• Member Since 13th Oct, 2021

Nihilistic Janitor


im cringe, and thats based! i will never be based and thats not cringe!

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Found 503 stories in 71ms

Total Words: 26,130,104
Estimated Reading: 10 weeks

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T

This story is a sequel to This is bad!


With everything going back to normal... *Pft* Who am I kidding? Nothing is normal in the town of Ponyville. With the everyday craziness that you can find there, you can now find even more of it. I present to you Pinkie Pie and Diane Pie! Yes, there are two of them in town now!


As Alexander settles into Ponyville as Diane Pie. He enjoys the daily life of Pinkie Pie as she shows him the ropes to being a party pony. Meeting the family, explaining what is going on to every new pony he meets and getting used to now being called "she". All in a pink pony's day.

Trying not to think about her own home world Diane jumps the opportunity to fit in. All is fine, even if she does know that some things will be coming their way in the near future... Only thing is that she thinks she knows what. When in reality, she has no idea how wrong she is.
For in the shadows, there are others, not so happy with the recent turn of events. And they will do anything to get things their way.

But for now, let's see if we can get a status report from Diane Pie as she once again turns to the fourth wall to explain what happened since we last saw her and what is currently going on.


Featured! 2015-06-12 - 2015-06-14
Featured! 2015-09-28
Featured! 2015-12-22
Featured! 2016-05-04

Chapters (6)
T

Princess. Alicorn. The pillar of all ponykind, against which so many ponies often judged themselves. Celestia hates having to constantly be these things, and it's past time for a break. Luna will watch over Equestria while her sister is gone, but taking a break from your duties and taking a break from how the world sees you are two very different matters. Enter Prominence, a quiet pony who nopony really pays much mind to. Perhaps because she doesn't exist.

Aided by this disguise, Celestia will find her peace and relaxation in the home of one of the few ponies who know Prominence's true identity: Princess Twilight Sparkle. But when Twilight begins to see Celestia as a pony, and not a princess, can she deal with the feelings that arise? And are the feelings for Celestia, or for a pony she knows is not actually real?

EDIT: I've been featured, July 19th, 2014. I have no words to express how terrified and humbled and terrified and proud and happy and terrified this makes me.

Chapters (11)
T
Source

Celestia wants Twilight and her friends to loosen up a little bit around her. Luna just wants to try the hard cider. During a surprise visit to Sweet Apple Acres at the tail end of cider season, Princess Luna has just a bit too much to drink, and when she makes a rather inappropriate joke, Twilight comes to the very uncomfortable realization that she has never seen Celestia excuse herself to use the restroom.

Chapters (11)
T

In the days before Equestria was even a dream and mares are second-class citizens, a pony with a solar cutie mark, Sunny Daze, decides to help her brother become a mage. She doesn't realize that she and the sun have an appointment with destiny.


Sequel novelette: https://www.fimfiction.net/story/430769/to-keep-light-in-eternal-darkness


Accepted for an Equestria Daily Story post on September 24, 2017.
Shelved in the Royal Canterlot Library on August 12, 2019.


The Teen rating is for 10th century AD gender issues faced by a mare that are no longer experienced by the characters in modern (show canon) MLP.


Thanks to DoContra for pre-reading, plenty of suggestions, and copy-editing assistance. Thanks to Equestria Daily submission editors for a lot of stuff I fixed after they pointed out I missed it!

Chapters (18)
T

This story is a sequel to The Witch of the Everfree


Saddle Arabia is a land of mysteries and ancient legends, and Sunset Shimmer sees it as a great place to escape from her mistakes for a while. What caused her to flee Equestria, and can she find a way to prove herself and win back the favor of the ponies she wronged?

More importantly, can she avoid starting a war?


I'd like to thank all my followers, fans, and patreon subscribers. Without all of you, I'd be worse off in every way.

Chapters (18)
T

Sunset Shimmer is having the worst day of her life. She used to be important. She was the personal student of Princess Celestia. She was a future leader of Equestria. She was the kind of mare that everypony envied.

