• Member Since 6th Mar, 2013
  • offline last seen Jul 3rd, 2019




With the invention of the magical radio, ponies from across Equestria await the first public radio broadcast, which will come from Princess Celestia herself. However, one week before the presentation an unauthorized broadcast powerful enough to reach every corner of Equestria appears. Its host? Discord.

Chapters (7)
Comments ( 422 )

I'm going to try something completely different. :derpyderp2:
I really do need ideas about questions and topics though. I need other people's perspectives to make this work.
This is actually going to tie in with the next story I am going to create, which is going to show what is actually going on with the stuff Discord is talking about here, from everypony else's perspective.

Edit: I won't use questions that the actual ponies would never ask, and also won't use questions that are of an M rating in nature.

An interesting idea. You missed a few typos though!

"that you had were"
that you were

"the formally lost books"
the formerly


"Dear Discord
Are our parents lying to us about whether there're monsters under the bed, in the closet or hiding in the toilet?
XoXo Foal Free Press"

5752163 Fixed. And oh boy, I can't even imagine what I'll do with that one. :rainbowlaugh:


Dear Discord,
Are you and Princess Celestia and/or Fluttershy seeing each other in a romantic way?
Shipping Goggles

Too casual for my taste. Also, podcasts in written format defeats the reason I listen to them, which is to be more relaxed while working (surprisingly, you can concentrate on both).

Do you know of Night Vale? It's an fictional radio show, going over events in a strange town completely cut off from civilization. It's the most heard podcast in America last time I checked. I don't follow it, but I've seen the first episode, and it's pretty well put together. Try it out for inspiration on radio stuff.

I'm really enjoying this story so far. I mean I would completely imagine Discord doing this if he found out about the radio.

I'll be definitely tuning in again next week! I just hope he gets some more questions too!
But I still won't I don't trust those apples:ajbemused:

Oh and if you want a question then:
"If you were the ruler of Equestria, what would you do?"

A question

Discord have you ever grown bored of being the Lord of Chaos? What would you do if being chaotic was no longer interesting to you?

This is glorious.

I'm not used to seeing this many comments in such a short span of time. I guess I asked for them, and I certainly did receive. The next chapter will definitely be longer than these first two, and that is exactly what I was hoping for.

5752420 Discord is intentionally supposed to be semi-unprofessional in this. He's operating a radio show for his own amusement and to troll everypony, not to present a serious or relaxing show. It's sort of an embarrassing fact that any pony who tunes their radio just right gets his garbage spewed out at them. But the ponies do it anyway, out of a sort of twisted curiosity, because even though he speaks madness, it is still the voice of an immortal being.

5752419 This reminds me of something. While this question is actually reasonable, as in there would be some ponies who genuinely would ask this, this is about as silly as the questions should get. I won't use questions that the actual ponies would never ask, and also won't use questions that are of an M rating in nature. This particular question is fine and I will actually use it (although you might not get the answer you hope for), it just reminded me that I need to make that clear to everyone.

If you had to be anyone else for a day, who would you choose?

This is amazing. It sounds so much like Discord would.


5752707 Understood. And another question!
Dear Discord,
Where do you come from? Do you have a mommy and daddy Draconequus somewhere?
Delivery Stork

Hey Discord,

I know you don't turn ponies into stone, so what do you turn them into? (Besides opposites of themselves)

Looking for ideas,
Chaotic Ink

Dear Discord:

What is the most chaotic thing you've ever done/want to do?


Unicorn Cracker

I'll be following this. Keep up the good work! :rainbowdetermined2:

Something just occurred to me. There are an awful lot of people expecting me to create believable and amusing answers to all of these questions, pretty much all of which require me to create new head canon. Am I really up to the task?
But then I remembered that pretty much all of his answers are going to be at least partially composed of BS. :twilightsheepish: Although if you can look past it, you might be able to dig out a serious meaning anyway. Probably one that I didn't even realize was there.

5753071 Oh dear, you have written some very highly rated stuff. That honestly makes me all the more afraid that any answer I can come up with won't live up to your expectations. I will think carefully.

