• Member Since 6th Feb, 2015
  • offline last seen 3 hours ago

Ice Star


I'm asexual. I literally don't give any fucks.

T
Source

The night that Cadance discovered the ghost of King Sombra lurking in the Crystal Palace should have been the worst of her life. Her greatest enemy is now lingering in her own home... and she knows that she's going to get to the bottom of this.

There hasn't been anything going on in the palace for a long time, and the tyrant's ghost will only prove to be a problem... won't it?


Now has a reading by Lotus Moon! Please be sure to give it a listen! An entry for Jake The Army Guy's Horse Words Extravaganza, where it ended up being an honorable mention. Now has a spoiler-filled review from the Reviewer's Cafe that you can read here! Also featured on Equestria Daily!

Chapters (10)
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Comments ( 56 )

Sombra didn't look at her. "Because I was the greatest thief of all."

I think I know why, was it because he kept stealing people's hearts?

This was interesting. Maybe a bit too short for my taste but it was interesting.

That was certainly a trip. Bizarre, melancholy, and unexpectedly adorable by the end. You didn't just make a truly bizarre pairing work, you made one work that contains one of the ponies I least like to see shipped with anyone, her husband excepted. Great work, and best of luck in the contest.

Great blend of very cute and very melancholy. Wish I could think of something more clever to say, but either way this is an easy favourite.

8230221
More likely a thief of lives.
8230228
Sorry if you didn't like the length - I intended to keep it short.
8230258
Thank you! A rare pair contest always gives me a chance to bust out some of my more beloved ships (and my equally bizarre shipping approach)... which are usually crack ships. I'm glad you were able to enjoy Cady being shipped outside of ShiningDance - I'm very much the same, where if I were to ship her with anypony else, it'd likely be in an AU. Not having this as an AU or lore-backed story was a personal challenge, and I'm very pleased with the results.

8230270
I'm glad that Sombry and Gloomdance were enjoyable to read! Who knows? They could get another story in the future...

Far future.:twilightsheepish:

8230272
I didn't have a problem with the length. I liked it and I wanted there to be maybe one or two more chapters before it ended.

8230299
I write very frequently, so there might be more of this version of Sombra and Cadance at some point in the future. However, I make no promises.

8230313
And I have no expectations. I look forward to your next entry whatever it should be.

Really dug this. I liked how you played coy with... well, most everything. Like with Shining, not even bringing him up until needed, and even then just in abstract, not directly. And the time frame was only given when we really had to know. It made for a very mysterious read, and a very enjoyable one.

Good entry, duder! :ajsmug:

8230339
Thanks for reading and creating the contest! It's the perfect excuse for a crackship mystery to pop up! :)

8230272
Hail to the Thief of lives amiright

I'm probably just going to cringe through this whole thing because my number one ship is Lumbra!
img08.deviantart.net/52ca/i/2014/240/d/0/lunbra_wallpaper_by_art_surgery-d7wzdv2.jpg

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh........

My new favorite crackship, I approve.

8231162
So is mine, but it's not like I can't write other ships I like. :ajbemused:

Oh man that was cute.

A bit depressing at first but it all seemed to work out at least.

I liked it.

8231162
I mean, same
but y u gotta be mean :<

And with this chapter, I am headcannoning this as a parallel universe to the Ice-verse (I bet it's the Ixu-verse >:3)

8246165
Oh? Parallel how?

Sombra sighed, and smiled. "You are going to attempt to keep me here until I know all these disc troupes as well as you do, aren't you?"

"Oh, you betcha!"

Literally me.

I love this ::::3

8246188
Maybe
8246199
I'm glad you like it! I might write more of these two and their world in the future, if I can.

8246206
o
8246209
>_>
<_<
Ixu-verse confirm? :D

8246211
Potentially, yes.

Here's the reading for it :heart:

8289247
Thank you so much! I've linked it in the description.:twilightsmile:

I will be adding this to my favorites on my profile page. It's already in my favorites list and up voted.\

That out of the way I would like to say this:

Bravo.

