• Member Since 4th Aug, 2014
  • offline last seen September 20th

a sick depraved bastard



T

Trigger warnings: no sex, brief raunchiness, consent is not one of the reasons
(One of these days I'll figure out how to write consent.)

Everyone dreaded when Pinkie Pie was "it" in Truth or Dare. Already much clothing had been lost. And there were few secrets Pinkie Pie didn't know about the girls now.

Only one had yet to be broken.

"Truth… or dare?" Pinkie Pie said, menacingly.

"Truth," Sunset Shimmer replied.

Pinkie Pie took a breath, and then said the most embarrassing and raunchy question she could think of.

"Do you wanna screw a horse?"

What happened next would change all of their lives forever.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 81 )

How... interesting. I think needs some follow up. like, sunset now needs to talk things over with each of her friends, because it was left just... awkward.
I would express the same thoughts if this story had been about basically any orientation or (for lack of a better word) kink.

Of courseFluttershy
Pretty good. Gotta love slightly racist friends.

LOL!!! Wait, Sunset said if she was straight...so she likes girls... WELP the girls blew any chances of going out with her now...Still some nice girls out there Sci Twi or the Dazzlings.

...What?:rainbowhuh:What?:rainbowhuh: J-Just what? :twilightoops:Is it bad that I'm laughing at this but stunned at the same time? :rainbowlaugh:Also, this seems close to M in a way. Still, here's a like.

"Sapient," someone inevitably corrected.

:rainbowlaugh:

Yay for not exploding!

Oh god that was good, have a like and favorite friend

"Is that… offer still open?" she said, as cutely as she could manage.

did not see that coming in the beginning or the middle, but got a feeling near the end before I saw this :rainbowderp:

I like it, have a like :twilightsmile:

7890916

I was expecting that from Rarity, seeing as with Fluttershy that joke's almost a cliche at this point (and rainbow dash has been shipped with everything and the kitchen sink)... But oddly enough the expectation that it wouldn't be Fluttershy because that's too predictable made if funnier to me.

To be fair. She didn't treat their original thought that she was attracted to equines with any sort of seriousness. Unless you know that magic is literally changing your brain when you go through the portal, thinking your friend who, despite being transformed into a human, is actually a horse, would be attracted to horses - makes a whole hell of a lot of sense. Like, 'no fucking duh' level of sense.

Spending most of her life attracted to equines and now a couple years as a human at most, being attracted to humans without magic mind-rewriting involved would seem really weird to anyone thinking about it.

7889369
7890916
7890929
That was, among other things, a reference to my last story. I'd like to think I was responsible for spreading that headcanon around a little more, but I'm probably not.

Rarity didn't occur to me. One of the stories this parodies did that and it felt weird.

I've heard Fluttershy being a zoophile is a fairly common headcanon, but have yet to see it actually used very often. If there's other non-clop stories that explore the concept seriously (like, beyond a single punchline), I'd love to hear about them.

7889468
I actually didn't notice that implication, haha

7889368
Definitely supposed to be awkward. Probably definitely not getting a follow-up. Sorry.

7889772
I submitted into the approval queue instead of the fast lane to avoid any problems. The mods let it through. It's fiiine

Kind of glad, too. It's on the edge, but is not very graphic, so marking it mature would have felt awkward, I think. (I probably would have asked if I could have marked it "mature" without "sex" if it came to that, because otherwise it would look like a clopfic, which it isn't.)

7891088
What I'm thinking is this—even if she is, that wouldn't necessarily make her comfortable with her friends reacting like this. That, more than the actual attraction, is what the story is supposed to be about. And there are some hints that Sunset's thoughts towards horses aren't entirely pure, but the ethical and practical implications of what her friends are suggesting apall her enough she doesn't necessarily want to say that in so many words.

Not sure how clear the story makes that, though.

(Also, I think I could argue that it's ambiguous whether the portal would make ponies turned human attracted to horses or humans, but it could drag on for a bit.)

7892230

I also know it's a comedy piece, it was just a thought that struck me oddly. While she wasn't 100% on having any attraction to horses or not, the points she raised against her friends' assumptions still made a bit more sense on their side of the equation.

"Is that… offer still open?" she said, as cutely as she could manage.