Hey, Discord, do you have any idea of how to shut up the ponies who start those random musical numbers? Thanks.

If I may, i would suggest trying to make everytime someone new talks little different how Discord talks (Like maybe bolding or underlining or coloring them).

Its a little hard to read with them all joined up together like this.

Otherwise, good read

5753658 I did wonder about that, but I felt that formatting their speech differently would be a bit obnoxious. Colored text is usually off-putting, italics are reserved emphasis, and bold text would give people the impression that everyone else speaks louder than Discord or something. Underlining a character's entire dialogue would just be awful. What I have done is have Discord announce exactly who he is talking with every time he begins conversing with them as well as only using closing quotes when the speaker changes. If anybody has other ideas for clearly conveying who the speaker is without breaking the immersion, I would like to hear it.

I Have a question for discord! Has he even considered taking on an apprentice? Surely there is somepony who loves Chaos as much as he does, and understands that for true Harmony to exists, a balance of harmony and chaos must always be present.

On another note i love this story and look forward to more! :twilightsmile:

5753819 :rainbowderp: There is no way that you could have known, but...

This is actually going to tie in with the next story I am going to create

That question you posed sets certain things in motion in that future story marvelously. No, Discord will not actually take on an apprentice or teach anyone the ways of chaos, but the question will cause him to take a new perspective on things for that story.
I didn't write the question that brings Discord to where I want him to be, you did.
You win the lottery.
That has to feel weird.

5753859 I look forward to that story then :twilightsmile: As well as updates to this one keep up the splendid work!

Dear Discord,
What is the difference between a duck?
Marbles "Mar" Lost

Dear Discord
would you rather, turn any pony you want into stone, and banish it to the moon using a powerful beam of love ?
Or turn Princess Celestia into a crazy peach-eating duck for a day ?

Diamond dust

dude, you've written Discord great so far. Don't change anything just because a guy (see: lucky shmuck) with other popular stories likes yours.

So far pretty amusing. Look forward to more.

Its host? Discord.

Yes, I have a trade to negotiate with the Princesses.

How about, Celestia invents the radio so Discord sabotages it...

And then Luna invents the gun so we can get rid of that son of a bitch once and for all?

Dear discord.
Is it true that you are good friends with princess Luna?
If so, what do you like to do? Prank celly?

5755606 Its Discord, he either used his power to see outside, or isn't looking outside at all and Is just making it up.

5756583 I am starting the next chapter now, even though I was originally going to wait for a real week to make it. I don't know how long it is going to take since there are a whole bunch of questions to answer, but its worth spending a little extra effort as thanks to everyone for making this explode with popularity (compared to everything else I've written). Thank you all for your input!

Interesting, probably something I'd listen to in the background if it were real, like the Enclave station.

To Discord, Lord of Chaos and probably waffles

So I was walkin' round Baltimare last week and heard the tail-end of the program bout how we had to wait two hours in silence waiting to catch up to whatcha said, then I got an idea, I know it's crazy but if anyone would appreciate a crazy idea I think it'd be you. Music IN BETWEEN the Programs, eh, eh?

Well get back to me on that mate.

- The One and Only Jolly Dodger

P.S. You eva think about merchandisin'?

5757278 Who listens to the Enclave station for much longer than it takes to hear everything it has to offer just once? I do like to listen to it briefly every time I pick up Fallout 3 again, but songs of patriotism just are not something that you want in your ear 24/7 unless you are simply a blind follower patriot. Patriotism is all fine and well, but the music doesn't entertain and it doesn't cause you to think.
I admit that Galaxy News Radio is not much better, especially since many people would argue that the music would only be found entertaining by people from the 50s, but it does give a sense of immersion. The best part about it in my opinion is definitely the fact that it has a talk portion that doesn't just consist of propaganda. I personally think that Three-Dog is a little bit annoying, but at least the things that he says give you an idea that stuff actually happens in the wasteland even when you aren't around, which, in the reality of the game's mechanics, is not true. I definitely think that the talk portion of the radio should have been much more extensive than it was though. Three-Dog comments about the actions of your player, both directly (praising/fearing you for your actions) and indirectly (talking about how life in certain towns or in the wasteland as a whole changes based on your player's actions). But he only makes these comments about stuff associated with the main story, or about only the most expansive of side quests. I wish that he had a lot more stuff to say about the little things, and just generally about ten times more stuff to say in general so that you don't get tired of hearing the same stuff over and over within about two hours.
There are a lot of music radio mods for both Fallout 3 and Fallout New Vegas, but nobody has yet made any talk radio that is extensive and dynamically changing (changes based on the players actions), as far as I know. If anybody did that, I would declare it the best mod ever.

