• Member Since 2nd Jul, 2014
  • offline last seen 24 minutes ago


"Inspiration does not come to the lazy. It only comes to those who call it." - P. I. Tchaikovsky



In this one-shot idea, Fluttershy asks her friend Discord if he would be interested in taking up the job as a teacher at the new School of Friendship. Discord agrees to teach them something if he were given a chance to test-drive it by having a few students to see if he would take up the job. What follows is a lesson on the meditations of Reniegh Haycartes.

A special thank you to DuskHeart13, The Hat Man and SashimiPony for taking the time of proofreading this.

Note: this and its sequels were written before "Matter of Principles."

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 135 )

More like this please =^_^=

It's good, but you misspelled "philosophy."

I remember my Philosophy 101 class. That was one of the biggest wastes of time I've ever had. Mildly interesting, but ultimately pointless. The main reason was that the professor taught philosophy from other regions from the world while including how the dominant religion influenced them, but when he covered Western philosophy it was devoid of any non-secular considerations.

That was fun and interesting.

You know, I wouldn't mind seeing more of this, since this is actually an interesting way to go about philosophy.
Then again, I had a good philosophy teacher and was one of the rare guys here actually interested in what he was teaching.

This was good. Leave it to Discord to be able to dive deep into philosophy and expand young minds in new directions.

Huh. I like this Discord. He's a complete nutcase who's beyond insane, but he's a SMART complete nutcase who's beyond insane and who's very good at proving his points.

Huh... I'm actually taking a Philosophy class right now and this story got me thinking about some other stuff I've learned so far.

Philosophy, eh?


I'm going to have some fun here.

Any course can be exciting or boring depending on the teacher. Favorite class was statistics....during summer school, at college. The teacher made it a blast.

to be fair, there fast comes a point whenever exploring any of the roots and branches of non-secular western philosophy that quickly leads to banging your head against chains of contradictory 'simon-says' narrative-dependant gameified tautologies that don't even try pretending to be logical axioms, and such examples are hardly conducive towards learning how to properly philosophize, meaning that those would be covered in the advanced courses, when the student is properly educated on the critical analysis techiqes for picking apart ordinary doublethink and sussing out the many different bits of other philosophies western civilizations used to craft their own versions, without getting subverted by/stuck fighting against misidentifued tautologies.

(Yawns) Okay, let's log on to see how that one shot I posted last night is doing... (Does so) Holy crap!


Wow. I didn't know philosophy could be this scary.

Dear 8827959 ,

I have said this once, and I will say this again. When it comes to my writings and editors, everything here is volunteer work. Since I do not have the stable income to pay for one, I’m forced to rely on others. In the past, whenever I ask someone to proofread any of my stories, I’d be lucky to get a response within a week because they are interested in it. And I’ll be luckier still, if that said editor would still won’t drop the editing altogether. So I have no absolute guarantee that they won’t do that without telling me why. Realize that editors have lives of their own, so they’re not there for me, or anyone else’s beckoning call.

Before you start asking, “Then why can’t you edit? It’s easy!” There’s a saying in my family that rings true, especially for me: “Those who proofread themselves, has a fool for an editor.” That even if I go through each and every chapter, that no matter what, the creator will overlook the flaws that he has made. And as of now, I do not have a second opinion other than those who actively send back constructive criticism in which I could actually use.

And I know what else you’re going to say: “But wouldn’t it be better if you just get an editor first and then publish them.” Given the rate in which I do get editors, I’d be lucky to post my stories at least once a year. Sure, none of my stories are flawless masterpieces, but what exactly did you expect from a website that’s willing to accept any and all stories that it gets? Shakespeare quality? Dickens? Twain even? This site is to serve a platform for any and all writers, regardless of talent to be given a chance to shine. Yes, even with my stories, they’re not flawless, but it’s better to have them then you not being able to read them at all.

Sure, some of my stories are unedited, and still are. But at least I have the courteously of telling you the readers up front in what you’re getting yourselves into. If this, or any other story of mine is going to be edited, let it be done by those that do so because they like the story itself. So, until someone comes forward to volunteer to edit this, or is willing to point out its flaws in which I can work with, I’m afraid that this is as good as it’ll get. If you don’t like it, do keep in mind that their other stories here that has a standard of grammar that’s to your liking. Although, I cannot guarantee the quality of the story.

