• Member Since 24th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen Last Thursday

MidnightDancer


"Never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be."– Clementine Paddleford

E
Source

Marriage is the hardest thing Carrot Cake has ever done, second only to being a father to his two foals.

Woken by a chill and finding himself quite bereft of blankets, he finds himself pondering the canyon that has appeared between he and his wife.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 86 )

denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw7901_small.jpg
☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁

3893117 :p leave my love of ascii codes alone


3893153 That means a lot, coming from you. Thanks.

3893153

Did you Dig-Dug it?

I've very mixed feelings about this. On one hand, I really like the thematic elements in this. It has a very powerful message that I admire, and I wish I could write something as deep as this. The whole premise is solid, and Mr. Cake is very well done.

On the other hand... this feels off. I feel like this should be sad, but it's really not. It's more of a brooding, introspective fic, and while there's nothing wrong with that, it feels... incomplete. I feel like there should be something more here, because I'm just not getting "dem feels." I dunno. Maybe it's just me. Very nice, either way.

3893182 Eh. Was written more for myself than anyone else. It made sense to me :p It is fairly introspective, and it wasn't meant to be ultimately sad (for once), so there's that.

I found this to be really quite provocative. There's this reality about the story, in how we change and how we do not, and how sometimes it's not a suddern shift but a subtle infiltration that leads you to the point where the person in the mirror isn't someone you're sure you know for certain, or which side of the mirror is the better one.

It takes that, and manages to acknowledge the struggle and the truth that there will be struggle without losing itself to hollow, inactive brooding. He has his moment of doubt and despair, then he gets through it.

Lots of emotions here, yet none rampant and immature. Reflective, introspective, explorative and insightful. Written like a guy who's married to his love, is natural and flawed, makes mistakes, has moments of weakness and moments of strength.
Yay for MidnightDancer's quarter-past-midnight story

Very muchy enjoied.

As I read this, I began saying to myself, "This had better end with them making up, or Imma slap-a-hoe." However, once I reached the final stretch, I realized that would have ruined the effect. The faint glimmer of hope, the resolution to make it better, the incredibly subtle body movements. Very well done. :ajsmug:

I hope your parents become batman.

3893400 Thanks, Jake!


3893408 Joke's on you, one's a ho and one's a... well, another ho.

you see where i get it from

I love this like I love you nuff said:moustache:

I know too well the feeling of screaming across the chasm at someone ten inches from you. This reminded me of it:
i.imgur.com/hkQYzxb.gif

Thanks a lot, Dancer. Sheesh :rainbowwild:

But seriously, truly moving story :pinkiehappy: Love me some good Cup/Carrot Cake fics.

I feel the feels but I don't know what to say besides good job.

Very well done, Dancer. I really liked this, the way you handled his emotions. Sweet and sad, and redeeming.

3893182

It's more of a brooding, introspective fic, and while there's nothing wrong with that, it feels... incomplete.

Probably because - at least in my mind - it is exactly that: more of a brooding, introspective fic. There's no real tragedy, not yet, but this is a good thing; while there is a chasm there, at least he realizes how much he loves his wife and how wrong he was before he could let it go too far. There are many things that hurt in life, but the death of a long-term relationship - especially a marriage - is one of the very most painful things I've ever gone through. I'm very glad this fic didn't touch on that.

Take my fav. Take my like. Take my read. Take it all!

Beautiful. :heart:

Written with such depth and emotion, I can't help but feel this was drawn from the well of personal experience - as much as I am loathe to admit it, this could be a snapshot taken directly from my own life. I'd say that it touched a chord in me, but it was more akin to playing my emotions like sheet music.

Liked and faved without hesitation.

3893449
3893524 Thanks!


3893640 sorry :3

3894103 you hit the nail on the head, there :) I've also gone through a marriage falling apart-that's not something I'm gonna drag into pone.


3894661 *takes*


3895245 It was indeed. The canyon is such a real thing, but so hard to figure out how to fix, no matter how many times it appears.

I truly wish that Hasbro would take the time to develop it's side characters like this.

