Dear God, What Have I Done!?
It was the end of another week at Canterlot High. The students were all eager to head on home to just chill out and relax for the weekend. But as typical of school, they'd end up doing their homework anyway. However, for one student, making the decision for what to do on a Friday evening just couldn't be decided.
Sunset Shimmer took a seat on the stairs leading to the front doors of the CHS front building, and was having trouble deciding what to do. She checked her book for any messages from Princess Twilight and got nothing, and all of her friends were all busy for the weekend, so that throws another sleepover plan out the window.
"Hm... an entire night to myself. Maybe I can see a movie."
With that, Sunset hopped onto her motorcycle and rode off towards the small town in Canterlot.
After making a bit of a short journey, she parked her motorcycle in front of a store named 'Rent N Watch'.
Once she stepped inside she looked and saw it was about as tpycal as any regular video store. There were DVDs and VHS tapes all set into shelves marked from alphabetical order, as well as the genres they belonged in. She could also see some other movies in display in the glass counter that the manager was standing behind.
"Good afternoon miss, how may I help you?" The manager asked.
"Oh I'm just looking to see what you have. Since I'm gonna be by myself this evening I'd thought I'd turn it into movie night. You have any suggestions?"
"Well miss there are quite an amount of movies to pick from. You got action movies like Star Wars, Jurassic Park, Aliens. And you got historical movies like Man in the Iron Mask, Amadeus, and so forth. What kind of movie are you looking for?"
Sunset simply shrugged. So she scoured through some of the shelves coming across some more old VHS tapes, and a few other DVDs.
"Lets see we got Zombie Nightmare, Beast of Yucca Flats, Laserblast--"
Sunset was then interrupted by the manager.
"Terrible name for laser eye surgery. Scares away the customers," he joked.
Sunset giggled slightly and continued to browse through the movies, and she came across one that gave a bit of interest.
"Hey, what's this one?" Sunset asked.
The manager walked over to see her selection and his eyes bulged out.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa... I'm not so sure you want to pick that one. Maybe something else?" The manager stammered.
"Well, why not?"
"Well, I shouldn't say this but um... most people who seen this movie, usually go nuts afterwards. This is literally the worst movie existing in this world. It is so bad, it is so awful, it is impossible to sit through." The manager freaked.
"Well I would like to give it the benefit of the doubt." Sunset beamed. She wasn't gonna let some manager's words get in her way of a Friday movie night.
"Very well..." The manager nonchalantly replied.
So Sunset handed him the rental card, and got the movie for her Friday viewing.
After popping the popcorn in her microwave, opening her soda can, and plopping a seat down on the couch she began eating her food to begin the viewing.
'Maybe this movie won't be so bad afterall.' Sunset thought to herself.
One Movie Hour Later...
Sunset's soda was now empty and crushed on the coffee table, her popcorn had fallen onto the floor, and her face was expressed with a great amount of terror. No wonder the manager told her to stay away from this horrendous atrocity.
"Sweet Celestia, what cruel god would make this movie?" Sunset talked to herself.
Sunset now found herself scarred for life. No movie could be that awful, that terrible, that horrendous, that atrocious, or cringworthy to watch...
Once the next day at school hit, the 6 friends minus Sunset were all talking about how their weekend was.
"So, what did you do Pinkie?" Applejack asked.
"I threw my sister Maud a birthday party! She loved it!" Pinkie smiled as she jumped into the air with glee. "Although there was quite an amount of chickens I had to catch."
They giggled at Pinkie's reply. She always had lots of humorous and witty things to say.
"What about you Rainbow Dash? You did tell me you and the Wondercolt team had that game."
"Oh yeah, we won!" Rainbow made a fist pump in victory.
"Yay." Fluttershy cooed.
"Does anyone know what Sunset did? I tried talking to her Saturday, but she wouldn't pick up her phone." Twilight responded.
"Well there she is now, maybe you can ask her." Applejack replied.
Sunset without any emotion on her face except for traumatized, sat down on the table, and just stared on into space, not listening to any of the girls next to her.
"Um... Sunset?" Twilight asked.
"Are you okay? You look like you've seen a ghost." Applejack replied.
"Or walked in on the boys bathroom." Rainbow replied, getting an awkward stare from everyone.
"It happened to a friend of mine..." Rainbow blushed in embarrassment.