Unless, of course, if you want to volunteer to do it, I won’t stop you. Until then or if somepony comes by, this is as good as it’ll get.

Sign, your fellow writer,


I just have one question...

I can't guarantee it but... possible?

I agree, that it's the teacher that makes a class work. Why in the past, I had failed at every math class from elementary to high school, and hated it as a result. But recently in collage I've came across a teacher that taught math in plain English. From him, I managed to get C's and B's, the highest grade that I ever got from a math class.

“Hey, if Twilight could buck the rules of some uptight, spiciest branch of the government where she could write her own book, then I could do a test run. If I like it, I’ll stick around being the new egghead in town.”

I want to see a short piece on the equestrian ministry of spice now.

This should just be a mini series with different lessons that Discord teach them, I really find it fitting that someone who can truly show his students what he's talking about is the philosophy teacher

Well, that's the best I'm going to get. Now I have an answer for you. N=undefined.

Humorously, I was just going over this concept with my teenage daughter last night. In her words, "Mind. Blown."

I do enjoy philosopy and wouldn't mind reading more. If you would like, I could take a crack at cleaning this one up a little when I get home tonight. It really isn't bad, just a couple spots of clunky wording and a few grammatical errors.

It reminded me of this.

I had fun reading this story. Keep up the good work!

Hey go for it, I'll take what ever volunteers I could get.

cool story

students with a teacher who as magical powers

it remind me of this:

or even this:

anyway great story

Oh, I was down, but that story cheered me right the heck up. Thank you!!!

Please make this into a series. This was a joy to read.

i would ask for more but this was a one shot. Sad, it was amazing while it lasted. Even so, it may not of existed to begin with. We will never know

I love the idea of Discord being a teacher, or at least a substitute for a day, especially when he makes you question reality.

I'm not going to give an entire essay about how much I agree and disagree with the philosophy of this story, but I can say with utmost certainty that I very much liked this. It makes people think, and that's a good thing. You may have done more good for the world then you realize.


IIIIIIIIII.....mmanuel Kant was a real piss-ant who was very rarely stable.
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar who could think you under the table.
David Hume could out-consume Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel.
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine who was just as sloshed as Schlegel.
There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach 'ya 'bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.
John Stuart Mill, of his own free will, after half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.
Plato, they say, could stick it away, half a crate of whiskey every day!
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,
And Hobbes was fond of his Dram.
And René Descartes was a drunken fart:
"I drink, therefore I am."
Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed;
A lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he's pissed.


I keep meaning to check out the netflix Magic School Bus reboot.

By writing Descartes plain English?

Yeah. Pretty much. If what he says is true about thoughts and thinking pertaining to the reality of something then your story is another bubble of information enhancing or increasing the existence of those who think about it. Something like that.

I'd like to agree with you on the fact that the creator often overlooks some of the flaws of his creation. But isn't an incomplete correction still better than none? As you said yourself, no one here is searching for high quality writing, but wouldn’t it be better for your stories to try to make it as good as you can? It won't be perfect, even with an infinite amount of time and resources, nothing can achieve perfection. But trying will always be better than not trying.

I can understand that you don’t have the time or the will to edit your own stories, or that it’s simply not your work ethic. I won’t blame you; I actually don’t really care about grammar as long as the story is good. But I found your comment a bit unfair for those who make their own edits, since it’s a lot of work, and often quite a bother to go through your own story to correct it.

All that and a dollar will buy you a cup of coffee.

Look, I'm not trying to sound rude. If anything, I speak from the years of experience on this site. Do not think for a moment that I don't try to polish my writing as I go or look over to see if the spelling is the way it should be. Yet, more then just limited time of the day apart from being in collage, I also have to deal with two mental disabilities in which I can't even trust my own editing. In other words, everything I put out is out is through the best of my ability to do so. I have no choice but to rely on others to catch the things that I have overlooked. For I only work what limited resources I have, both mentally and socially with my readers. Yes, it would be nice to have me edit without that doubt that I would make it worse, but I can't guarantee that it would be at the highest quality possible even if I try.

As for the: "But I found your comment a bit unfair for those who make their own edits, since it’s a lot of work, and often quite a bother to go through your own story to correct it." I do not speak for them, only for my own work. If they could go through to edit their stuff to make it flawless without anything mentally getting in the way, more power to them. But I cannot speak for them. All I tried to do is to explain the same question that I have been asked since the start.

