My name is James Clark, and I am a Private Military Contractor. No, not Mercenary. Yes, there is a difference, but that's beside the point.

Ok, where was I? Ah yes, I was just entering my office in Downtown Houston one afternoon to hear a job offer. When I got there, I found a beautiful, robe-wearing woman waiting for me. Now, in this day and age, most people would find that strange. I didn't for two reasons.

1) In this line of work, you run into a few crazies. If I had a dollar for every nut-job I turned away, I could buy a small European country.

2) It was Halloween. Hell, I was on my way to a party dressed in a replica suit of Veteran Ranger Armor from Fallout: New Vegas, complete with gas mask and real riot gear I borrowed from a friend on the SWAT team. I was gonna win the costume contest for sure!

I'm getting off topic, aren't I? Anyways, this weirdo offered me a job without going into much detail. No location, no objective, not even a dollar amount The only thing I got out of her was the promise that I would be saving thousands, if not millions of lives.

Every instinct told me to turn the job down, and yet I still accepted it. Maybe the idea of playing hero again had its appeal.

God, I had no idea what I was getting myself into.

Ever been bested by a sickeningly sweet pony, specifically one who wields the Elements of Harmony? Are you just tired of love and hope and kindness filling your world? I know I am. Come to the next meeting of Villains Anonymous, where no unjust deed of cruelty goes unrewarded. Discuss your beliefs of disaster and anarchy with your like-minded colleagues, speak of plans for your next big scheme for world domination, or just be a stuck-up jerk. Here at Villains Anonymous, all evil is welcome.

-Discord, The Spirit of Disharmony

P.S., Chrysalis, it's your turn to bring snacks.

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Updated 11/11/12

Seeing as how some of you want me to write more, I'll get on it soon.

Years drifting in space aboard a frigates wreck with nothing to do but wait and think can really wear an AI thin, and when that AI is already past its expected rampancy date, all that thinking time is dangerous. Very dangerous. Fortunately for Cortana, the frigate is pulled into an unknown planets atmosphere, allowing her to take her mind off of rampancy for a while. After being rudely awoken from cryo sleep, the Master Chief, along with Cortana, manages to escape the burning vessel. They have very serious problems though...

They have no idea where they are, or how they'll get back to Earth.

They can only hope someone finds their distress beacon, and fast. The Chief doesn't have many supplies, and with a rapidly decaying AI in his head, he has a lot on his hands. Luckily for them, the planet is life supporting. Unfortunately though, the inhabitants of the strange planet aren't the most welcoming of a seven foot tall alien, especially when that alien is as aggressive and lethal as Spartan-117. The Chief has only one objective, find a way off of the planet. The inhabitants will soon learn, however, that the Spartan is extremely aggressive, and will stray slightly from his objective to harm them if he must. Chief also learns that these beings are no pushovers, and will defend their home and kingdom with their lives.

The first few chapters are mostly to establish a plot, there will be much more action after them. This is also my first fic, so constructive criticism is appreciated. I will be reading the comments quite thoroughly for the first while, so you may see some of your ideas in future chapters. I am only 15 years old, so basically, I have school, homework, and sports that will quite often get in the way of this story, but I will work on it as much as I can when I can. I won't give up or quit in the middle of the story despite what the ratings may be, and last but not least, I won't be turning this into some huge cliche war where Equestria ends up fighting the UNSC and whatnot. Because Equestria would get screwed. Badly. Then the story would be ruined, so, I hope anyone who reads this enjoys!

I do not own the Halo franchise, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, or Forward Unto Dawn.

Story added on October 25th. Edited by myself, and inspired by Halo: Ponies and Clouded Pasts by Blazer and The Mercy, Regret, and Truth by Master 4871.

PS: This made it into the featured box the second day it was uploaded, and remained there for a couple weeks. I'm pretty damn proud of that since this was my first fanfic ever, and the first thing I ever posted anywhere. The only other people to read my creative writing creations were my English teachers and occasionally my grandparents and father. So seeing the first thing I submit get such great feedback and a huge amount of views (huge to me), is just amazing to me.

Thanks, bros.

When Twilight Sparkle decides to try a new spell she has perfected, she successfully pulls a being from another universe into Equestria. That being coincidentally is a human...that human coincidentally is you. What at first just seems like an opportunity for first contact between two species soon becomes something much more when certain truths are brought to light...and everything you knew about your life is flipped onto its head.

NOTE: At times in this story, the main character's thought process will be shown as an inner monologue with his brain. BRAIN's dialogue will appear in this color of text.

Discord has been defeated, and Twilight and her friends are eager to get back into the swing of everyday life. Shortly after the end of the victory ceremony in Canterlot, Celestia asks a favour of Twilight, to put Discord back where he belongs, and the ever-faithful student accepts.

By noon of the next day, however, Twilight has both a startling revelation, and a terrible new secret to keep. Otherwise, the last thing she sees may in fact be the statue garden.

Acknowledgements
Edited and test-read by DreamVirusOmega (aka PoisonClaw) and Nonagon
Heavily inspired by and adapted from Garden Party: Petrified by PumpkinHipHop
Cover art used with permission by DocWario

The Canterlot Caverns are a strange and enigmatic place, untouched and forgotten by pony-kind for centuries. So when a strange metal object is unearthed in their depths, it's up to Twilight Sparkle and Lyra Heartstrings to discover the many secrets it holds.

Together, the two of them will have to do their best to understand the remnants of an ancient civilization, and decipher what remains of Those Who Came Before.

The cover-image is a cleverly edited stock image, which was modified by the stupendous Corvo.
Proofreading was performed by the equally fantastical writers:
Timetraveling Pony (Who started as a proofreader when Cloud was writing this. Hats off to him for being dedicated and staying on as a proofreader for me.)
DustyPwny
Tidal
Superluminous
Night Spark
PhiliChez

And a special Thank You goes to The Sentient Cloud for allowing me the honor of continuing this great story after he retired from writing fimfictions.

As it turns out, this story is eerily similar to Lyra Heartstrings and the Hand of Man. Due to their similarity, I feel that it would be appropriate to give said story a mention.

It's a bright sunny day in Ponyville. Ponies talk, ponies laugh, and then there's the huge black death sphere that sucks up all matter in its path.

Celestia has fought many powerful foes. Nightmare Moon. Discord. Chrysalis. But she has only ever feared one. When the nightmare from her foalhood returns for the lives of her pupil and her pupil's friends, what will Celestia do? Will she rescue the Mane 6 from a premature demise? Can she?

Credit for the brilliant cover art goes to my friend Martha at dingus-flavin.tumblr.com.

This story has been riffed in Doctor and Ditzy's science theatre by Rixizu. You can find it on his user page here

Spike has been missing for three years. Why he disappeared is a mystery to everypony. What caused him to leave in the first place, and why is he suddenly back now? He's acting cold towards his old friends and won't reveal why. He's lost his love for Rarity and is treating everypony he comes across the same way Gilda did.

Opening theme for this story is: Constellations - Sound of the Aviators

Rated: Teen for language and potential sexual outcomes.

Warning: Self-harm is described in this story. If you are prone to self-harm or know someone who is and feel uncomfortable reading about the subject, then I don't recommend reading the story.

I have always been alone in this forest. I have always feasted in this forest. I call this forest home and those ponies that travel through it are my prey. I devour all those who fear me, all who come to face me. They fear me for I am Fear incarnate. But now...I have met one who does not fear...and I am unsure of what do with her...

Image by the very awesome thewraithofwolf