Side story to Long Story Short, Things Went Down. No need to read that, though!

Beer tastes bad, Whiskey is just horrible, and Colgate does not like drinking.

This is the story of how Colgate met Berry Punch for the first time, and how she saw a bartender who was clearly a ninja.

Proofread by:

• Lucky Roll
• Selbi
• Octavia Harmony
• Neko Majin C

This story is a sequel to Long Story Short, Things Went Down

Time Turner is preparing for the most important lecture of his life. However, he's so nervous he feels like one wrong move will mess up everything. Thankfully, his friends are there to help him relax.

The problem is not that his friends are sociopaths. The problem is that they are sociopaths and mad at him.

Proofread by:

• Lucky Roll
• Selbi
• Neko Majin C

Katherine Bosley, who never really cared much of what others thought of her, was having a really, really crappy day. But when she unwittingly gets thrown into Equestria, and finds herself marked as public enemy #1, she's had just about enough of taking the crap the universe throws at her.
Someone is gonna get torn a new one.
And it may or may not be her.
Will she survive? Probably not, but she'll be darned if she doesn't go out with a bang.

Inspired by The Rise of Darth Vulcan and F*** it, I'm having fun.
I realized there were no stories of this newfound genre that have a girl villain. So here you go.
Mild language- I don't like getting in the habit of dropping F-bombs.
Please feel free to point out any grammatical mistakes I make. Now edited by GDQuirm, who puts up with my excessive and exhaustive use of the semicolon.

5/17/14- How the heck did I get in the feature box again?- 30 minutes later, it's over. :/

Golden Harvest is not jealous. Sure, her neighbor Applejack has a life of adventure and glamor, friends who are national heroes and princesses, an appallingly lucrative share in the local fruit market, and firm, toned flanks. And sure, by contrast, Golden Harvest has been stuck with her snout in the same old muddy patch of carrots pretty much every day since she earned her cutie mark, her best friend is a dentist, and her idea for a 'Carrot Juice Season' never really gained much ground for some reason. But Golden Harvest is not jealous.

Not jealous at all.

She just wishes Applejack would stop being so distracting.

*

Pre-read by Midnight Herald and Communist Bob (no link).

The love lives of the fillies in the Ponyville Schoolyard are kicked into high gear by the arrival of a new colt who only wishes to be left alone. However, with everypony wanting to welcome him and be his friend, or give him a hard time for being a Blank Flank, he sees no other option than to counterattack the only way he knows how, passive aggressively.

Little could he have known that surprise kisses and group date invites are less effective at driving fillies away than it was back in his homeland, and he soon finds himself at the center of crush central with no way out. Sometimes, being a Winning Pony is a curse.

Former Proofreader: Letedwend

Gentle Strokes is a cynical drunk from Dodge Junction. Stormy is the proud black sheep of a wealthy Manehattan family. Together they're two shining examples of the student body at Camden — Equestria's most prestigious liberal arts college. Navigating their way through one night stands, flirty professors, "End Of The World" parties, junkie roommates, family melodrama, sex, drugs and Rock 'N' Roll as they try their hooves at a college relationship.

Cover art provided by the wonderful: Kill Joy.

A hero who dies with honor; who dies for the human race; who dies for the greater good- what is their reward?

What is his reward? Has he been recognized for his sacrifice?

Nobody knows.

I claim no rights to Infamous 1 or 2.

When Carrot Top discovers that her coltfriend is cheating on her, her first reaction is to kick him to next Monday. The fact that at the moment her coltfriend is attending Blueblood's birthday party doesn't seem to convince her otherwise.

The good news, her friends are all there to get her out of trouble.

The bad news, her friends are all a bunch of sociopaths.

Proofreading by:

• The-baas
• Rainshine
• Selbi (Chapter 2 onwards)
• Neko Majin C

There's a plague infecting Equestria, and Diamond Tiara has taken it upon herself to cure it. They may be stronger in number and in sheer absurdity, but she's got a little something special to even the odds.

That something being a three-foot long magically enchanted samurai sword. Look, nobody said this was gonna be pretty.

(Written for the FIMFiction Writeoff Association's inaugural writeoff. The prompt was "Lonely Happiness". I got a bit creative with it.)

King Sombra’s dark influence was obliterated by the Crystal Heart, and the villain is well and truly dead. But when he attempts to steal the afterlife of an innocent victim, a human spirit is left hurtling towards Equestria, where this unfortunate soul is revived into the only vessel available: the reconstituted body of King Sombra himself.

Thus, a cheerfully oblivious alien is crammed into the form of the most evil and malicious being Equestria has ever known. Not that Shining Armor and Cadence know this, of course. As far as they are concerned, the King is back and he’s lost his fricking mind.

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