• Member Since 15th Jan, 2013
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elPossenreisser


Ship first. Ask questions while shipping. Source

T

Starlight Glimmer finds out that a part of her memory has been erased. And not only hers, Twilight Sparkle’s, too.

But when they have their memory restored, they have to deal with the terrible mistake they have made. They have to come clean with Starlight’s fillyfriend Trixie, and somehow figure out with how it could have happened if they want to salvage Starlight’s relationship.

Vivid memories of the night in question are not proving to be particularly helpful.


An entry for the Two-Faced Charade Contest.


Cover credits:
Everfree Forest, Trixie, Twilight, Starlight

Chapters (2)
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Comments ( 48 )

Tell you the truth. I prefer Starlight with Twilight.:twilightsmile:

The relationship Starlight has with Trixie always tends to end up a dead end from what I have seen and read. Often literally.

Trixie is like that abusive boyfriend the girlfriend tries to say she can change. But usually ends up with the girlfriend dead.

Well that was just painful. Poor Trixie. She's completely in the right, and can't even enjoy it.

8759008
There is no foundation whatsoever for a relationship between Starlight and Twilight. They're barely friends, for Heaven's sake.

There's an Aladdin line that relates to this...

Wow. Bravo. I think we may use have a solid candidate for the winner. Just my opinion though.

8759055
"Barely friends?" Have you not watched the last two series of this show?

8759157
Of course. Haven't you?

8759162
Genie: Tell her.... the TRUTH.

8759158
Yes, and to say that Twilight and Starlight are barely friends is to ignore pretty much everything that's happened. Those two are practically family at this point. Hell, I'd argue that Starlight may as well be her adopted daughter, the way Twilight treats her.

8759173
That's overstating matters to the nth degree. In Season 6, Starlight was Twilight's student (never mind how little Twilight actually taught her); in Season 7, she was her boarder and nothing more; in Season 8, they'll be colleagues. Their relationship is well-bounded and professional, sometimes a little competitive a la Rainbow and Applejack, but hardly intimate.

You could say that Twilight initially thought she had to be protective of Starlight, but she was disabused of that notion quite early in Season 6. Starlight's a grown mare, she can fend for herself. Better than most.

8759197
So... Twilight's mother hen thing she was doing in both Celestial Advice and A Royal Problem was indicative of a "professional" relationship with a "boarder" to you? Because that totally is how a nervous mom acts about her daughter going out on her own. There's also that little detail that, upon graduation, Starlight declared that she wasn't ready to go out on her own.

Those two ain't professional by any stretch of the imagination.

8759222
Twilight in both episodes was clearly wrapped up in how Starlight's accomplishments and actions reflected on her. She was worried over her own image - as Starlight's teacher in the first instance, as the person Starlight was judged superior to in the second. If Starlight didn't surpass expectations, what must that say about her, Twilight?

And of course Starlight isn't ready to move out. She might have to start paying rent. Or taxes.

Comment posted by Starlight Glimmer1 deleted Feb 25th, 2018

8759276
Okay, um, we are clearly seeing things very differently, so let's just say we disagree and leave it at that, okay? Before this turns into an argument.

8759304
We can talk about how they're both simply awful in this story, if you like?

8759276
Oh, for God’s sake. It’s been stated more than once that Twilight and Starlight are friends, Twilight invited Starlight to go with them on their friendship retreat, and we’ve seen Starlight spend more time with Twilight than with anyone else.

8759314
Show, don't tell. Every chance she's given, Starlight chooses to spend time with some pony else over Twilight. The only ponies she'd rather spend time with less, seemingly, are the other Mame Six.

8759320
You’re obviously in denial.

Comment posted by zimmerwald1915 deleted Feb 26th, 2018
Comment posted by zimmerwald1915 deleted Feb 26th, 2018

Now I'm curious about what it was that Zimmerwald posted that got deleted.

