• Published 22nd Sep 2016
  • 5,863 Views, 68 Comments

The Coronation - Between Lines

After ascending to princesshood, there was still the matter of Sunset's official coronation. Of course, she was going to invite her friends along for the event. It went about as well as you'd expect.

  • ...

It seemed like such a good idea.

The banner outside read “Congratulations Princess Sunset,” the red-gold letters fluttering over an abandoned street, a dusting of matching confetti continuing to fall since early that morning.

Sunset Shimmer sat quietly in her booth, a slowly cooling double hayburger with fries sitting in front of her, accompanied by an empty packet of mayo and a small vanilla shake. She heaved a sigh and leaned in to take a sip, the scratching of the straw through the lid almost echoing through the silent diner. With a clatter, the askew crown upon her head slid off onto the table. She stared at it for a moment, then finished her sip and leaned back.

Across the room, the only other occupant of the diner glanced at her briefly before averting her eyes. She, her nametag said Deep Fry, was a deep midnight indigo that clashed harshly with her brown orange Hayburger paper hat. For a moment, Sunset considered asking her for a set of napkins, if only to alleviate the silence. But then she remembered she was an alicorn here, and simply grabbed a few with her magic, the rustling of the paper almost painfully loud.

“Do you have to stay here?” Sunset asked, making Deep Fry glance up.

“Company policy,” she said.

“Ah.” Sunset went back to staring at her burger.

“So you’re like... a princess?” Deep Fry asked.

“Yeeeeep,” Sunset said, glancing at the crown still upended on the table.

“So, like,” Deep Fry tilted her head. “Could you order me home or something?”

Sunset rolled her eyes. “I princess Sunset, hereby do order Deep Fry homeward forthwith by all the powers vested in me by divine right of ascension.”

“With full pay?” Deep fry said.

“With full pay.” Sunset said, conjuring a scroll stating such and tossing it to her.

“Wooo!” Like a bolt, she was out the back door, leaving Sunset alone.

“Princess Sunset,” Sunset said. “Servant of the people.”

There was the jingling of the door bell, followed by the click of hooves, and the scent of smouldering mane. Twilight Sparkle slowly trotted up to the seat opposite Sunset, and slid in, her feathers letting out an odd crinkling as the burnt tips crumbled against the contact. Without a word, she lit her horn and grabbed Sunset’s burger, stuffing it in her mouth whole. She then did the same to her shake and a generous mouthful of fries.

“That bad, huh?” Sunset asked.

Twilight held up a hoof and swallowed, letting out a long suffering sigh as she finished. “Yeah, it is.”

“Rainbow?” Sunset asked.

“Probably over Saddle Ar--” She didn’t even finish before a dull boom echoed in the distance, followed by the sympathetic clatter of every loose piece of metal in the building. “No, it seems they’re picking up speed.”

“Huh,” Sunset said. “Who do you think will win?”

“I don’t even know. My Rainbow’s always been a pegasus, but yours has had to work out without the benefit of pegasus magic.” She shrugged. “So maybe she’s more fit?”

“I think she’s just angrier she doesn’t get to have wings all the time.” Sunset scooped a share of fries for herself.

“Probably,” Twilight agreed.

There was silence but for the crunch of fries.

“What about… Fluttershy?” Sunset finally managed, averting her eyes towards the window. Outside, most of Ponyville looked like it had undergone a full scale party artillery barrage, confetti still raining down like a blizzard.

“Yeah, she… I… I think they’re fine.” Twilight’s eyes darted away as well, her cheeks turning a ketchup red. Though some of that was definitely just ketchup.

“You saw it too, huh?” Sunset muttered, a soft blush rising to her own cheeks.

“In retrospect, introducing her to a pony she’d be totally comfortable with…” Twilight paused. “Might have been a bad idea.”

“Hindsight, huh?” Sunset said.


Sunset leaned in to take a sip from her shake, before seeing the ketchup smeared straw, and pushing it over to Twilight. “Here, I’ll just order a new one.”

“I… thanks.” Twilight resumed sipping from the shake as Sunset got up to order herself another double hayburger with fries. She then remembered she’d sent the only employee home.

“Horesapples.” She stared at the fryers, still hot, and sighed, trotting over and beginning to work them herself. “Figures my first act as Princess is working at Hayburger.”

“Where’s the staff?” Twilight asked.

