• Member Since 29th Jan, 2012
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Chengar Qordath

I write lots and lots of horse words; everything from comedy to drama. If you like what I write, please support me on Patreon.


Things couldn't possibly get any worse for Rainbow Dash. Her job is falling apart, she's convinced that she's made her friends hate her, and even her dream of some day joining the Wonderbolts is in peril. While things are looking pretty bleak for Ponyville's coolest pegasus, her best friend and kinda-sorta fillyfriend Pinkie Pie is determined to whatever it takes to help her, and she's not going to quit until she can put a smile back on Rainbow Dash's face.

This is a side-story of "The Life and Times of a Winning Pony" which occurs after the events of Chapter Ten of that story.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 124 )

“Poopie,” she grumbled. “I looked down.”


This has to be my favorite line from the Winningverse thus far, and there are a lot of good ones to choose from. All in all, this has been a fantastic look at the darker side of RD's personality and her deep-rooted confidence issues. This was as deep as Dense Mind was fun, and I certainly hope to see more from these two.

A really great chapter all around. I wouldn't mind seeing more of these two in the future.

1558262 I agree wholeheartedly Comma. And a really great continuation of PinkieDash, looking forward to more of them :pinkiehappy::rainbowkiss:

I don't think I can stomach this today. I see romance, sad and SoL but no comedy... This is going to have to wait.
It is written by you though so I know it won't disappoint.

Winningverse...must read...it commands me

whatever happened to that story timeline flowchart thingamajig you guys were working on? Where did that thing go

Like I've said before, this story is wonderful. It hits all the gut-wrenching, emotion-churning marks that you set for it. It's the internal complexities and contradictions that make Rainbow Dash my favorite character. At the risk of tooting my own horn, I wanna quote something I had Zecora say to her “Most creatures use false bravado to hide their weakness. That behind your false bravado lies an even greater strength is your true uniqueness." I think that captures her pretty well, alongside the magnetism/charisma that you wrote of when she was whipping everypony up for tornado duty.

Please feel better Dashie!. :heart::heart::heart:

There are very few stories I really invest myself in... Your universe is something I really like and love, and I can't wait for more:twilightsmile:

This is gonna be quite a read.

As usual, you never cease to amaze me! :yay:

This was, without a shadow of a doubt, super awesomely, terrifically, brilliantly, beautiful!

The Winningverse cannot be denied, Gimli son of Gloin 1562906

Ah Rainbow..... You've made some seriously bad calls, and that's putting it mildly..... :ajbemused: But, at least you're making the effort to fix that now. :twilightsmile:

"Bungled all your bangles" I see what you did there. :rainbowkiss:

Ahh finally i get to know how RD and Pinkie are doing, been bothering me since the first chapter ohh so long ago.
This chapter also cancels out the possibility of Rainbow catching FS and CK and causing one hell of a interesting situation. (Ohh well)
Now to wait for the next chapter and pass along the info that this one is up.
Thanks for another wonderful chapter Chengar! :twilightsheepish:

Oof, this was needed. So, so needed. :pinkiesad2: After poor Dash getting, well... demonized, essentially, in the last few chapters, it's really good to see from inside her head again and see some clearer context to her actions. Not to mention that Dash kicked us off with Dense Mind, so it's nice to come full circle.

Ugh, ugh ugh ugh! Each of these references to her low libido is just killing me. :raritydespair: She did make some reference to "if we have kids, I shouldn't carry them," but she never explicitly linked her low drive to the Flight Camp incident. I almost wonder if she hasn't put it together (not that her drive is necessarily 100% due to that fight); I imagine coming to grips with that would help. Not to change anything really, but at least it could help with the healing process.

Damn, Rainbow is one lucky mare. For how depressed, defeatist, and self-harming she was, I'm not sure anypony short of Pinkie Pie would've been able to help set her straight. This definitely felt like a unstoppable force versus an immovable object at times, but luckily for everypony, Pinkie got through to Rainbow by the end. If I had to leverage any gripe, by the time they were chatting on the cloud, the conversation was feeling kinda circular, but then again, it's a miracle they were able to make that much progress in one "chapter"/side-story, so I can't really complain.