Is it sad that I saw that last line coming? With the way Applejack was acting, I could have sworn she was banging her horses as well. I would love for Sunset to try and explain this to the Twilight in Equestria in the journal. This story definitely deserves a like.:twilightsmile:

Applejack is pimping out her whorse.:ajsmug:

Yeah...her friends are idiots. Even in canon they manage to be absolute fools when clearly they aren't supposed to be. Ah well, I guess that's why Sunset's there. To make up for the stupidity.

Huh. I was expecting her to bring up the fact that horses aren't sentient and sure as hell aren't ponies-an equivalent of sorts would be asking a human if they want to fuck a gorilla.

Still, this was rather funny and I enjoyed it.

Also, all of her friends are idiots.

Good headcanon. Very good. I like this sensible Sunset, and I would like to see more of her attitude toward social relations on the Apples' farm.

7891980

If there's other non-clop stories that explore the concept seriously (like, beyond a single punchline), I'd love to hear about them.

It shows up in the background of the excellent Elements of Opposition (which is M-rated for the unharmonious alternate universe, not for clop. Well, okay, what Fluttercruel does with those feelings, but I still wouldn't call that clop.) I'm afraid that's the only one I know about, though.

one answer to their question could be:

the girls: we thought since you were a pony that you might want to fuck a horse

sunset: Since humans are primates, would you want to fuck a gorilla?

fluttershy: well...

sunset: *facepalm*

mrk

Someone's a furry who takes things way too far. And by someone, I mean all of them.

"Is that… offer still open?" she said, as cutely as she could manage.

Oh my god.

Your body plays a big role in it. When I'm a pony, I like ponies. When I'm human, I like humans. That makes sense?

Actually - no. Cultural standards of beauty are learned. It's not something that ingrained in you by nature. So if Susnset from small age learned to find ponies attractive she not suddenly start to find humans attractive just because she become a human.
And whole "you a pony so you want to screw a horse" are pretty ridiculous. Its like saying that because humans primates they like to screw apes and gorillas.

This is forever the single best answer to the whole 'Sunset and horses' thing. Thank you.

7902727

I say yes and no. I believe that each person has certain features that they're predisposed to prefer - how that's chosen I don't know - but that that is also not the totality of what attracts you.

Like, I'm more inclined towards tall women, which kinda' goes against the common image that women are/should be shorter than men.

Comment posted by Jaro45 deleted January 29th
mrk

7904624
As a long-time furry myself, I know two things:

* Most furries do not wear fursuits
* All furries are weirdos :)

I was referring to the Mane Six all taking things way too far. I was not saying that all furries take things too far.

mrk

7902727 I disagree. Culture (aka nurture) is responsible for SOME of attraction. Genetics is responsible for most of the rest. It is likely closer to a 50/50 split of influence strength. Then there are the people who can simply choose what they are attracted to. No-one told me to be attracted to what I am naturally attracted to, and society actively tried (in vane) to stop me from becoming attracted to anthro features (tails and such).

I didn't like it, I saw the last line coming a mile away, Sunset's outburst was a little overboard, horses aren't ponies just like monkeys aren't humans and other stories have tackled this subject better. Sorry gonna have to give it a dislike.

"STALLIONS HAVE DICKS THE SIZE OF FIRE HOSES AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START SCREWING A MARE! THEY WEIGH LITERAL TONS AND CRUSH PEOPLE TO DEATH OUTSIDE OF SEX CONSTANTLY! IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW SEXY THEY ARE, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT!? I LIKE NOT EXPLODING!"

I sadly only found a german version of this 1000 ways to die episode :>

7900231
Oh boy. That's a bit long for me to casually check out. Mind linking to/reproducing the relevant parts? :(

7893365
To the best of my knowledge, there is absolutely nothing contradicting that :p

7898884
7900292
An earlier draft had this line:

Sunset paused. "Uh, let me just put it this way," she said. "Picture you went to my world and found out that a major form of transportation was riding on the backs of gorillas in skimpy lingerie. How would you feel?"

I scrapped it because I felt people would argue about whether the comparison was valid so much that they would miss the point of the story :p

(Although in retrospect, this was a flawed strategy. People arguing about trivial things = more comments in a given time span = increased chance of getting featured. :p)

And the entire story originally centered around Sunset having trouble accepting that humans riding horses in "lingerie" (saddles) wasn't viewed as sexual at all. (Sort of picture this story in reverse.) I scrapped that when I realized most of the premise centered around Sunset living in the human world for years and somehow never hearing anything about horses.