"So....terrible...." Sunset droned.
Now the girls were starting to get worried. What could have happened to Sunset that would make her act like this?
"Sunset, did something bad happened?" Fluttershy asked.
"...I'm not sure.... I don't know what bad is anymore..." Sunset quietly replied.
"Did someone rip a band-aid off right in front of you?" Rainbow asked. Still no reply came from the horrified expressed that continued to stay on Sunset's face.
"Attacked by bats? Fell for the old 'bucket of water on the open door' trick? Played the scary maze game?" Pinkie asked.
"... No." Sunset replied.
"Got beat by Adagio in a round of strip poker? Fell through a roof? Shot a nail into your foot?" Rainbow asked.
Soon Pinkie splashed water from her cup into Sunset's face which finally snapped Sunset out of her trauma.
"Dah... Wait, what day is it?" Sunset asked.
"Monday, silly!" Pinkie replied.
"Wait, what were you girls asking?" Sunset inquired.
"We were asking you what did you do this weekend darling. You seemed incredibly traumatized." Rarity replied.
Sunset then wiped the water droplets off her face with a napkin, took a deep breath, and spoke. "I may have seen a horrible movie Friday night," she hesitated.
"The Room? Battlefield Earth? Garbage Pail Kids?" Pinkie asked, followed by a curious Rainbow Dash.
"The Beginning of the End? The Last Airbender movie? Alien 3? Disaster Movie?" Rainbow asked.
"No, none of those movies. Its... Its... Ugh. I watched..." Sunset groaned while face palming.
Sunset told all of the girls her misfortune of picking out a terrible movie, and they all groaned and made 'ohs' in response. They all were cringing after hearing the title of what she had just been revealed. Pinkie cringed so much she had turned her toes inward and her face was green with disgust.
"Oh Sunset, why did you see that movie?" Applejack asked.
"I don't know! I was curious!" Sunset moaned.
"That's what we told Pinkie about that bottle! Just because it says 'cherry' on it doesn't mean it actually does like cherry!" Rarity replied.
"Don't remind me..." Pinkie whined.
"Why in heavens did you see that film darling?" Rarity asked, clearly sounding distressed.
"It looked interesting!" Sunset fought back.
All of them slumped back in their chairs. Now that they know this was told, their lunch time had officially been ruined.
"So... anyone want to see it with her to get our own taste of it?" Pinkie asked.
And with that question, Sunset couldn't help but fall onto the floor fainting at Pinkie's question. She just had to ask that....
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Totally Mortal Kombat Annihilation.
Probably not birdemic, while bad, it's not scar you for life bad.
My money's on Baby Geniuses. Yes, the first one, even though the sequel (WHY?!) is in IMDB's bottom 5 worst movies.
There was this one movie I saw once that was really, really bad. But it was so bad I have blocked the title from my memory.
Anyways there are two somewhat recent movies I can think of: Food fight or AVP2
I bet my money on the utterly terrible and disgusting anime ova: GYO: Tokyo Fish Attack
Dragon Ball Evolution or The Last Airbender
Sharknado
Freddy Got Fingered, Bio Dome, something made by Uwe Bowell, Movie 43
The Room by Tommy Wiseau.
Dragon Ball evolution?
Human Centipede
Star wars holiday special.
Schumacher's Batman and Robin?
Food Fight, definitely!
7429558 YES. YOU'RE RIGHT. Probably, anyways.
Food Fight. There is no movie worse than that.
Can you even call it a movie?! I got cancer from that shit!
Southland Tales.
Fant4stick.
The only movie I've EVER seen that I actually dislike.
I am calling it now... "The Hand of Manos"!
And barring that, "Troll 2" or "The Highlander 2: The Quickening."
Garbage Pail Kids.
7429537 they already asked the room, in the fic she said no though Im going with Son of the mask, that one is terrible maybe norm of the north or... A minty christmas
A movie like this one I feel should be universally bad, something that anyone, without prior knowledge agrees is a horrible thing. Thus Mortal Kombat Annihilation, Dragon Ball Evolution, Star wars holiday special, The Highlander 2, Fant4stick, or The Last Airbender wouldn't really qualify as a large part of their awfulness is derived from them crapping all over beloved properties that it'd be debatably if Sunset had enough of a sense of nostalgia for to be truly offended over. Uwe Boll's work could be seen as exceptions, since they rarely adhere to the licensed title's original content.