Wow.
That certainly was introspective; almost dark given the themes it covers. The middle portion, where his trust began to erode, especially felt like the story equivalent of slowly, inevitably sliding down a scree slope and off a cliff. The ending though gives a glimmer of hope that the canyon can be bridged and the relationship saved.

I am sorry to hear this was based off of personal experience. Nobody should have to go through that...

On a completely unrelated and silly note this happened to pop into my mind:
derpicdn.net/img/view/2012/10/9/117854.jpg
I am a horrible person...

Comment posted by AceOmega deleted Feb 5th, 2014

3898757 The personal experience was with the canyon itself; the bit about the children was more because it's part of Cup and Carrot's life. Either way, sucks a bit, yeah.

Most of the time I like to picture the Cakes as the idyllic perfect family, but it's also nice to see a more realistic interpretation. They're not perfect, they go through troubles and obstacles like everypony else, but they still love each other and they struggle to overcome those obstacles.

I really liked it. Very interesting exploration of Carrot's thoughts. It was beautiful :twilightsmile:

Owie.... Right in the feels... :fluttercry:

All my yes. :twilightsmile:

:pinkiesad2:
Love the story

Great story! Almost brought a tear to my eye. I'm glad it ended on a hopeful note. :twilightsmile:

You know, I think this is the first story I have read by you. Let me be the first to say that you have done a damn fine job with this story. Colour me impressed at your writing abilities.

Hmm, solid writing skills, that I have to say. Also, this kind of bittersweet to me, not because I'm in a marriage or anything, but my parents aren't exactly going through their best phase right now. So yeah, this has a pretty personal feel to it, but it was still an enjoyable story. As an admin of Twilight's library, I say good job and let's approve this fic.

Dancer, you make me feel the feels :raritydespair:
I quite enjoyed this; it was easy for my tired mind to glance over at 5:56 AM. Some may call that a mark of a pedestrian story, but honestly, stories to not gain merit by being harder to read/understand (which is something I've yet to learn with my stories). If you can make a tired kid cry at the early hours of the morning, while the words flow like a sweet honey, then you wrote a damn good fic.

Schisms and chasms grow and shrink, avalanches fill the gorges we once thought impassable. The Earth doesn't part to keep us away from one another, but to save us from creating something worse than a divide together.
;~;

Your stories, Dancer, they often scare me, because I am weak of character. I'm young, and I have yet to experience the hardships of life on a grand scale. One day, though, I'll get out of gas, out of car, out of road, out of everything at last, huddled up on the floor of some convenience store bathroom, cold; and in that moment, it's not funny, for once (for when bad things happen to me, they usually are). For once, I am more pathetic than I ever was, and I will be purely and completely terrified. Even though it's just pony fanfiction, you set a part of yourself into it that doesn't make me pity you, it makes me admire how god damn strong you are, as a person.

And I hope that one day I'll be able to exhibit half of the strength you do.

I love you, mom.

One issue:

or is it to ensnare, to capture, to hold the other aloft and score points on some Luna-damned board?


and your other usage of Luna strikes me as careless, really; Luna has not been around long enough to instill herself as a god figure yet (especially so since Carrot Cake grew up and lived a good portion of his adult life believing that Celestia was the only sister. Do note that Luna was basically a faded figment, a part of nightmare night at the very most, and I can't easily see him hailing her as a god figure so soon.)

3944479 Awww Regi ;~; Second-best son <3

Thanks. Seriously. It helps to hear. I about teared up.

3956801 I meant every god damn word :heart:

3895245

Mmm. Character development is a precious thing, and every bit costs. So they focus on the main characters.

This story was a sucker-punch to the feels. And like a sucker-punch, it left me light-headed and a little out of breath.

Okay, so the chapter title is a cloud. I need to know how to do this so bad, I had to edit this comment for profanity. Clouds are awesome.

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I copypasted this what is this what is it i am no longer capable of multiplying by two

HAHAHA YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU HAVE UNLEASHED

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Short... but impactful. Emotional. Well done, I'm sure that they can recover.

Words fail me, save one: fantastic

How are you able to do that with your chapters titles?

Marriage, much like life, is a journey. However, staying with your loved one always requires that both people/ponies must take part in. How did you put so much feeling into these characters?

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