And for how patient and insistent and loving Pinkie was, it was a good touch for her to "be mad at you for a bit" after the argument. She was unflappable in her quest to set Dash on the right path again, but Dash was most certainly a "meanie-pants", and Pinkie has feelings too. Plus, it made Dash's response there all the more powerful :rainbowkiss:

C'mon though, the ending? What the hay, man?!

Tornado Day had worked.

That's a Winning Pony Chapter 12 or 13 spoiler! Now it's spoiled that Tornado Day is going to succeed. *tableflip*
((No but srsly tho, I can't wait to see how that plays out in the Winningverse!))

"the only reason i even got it"
"Saying things like that was no cool, and"

This is the perfect example of how magical friendship really is. 'Bout time you figured it out, Dash.
Great addition to the Winningverse. Once Dash mentioned a few things, I knew exactly where we were, and that, my friend, is true awesomeness - with awesomesauce.

While I really like this universe, the way RD is portrayed drives me up a wall. I really just can't accept anything she does. None of it fits her actual personality.

Good thing Pinkie didn't look down during her pep talk, falling from that height is never a good idea when the one with wings isn't at 100% Motivation.

“Wonderbolts don’t make big msess-ups like that, they’d never want a failure like me!”

You might want to fix that.

I thought this was just wonderful, even if Dash reminds me entirely too much of me. (I mean, I'm not awesome or anything, but I did once memorize an eye chart.)

Look -- this isn't your strongest work ever.

For starters, unless you're an avid reader of WP there is just no way you could possibly follow this story. I know this is a WP side story, but look at things like the FoE side stories. You wouldn't need to read Kkat's collection of encyclopedias to understand what was going on in any of them. This is quite literally a bonus chapter to WP, and I think that's the only way it could have possibly worked -- as an add-on attached to the original fic.

Number two. This is extremely angsty and lacking any realistic emotion. I know I've played the self pity cry-into-another-pone card myself a couple times, but there was really no new content here. No content at all, in fact. It basically just repeated everything we read in the last few chapters with a very, very predictable point of view with the spotlight on Rainbow Dash.

The main problem I had with this, though, was the fact that you wrote an atlas to map out your backyard. There is absolutely no reason that this story needed be told in 15,900 words, it could have been done in 4,000-5,000 tops. After the first bit it got pretty boring and repetitive. Add some muskets and you'll have yourself a full-blown Pirates of the Caribbean movie here.

I'm not going to vote on this simply because all of the above considered, my foot is both in and out the like and dislike line. Of course myself I could follow this story because I do read the fic, and it's usually my sort of shit, but on the other hand I just couldn't bear to do anything but skim through the last scene or so.

P.S.: I caught the Apotheosis reference (assuming that's what it was) you threw in there.

Your fic:
“Here?” ,,¿ǝɹǝH,,
“Here?” ,¿ǝɹǝH,, “
“Here?” H
“Here?” e
,,¿ǝɹǝH,, r
“Here?” e
,,¿ǝɹǝH,, ?
“H “Here?” ”
e “Here?”
r ,¿ǝɹǝH,,

From Apotheosis - Wind Shadows:
world's trembles the
heart under of incarnated
the weight goddess.

If this wasn't a reference, you should refer to the Hungry Wind scene to see more of what I'm talking about.

I like to read about ponies.

Haha, Pinkie Pie is best Wile E. Coyote.
And it's nice to see RD on the road to recovery. Even if you think you don't deserve it, sometimes your friends will be egoistic bastards and just forgive you.


“Fluttershy could never hate you!” Pinkie objected. “It’s Fluttershy for pony’s sake! I bet if we go over and talk to you right now she would tell you so. You just got into an argument, friends do that sometimes.”

Talk to you? Walk to Fluttershy's to talk to Dash, who is right there?