You took what it normally takes 30,000+ words to feel and condensed it into ten small bites. Deceptively small servings that when the knife and fork are down after the tenth you realize that at some point your every single need was met. As if the meal replaced hunger forever, and the imaginings of a future for these two made sleep obsolete.

In reading these words you immortalized, a pocket was made in my soul that will forever hold a story about an empress and a king and the happiness they made together.

8331026
Thank you so much for enjoying this story! It's certainly among my personal favorites and was a blast to write. I do have other ideas, if I were to revisit these versions of Sombra and Cadance, but I can't promise that they'll appear.

This version of Cadance is more-or-less how I usually write her, with a few tweaks for this particular story. She appears, in her main incarnation, in most of my other stories. Just like in this one, she shares a close bond with the version of Sombra that appears there, only it is non-romantic, and the Sombra that usually appears in my stories is a much... bigger one than this charming version, in terms of his personality. A few of his quirks were used for this Sombra... I guess you could call them multiverse versions of one another? The bond that they share in my other works and my thirst for rare shipping pairs and unconventional ideas is what gave birth to All That Lingers and I'm thrilled that you were so invested in it.

8348143
Thank you for the review!

Can you have a chapter where flurry heart, twilight etc, find out about sombra? Good work as well!

8623176
There's no plans for a sequel to this story any time soon... but there is another version of Sombra I have in much longer stories if you would like to read them - however, he's only close friends with the Cadance in those stories.

Interesting ship.... Will give it a read.

8766692
Why, thank you! I hope you like it!

8766696
Yeah... Sombra is an interesting character... I'm writing a fic featuring him and Twilight, will be posting it soon. LOL

8766711
Sombra is very interesting! I write about him a lot...

Hooray for first stories though!

This story is so beautiful and unique.
Are the little so use the ship of cadance and sombra and give a relationship credible.
You don't think in a secuel o another story for this ship.

8845192
There likely will not be a sequel, but thank you for reading!

A very somber and thought-provoking story through and through. When this story was placed in honorable mentions for that contest not long ago, the pairing seemed like a daunting task to tackle, but with your background with Sombra you made the pairing work and made it work very well. This is a wonderful story that I honestly say I would suggest to anyone.

Thank you for this piece, Star.

8932475
Thank you for reading!

I wanted to like your story because I liked the concept that came with it, but as I read on I lost interest. As Sombra revealed his character more and more I couldn't find myself caring about him. Cadence was apprehensive of him at first, but it feels like the whole "lived life as a tyrant with slaves" was too easily swept aside. Because of that I felt like Cadence had less integrity. Even putting that aside Sombra alone wasn't interesting to read about. When I read through the dancing bits at the beginning I felt like they were a little forced, too.

I know you can say this is an alternate Cadence, but the character arcs Cadence and Shining went through feel like they have more weight than a couple of encounters with a dead king. I think the story was limited in this way from the start.

8966099
I'm not sure why you didn't care about Sombra or find the version of him in here interesting, but ah well. Guess that'll happen and there will always be one disinterested reader.

Cadence was apprehensive of him at first, but it feels like the whole "lived life as a tyrant with slaves" was too easily swept aside. Because of that I felt like Cadence had less integrity.

I always liked doing more with his character than just sorta recaps of that. I've always written any version of Cadance as a bit quick to forgive and trust others, but at the same time... this Sombra is dead? There's only so much time that could really be spent on that because of the whole fact that he's quite deceased. I was going for more subtle interactions and forgiveness between the two, but I guess that doesn't appeal to everybody. I'm not sure why you feel she had less integrity, but thanks for commenting.