Well, that was not at all like I expected this story to turn out. Quite an enjoyable read you produced I have to say. I honestly feel a bit of sympathy for all characters involved, though it does mostly lie with Trixie. Starlight loses some for not taking the responsibility to actually tell Trixie but that is within her character,

There isn't as much for me to talk about as I would normally ramble about. Though I'll probably say that and still not shut up. You got the characters nailed down to a T, despite the situation not being one that would crop up in the show. The two, and then three play off each other quite well. Though I do feel Trixie could have had a little more. Maybe at the start or in a flashback. Eh, minor nitpick and I'm probably being pernickety. She did seem a little quick to anger but framing it using her underlying issues with self-esteem really make that work. I liked it.

I enjoyed the ending immensely. Only time will tell how long such a ruse will work for, or how long Trixie and Starlight will last. Twilight's act was noble but it did remove all of Starlight's conviction to be perfect. She, in essence, did not learn the lesson she was about to. If you plan to do more in this little universe then it could be an interesting thing to explore. If not, then it's still an interesting, almost bittersweet note to end on.

Good job on this. I really like these three as a trio. I'm a bigger fan of the Starlight Twilight ship/friendship because Twilight is a bit more stable, which Starlight needs. Even so, I think they all in some way need each other and this story captures that quite well. Good luck on any future writing and have a nice day.

8759582
The first one was about gettIng pulled in or something and I don’t know what the second one was.

8759582
A very snippy remark that I thought better of.

Well... ah... that wasn’t really funny. And the resolution was kinda horrifying. Did you mean to tag it dark instead of comedy?

Hmm...this story is an interesting case to me. The characters are all great, well made, and have relatable personalities you believe. Everyone is in character and it's really well done. I suppose my only regret is that they are in such a sad and dark situation. I say dark mostly due to the resolution. The comedy beyond one line from Trixie doesn't work well for me, but comedy is a personal thing really.

I do desire to see this situation blow up in a sequel, but I don't expect it. I must say that this is probably darkest for Trixie, who believed that Starlight would not betray her, or, for that matter, ever mess with her mind. Like being her girlfriend would have been enough to prevent tampering with her state of existence in that manner. Sad that she is proved wrong on that. Makes me wonder if I want her to be that naive about her marefriend or not. If she isn't, there is a chance she could have kept a warning about for herself as it is clear Starlight and Twi agreed not to tell her about what happened.

So, this was a mixed bag for me, but I would love to see these three used by you in another story, as you write them each very well.

8761514
Thank you very much for this :twilightsmile: I was thinking along similar lines when working on the ending, and I agree that it's really dire for all three of them. And I had really hoped to provoke those kinds of thoughts.

You are correct in assuming that there will probably not be a sequel. I like the open nature of the ending. And I fear if I went and tried to resolve their situation (after they refused to resolve anything) it'd turn out rather grim as well.


8760428
You made me brood over my tags all day at work :twilightsmile: I guess the mind control aspect justifies the Dark tag; I personally wouldn't call the ending horrifying, but I can see where it's coming from. I prefer keeping the Comedy tag though, because I see it as sort of an un-serious story, if that makes any sense. Dark Comedy seems fitting. It not being funny is mostly owed to me failing at writing something funny. Thanks for the feedback, much appreciated.

8759857
Thank you very much! I'm glad you liked it that much, and even more how much you found to say about it :twilightsmile: I agree on Starlight not learning her lesson. I think Twilight may have learned a lesson too, but it may not have been a good one.

8759087
Such praise... we shall see! May the best cheat win :raritywink:

8759008
8759157
8759054
8759314
Thank you all for reading and commenting and being motivated to state your wonderfully divergent opinions, much appreciated :yay:

This was definitely heartbreaking.

Just read this for the competition and I gotta say... Great job!

8759197
Sorry, but apparently you live in your own little world. She is as much Twilight's friend as the Mane 5 are.

8807035
Starlight very much has her own circle of friends.

Ok, yeah, I can see why this placed. My only qualm with this story is that the beginning is so comedic I got tonal whiplash from all the heartbreak later. Definitely gonna look into your other work, now.

I keep thinking about last night, and having the…cornus delicti right in front of me is really not helping at all, if you know what I mean.”