I didn’t wanna look like a desperate fangirl or anything, even I was mentally squeeing over getting a chance to hang with the captain of the Wonderbolts.

"even I was" needs an 'if' or a 'though'

“Cloudiseum Annual Exhibition in on midsummer of Nine-ninety.”

In or on, pick one.

This feels like a way to explain what's up with Rainbow Dash, and start her on the road to recovery, without breaking the Winning Pony narration by Cloud Kicker. Which is fine, and necessary, but doesn't deserve to be on its own like this. To that extent, I agree with 1563813.

I don't agree with the complaints that it was circular or repetitive. Anyone who's ever talked to someone in that kind of self-hating frame of mind knows that that's how these conversations go more often than not. I felt it was very believable, all things considered. I might have preferred to see it from Pinkie's point of view, since Dash is going to be the one that's stuck in a rut and Pinkie's going to be the one looking for creative ways to get her out of it, but that's a stylistic choice and I think this works pretty well. (Though we haven't had a Pinkie Pie POV in any Winningverse story, to the best of my knowledge, and that's a travesty!)

"Pinkie tightened her grip around me to the point where I felt like I was one of those cream-filled pastries she likes that just explode and send the filling splattering all over the place when they get squeezed too much."

Why did that remind me of Cupcakes???:rainbowderp:

Wow...I think I needed this.
Poor Dash though. I'm glad she's finally getting help and moving past all that. She deserves a little happiness after all the shit she's put herself through, and Pinkie's just the pony to make sure she gets it.

Yes. :rainbowkiss: Yes. :rainbowkiss: Yes. :rainbowkiss: Yes. :rainbowkiss: Yes. :rainbowkiss: Yes. :rainbowkiss: Yes. :rainbowkiss: Yes. :rainbowkiss: Yes. :rainbowkiss: Yes. :rainbowkiss:

Yeah, Rainbow not looking so great in the last couple Winning Pony chapters is a big part of why this got made. That, and the fact that I couldn't really do justice to Rainbow Dash's character if we're only seeing her through Cloud Kicker's eyes, because there are a whole lot of really complicated things going on beneath that multicolored mane. Rainbow mentioning that she talked to Pinkie and sorted some stuff out just doesn't have the same impact as actually seeing it.

Thanks for pointing those out so I could fix them. As for the talk between Pinkie and Rainbow, I'd have to agree that trying to talk a seriously depressed person (or pony, as the case may be) out of it can be a pretty frustrating and repetitive process. It takes a lot of work and quite a bit of stubbornness to get through to someone in that state of mind.

I'll confess to being a bit wary of tackling Pinkie PoV. Between her gleeful insanity and her ability to casually ignore reality, that would be a tricky thing to get right.

Poor Dashie. It's good to see that she's working things out.

"Blow open a hole in the space-time continuum that can only be fixed by firing tachyons outta the deflector dish after reversing the polarity?"

Great... just great! xD

But... we already know that Tornado Day succeeded. Winningverse runs parallel to show canon, for the most part.

I am very happy to see Dash make some much needed progress over the course of this, her part of Winning Pony was starting to get really depressing. Also pleased to see Redheart give an optimistic opinion on Dash's eye, that and the Spitfire pep-talk goes a long way towards helping with the headcanon issues I've been having with the main story.

Nice to see the cover art show up as Winningverse art. I saw it on Inuhoshi-to-Darkpen's deviantart page a few days ago (and promptly fav'ed it) and wondered at the time if it was related.

Bungle all your bangles?

:pinkiegasp: I smell a Gypsy Bard reference! :heart:

A great exploration of the deeper ramifications of Winning Pony's plotline, some adorable Pinkie Dash moments, and a fantastic application of the Coyote-Fudd Gravitational Awareness Principle. Thank you for this.

This is an exemplar to those kind of stories where it's just two characters interacting. No actions or explosions, just talking and full of character and feels.

I think I caught a few instances of typo here and there, I didn't keep track of them though. They were far and few in between, so it's no big deal.

