My name is James Clark, and I am a Private Military Contractor. No, not Mercenary. Yes, there is a difference, but that's beside the point.
Ok, where was I? Ah yes, I was just entering my office in Downtown Houston one afternoon to hear a job offer. When I got there, I found a beautiful, robe-wearing woman waiting for me. Now, in this day and age, most people would find that strange. I didn't for two reasons.
1) In this line of work, you run into a few crazies. If I had a dollar for every nut-job I turned away, I could buy a small European country.
2) It was Halloween. Hell, I was on my way to a party dressed in a replica suit of Veteran Ranger Armor from Fallout: New Vegas, complete with gas mask and real riot gear I borrowed from a friend on the SWAT team. I was gonna win the costume contest for sure!
I'm getting off topic, aren't I? Anyways, this weirdo offered me a job without going into much detail. No location, no objective, not even a dollar amount The only thing I got out of her was the promise that I would be saving thousands, if not millions of lives.
Every instinct told me to turn the job down, and yet I still accepted it. Maybe the idea of playing hero again had its appeal.
God, I had no idea what I was getting myself into.
Got an idea in my head after playing New Vegas. Don't expect regular updates.
My first non-crossover, and my first 1st-oerson fic.
Self-edited only.
Special thanks to Totalynotabrony for pre-reading.
Yes it's here! *starts reading*
Time to read!
Woo! It's here! Sounds interesting Gyvon.
=^.^=b <-- the highly coveted 'Otter Thumbs Up'.
Haha, this is your first non-crossover? It still feels pretty crossover-ish to me!
Anyways, you get a big ole read later sticker. Congrats, you're number 8 on the list.
I will return.
One day.
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ANOTHER!
Pretty good, overall.
His first instinct WAS partially right, considering there's a place in Africa called Equestria... ( http://goo.gl/maps/KcL6x )
A six shot revolver chambered in .500 S&W would be goddamn HUGE, considering that the Model 500 takes 5 shots and is already a hand cannon.
1256087 Otters have thumbs? (Sorry, I couldn't resist)
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Hence why getting an Otter Thumbs Up is so rare and coveted!
While I'd agree anything chambering the .500 S&W might be overkill, remember there are manticores on the way to Canterlot. The way this seems to be going, the Everfree is on the itinerary. Unplanned, of course.
Mr. Clark, eh? I think Fallout and Tom Clancy are about to have a long, heart-felt ... conversation. Yeah, that's the ticket.
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You fooled me with the red hair, I was guessing that he was getting hired by a disguised Fausticorn so I totally missed the hints about who was actually hiring him. Not a bad start.
hmm wondering if i should read already have 17 other stories to read hmm only 5k words might as well
In the world of self defense and firearms, no handgun is overkill, many large caliber side-arms where designed with bear hunting defense in mind, but not all. The Desert Eagle was made for shooting out engine blocks originally. Just some examples of why big ass bullets in handguns actually makes sense.
It was a decent beginning, but while fending off an assassination attempt does provide action and sets the mood/tone of the moment (as well as the reputation of the protaganist) the fact of the matter is that it didn't make any sense really for the diamond dog to attack him. Other than profit, there wasn't a lot of gain to be had, and it was in front of a TON of witnesses, with the sheriff apparently in town. Now if the human had done something to Piss Off the diamond dog, it would be a different.
I like it, but I think Gyvon needs to make sure things don't stretch the sense of disbelief. Unless of course, the Diamond Dog was hired by Chrysalis and the author is a whole lot more savvy then I realized. If so, carry on, author, carry on.
Your in CLIFFHANGARLAND
Moare
Interesting, though I have to echo the hope that there is more of a story behind the diamond dog attack.
Aww. He sould've disarmed the mutt, steal his knife and shiv him with it. That would've been cooler.
Also he would've acquired a knife, and have two more bullets than he does now.
Nice to see H-Town mentioned in a story, Houstonians really cant drive can they? Anyway, nice start to the story, this will be interesting.
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In this particular case, it doesn't need to really make sense. Because, at it's heart, despite the Fallout references, despite the ponies, this is a spaghetti western.
Speaking of...
Just curious but how much ammo does he have on him? Something tells me he is going to go though it like nothing in a short amount of time.
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I thought I made that clear in the first chapter.
Edit: I did. 18 + 17 in the holdout (minus two in a diamond dog skull)
I loik it.
I like it so far! I not only just got finished playing New Vegas, but I also lived in Conroe, TX for six years (about 45 minutes north of Houston if you don't already know). Looking forward to where this story is headed!
Liking the logical progression of plot; this could turn out to be an excellent adventure if you play your cards right.
This is looking very, very promising. Here, have a favorite.
Twilight seems relatively unshaken by seeing someone meet a violent bloody end right in front of her.
Needed more reaction.
less than an hour in equestria, and he's planted two .22 rounds in a Diamond Dog.
...I like this guy
Good job on this story. I like where this is going
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I suppose you are right. I'm not that familiar with westerns myself, other than The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly (which is an awesome movie). Now that I think about it, this being a Western, what he did was perfectly believable. But seeing as he is going to be leaving that setting soon to go to Canterlot, I think it might be more akin the Texas Ranger style persona. Or is that persona already considered "western?"
Looks good.
yay Walter!
Haha! Jeff Dunham!
Just Twahlaht? Some random militaryish guy as the main character? Hoping there isn't unending combat or this'll get old fast.
A badass start to the story if i do say so myself.
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If The Man with No Mane goes to Canterlot, I somehow see it turning out kind of like the relevant scenes from a Fistful of Dollars. Or possibly The Good, The Bad, and The Weird (not really a spaghetti western, but still good).
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Missing comma
Missing period
I'm too tired right now for any meaningful discussion of the story's contents, but I am intrigued. Let's see where this goes.
mlkshk.com/r/D9N
what map are you using?
the nation in South America is spelled COLOMBIA not Columbia. I should know since my family is from there. Columbia is a university in NYC a river in the Pacific Northwest and a Sportswear company. the country again, is COLOMBIA two "o"'s No "u" s
that aside this is VERY well written and an interesting concept. MOAR
Very nice. A human portrayed as a bad-ass for once. He should have taken the diamond dogs knife though, or bought one with his supply of money.
Nice work. Our good Mr. Clarke seems like an interesting character, and I loved how he introduced himself to Twilight.
It looks like this is going to be a whole lot of fun.
That diamond dog was too hot headed thinking he could take Clarke on. At least now his brain has cooling vents.
XD
I'm impressed. Can't wait for more.
Typo I noticed: "She loks like the bookworm type"
This is... Surprisingly good. I thought I wouldn't like it, but I feel that this has plenty of potential. One favourite for you.
A bag of gold worth thousands of dollars wouldn't have a noticeable weight. To put it in perspective, hold a dozen quarters in your hand: That's the weight of over $3000 of gold.
This is a very common error writers make. Partly because Hollywood insisted on using massively oversized coins and huge numbers of gold bars. (Those 'bricks' you see in some movies and TV shows? You could probably retire on just one of them.)