“Sent them home,” Sunset said. “Didn’t want them to get confetti’d in.”

“That was nice of you.” Twilight glanced at her empty tray. “Could you maybe make me another burger while you’re back there?”

Sunset shot her a quick glare, before her expression melted into a smirk. “You want fries with that?”

“Yes please!” Twilight clapped her hooves together with foalish glee, making Sunset snort.

“Of all the lessons I picked up on the other side of the mirror, who would have guessed ‘deep fryer operation’ would be the first one I’d use?” She scooped out a batch of fries and made her way over to the grill.

“Where’d you learn to use a deep fryer?” Twilight asked.

“Basically here?” She shrugged. “Except they didn’t serve hay.”

“Oh, right.” Twilight paused. “What’s it like?”

“Soft, not as much texture. Really… savory. Way too greasy, at least I thought so at first, but apparently you get a better gallbladder over there to go with the hands.” She trotted back with two fresh meals in tow, setting one before Twilight and one before herself. “Bacon’s better though. Texture’s a lot more crisp. Doesn’t… feel as weird.”

“Hmmmm.” Twilight stared long and hard at her burger, as though imagining its otherworld counterpart. She took a chomp of the patty and hummed, ketchup on her face. “I think I’ll stick to hay for now.”

“Is this place usually this dead?” Sunset asked, taking a sip from her new shake.

“Just during states of emergency. Figured I should just declare one the way things have been going.” Twilight glanced outside again. “I’m glad I ordered those new snowplows.”

“That was good thinking.” Sunset nodded. “How often do you…?”

“Wayyyyy too often,” Twilight sighed.

“Have you considered, you know?” Sunset raised an eyebrow. “Moving?”

“Briefly,” she snorted. “You ever try selling a crystal castle on the real estate market?”

“Not really, no,” Sunset answered.

“Don’t,” was all Twilight said.

“Duly noted.” She sipped her shake again.

The two sat for a while, watching the confetti begin to form drifts on the sides of the streets, the few ponies unwise enough not to leave struggling to wade through them.

“AJ?” Sunset asked.

“Arguing.” Twilight answered.

Sunset just nodded.

Twilight took a hayfry and swept it around her ketchup, mopping up the last dregs.

“How’d you stop Midnight Sparkle?” Sunset asked at last.

“Books.” Twilight answered simply. “And I left an atlas on the front desk with a few other libraries marked. We’re good for a week. Two if she actually needs these.” She pulled a pair of glasses out of her wings, before tucking them back inside.

“I’m kind of jealous.” Sunset said, before glancing at Twilight’s confused expression. “Your evil side is cooler.”

“Oh!” Twilight blushed a little before waving it off. “Nah, I mean, she comes with built in glasses. Yours is a classic, and… maybe a little hotter. No pun intended.”

“You’re into that, huh?” Sunset smirked as Twilight blushed, before taking the last slurp of her shake. “Good to know.”

“So, what now?” Twilight asked, changing the subject.

“Well, I guess they technically did put the crown on bef--” Again she was cut short as another boom echoed in the distance, nearly rattling her tray off the table. “They’re still getting faster?”

“Somehow,” Twilight sighed. “I think we’re going to be digging them out of a crater when they finally crash.”

“I just hope they don’t hit anything important.” Sunset bundled up her meal, and pitched it into the garbage. “Well, I suppose we should…” She turned her eyes to the windows, letting out a heavy sigh.

“Yeah.” Twilight picked herself up, glancing at the table before picking up Sunset’s crown. “Don’t forget this.”

“Oh, yeah.” Sunset held it for a moment, then glanced out the window again, before looking to Twilight. “You wanna just take off?”

“Huh?” Twilight blinked.

“Yeah, like… to a beach or something.” Sunset glanced at her crown. “Maybe it’s just the faux high schooler in me, but… I mean they’re all going to wear themselves out on their own.” She shrugged. “And you said yourself Midnight’s not going anywhere for a while.”

“I…” Twilight turned outside, where a pair of Rarities had emerged, screaming bloody murder at the endless storm of party decorations that was slowly burying the town’s entire aesthetic alive. Behind them, two Spikes hurried along, evidently able to tell which Rarity was *theirs*. “I know a place. You ever been to the Maribbean?”

“Nope,” Sunset chirped, finally beginning to smile in earnest. “Shall we?”