“And take Julius Disc’s job? No thank you.”

Is this from one of your fanfics, or someone else's? I am now curious.

3 3 (N/28 + 17) – 144/3385963 (6+23(9)/144327843) = 9/8/274 14 (-42/0)

Not even Twi could solve that. YOU'RE DIVIDING BY ZERO.

He then leads them to the stage in which, as they all got a closer look, the set looked exactly like the main hall of the school in every detail except that the front has a wall of cameras looking on at them. “But it could be,” their teacher continues. “That all of this, is completely fake. That your brains are wired up to your senses to make you think that something is real when in fact, it isn’t. That you’re just imagining it as if we’re in a badly written fanfic or a children’s television show. Now once any of you consider that everything you know could be a creation of either your own mind or someone else’s, that thought is both amusing to me and terrifying to you. But,” he sighed, “legally, as Princess Twilight has decreed, that you’re not allowed to have that thought for more than twenty seconds because it will drive you mental.”

But, you're not wrong. How do you know that you're truly thinking, or that it isn't just thoughts put into your nonexistent head, that aren't truly yours.

Even if all our lives is nothing but an illusion,’ he said, ‘that there is one thing that I can be certain of. That I am thinking. I might be thinking things that are wrong, but there could be no doubt that I am the one that’s having these thoughts. Yes, a demon might have created my body, if not my whole world, but I am thinking. Which is a relief, for that means that I must exist.’He then sprouted six pointing hands to touch the foreheads of all of his students. “‘In fact, I think, therefore I am!’”

Kierkegaard and Nietzsche actually both responded to this by saying that it would be more accurate to say you know that thoughts exist, but not not that the thoughts being experienced are actually yours. Descartes’ argument in fact presupposes that some “I” must be there begin with, before it can even be proven that there actually is an “I” at all, or that what could be called the self exists in any real sense.

In that way, Descartes actually pretty solidly underestimated how much could really be doubted.

Better than Jack from AP Bio, at least. (Then again, who isn't?)

3^3 (N/28 + 17) – 144/3385963 (6+23(9)/144327843) = 9/8/274 14 (-42/0)

(A ^ was added since the quote button doesn't display exponents).

The answer to this problem is that it's, "Undefined," since the part after the equals sign is the division of a number which is multiplied by a number divided by zero (= x/v where v = y*(z/0)). In other words, N is undefined. I thought of doing all the actual math until I saw that, which made this several times easier. And even then, this is all algebra since it doesn't cover anything related to limits, derivatives, or integrals (the former two are covered in Calculus 1 and integrals are covered in Calculus 2, at least in the US). :twilightsmile:

And while that was made up on the spot, that further proves Discord's point about doubting math. That to anyone that isn't well versed in the rules, this is intimidating when in reality, it doesn't add up to anything at all.

"The next ting ta teach those kids is that that aktualy Can trust their eyes, 'cause the immutibl properties of the great fausticorn prevnt 'er from trikin' us."

"Go home Haycart, you're drunk"

Quite enjoyable, thank you.

you sir have done it so real!

Interesting concept and good execution. In honesty my grasp on reality does seem to be more in line with Yoda's but philosophy in general is a rather difficult subject to teach and while I think pushing younglings to the brink of an existential crisis to be a tad irresponsible (at least without some manner of consent form) I 'll agree it's an interesting subject to ponder.

On the whole this story reminded me of that weird Mark Twain cartoon. You could easily make this into a series of stories if you were so inclined.

I like.

but i like to add to this to you dude.

what he says is try but there should be a few things in life where it stays try.

like the word god wherein one country it means Yahweh and in another its Allah. but math like 2 + 2 = 4 and in another it will still be 2 +2 = 4 its like that book 1984 where taking control someone by making them tell you 2 + 2 = 5 and you been told that truth, is it that turth real or just a real good made up lie.

because if our life is layout for us from birth is there any meaning at all or is it that we make that meaning

I'm a little disappointed that Discord jumped straight to Haycartes without covering Dehoss first.
That said, this is excellent.

I like how Discord teaches philosophy. It can be a very dull subject in a normal classroom setting, so letting the chaos king teach it on his own terms works nicely. I would have enjoyed learning philosophy from him.

In my experience, the best teachers are the crazy ones, and Discord definitely qualifies.

Login or register to comment