Today, it's all crashing down around her.

Alternate Universe: What if Sunset Shimmer hadn't gone through the mirror?

Chapters (11)
E

Love is one feeling that can never be taken from someone's heart. No matter how many years of separation, no matter what wrongs were done in the past, no matter how much enmity exists between two ponies, love will always stand; at least that's what Nightmare Moon is hoping for. 700 years ago was the last time she had seen her sister Celestia, and her departing words had simply been 'I love you'. Now, after so long, Nightmare Moon's heart longs for its other half; and thus, she has brought Celestia back from the far away, magically void lands she cast her to so long ago. Now, she wonders if her sister will ever find it in her heart to forgive her for what she's done, and if their lives together can ever resume as they once had.


Takes place 300 years before when Luna would have returned from her banishment to the moon, and takes place in a universe where Nightmare Moon was never banished in the first place.


TVTropes Page!
Thanks everyone for getting the story to the feature box! (12/10/16)
This is now my 1st story to have broken 200 likes! Thank you all so much!
SPOILERS IN THE COMMENTS

Chapters (13)
T

Princess Celestia is a living legend, but much of her life is shrouded in mystery. Records have long since been lost to the decay of time, and the tale of her triumph over Discord has become a fable. The Princess's memory of the event has long since faded... or has it?

Her faithful student lending an eager ear, Celestia recounts the true story of a war-torn Equestria, the struggle against Discord, and the early years of her own life.

Before she was the Princess of the Sun, she was merely a stranger.

(Featured on Equestria Daily!)

Chapters (36)
T
Source

Clover the Clever never asked for his life to get so complicated.  It was bad enough tricking a drunk Imperatrix Celestia, war goddess of the Three Tribes, out of her accidental coup against Queen Platinum.  But now the most dangerous pony in Equestria has returned to trade her claim on the sun for a chance to woo him.

On top of that, his erstwhile mentor Star Swirl the Bearded has saddled him with a mysterious magical necklace and a uniquely bleak and pointless prophecy: If he's brave enough, and if he's clever enough, he just might survive Celestia for long enough to break her heart.


Now with an audio reading by ScarlettBlade!

Recommended by PresentPerfect! "horizon gave me the story I needed rather than the one I wanted ... along the way we get some very strong lessons about love, and meditations on the value of a lifetime and what one pony can achieve on their own."

Featured on Equestria Daily!

First place, "Out of Time" Writeoff! (11/2015) At long last, expanded to novella size! The world-spanning, centuries-spanning romance as it was always meant to be told!

PRAISE FOR THE WRITEOFF VERSION:
"One of my favorite depictions of Celestia in a long time." –billymorph
"To the top of the ballot with it." –AugieDog
"There’s going to be a lot of tears shed when this one hits publish." –Georg
"You need to read Time Enough For Love. I literally swore out loud when my computer crashed when I was halfway through, and then I immediately whipped out my smartphone to finish it. And now I'm reading it again in a desperate attempt to figure out how it does its job so damn well." –Bachiavellian
"I can get behind some historical revisionism for such a brilliant story. The writing is second-to-none … I laughed, I cried, and I felt other things too." –Trick Question

Cover art by Nadnerb.

Chapters (12)
E

Once upon a time, there were two friends who ran a farrier shop in Canterlot. The oldest fed the forge and used his earth pony magic to produce strong steel shoes, which the younger enchanted with his powerful unicorn magic. They worked together in harmony, creating beautiful shoes for all who visited until one day they met a young mare in their local bar. She was a mysterious creature, overstressed by her job in the palace and needing the company of two friends far more than she realized.

Until one night, when her sister returned during the Summer Sun Festival…

Created as a Collaborative work between Georg and Tek, who made all the good parts.
Editor: Snaproll

Cover art Horseshoe and Rose by public domain clipart, edited in Paint3D
Now featured on Equestria Daily

Chapters (12)