“I think we shall.” Twilight balled up her own meal and pitched it in after Sunset’s.

“You could use some sun anyway,” Sunset quipped as Twilight came up beside her.

Twilight glared at her. “And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“You know exactly what it’s supposed to mean,” Sunset answered, sticking out her tongue.

Twilight hmphed, and a moment later, the two disappeared in flashes of cyan and violet.

Empty, the only sound in the diner was the quiet crinkle of the colored paper falling outside, and the sizzle of the forgotten deep fryers.

The resulting fire was seen all the way from Manehatten.

The Maribbean, however, remained blissfully unawares.

Comments ( 68 )

Perfect story:)

I feel this desperately needs expansion. Mostly because there aren't nearly enough "human and pony analogues meet" stories out there. In any case, thank you for a delightful bit of insanity.

Never cross the streams and never let dimensional counterparts meet.

It turns out that there is no-one in all the multiverse that you will like less... than yourself as two universes' Mane Sixes found out to their cost.

Twilight and Sunset were going to deal with this by going to a hot, sunny beach, sip pineapple-and-coconut-themed alcoholic beverages and be fanned by large, swarthy stallions using giant palm leaves.

Neece #5 · Sep 22nd, 2016 · · 1 ·

7585678 twilight is into bipeds. And flaming girls. Therefore they'd be fanned by a mix of bishounen minotaurs AND sexy stallions. If that's how sunset swings, that is.

7585612 don't be silly, that's how the BEST parties start! Also horrible, GLORIOUS drunken decisions :pinkiecrazy:

Ha, I love this kind of story. Considering how much chaos the Mane Six can get up to (Best Night Ever for instance), doubling the Mane Six probably wasn't a good ideal in hindsight. Too bad none of the Mane Six sound like they're getting along, but then they would probably either get along instantly or all the similarities would drive them crazy (or in Rainbow Dash's case, immediately race to see who is more awesome).

Wonder where Celestia went off to. Then again, considering her advice in Best Night Ever, she's probably long gone (and Sunset and Twilight follow her royal example).

Oh, I think the Fluttershies are getting along well, based on the alicorns' blushes.

A little too well.

Okay this was a great story, very funny to see how Sunsets first day as a princess is going :D, and i love how the ending with Twilight and Sunset pretty much taking there old teacher's example of how to act in states of emergency and panic, i wouldn't be surprised if Celestia isn't already at Maribbean sunbathing on the beach.

I would have liked a few more details on what the others were doing, but I suppose less is more here.

I really want to see another chapter that opens with "A few hours earlier..."
Or even better, "One hour earlier..."

It couldn't happen any other way. :rainbowlaugh:


I guess this is what Celestia meant by 'upsetting the balance' in the first movie huh?

...THIS is how you do "Offscreen chaos". Give just enough information that you can fill it in.

As opposed to what, you know, Suicide Squad did. (Just...not HAVE anything to it)

It's never a good sign when your movie has "kill yourself" basically built into the title. Saves the reviewers too much time.

This was pretty amazing.


I confess, what i disliked mos about it?


The Fluttershys are getting along.

7585586 I feel that too. I like this one. Nice and fluffy.

uh i feel like things are unexplained and why mention midnight sparkle when uh she was turned back into twilight

and sunset would not eat meat she is a vegetarian for obvious reasons

i'd love to see what lead up to this, great story!

7588630 But shes the bacon horse, surely she must have sampled sometime in the human world

When there's two of certain characters interacting with each other, you know that something is going to go wrong. Sometimes it will work out and the pairs hit it off, but then other pairs end up causing a disaster or two. Sunset and Twilight did the right thing by going off and relaxing because trying to resolve a problem like they have would only have given them more stress than they needed. That and they don't want to deal with impending disaster.

7588773 Well... here's hoping the place she sampled wasn't Burger King.

It's Horsemeat by the way.


You know, I don't get why French fries should also be made of hay in Equestria. I mean, they're not meat... shouldn't ponies still eat potatoes? Also, it seems kind of redundant to eat hay with your hay. That'd be like having steak with a burger, or cheese sticks with your grilled cheese sandwich.

Comment posted by chuck-vic-norris deleted Sep 24th, 2016

You can't have too much steak and a grilled cheese sandwich never needed bread in the first place.

very funny story, it took me a bit to realize the confetti wasn't just the ponies of Canterlot celebrating a new princess but instead it ws Pinkie Pie squared

There's something absolutely hilarious about just showing the aftermath without explaination of all the events. Love it!

