Not having ANY of this S###

by Technopathic

Chapter 2- I think, therefore I am...right?

So I had just seen a yellow Pegasus and what looked like a mad science experiment in crossing a lion and a Black Panther run away from me like their tails were on fire. Granted, I was twice the pegasus’s height, and my body and clothes had apparently turned black, but I wasn’t that scary.

It took all of around five seconds for it to click that if the pegasus came here and could speak, there was a chance it lived somewhere nearby. A chance I could reason with it, ask it for help, or maybe a ride home.

I took off into the forest after it, hoping I wouldn’t lose it in the dark undergrowth. Which, in all honesty, wasn’t much of an issue. All I had to do was follow the drawn-out, uninterrupted shrill screaming. Geez, does she ever breathe? I thought, hopping over a gnarled root threatening to trip me up.

It didn’t take very long until I made it out of the forest. I took a look at where I had ended up. I had tailed her to a field with a very large tree, and a chicken coop with wooden fencing. I heard a door slam, and turned to notice that there was a door of all things on the tree. My focus broadened, and I noticed it sported windows with drapes to boot. Good God, it’s a freaking house. I realized.

Okay. A pegasus that lives in a literal tree house. And has chickens, apparently. And birdhouses. Not the weirdest thing I’d seen all evening.

I suddenly realized just how tired I was. I had been through heck today, and I just wanted to crash. Sleep. Must sleep.

I considered going up and knocking on the door, asking the pegasus for a place to sleep, just for the night. I mentally slapped myself once I realized how stupid that idea was. If she had run screaming at the sight of me, what made me think she was going to willingly let me sleep in her house, perhaps after an explanation of myself and a lively discussion over a cup of tea.

No, I’m going to have to find another way to approach her. I realized, Some way that won’t result in gratuitous amounts of screaming.

I looked around. That leaves me two options: the coop or the forest. I stole a backwards glance at the forest, and thought of the lion-panther and God-knows-what-else waiting for me within its walls. I shuddered. No way in hell.

That left the chicken coop. Ugh. Well, beggars can’t be choosers. I strode over to the coop, my legs kind of wobbly. I easily stepped over the picket fence, and dove into the tiny doorway. It was a tight squeeze. Very tight, as a matter of fact, but I managed somehow, after a couple of minutes of flailing around like an idiot. Stupid fat hips.

I was greeted by terrified squawking and a flash of white feathers. An impossible amount of feathers filled the tiny cramped room, blocking my view. Maybe it’s molting season. As soon as the wall of fluffy white settled, I spat out a few feathers that had made their way into my mouth. Blech. Chicken didn’t taste nearly as appetizing raw.

I had a clearer view of the room. There were two neat little rows of nests inside, made up of feathers and loose bits of straw. At the back end of the room were the chickens, huddled together, clucking and shaking as though they were terrified of something.

Why shouldn’t they be?

I got to work making a suitable place to crash for the night. I picked all the eggs out of the nests on the left and set them down in the nests to the right, then bunched the mass of nests into a makeshift bed. Not an easy task when you have to crouch just to fit in the tiny coop.

I carefully set myself down on the bed, and curled up until I could just barely fit on it. It was itchy and barely comfortable at all, but it was a place to sleep. Suddenly my rickety old bed from the house was looking a lot more appealing. Finally, exhaustion prevailed and I fell into a deep sleep.

*******************************************************

I woke up to the crow of a rooster, bright and early, which is a statement I thought I’d never say without gratuitous amounts of sarcasm or metaphor. I turned onto my back, grumbling sleepily. My back was aching something fierce, and the dim, early morning light shined into the coop.

I hate mornings. I glared up through my eyelids at the roof as the rooster crowed a second time. Stupid chickens. Shut up and let me sleep some more! By God, I deserved it after the night I had been through.

I lied there grumpily, unable to go back to sleep, but like heck was I gonna get up. My defiant thoughts were cut short by a clatter just outside the coop.

I sat up, suddenly alert. Who would come here at this ungodly hour? I listened carefully to my surroundings, and soon got my answer.

“Good morning, little chickens. It’s time for breakfast!” called a small, quiet little voice.I froze. The pegasus. Of course she would be up at this hour, she’s part bird, right?

I felt a knot of fear form in my stomach. This was bad. Very bad. I hadn’t prepared for a confrontation with anyone just yet, a way for me to let me calmly explain myself. As bad as my first impression had been, this would be an even worse impression. She had screamed and ran when I just stood and said “Hi,”; how badly would a person- no, horse- like that react when she realized I’d followed her home and spent the night in her chicken coop?

“What’s wrong, little chickens?” the pegasus called, sounding closer. “Is something wrong?”

I pressed myself against the wall, squeezing my eyes shut. She was going to see me. I was going to lose what slim chance I had to have a rational discussion, to ask for help to get back home. If I could just disappear, just for a moment… Just so no one could see me…

As I thought that, I felt something… change. I can’t really explain it; it was like, one instant I was there, flesh and blood. And then, slowly I just wasn’t anymore. Like I had sunk out of existence yet again.

I opened my eyes, trying to see myself. I couldn’t feel my arms, my legs, it was like everything had been wadded up and spread flat against every inch of the wall. By all rights, I should have been questioning my sanity at this point, or at the very least panicking, but I wasn’t. It was freaky, yet, at the same time, it felt almost natural. I was completely, unnaturally calm. I wasn’t physically there anymore, and that was perfectly fine.