No, you want something that is a more universal definition of suck, something that can be regarded as bad without any background besides the movie itself. The Room, Birdemic, Baby Geniuses (or immediate sequel), Freddy Got Fingered, Food Fight, Manos (though I hear the full, non-MST3K version is terribly slow and boring) are good suggestions since you don't need to know anything else about them. Then there's also things like Leonard Part 6, Yor, The Taint.
How has no one mentioned Toll 2 yet?
(Edit: Posted just after 7429592 got there)
For my own, I think you need to go obscure or rare to get really bad stuff. I'd say John Waters' Pink Flamingos, The Amazing Bulk, Crazy Fat Ethel, or anything of the Schizophreniac series. Actually, I'd say Actium Maximus. That is theoretically a film, though it fails on virtually every level.
If the girls want Sunset to feel better, they can watch Miami Connection. It starts off with ninjas killing drug dealers and then goes to a song about friendship and making your dreams come true!
Okay, change of thoughts: Titanic the Animated Musical (you know the one
).
Gaaargh! If it's not any of the movies said in the fic, there's SO many others it could be! But which horrible film could be so terrible to traumatize her until the next morning?!
Troll 2, Santa Claus Conquers The Martians, Foodfight, the Star Wars Holiday Special, Dragon Ball Evolution, Birdemic: Shock and Terror, Batman and Robin, Norm of the North, the animated Titanic movie, what, WHAAAAT?!
It was Batman and Robin wasn't it?
Futz?
The Creeping Terror?
Nah. That one's stupid, really stupid, but not horrible.
Space Mutiny?
Again, stupid, but not horrible, no matter what Mike and the Bots might have said.
Robot Monster?
Lets see:: nonsensical plot, terrible ending, and a monster that looks like a man in a gorilla costume wearing a diving helmet. It's a pretty good candidate
The Last Airbender?
It outright murders one of the best cartoon series of all times, so it's a pretty good candidate.
Leonard Part 6 ?
Hilariously bad storytelling, terrible jokes, and a strange disdain for vegetarians. This could very well be the one.
Freddy Got Fingered?
Forget what I said earlier; this has to be it. Unlikeable characters, disgusting jokes, and depictions of bestiality.
Can you give us a clue? Parody name of the star, or a very basic plot point?
7429689 "Batman and Robin" wasn't that bad. Yeah, it was the worst of the live-action Batman movies, but it could be worse. It could have "Foodfight" levels of bad.
7429570
Well, it broke Nostalgia Critic and JonTron.
Megashark vs Crocosaurus?
7429780 Well it had the Nostalgia Critic try to commit suicide and also try to go on a murderous rampage. So I would say it's pretty bad.
7429799 True.
7429828 Yes, but have you seen Foodfight? The Nostalgia Critic literally had a mental breakdown after he learn that review was all for nothing.
Plus, the NC is known for exaggerating (it is a comedy series, after all).
7429799 Trust me when I say that every single movie mentioned here has NOTHING on the awfulness that is 'Where The Dead Go To Die' by Jimmy ScreamerClauz. Animation worse than a PS1 cutscene, horrendous acting, fucked up imagery and themes to the nth degree, no sense of story or any kind of narrative structure, not one single likable character to be found, everything in that movie is just wrong in every possible way.
7429871 I'm sorry my story didn't please you.
One-shots just aren't really my thing. I was giving this a try.
7429885 Eh, keep practicing, learn by reading, and so forth.
7429780 I don't know, man. BVS was pretty bad. I can actually go back and watch Batman and Robin.
7429638 the one with the rapping dog?
7429904 Technically, Batman v. Superman is not a Batman movie, neither is it a Superman movie. BvS is a Justice League movie.
MythrilMoth's right. You gotta fix some things. But this was a nice quick read for me.
Also, shame on you people. Have you forgotten about Jack and Jill?
Story of my life
this must be talking about this movie
impawards.com/2016/posters/ghostbusters_ver6.jpg
Movie 43, The Rules of Attraction, Gigli...
Food Fight
I'd say Norm of the North but it's not even on dvd yet
Sunset obviously watched Frozen.
the avatar the last airbender movie
*cringe*