I loved this! :rainbowlaugh:

I wonder what the AJs were arguing about.

7589355 you say it as though either of those is a bad thing...

As far as potatoes.... Potatoes are actually toxic to horses. Ponies, too, obviously.

I was curious about the same thing a while back so I googled it and voila!


Such fun, packed into so little space...

You have too much skill.

7589937 apples, its always apples.

This was pitch-perfect. I can only be sad we'll never get anything like this in canon.

Awesome work, well done. :twilightsmile:

“I’m kind of jealous.” Sunset said, before glancing at Twilight’s confused expression. “Your evil side is cooler.”

That would actually make for an amusing read too, they all comparing their dark sides. :derpytongue2:

7590186 I'm sure when I get my multi-chapter story rolling, you will see that my skill extends ONLY to compact stories :rainbowlaugh:

7589955 It's a nice theory, but that article doesn't actually help much in the context of hayfries:

Solanine and chaconine are toxic and are the potato’s natural defense against predators. These compounds would be toxic to humans too except that we cook the potatoes before we eat them; destroying solanine and chaconine and rendering them safe to eat.

The reason humans can eat potatoes and the reason MLP ponies would also be able to eat potatoes is the same: They cook them first.

I'd say the real explanation comes down to "hay just tastes better". Who knows? Maybe if humans were capable of digesting hay, we'd prefer the taste of fried hay over that of fried potatoes too. ;)


Ever gone to a Mexican restaurant and had a side order of nachos with your tacos/burritos/etc.? The ingredients list for all those dishes is practically identical, but the way they're prepared makes the end result different enough that they go just fine together.

7585586 Actually there ARE a few, some of the good, some less said the better, some left for dead or on extended hiatus(?) but VERY BLOODY FEW WITH THIS MUCH POTENTIAL!!! And it's a one shot.:fluttercry:
7587533 and LATER!

At least the Fluttershys are getting along. :rainbowwild:

7590768 Part of the reason we don't eat hay and such is that we can't digest cellulose, which herbivores like horses are able to. So since they can digest cellulose into sugars and such, I imagine the substance would taste to them the way starch and carbohydrates do to us.

So in essence hayfries would be french fries with equal taste and better roughage.

They'd probably find the texture more pleasant too, being grazers and regularly eating tougher grasses and plants, just as we usually prefer the soft texture of cooked potatos, being omnivores that evolved eating meat and fruit.

But at this point I'll admit I'm engaging in so much supposition I almost might as well be making stuff up XD

7590768 I actually haven't done that, but it's more a matter of personal taste and how much I eat. I see your point, though--the fries would be, well, fried (and salted), while the burger would be grilled.

I love potatoes, so I can't understand why ponies would forgo them for something they're already eating, even if it is prepared differently.

I would love to see what happened before this.

So the Rainbows are racing, Pinkies are partying, and Rarities are fashioning (?)

So what are the Fluttershys doing and AJs arguing about?

Way too greasy, at least I thought so at first, but apparently you get a better gallbladder over there to go with the hands.”

Horses* don't have one at all to begin with.
*might be different for the technicolor ponies ;)

7591060 I do believe the implication is that the Fluttershys are banging

7591855 One is better than none! Though I assume ponies have at least some form of one considering they appear to have fried food, and gallbladders are for lipid digestion.

They could like it but still not be able to eficiently (as the enzymes are secreted by liver anyway) digest fats.
Kind of like adult house cats that like (cows) milk.
But that's not really important topic to waste time. :trollestia:

Fun idea. Though, I can't help but feel there is a lot of wasted potential here - like Sunset and Twilight are just discussing a far more entertaining story going on somewhere in the background.

Also, while I have no doubt a double set of Mane Six could easily result in some comically wacky scenarios, most of the ones implied here seem a bit too over the top. More extreme doesn't necessarily mean funnier - the best jokes are often on the subtle side - and sacrificing characterization for humor is never worth it as far as I'm concerned.

Speaking of weird characterization, there is no way Twilight would ever just walk away from a major incident involving her friends, especially if it causes trouble around Ponyville, and I suspect the same holds true for Sunset.

Over-all, I can see what you were going for, and it's not bad. It just doesn't really do it for me. :applejackunsure:

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