But then, if I wasn’t physically there, where was I? I still have my thoughts. I think, therefore I exist, right? Something had happened, but what?

I am one with the shadow, of course.

I blinked. Or whatever equated to blinking in this state. Where did that notion come from? Something wasn’t quite right here. It was like-

Sometime during that moment of thought, the pegasus’s head poked into the coop. “There’s my sweet chikkies,” she cooed lovingly, “Come on out now, it’s time to eat.”

The chickens, who had been huddled up in the dark against the back wall until that point (geez, had they spent the entire night like that? I almost felt kind of bad. Almost. ), looked at each other and decided that the promise food was more important than acting chicken (Heh.) Obediently, they trailed out of the room and into the light in an orderly, single file line.

In that instant, I felt myself grow, in a sense, into the line of shadows trailing behind them. I was a part of that line of shadows. No, I was the shadows. The realization hit me like a ton of bricks.

Oh.

Oh this is so COOL!

The reveling in my newfound power was set aside for the moment, once I realized that the chickens were almost all out of the coop. Not wanting to be spotted just yet nor get left in the coop, I tried compressing myself into a single chicken’s shadow. To my surprise, it worked. I followed behind the next-to-last chicken to leave the coop, and watched it peck at the various seeds that were being scattered on the ground. I relaxed a little, musing on how exactly a horse was able to hold a bag.

I noticed that the pegasus had bags that rested on the sides of her back. Saddlebags, perhaps? That can’t be very healthy for her wings. She exited through the gate and tied the bag to one of the posts, a seemingly impossible feat that I watched in utter fascination. She then turned to a small white bunny rabbit, which was thumping its foot on the ground impatiently.

“I’m sorry you had to wait to go get some more carrots, Angel,” she said, “But I think all the chores are done now. Let’s go.” The bunny, Angel, looked pouty for a moment before giving a begrudging nod.

Waitwaitwait. Hold up? There’s a town? Within walking distance? This was too good of a chance to pass up. Whatever crazy town this was, there was a good chance there was someone who could help me get home. An actual bed I could sleep in. Food too, by the sound of things. I mentally clutched at my empty stomach. I hadn’t eaten since lunch yesterday.

The promise of food was just as tempting to me as it was for the chickens. As soon as the pegasus had turned away, I zipped into her shadow as fast as I could.

I heard an indignant squeak. Both I and the pegasus glanced at the little bunny, who was thumping its foot and pointing. Directly at me. Crap. I’ve been spotted. I scolded myself for not being more cautious. The pegasus glanced at me, and I froze, waiting for her to notice me.

Then, finally she shook her head. “Don’t be silly, Angel. It’s just my shadow.” The bunny’s mouth fell open, disbelieving in the utter naivety of its owner.

Ha ha! Take that you little snitch!

The bunny pouted and hopped along, keeping an eye on me while I took it easy riding in the pegasus’ shadow. I swear, if I knew how to make her shadow look at the bunny and smile smugly, I da@# well would have.

Comments

[Malesur Darkhoof]

Make shadow puppets at Angel!

[Handyman]

I approve, please do continue.

[Rhodesm96]

I was hoping for her to just stick her hand out of the shadow and flip him off.
ONWARD!

[Technopathic]

3930964 Aw man, I SHOULD HAVE DONE THAT!

[Ssendam the Masked]

Keep up the good fight!

[Blazing Shadow]

pattern wave blue: its an angeru!

[rikusorasephiroth]

3930981 There's nothing to say you can't use it to start the next chapter.

[Uberdeathninja]

About time a girl entered our ranks.

[Uberdeathninja]

3932710

Indubitably.

*smokes a pipe*

[Ssendam the Masked]

3932722
Indeed.
*subtly removes the old socks and pizza boxes strewn around the Club.*
That did not happen.
*shakes hand.*

[Technopathic]

3930971 Next chapter should be longer.

[The Harvester]

3932999
*Throws old boxes of pizzas into the distance*
Yes a girl is a nice addition into our ranks. I can't wait to see how she will proceed with her deeds of evil.

[Oro_tharr]

You fucking beat me to it! I were just starting to write on a story like then when suddenly a friends links it ._.

[Technopathic]

3934179 Hey, no one said you couldn't still write it. I, for one, would welcome more girls into this genre.

[Malesur Darkhoof]

3934179
3934357 Indeed! The more the merrier, and all that jazz.

[Rain Nero]

So, from the looks of it, our protagonist/antagonist/narrator put on a magic pendant which may or may not have at one point belonged to Luna or related to her, got poofed to Equestria, and merged with the remnants of Nightmare Moon. This is going to be good.

[Dozy Dreamer]

Again, not bad, but one minor problem;

Waitwaitwait. Hold up? There’s a town? Within walking distance?

What indicates that there's a town nearby? Because I've looked, and all I can see is that Fluttershy indicates that she's going to get some carrots for Angel.
She could quite easily be going to a nearby farm to get them.
Or are you intending for the indication to be that the main character is so urbanised, she thinks food comes from the shops?

[Shanenator]

Oh this is getting good. Shadow powers? SWEET.

[Mosqueefo]

THIS IS NEW I want that power! So cool

[Featherswift the epic]

HAH angel got what he deserved

[AlsoSprachOdin]

Fluttershy not afraid of her own shadow.
Sure has gotten better.

[Kadigan]

5960829
With the way things are going, I'm sad to predict that that's going to change, and not for the better, sometime soon...