5757416 Yeah, Enclave isn't the best unless you wanna shut the world off while you work on something, hence me saying I would listen to it in the background, it's at that place where you can listen to it and it'll fade into the background staying there until you actively focus on it.


it just reminded me that I need to make that clear to everyone.

Might wanna put it in the author's notes, then. Now for questions:

Dear Discord,

1. What is your spirit animal?

2. Will you marry me?

3. What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen Zebrican swallow?

Sincerely, Fangirl DX

5753980 Yes I did use this question. I almost didn't since it was illogical on purpose and you were probably trying to see if I would ignore it, but I found a way to make it work into a 'Discordism'. With that said, please don't offer any more variations of this question, as the joke only works once. Also, it made my head hurt. :applejackconfused:

5758858 I had already finished this chapter when I read your questions. I will use them for the next chapter.

It just happened. I'd be lying if I said that I didn't see it coming, but I am still baffled.
What is different about this story that made it so successful when I have so few followers at the moment?
It is a random comedy, and something that I did as an experiment. I honestly was not expecting this to happen when I first published it.
It is written in a non-traditional method, with there literally being no words that are outside of quotations (not even so much as a "blah blah blach," said Discord).
It's written in the voice of the most popular villain? That might have something to do with it, but that can't be the complete story.
It is comment driven? I can see why that can lead to more comments, but not why everyone likes it.
I don't have any clue.
But I still have to say thank you everyone, so much! My first feature! I never would have guessed that a story like this would be the one to do it.


have you heard that there are theories going around that a earth pony named "Screwball" is your daughter?
And I ask, are these theories true? I have my doubts but she seems to be able to fly with her propeller cap,
and has what most ponies would call a knack for chaos making.

Also a more silly question,
If you could turn Princess Twilight into a book, what book would it be?

Sincerely Golden Book

5759148 Is the first question a reference to something? This is the first time I have heard the name 'Screwball'.

Gooooooooooooooooooood mmmmorning Equestria! This is not a test this is Discord time to rock it from Dodge Junction all the way to Detrot!

My question to Discord is, what would you do for a Klondike Bar?


5759151 Screwball is the the non-canon daughter of Discord and Fluttershy, she is also sometimes called Topsy Turvy, or his right-handmare in chaos. You can get a better explanation on the MLP Wiki Screwball - Wiki Page.

Dear Discord

Two days some strange beings came around and started asking questions about you. All I remember is that your name and 'grandchildren' were used in the same sentence. Incidentally, my bathtub is made out of solid diamond now. What does this mean?

Questions? Questions, you say?

Is it true that the more orderly pony society gets, the more powerful you become to keep it in check?

Is your show not called Discord Underground Radio Talk because people would think your show was durt-y?

What is the meaning of life? What is the meaning of double-life?

Some questions, eh?

What is your name?
What is your quest?
What does the colour 9 smell like?

Dear Discord

Is Pinkie Pie some sort of baby Draconequus? I keep expecting her to scream "Surprise!" and then explode into a curvier version of you in a tsunami of confetti and glitter.

Dance of the Sugarplum Fairies Parasprites on the Tuba? :rainbowlaugh: I seriously want to hear that. That would rival the Flight of the Bumblebee on the Trombone! (best instrument)
I wonder if I can convince my brother to play it on his tuba...

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