• Member Since 4th Jan, 2015
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Damaged


Pithy Statement

Comments ( 153 )

Hmm, you have caught my interest... Again...

Well that explains why the guards are all alike. But I wonder how Celestia will feel with a Element of Harmony complaining?

7535960 Glad to hear. :twilightsmile:
7536086 Sounds like you are going to have to read on to find out! :trollestia:

A rooster crow - A rooster crowed

*****

It's off to a sad start. I'm eager to read more and learn about what is going on and why.

7536086 Try "a fellow Princess complaining." :rainbowlaugh:

Definitely an interesting take on the armour of the guards. Truly altering the shape instead of being an illusion. I look forward to part two.

7536178 Yeah I can see Applejack going to Twilight. I can also see Luna looking at the roster and going "Oh I'm keeping this one!"

He fumbled in his mind for what Cheerilee had told him, about 'old factory' senses being the strongest.

Either you're going for Mac's take on what she said or it should be 'Olfactory'?
img02.deviantart.net/7693/i/2014/242/8/d/flying_royal_pegasus_guard_by_chainchomp2-d6774jq.png
7536847 img1.derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/8/29/413739__safe_shipping_princess+luna_comic_big+macintosh_kissing_hug_idw_spoiler-colon-comic_t-dash-shirt.png

7536986 Yes, it is a play on 'olfactory'. :twilightsmile:

7537005 Just checking. wasn't sure. :twilightsmile:

7537021 Heh, first time I heard that joke was reading Anne McCaffrey... dang, now there was a writer.

7536847 Hahaha absolutely. "Oh my, we're definitely stealing that one, Sister!" :rainbowlaugh:

7538219 Thanks for the feedback. Yes, this TF was a little rushed, the main event is coming, what more changes will happen? Well, I guess you will have to tune in for the next chapter. :twilightsmile:

7538234 I did. And I will offer a little spoil... there will be two TF/TGs happen

Oh, and update schedule on this story is presently "Saturdays", so not too long to wait.

7538255 I have it in the spoiled tags in the description.

Well, this is an interesting story so far, I like the idea that Equestria has a mandatory military service for all stallion, and would explain in part who they can maintain peace in their borders against major threats and that all ponies can be call to defend their country at a moment notice and would explain why we see so few stallions in the show most are doing their military service. For the story itself as it has been said the ending had been rushed and ruined the mood denial and resignation that you had set up at the first haft of the story. I think that the actual transformation should have been done when big mac reached booth camp where he would had had a physical examination at least to see if he could undergo the transformation or not and be monitored thought out the whole process, and swear allegiances to the crown. If he had to do thought a transformation before reaching booth camp, is he had to go to the doctor and be given special medication to prepare for the firsts stages of the transformation over a period of a few weeks.

what I would wander is if the transformation could be permanent or not.

I hope the next chapter will be even better.

Interesting idea. One thing I hate about this is the fact that you're spelling his name "McIntosh"


So, this is conscription and the enchantment on the armor aren't just cosmetic or illusions?

I wonder if it's permanent.

7541217 I spell it that way for the same reason the show does, a McIntosh is an apple, a Macintosh is a computer.

7541289
It just annoys me. Because his nick is Big Mac, his full name should be Big Macintosh.

Seeing "McIntosh" frustrates me.

Also, you can't trust everything on wikia.

7541859 Right, but "macintosh' is not a breed of apples. I could see his name possibly being MacIntosh at a stretch, but "Mac" as a shortening of "McDonald" or other such last names is not uncommon, here at least. Question is, why would he be not named after an apple?

7541885
Like I said, it just annoys me. Looking at it, it annoys me. To me, it looks wrong, like a typo.

Anyway; more!

7541908 Heh, I grew up in an area populated by a lot of very traditional UK named families. O'Brians, McDonalds, and a whole lot more. McIntosh is pretty standard fare.

Also note, "Mac" is actually a nickname for the McIntosh apple.

