• Member Since 2nd Jul, 2015
  • offline last seen 4 hours ago

Sun Sage


Life's a dance, and I've four left hooves.

T

Despite years together, Sunset has yet to meet Wallflower's parents. With their wedding only months away, it's time to do that, and more importantly it's time to know why it hadn't happened until now.

For Oroboro's Sunset Shipping Contest: Journeys.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 14 )

Soooo any one up for for delivering some punishment are one two f******ds?

That was very sweet. Your take on Wallflower's parents are an unpleasant pair of characters, to be sure, but the interaction with them is cathartic. It's natural to imagine her family background being somewhat lacking given how she ends up in Forgotten Friendship, so this was all worryingly plausible.

You definitely get a thumbs up for the characterisation. Your Sunset is fantastic, spot on. I love her rage at Wallflower's thoroughly deserving dad. (The one odd note about Sunset here is that I don't see why she'd call her fiancee "Blush" rather than "Wallflower". Not counting when she's making the sexy double-meaning command. That was a delightful moment.)

Your Wallflower is pretty believable too: it's not easy to take a character who's on screen for less than ten minutes total and project her forwards seven years, and even harder to show us both that consistency with the character we saw on the show, and how she's grown in the meantime, all in less than 5000 words. I took the easier approach of writing Wallflower while she was still a student; kudos to you for taking the harder challenge. You did a good job within those constraints!

I do love that this contest has practically doubled the number of Wallflower fics on this website :)

Wanderer D
Moderator

This was a nice read... is it bad that I wanted to see/read the whole of Sunset's tirade?

9159993
I flirted with the notion of skipping the confrontation completely, jump cutting to them on the drive home. It might have worked better, since the point was less the confrontation and more their understanding of what it meant to them. But... I also knew I was skipping it because they weren't good people... so I wanted to have Sunset get to yell at them about it a bit. This was my compromise. Not sure how well it worked, but it was fun to write. Thanks for reading and glad you enjoyed it.

9159860

worryingly plausible

Yeah... as much as I could have gone fluff and made them decent folks, I sat there asking what brought Wallflower to where she was in Forgotten. The result is a view into a family (and I use the term loosely) who wanted her in the background of their lives, because they'd never really wanted her at all. Are there plenty of other ways to become a shrinking violet? Of course, but to the extent you find yourself using memory magic to mess with others' perceptions? That, unfortunately, implies something like trauma.

"Blush" rather than "Wallflower"

Other than setting up that back and forth (which I loved)... I liked the idea of Sunset calling her that, playing on enjoying reminding her how much she likes seeing her do so. I don't think of pony names as being first and last... since it doesn't usually work. Twilight Sparkle and Shining Armor are siblings of Twilight Velvet and Night Light... the only name in common is a first name. I see plenty of fanfics call them the Sparkle family... and I don't know why. Also... I thought... 'how many people have I known for years with a 3 syllable name that I haven't somehow shortened when I address them?'. Calling her just 'Flower' would work, thematically too, but I felt like Sunset would go with Blush... for the innuendo at first, and then over time (while they still have that callback when alone) simply because she prefers it. Name and term of endearment in one.

Thank you very much for the in depth comment and kind words!

9159835
Hmm... well, that's already been somewhat addressed. These two 'socialites' just got snubbed from a pretty big wedding, one that involved their successful daughter and her successful bride to be. In the social circles they frequent, that's pretty much an asskicking. Anything more might be overkill, but if they ever realize the amazing family they missed out on, it's going to haunt their later years. If they don't... well they're miserable people and they don't deserve much further thought. Thanks for reading and commenting!

It's a pertinent question: What kind of home life leads to Wallflower Blush? For that matter, what kind of parents name their child Wallflower Blush? This is certainly a valid answer to the questions. Distressingly so. I'd hope that kind of bigotry would be at least unfashionable in 202X, but some people...

Well, the couple's better off without them. Wonderful chemistry between said couple, and a wonderful example of Sunset using her temper for good. Also, I find myself hoping for a prequel where they meet Sunset's parents. (Darn it, with a little adjustment, I could've written that. Though I'd never have thought to make Sunset a serial ear nibbler.)

Thank you for this, and best of luck in the judging.

9167103
I like to think their attitudes don't accurately reflect even the 'country club', that stereotypical bastion of conservative snobbery, but some people are very slow to change their social viewpoints.

As to meeting Sunset's parents... yeah that was definitely a more comedic slice of life type story in my head... which might be fun to write at some point. I read your story after publishing this, actually (I only read one contest entry before writing, and not this ship; I didn't want to accidentally take any ideas or be put off by them), and was amused to see forget me nots there. Then again, it's a pretty good flower choice for Wallflower. I didn't comment on it because I read it at work (thumb typing plus bad signal, so I rarely comment from there), but I loved the twist at the end, and the interactions of Wallflower as a pony. Thanks for reading and best of luck to you as well!

The parents were pretty hefty strawmen, but besides that, this was a well-written, self-aware piece. And the characterization found a nice balance in the interplay.

This was good stuff. Glad you took the time to write this.

A little lacking in nuance but I love the banter between Sunset and Blush. Also there is always a bit of enjoyment to be had in the vicarious dressing down of bigots.

SO CUTE! I love it.

The relationship between Sunset and Wallflower here is nicely realized and very sweet.

The interaction between wallflower sunset and the parents is distressingly short. The rest of the fic was alright but that leaves a sour taste in my mouth.

9739881
Sorry you were disappointed. Your comment left a sour taste in my mouth, so I guess we're even.

That was a sweet story. I hadn't thought of the sort of home life Wallflower could have had.

“Eh. I’m a former unicorn slash magic student of a princess that has saved the world with exploding rainbows... several times. Subtle is good… but it’s definitely more your talent than mine.”

HAH! self awareness humor, for lack of a better term

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