I love the WP series, and I'm glad you made a separate story for Rainbow Dash's side. Even if it is just a one-shot, which makes it better. Anyway; I saw this in the featured box and clicked on it right away, seeing it was written by you. :heart: But when I went to click on the chapter, I saw it was just about 16K words. I think I almost fainted. Sure. The chapters in WP series are pretty long, but yeah; I was shocked. Considering how long it was, I presumed that it was going to be very in depth with Rainbow's emotions and feelings toward everything that happened. But when I began reading, I got a little bored in the beginning, but got into it as it started to escalate.

About half way through with Pinkie trying to help Rainbow Dash; it got really repetitive. Like, seriously. I understand that Pinkie was trying to get everything through Rainbows thick skull; but it was getting a little MEH to read. I ignored it and read it all. As I was reading, though; I kept getting confused in lines. I can't say I could point any out, but I did get lost with how the words were written at times. Especially Rainbows dialogue. It just confused me sometimes. :applejackconfused:

The ending was fine, but I expected a one-shot kind of ending; but instead the ending this story felt like it was going to be continued, but it isn't. Don't know if it'll be continued in the direct WP series, or not. But I don't care to be honest, as long as everything else ends well.

Giving you a thumbs up. Considering what I said. Even if my comment doesn't sound THAT bad. :rainbowwild: I enjoyed the story, but was confused at times...and a little bored once or twice. (SKIPPED PARAGRAPHS) < I do that anyway x) < I sound stupid. Anyway; overall this wasn't your BEST work, but I enjoyed it. If anyone says that this sucked, just ignore them. Some people have a bad habit of being overly critic on stories. Considering their made for good fun and to tell a story!

Keep being amazing, Chengar! :twilightsmile:

I really, really loved this one! keep up the fantastic work, Chengar Qordath! <3

1564747 That's because the story does continue, strictly speaking this probably would have been better placed in the winning pony story, but since its Rainbow Dash as the narrator I imagine Chengar wanted to keep the narrative consistent throughout. Thus we have a side story in a continuing series.

I was assuming that "if we have kids, I shouldn't carry them" is less 'low libido' and more 'busted baby-oven'.

Well this does bring some closure to Dash's side of the story which is always nice. I'm beginning to wonder just who exactly got the most screwed over mentally by the events of the flight camp, I mean DAMN. Others were complaining about how it could feel a bit circular at times but as someone who has gone through these conversations before from both Pinkie and Dash's perspectives I'm able to understand that that is sometimes how it goes. Overall a good story (nice gypsy bard reference) and I'm glad you wrote it, because now I can understand Rainbow's perspective in the last few chapters of Winning Pony. I hope she can somehow tell Cloud Kicker about all of this because I feel like Kicker needs to understand exactly what has been rolling around in Dash's mind for the past few years (maybe in counseling?)
Incidentally, are you planning on integrating this story with A Canterlot Wedding? If so, I'm curious how you plan on doing that.

Thank you!

I am compelled to ask if the author knows what a " filly " is?

Okay, clearly I am just going to have to subscribe to the author himself, because going this long without having heard that The Incredibly Dense Mind of Rainbow Dash had a proper fucking sequel is a proper fucking crime.

Doctor Who reference and a FiW reference in the same sentence, eh? Fuckin' A.

This. I was actually kinda sick when i read chapter 10... gastroenteritis (however that's spelled), and low blood pressure. I even blacked out at work. And that's after I'd been reading chapter 10. I suspect it played a part in laying me low! :rainbowlaugh:

So i'm gonna wait until I'm at home to read this! :twilightangry2:

Glad RD is in therapy, she sounds like she might have depression.

In other news, I am now more emotionally invested in the Winningverse than any other MLP AU.

I will say that there are a few bits of comic relief mixed in with the heavy drama.

more pinkiedash from chengar? yay! :yay:

Good use of the "F" word and I mean feather.

caved in and read it anyway. Not nearly as soul-rending as the other chapter, but still. Oi D:

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