightly formless and yet still likeable.
(Oh, and in chapter 7 you used the word "chute" when I think you meant "shoot.")
4077199 I'll be. I've been using the wrong word for little sprouts of plants my whole life...
Thank you for reading. I'll have to thank Present Perfect for the recommendation.
It's funny you should mention the thing with characterization, because a lot of the comments lately have got me thinking on what seemed to succeed in making Golden "likable." Throughout the story, she almost never does anything for the benefit of anyone besides herself, unless you count being more or less polite when ponies talk to her and hugging her mother. Maybe you could add, "seems to take rejection surprisingly well" to her list of positives... And on the other hoof, her thought process reveals her as petty, quick to blame others for her own faults or for unavoidable circumstances. She is surrounded by ponies who do nice things for her, yet we never see her really return the favor or pay it forward. Honestly, in this story Golden Harvest is a little bit of a jerk.
I wish I had a rebuttal to that, but I don't, really. If I knew what made folks like her so much, I would definitely try to use it in future stories. Maybe it's like you said, she's mouldable. People can fill in the blank spaces in her personality with what they want. Or maybe people just like redheads.