Part 4: Conclusion
It was a very normal relationship. Picnics in the park. Standup sets. Quiz nights. Long walks together. Gifts on Hearts and Hooves Day. Visiting each other’s parents for Hearth’s Warming. It was everything that Lyra could have ever hoped for.
Well, there was one very small matter that didn’t matter. Though chaste kisses were allowed, they topped out at cheek-to-cheek hugs when it came to public displays of affection. This was because Bon Bon had an unusually conservative interpretation of Celestia’s Law.
There was no other explanation for it that could possibly make sense.
But again, that didn’t matter. They more than made up for it with what they did behind closed doors. It was a very normal relationship. It was perfect. Now all she needed was a perfect day. She waited for a while. It came.
Ponies panicked and ran around as yet another monster terrorized the streets. It was not the perfect reproduction, as the monsters were nothing more than creepy little apple creatures and the cause turned out to be Discord and not Twilight and her friends, but it was close enough to that day with the bugbear when Bon Bon confessed her secret and Lyra confessed hers in turn, later that night. The day of their first kiss.
So it was perfect enough. Lyra got down awkwardly on one knee and pulled out the ring she had bought in secret on their last trip to Manehattan.
She would remember what happened next with perfect clarity for the rest of her life. Like how anypony would remember the happiest moment they had ever lived. Bon Bon brought up a hoof to her mouth in surprise, then turned around to pull out a ring of her own.
It was a difficult engagement. Of course, the chaos that erupted across Equestria, the attack of Cozy Glow and her minions, and the return of the Windigos were all very stressful, but it was the time when the ponies of Canterlot and Ponyville separated them by force that was the hardest for the both of them to endure. But they had gotten through it. They were married now.
They were back from their honeymoon to Las Pegasus, finally getting that photo booth picture Rainbow Dash had ruined the last time. They were back home. Their home, the one they would spend the rest of their long, normal, loving lives together in. It was everything that Bon Bon could have ever hoped for.
And though she disliked admitting this, it had actually turned out even better than what she could have ever hoped for. Yes, she truly loved everything about Lyra, including her obsession with humans. But that didn’t stop her from noticing and liking that the intensity of it had slowly dwindled over the years. At first, Bon Bon would often wake up in the middle of the night to see Lyra missing from her side of the bed, and hear the muffled clacking of a typewriter from the other side of the apartment. But now she could barely remember the last time that happened. They barely ever even used Cadance’s gift anymore.
But still, there were nights like this when Bon Bon would lie in bed and look over with jealousy to see Lyra deep in an embrace with her “life-size” human plushie. She knew it was irrational. Half the time Lyra held her, Bon Bon ended up shaking her off so she could sleep more comfortably anyway. And she knew that Lyra would, if anything, be really happy if Bon Bon held her while she held the plushie. But she did not do this. It was the possibility that Lyra would prefer to give her attention to the fake human over her real wife that bothered her. But she did not say this. She knew that is not what it meant.
Of course, even on nights like this when Bon Bon felt that irrational anxiety that wouldn’t go away, she could always, at the very least, tell herself one thing that would make her feel better.
She had nothing to actually worry about because humans weren’t real, and one would never, ever, ever, ever show up in their lives.
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I like the implication that the Bearers were somehow responsible for the bugbear showing up. I'm mystified by it, but amused as well.
In any case, you paint a fascinating and compellingly different society. One sculpted by Celestia for a millennium will logically have some differences compared to the ones we know, especially in term of religion. I can only imagine what Twilight went through during her post-ascension adjustment period, assuming Ponyville has a strong fundamentalist contingent. (On the one hand, they're right next to Canterlot. On the other, that means many have actually interacted with Celestia, which can deaden the awe a little.)
Cadence is equally fascinating, and almost terrifying in her own right. The bureaucracy of love, complete with tax brackets, is one of the most disturbing ideas I've encountered in a while. Still, it definitely works to keep the cold out. At the end of the day, Bonbon's blind faith is even more worrisome. I can only imagine how Celestia deals with that lot.
Excellent stuff from start to finish. You do conceive of incredibly interesting Equestrias.
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Is this a SciShimmer reference or whatever that ship is called? I haven't watched EqG stuff past Forgotten Friendship.
Thank you! There are actually almost no such ponies living in Canterlot/Ponyville/Cloudsdale by design, and Bon Bon was only able to grow up in such a household because she comes from far-away Bronclyn. One of Celestia's overarching goals for Her reign was to transform the medieval society that existed at the beginning to the one we recognize today: pluralist, secular, and liberal. Transferring power to Twilight and essentially re-founding Equestria was the culmination of that plan. This also explains why the regal-ness of Celestia noticeably diminishes over the series run: She is deliberately trying to diminish Her role so as to make the transition easier. And yes, Twilight certainly has a LOT to adjust to, and a LOT of really big decisions to make straight out of the gate.