As for the alternate Cadance thing? This Cadance isn't an alternate one, but part of the inspiration to write a Somdance story came from the fact that in my main stories there's a platonic buddy relationship between the Sombra and Cadance there - that's the 'alternate Cadance' - and because those are longer stories with much more sprawling word counts and characterization, Cadance has more of a struggle trusting Sombra and what her friendship means with him... but the Sombra also has a radically different backstory than the one here. If that might interest you, there's some linkos on my page.

8968016
I disagree with you on the idea of forgiving the dead because of what they are. In fact I would say that in my experience with stories, ghosts seem to resonate more with characters just because they are still in the realm of the living! Here it just feels that you used Sombra as a ghost to "fit" him in the lore of the cartoons, which feels disappointing to me.

Unfortunately I think if I couldn't be convinced to like Sombra's character in a romance story, I don't think I would like him with any additional information I would see from your stories. There's nothing about him that really feels memorable to me. He seems flat, but that's my read of him.

8968016
Another nit pick here, but why would Cadence keep to herself if she knew the ghost of Sombra was on her balcony? Wouldn't she look to her friends or husband for advice? No one would make her face him alone. She isn't so prideful that she wouldn't tell them. Idk, but that was something else I had thought of while reading the first couple of chapters. I might have been expecting something exciting to happen instead of continued dialogue. The scenes feel still. Why would Cadence pick this romance over one forged by adventure and excitement?

8971196 Sorry for the late replies, I forgot I got these comments! :twilightsheepish:
It seems that you're getting the impression that all the dead are forgiven in my stories, rather than Cadance forgiving Sombra in this story because of what they go through and what they learn from one another.

Unfortunately I think if I couldn't be convinced to like Sombra's character in a romance story, I don't think I would like him with any additional information I would see from your stories. There's nothing about him that really feels memorable to me. He seems flat, but that's my read of him.

I mean, in the show he's a flat character - and flat characters have their place in writing, but I've never written him as such. If you really did want some Sombra stuff, I could recommend something else that I've read. The other Sombra I wrote that appears in more of my stories gets vastly more characterization, if that's what you're worried about.

8971209

Another nit pick here, but why would Cadence keep to herself if she knew the ghost of Sombra was on her balcony? Wouldn't she look to her friends or husband for advice?

Because as an alicorn princess, and a more experienced one, there's a chance she can handle him alone. It's established she's a very isolated widow in this story, and that her first instinct might not be to look to anyone else. She could also, y'know, be investigating.

No one would make her face him alone.

And no one does make her. She does this all of her own accord. It's pretty clear in the story.

She isn't so prideful that she wouldn't tell them.

There's not really anything wrong with being prideful. That aside, none of her actions in the story suggest that she is. She initially confronts him out of responsibility, and continues keeping him a secret for most of the story out of her own intrigue and because of their growing relationship. I'm not sure where you ever gathered that she was prideful.

Idk, but that was something else I had thought of while reading the first couple of chapters. I might have been expecting something exciting to happen instead of continued dialogue.

The 'continued dialogue' is because it's a drama. Most of the story comes from character interaction, just as most of the mystery in this story is woven with the details and emotions as clues, instead of a lot of physical evidence like in a murder mystery. If you wanted an action-oriented story, I'm not sure why you selected this one.

The scenes feel still.

Well, the story's setting never shifts from the Crystal Castle. It's implied Sombra won't be able to manifest anywhere else.

Why would Cadence pick this romance over one forged by adventure and excitement?

Did you miss the obvious fact in this story that Cadance is a widow? While Cadance and Shining obviously loved each other very much, there's nothing to really say what their romance was built off of. Cadance has been showing clear signs of depression and grief since the loss of her partner, and there hasn't really been anything to lessen that. Contact with friends and family would've had some effect, but she's still emotionally and physically isolated. Sombra, at first begrudgingly on both sides, offers her healing and a more unusual brand of excitement with his companionship and understanding. That's kinda what the story is about? Did you only read a few chapters in? Or assume all characters in relationships are looking for adventure and excitement?

Dunno what to say, yo.

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