7892414
This is my logic:

For one, if Sunset's attraction actually was rewritten towards humans, the idea of being attracted to horses would seem like a total non sequitur from her perspective, regardless of how reasonable that would appear to everyone else.

But also, how zoophilia works is ambiguous enough that I felt I had some leeway here. Conventional wisdom is that it's a sexual fetish caused by psychological factors. In this case, it makes sense that Sunset would be attracted to horses—being a pony gives her a psychological reason to be. However, another school of thought says zoophilia is a sexual orientation, like homosexuality, that one can be born with for no reason in particular. In that case, whether it's part of one's conscious mind is ambiguous enough—how the portal would use that when turning a pony into a human is very unclear.

Yes, in Equestria, Sunset Shimmer would be attracted to ponies. But would be portal consider that "attracted to ponies" or "attracted to the same species"? Would the portal choose to give her a condition that is rare in humans just to make her attracted to her old body, even though that could actively hurt her ability to blend into human society? We've seen that the portal arbitrarily gives the ponies clothes when they go through—not giving every single pony turned human one of the most reviled and controversial conditions in human society doesn't seem any more arbitrary. :p

At the very least, it seems ambiguous enough that, in universe, her friends would have trouble deciding what would apply. And the few pieces of evidence they have at their disposal—Sunset going out with Flash (possibly just for power), and Twilight displaying some attraction to Flash (with no ulterior motive)—lean towards the ponies turned human being perfectly comfortable with relationships with humans. The idea that they would unanimously come to the conclusion that Sunset wants to bang horses tests probability enough—them also agreeing to actively encourage that is unusual no matter how you slice it up.

Or, to put it in a different different way—if you were turned into a dog, would you be attracted to dogs or humans? I think one could make a pretty good case for both sides.

7902727
That makes sense to a point. I believe wanting to have sex with large quadrupeds is that point.

I don't believe cultural standards could condition people to desire sex with animals any more than they could condition people to desire gay or straight sex. And I believe the existence of zoophiles today is proof that desire can develop despite overwhelming pressure against it.

…although I realize that is a bit of a controversial position to hold.

7904810
To be honest, I'm surprised so many people found the story interesting without catching on to the alternate interpretation that I intended—that Sunset herself is a zoophile who A) is confused that her friends are defying everything she knows about human culture and B) has enough ethics to be apalled at the suggestion of whoring animals out to her just to be "open-minded."

Without that, I feel the story is a bit predictable as well :p

And as usual, if you could link me to other stories that handle the subject matter better, I would love that. Because until then, I'm going to be confused as to why Fluttershy being a zoophile is considered a cliché when it only actually appears in a dozen or so smut stories. :p

7889369
7897521
If you want to say not banging animals is racist, that's perfectly fine with me, but I don't think many other people are going to be happy with the implications of that

:p

7906933 One, it was a joke. Two, the joke was that the wanted to have sex with a horse because she is from a world of equines.
Not meaning to insult anyone.

7902727

Actually - no. Cultural standards of beauty are learned. It's not something that ingrained in you by nature.

The ever-disturbing "why boner" begs to differ.

Also, I'm pretty sure some of my turn-ons are directly counter-cultural, and ya know, there are non-elderly people who find the elderly really attractive (in a time when almost every current standard of beauty favours youthful features). People may measure and judge themselves and each other by the common beauty standards, but dicks and vaginas have minds of their own.

And implicit in your statement is that culture governs sexual attraction, when in reality LGB folks have had their attractions despite that there was a long time during which those attractions would literally get them killed.

I'm not sure there's any level on which your statement (as a rebuttal to "Your body plays a big role in it") applies to real-world sexual attraction.

7902727 Cultural standards of beauty refer to why some people are into weird jewelry or piercings, not the species of the thing you're attracted to.

7906933 You mean it's not? Dang. I...need to reevaluate some of my life choices...

I saw an opportunity to post the video, and I took it.

"Is that… offer still open?"

:trixieshiftright: Oh my, Flutters...

7909562 Geese were considered exceptionally sexually appealing in ancient Greece. Hence why when Zeus pretended to be one to sleep with a human no one batted an eye.

7907970 That profile pic is so freaking adorable! :rainbowkiss: Where did you get it?

This is kind of funny in a weird way.

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