Comment posted by eraser deleted Sep 10th, 2016

Interesting chapter, I still wish their had been more thoughts on how the story would pan out and go into more detail about on how the guards go with the training, I don't think that just slapping on some armor would be enough to make them a pony proficient in using his new body, without going thought extinctive training. I just think that the idea that you have brought is interesting and open a lot of opportunities to explore this subject as a story an you could squeeze a lot more contain if you wanted to.

7553802 This is not a story to go into depth about these aspects. I gladly invite other writers to use and abuse these ideas for themselves if they wishā€”and let's face it, I would read the heck out of it if they do. A spoiler about this world (do not mouse-over if you don't want it), but this is the land of Molestia and Lusty Luna, their motives in all this is titillation, more so than actually having guards.

Comment posted by eraser deleted at 8:49am on the 11th of September, 2016

Why is it I find "Eraser" deleting their comment far funnier than it should be?

7553833 Again, this was never meant to be something in-depth. I wanted a little story with some fun for the TF/TG fans out there. It has a some plot because I would rather stop writing than write completely plot-less clop. Please, anypony who likes these ideas, please expand on them (and link to your stories in here).

Oh I can't wait for Celestia and Luna to start fighting over Big Mac and Twilight and Applejack to get caught in the middle.

"You know, if you had worn that armor for a day, the form gets locked on much more securely, we are lucky I found you so early."

Ah, so the transformation is temporary, but after a day it becomes permanent? Am I right? Please tell me I'm right. I don't like being left.

7553859

Comment posted by eraser deleted at 8:49am on the 11th of September, 2016

Why is it I find "Eraser" deleting their comment far funnier than it should be?

XD

7554978 Pretty much. Once the form locks on, only an alicorn could remove it.

I wrote something. I would be honoured if you would red it and tell what you think. It's called Book Horse. which is hopefully a place holder until I find something more meaningful.

7555254 When I asked for links, I meant using any of these ideas. It's cool though. :twilightsmile:

7555284 I guess I missed something. I honestly have no clue what links you are talking about. I just had the thought of "hey this guy writes these stories all the time. maybe they'll like mine. " so I'm terribly sorry if I messed stuff up in someway.

7555318 Nah, it's perfectly fine. Good luck with the writing, don't stop! :twilightsmile:

Applejack, applejack, Celestia already broke the contract by way of not being capable of releasing Big Mac from her service! Therefore, you are not bound by your side of the agreement!

Yeesh.

Applejack let got first.

What the?

Her other guard never talked to the echo in their armor, but here she saw mac doing just that.

Mac

7572837 Some people like a little bit of a surprise, others don't. This makes all of them happy.

7572814 Fixed, thanks!

7573217 Yeah, I admit to this. The whole story was basically "A thing rattling in my head that I needed to write down". Thanks for taking the time to comment, but I don't think I am going to spend more time on this one. It was just... I needed to bash it out, it was pure catharsis.

7573335 No need to apologize, your opinions are not just your own but correct. Thanks for taking the time to read a silly musing. :twilightsmile:

All I can say in response to this story is

-shrug-

Your done with this story already?

7573244

Shame, while the setting is eyebrow raising, there certain is room for additional stuff here, even if it's "months/years later" kind of thing, or just snippets of interesting moments.

yer gotta - y'gotta --or-- yer goin' ta

there were a very few guard - there were a very few in the guard

Applejack grit his teeth - Applejack gritted his teeth

*****

This was a fun little adventure!

I hope you continue it someday, maybe just a few snapshots of key moments as they both serve their time.

Is there going to be a sequel for this?

7607750 Not at the moment.

7607779 What I meant was, there are no plans to continue this in any way. It was just a little idea I wanted to get out of my head.

7607819 ok can you make a another chapter bout what happens to both Applejack and Big Mac's when they doing theirs serve the princesses as their royals guards (aj in the day guard and bm in night)?

7607829 Well, I wasn't intending to, but I am open to commissions.

https://www.paypal.me/TheDamaged/20usd

Click the link, follow the prompts, and I can write all kinds of naughty things that they get up to in their respective guards. :twilightsmile:

That is, $20 per chapter of 2k'ish words.

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