It's how I imagine the internal state of Princesses to be. They are burdened with all of the secrets and decision-making responsibilities of a continent-spanning nation, but not only that, they are biologically stronger and longer-lived and distinct from their subjects. How can they not be frightening?
The concept of legibility is one of my favorites, and a well I return to a lot for my worldbuilding. The more important a resource is to a state, the more legible its generation and taxation must be, so this seemed to be the only logical way for the Crystal Empire to function. Cadance's personality proceeded from that more than anything.
Also, there is a really fun irony that Chrysalis wasn't bad because she drained love from ponies. She was bad because she did not do it sustainably and equitably under an implied voluntary social contract with a legitimate government.
It's a very interesting tension. On the one hoof, such ponies are kept deliberately marginalized and away from positions of actual power, since power in the hands of true believers in anything other than power itself is unpredictable and dangerous. On the other hoof, their devotion makes them excellent intelligence service agents.
Thank you! I do try. The canon society being so different from our own and having to reconcile that really does help with the creativity.
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Yes, but the support in canon isn't as much as I'd like. Don't mind me, just crowbarring in my OTP
No one expects the Royal Inquisition!
As always, an excellent little story! Thanks for writing.
This took me to a fascinating place, made me think of things I hadn't previously considered. Asking some basic questions about setting can result in some truly remarkable interpretations of how it works. This was really weird. I loved it.
Chapter 1:
"Ponyville’s legitimate government"
...Well, that phrasing naturally has me wondering exactly why she felt a need to specify that middle word there...
"But Lyra laid there for a long time"
"But Lyra lay there for a long time"?
"They were bipedal, which reminded her of dragons or griffons"
Griffons? Interesting. Dragons too somewhat, though at least some of them seem to be primarily bipedal for at least some significant portions of their lives.
And not minotaurs, also interesting.
Oh, thought looking at the next paragraph, maybe that wasn't actually supposed to be about bipedalism, but having hands? Not sure why it's phrased the way it is, if so, though, and it still leaves out minotaurs... though more understandably, then, at least if minotaurs and things designed for/by minotaurs aren't very prominent in this world.
"The range was actually pretty similar to that of what pony skin looked like under those colorful coats."
Hm, interesting.
[looks at clock]
Thoooough I think I may need to try and clamp down on comments, sorry. I was originally hoping to be getting up around four and a half hours ago, then at least to be going to bed around three hours ago, and, ah, well, here I am. And I have more I still very much want to get done before bed after this, so much has kept coming up today... So, yes, better try to get through this more quickly, I think.
Chapter 4:
"Cozy Glow and her minions"
Phrasing that I'm sure Tirek and Chrysalis would be thrilled by.
...
Argh, no, nearly made it to the end without commenting, come on, a bunch more words to process elsewhere even came in since your previous text here!
"She had nothing to actually worry about because humans weren’t real, and one would never, ever, ever, ever show up in their lives."
And depending on which Equestria she lives in, that may even be true. :D
Well, the second part. The first part, given what Cadance thought, might involved some hair-splitting around the definition of "human" and this comment is getting longer again argh.
So! Yes, thank you for writing, and I enjoyed the story. I did take enough time to enjoy the text, I think, even if I didn't take as much time to think and write about it as I might have otherwise. And also I'm tired and my coherence may be suffering a bit, sorry about that too.
But yes, interesting story, with many interesting details, and enjoyable!
Not unexpectedly. :)
Hmm.
Well, I do see where this version was changed/improved upon over that first draft that I looked at a while back. You certainly present a vastly different picture of Equestria than in my own headcanon, especially your characterization of Cadance. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, necessarily, as it was intriguing enough to keep me reading. "Weary bureaucrat Cadance" is something I think that is unique to you and this story, along with things like canon demisexuality and the designation of different pariah species/levels of deviancy.
Bon Bon as a religious fundamentalist was another unique take on the character, but I think you made it work. Her and Cadance's conversation flowed well as a fundamentalist challenged and compromised by the contradictory nature/lifestyle of someone they care about deeply; despite the idiosyncrasies of that conversation, I think you made it work well in this version.
Had a good laugh at the rubber hands. Cadance may not want to be known as the love/sex guru, but talk about a really... hands-on gift...
Nothing I'm gonna directly point out in this one, both because I feel like everything is so connected within the story and your larger headcanon that pointing out little bits here and there loses the context, and because I gave enough feedback on the first draft that I don't have much to point out here. A very creative take on an Equestria that very much belongs to you.
Have a review, courtesy of the Reviewer's Mansion!
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Thank you so much! I will work up the courage to read it
I adore. most of all I like how Cadence avoids mistakes