• Member Since 24th Dec, 2011
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Mixed greens and poison ivy salad, rocket fuel vinaigrette | Hundred-proof spirits from the fountain of wisdom | Iced Ko-Fi, scalding glances.


"Alright, Miss Sparkle. For your last manecut, you asked to take three inches off all around, except on the bangs. Would you like that same thing again? Or would you prefer to try something different this time?"

The question, of course, terrified Twilight Sparkle.


Now featuring a Polish translation by the fabulous aTOM!

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 99 )

You have proven that no matter what situation Twilight is in, no matter how small, in the end she will most likely be one error away from Lesson Zero. Bravo as well.

:rainbowderp: This is on EQD. And it only has one comment before this!! :pinkiegasp:

Nice story, I like how you managed to put in the part about Twilight wanting to still be treated as normal despite her status. It really fits her humble personality. But this part kind of confused me:

Slowly, achingly, Twilight turned her head towards the voice, finding none other than her future ex-friend Applejack—who, much to the unicorn's relief, still wore her usual chipper grin.

Which one of them is the unicorn? Applejack is an earth pony, and Twilight is an alicorn.... :twilightblush:

It's good to know that I'm not the only one who has a nervous breakdown when asked how he wants his hair cut. Even if my only peer in this sense is a fictional, anthropomorphic pony.

Oh my sweet Celestia, Twi's being her adorkable OCD overdramatic self. Ah...how I needed this. Maybe we should have the Quills and Sofas shopkeep send her a complimentary Drama Couch?

May the Grace of the Valar Protect You

Shire Folk

You'd think that Twilight would have already learned to use her magic on her own mane.

No trimming of her tail?

And why didn't she just teleport home if she was worried about other seeing her?

Le title le reminds le me about le this le song:


Holy crap, are there no therapists in Equestria? Are Princesses somehow forbidden to take anti-anxiety meds? Because if anypony needs them, it's Twilight. Fluttershy just has problems with other ponies. Twilight has problems with EVERYTHING.


If it counts for anything, I once got my hair cut only for the razor to get stuck in my hair, pulling it.

Scariest five seconds of my life.

You have my condolences.

Brilliant, well delivered. and entertaining.

Good to see a story that takes seriously something less weighty than "the end of the world." Especially when it also happens to be funny. :twilightsmile:

The interesting thing about Twilight is that she takes big, genuine emergencies in stride, and handles the pressures of organisation and command easily. It's only the little, inconsequent things where she doesn't have enough to do and her brain can spin its wheels to insane RPMs that drive Twilight to the nuttiness.

This feels like it could an animated short. A really funny one at that. :rainbowlaugh:

twilight being her nervous self, again.

congrats on both the feature box AND EQD!

Being as neurotic as Twilight must be a horrible existence about half of the time.

This is why Applejack is best pony....she might not be as well educated as Twi but she's a damned sight SMARTER........

Twilight is so adorkably neurotic sometimes. :derpyderp1:

(Uh... what's "neurotic"?) :rainbowhuh:
(Obsessive, unstable, prone to excessive anxiety and emotional upset) :unsuresweetie:
(Nuttier 'n a squirrel's breakfast.) :ajsmug:
(Oh, you mean crazy?)
(I am not crazy! My mother had me tested!) :twilightangry2:

She needs to remove her bangs or place them in a different position, her current mane cut doesn't appeal to me at all.
Craziest Princess ever, remove her Alicorn status.

Somepony really needs some counselling.

" But no, she just had to wallow in her own pity puddle"
Why does the thought of twilight wallowing in a puddle of tangible pity almost seem cute?

they could turn her hair-do into a hair-oh-sweet-Celestia-what's-on-your-head-and-how-did-it-die-there.

My god, the laughs from this....

I quite enjoyed that. Just like her to freak out over a haircut!

~Skeeter The Lurker

2792151 You don't need to sign your name we know who you are...

oh poor poor Twilight. This was written so dman well. Really got accross the extrapolating to crazy feel ^^'

The sad part is that Twilight WOULD think of something so small to freak out about, even as the Goddess of Magic she's still the same Twi, poor, poor Twi:facehoof::rainbowlaugh: I love it! Wait, wait, wait, I got more...she can face two Gods and an army like it's nothing but freaks out over a letter being late and a mane cut? Is she high?


I know. But it's how I am. I shall not be changing that anytime soon.

~Skeeter The Lurker


I think one day you should decide to mess with people, and sign your name as "Leeter the Skurker".

What a fun little showing of imagery. Very fun to read :rainbowdetermined2:



Also, I find it funny people are downvoting me for sticking to my guns. I'm laughing loud at that.

~Skeeter The Lurker

Classic Twilight, right here. This very easily could be canon Twilight, and it's stuff like this that makes us love her. Very good work, yes.

I daring do did like this. Very well done.

2792832 That's why we love her so :twilightblush: Twilight is my favorite pony :D

2789156 Geee, Why don't you say "le" twelve more times?

DIS STORY. My goodness, I could feel it. Feel it in my heart the anticipation! :raritystarry:

On a side note: I liked so many comments, the site's starting to think I'm a bot. Never had that happen before... :fluttershbad:

In the words of Ron Weasley, she needs to sort out her priorities.

Very nice story. I especially like the similes you put in there.

Fluttershy at an air horn convention...heh heh...

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