Me: "Wait, isn't it corpus delicti? 'the hell does 'cornus' even mean?"
*heavy thinking*
Ahhh! :rainbowlaugh:
vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/mlp/images/1/13/FANMADE_Twilight_%22I_see_what_you_did_there%22.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20140218205934

I can see why this placed. Boi, that plottwist in the end...
I rather liked your Trixie. It's never easy to match the characterization on point if a show character is thrown into a situation uncommon in the context of MLP. How would Trixie react if confronted with a hard truth like this? You did pretty well there, and this was a rather enjoyable read, especially with the balance it kept between comedy and drama :raritywink:

8816299
Thank you :twilightsmile: glad you enjoyed it (and so happy that I'm not the only one who found that pun funny :twilightblush: )

Very squarely on the contest's theme, and the idea of panicking and casting a memory spell is just so absolutely perfectly in character for Starlight. Ultimately, it's really the ending twist which elevates this.

An enjoyable full-blown fiasco. Congratulations on second place!

It felt like an eternity or two had passed. Sunset and Twilight were lying on the library floor, staring at each other in shock. Despite Starlight’s best efforts she let her gaze wander over Twilight’s body as the magically removed memories washed over her.

Sunset?

8846455
... that's what happens when an avid SunLighter such as myself strays off the sunlit path. Thanks a lot. I'll cower in a corner and try to wipe off the shame now :twilightblush:

Wow, dark. I like the story, but it's a bit sad it feels like a loss-loss-loss situation... Yes Trixie would've been heartbroken and it'd take a a lot to help her feel better and all, but now we have an unfulfilled Twilight, an unfulfilled Starlight, and a Trixie that feels and kinda is a consolation prize. Sadness all around...

Holy fuck. That was a roller coaster. It wasn't one that tugged my heartstrings, but it definitely took me through a situation that ended in a very tragic end, where Twilight has to take hold of the memories, just so Trixie and Starlight can still be together in an extremely flimsy relationship.

Fuck, man. Trixie's character was fantastic. She reacted as she should: strong and LOUD. Meanwhile you have a Starlight who feels so... Starlight, that I can't help but get sucked into the story. You gave a daring situation and conflict the justice it deserves, with very solid writing to boot! The writing didn't waste the readers time, and it was so easy to follow that 8000+ words felt like 2000.

Well done. I can see why this got second.

Oh, and since I was in a call with Famous while reading this, my inner editor sparked to life (he can attest to this since he even called me so picky [PTxD]). So basically, here's some additional fixes if you'd like:

Trixie, maybe? Her fillyfriend was the only pony who even came into her room, but they had spent the last two nights in Trixie’s cart, which she had set up in the castle’s front yard.

Don't you dare forget this comma again. I actually don't care that much, but seriously, it's a clause, it should have a pause.

Maybe rather after her reading assignment. She sighed again.

I'd rather you remove that word, because it makes the sentence flow like a clogged toilet.

Why couldn’t she feel this safe and taken care offof more often?

You take care of things, not off things. This error made me laugh and uncomfortable, because it stared at me as I progressed further into the story.

Just when hasdid everything become so difficult? she wondered.

You jumped a tense. Sniped.

There was another comma error that was similar to that clause you had, but I lost it in the ether of your well-written prose.

Damn good story. Very damn good.

8918213
Thanks a lot for the kind words :twilightsmile: the fixes are very much appreciated as well, I took care of those issues :twilightblush:

Sees Title
Ok, I'm gonna forget what you did and just forgive yo-wait...damnit I forgot what I was forgiving you for.

Forgall and a pretty hard-hitting sedative. It would take her a few hours to get Starlight back to the castle, and she couldn’t risk her waking up early.

Ahem. Not to be rude but...um...did Twilight suddenly forget about teleportation?? She could literally have them back at the castle in five minutes or less....:facehoof:

9197583
I went with the assumption that her teleportation magic is rather short-ranged, say from room to room inside the castle or something similar. Which is also why they fly / float after Trixie instead of just teleporting there. According to my headcanon teleportation scales really bad for range so that beyond a certain distance even Twilight won't just be able to do it.

Hence the long way home :twilightsmile:

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