WHAT A TWIST!

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I will never forgive you.

Ever.

Upvoted anyway.

....Dat ending... OK THEN!

This one made me chuckle of it. All-around, was actually pretty hot. Good job.

i had a strong suspicion that was gonna happen at the end XD poor shining

I really only have one thing to say right now.
SEQUEL.

Approve

7821387 ... well played Shakespearicles, well played...

I cannot stop laughing since the song part came on!!!

10 out of fucking 10!

Dear god. That song killed me. XD

To be fair, there is a chance the two sisters were screwing each other.

You and M Night Shamaylan ever work on a movie together and you will be responsible for the commitment of several thousand very confused and delusional mental patients that keep repeating "I just don't know what went wrong"

Goddamn it, Shakespearicles. Take your damn upvote.

AHAHAHAHAHA. You have my Upvote, Darn you!

Is it wrong that I saw that twist coming? Hopefully Shining can explain this some how.

Points for being really hot, but the song at the end was hardly necessary.

Everybody saying it was "quite the twist" clearly doesn't read enough of your stuff. You know I love ya Shakes, but it was obvious as all get out for a regular. Still, delicious Sparkle sibling wincest, capped off by a hilarious song. Sex and comedy, right in your wheelhouse!

Good stuff!

I leave my mouth hanging from my face and I say wtf did I just read. Great plot twist! Love the song. I liked it

"His cum churned white
in his balls tonight.
Now it's bursting from that thing!"

I would have wrote this as

"His cum churned white in his ballsack tonight."
As I was singing it... Yes, I sang it . I found that balls fell flat with the tune and saying ballsack flowed a bit more.

"Now it's bursting at the seams."

Not saying his nuts have seams or anything. But I thought it sounded nicer.

Anyways, the story was pretty funny, especially at the start.
While you could have gone without the song. I think it was fun, though there were more parts then I mentioned where it might have been polished a bit more. Like what they did to Shining's member in this story. lMAO I can't believe I said that.

I laughed way too hard at the parody...

7822386 I could have written this without the musical number. Maybe I still will. But what can I say? I felt inspired to try something new. A Musical Clop!
(Also 'seams' doesn't rhyme with 'king' in the same verse)

...I will give you an upvote and a follow on the condition you will never do that again.

My sides are now in Alpha Centauri because of you. I want you to go get them back.

EDIT: derpicdn.net/img/2015/3/25/857265/medium.gif

I'm not sure if i should be rolling on the floor laughing about that song, or killing you because you because of what you made from one of the best songs to come from Disney

Okay, a story that ends with a song,... about male rape... I honestly don't know how to feel about this.

One thing I will say is that it doesn't make sense. I can understand Cadance and even Twilight having incest fantasies, but why would Twilight want her brother to impregnate her? With how intelligent she is surely she knows the dangers on inbreeding, This confuses me.

7822668 One generation of inbreeding typically doesn't do anything. Assuming it's the only one.

Pfff. You silly, silly man

I get the feeling that you couldn't bring yourself to write a rape scene so you substituted it with a parody of "Let it go" which I can't necessarily blame you for.

No one really likes to write rape but as a writer you should push yourself out of your comfort zone from time to time to improve as a writer.

Funny enough though, I think your parody song saved the atmosphere of the story from going dark so.......bah, so conflicted!

That ending.... i have no words. Just a stupid creepy grin on my face because this appeals to my twisted sense of humor.

7822668
Magic gene checksum spell to make sure there are no unfortunate side effects

Or since becoming an alicorn it is not an issue

Or ponies could be like the juria and not have genetic issues with inbreeding

7822755 Ha! Magic Gene Checksum Spell, I like that! Only problem is that a checksum test only really tells you there is a problem, not what that problem is.

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Finding out that there is a problem is the easy step, fixing it is the fun step. Just imagine how Twilight would feel to make sure all the genes are organized in the proper fashion, think of all the check lists, check lists for days

"Simulated" Depravity. It's always the title that'll get ya.

7822888 Oh god damn, that is too good of an idea to ignore!

(sees story) Oooh, this looks kinky.

(gets to the ending)

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And so did Twilight create a spell to allow incest without complication, ushering in a new future and unrivaled population boom, requiring Equestria to expand its territory in order to maintain land and provisions for its newfound citizens. In mere years Equestria had quickly dominated much of the known world, becoming the gentle tyrants all other species had hoped they'd never live to see.

I hate you.

7822262 Well, have some comfort that I, too, saw the twist coming from a mile away.

7822264 Hardly necessary, yes. But for some people that hated "Frozen" and the song, it those make them laugh. (In all honesty I am one of them.)

7822297 Well, you don't need to be a regular reading Shakespearicles's work to see the twist coming. You just need to have read enough incest comics and stories.

Fucking brilliant. 10 out of 10 laughing Rainbowdashes for you

7822755 Actually ponies (and horses) in real life already don't have any genetic issues with inbreeding and it's a very common practice.

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I was honestly wondering when you'd get wind of this. The title is an obvious nod in honor to another GREAT FIC.

HAHAHHA!!!

At this point, her genetic structure is so far off from it's original that she might as well be two generations removed, given the extra Pegasus and Earth Pony bits grafted into it. Sibling ick aside, for SCIENCE it actually makes a twisted kind of sense, since he's also the only stallion to successfully father an alicorn in known history.

Besides, Flurry needs a playmate around her own age.

The concept is funny enough- then to add a let it go parody on top of top of that? Brilliant.

7823333 Part of me feels like that because you mentioned what the story was inspired by,he's going to delete it. GG.

That was so fucking great!!!!

I was speedreading because I just wanted to see where the changeling thing was going, them I readed the ending and my mind exploded . Another Great Twishining to the collection .

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My internal emotions are now conflicting greatly.

y tho