Nothing
Sweetie Belle yawned as she headed for the bathroom, the dreary grogginess of morning still clinging to her.
Another day, another seven hours at school, she thought, Ugh, Mondays… Working out a creak in her neck, she started the next step of her daily routine: combing her teeth and brushing her hair… Or was it the other way around? She didn’t care as long as it worked.
The girl had already eaten breakfast and gotten dressed and every other possible nuance that came with preparing for the usual grind at Canterlot High School, and now she was, as her sister too often put it, “Adding in those last snippets of beauty.” She rolled her eyes just thinking of the words. The last time Sweetie checked, making yourself look civilized was something everyone did on a regular basis.
As usual, Rarity was already in the bathroom applying her snippets with a tube of lipstick. With a muttered greeting, Sweetie squeezed past her sister to get at her toothbrush and, after dragging the toothpaste across the bristles, went to work on her pearly whites. In a minute, she spit the foamy mess out into the sink.
“Ew… Sweetie, do try to lean closer for that. A lady shouldn’t be spitting from two feet above the sink."
“Mmph.”
The toothbrush was already in her mouth again, but her tone was a clear enough answer. As she cleared out her mouth one last time and gave it a rinse, Sweetie dried off her brush, having to step by Rarity again; she caught a glimpse of her sister having swapped her lipstick tube for a handheld mirror and brush. She was used to the sight since she’d seen it every day for years, so she paid it no mind.
Grasping her spray bottle, Sweetie wrapped her pointed finger around the trigger as she brought it into position above her… Huh.
There’s that face looking back, she thought as she stared at her reflection. Her eyes, inevitably, had been drawn to the wall-length mirror since she needed it to comb her hair. Assuming she wanted to have it remotely passable, that is.
Pale skin? Check.
Green eyes? Check.
Pink and purple stripes in curly hair? Check.
Yup, she thought, That’s me. As usual. She had no reason to expect any different, but some part of her always did. Sweetie paused as she stared into the mirror, her hand that grasped the spray bottle lowering to her side. Although she never considered herself to be one of those vain girls who would spend hours admiring themselves, Sweetie knew she would often gaze at her own appearance, whether that be through a mirror or a photo. She didn’t really know why. It was just a feeling that would entrance her.
The girl broke into a frown. No, not this time. No more blank staring. Setting her elbows onto the sink and her head into her hands, she found herself in a glaring contest with her reflection. What’s the deal?
Sweetie started at her eyes, focusing on the sea green orbs peering back at her. It only took a few moments, however, for her to give a small shake of her head. Normal, my eyes are perfectly normal.
She shifted her gaze to her nose. She had her sister’s nose, but that wasn’t a reassurance to her. It was, simply put, small. Never once did it stray into the boundaries of “too wide” or “too pointy” or “too anything.” Nothing.
So she moved to her mouth. Then to her ears. Then to her eyebrows. Then to her hair. Then to her face in its entirety. …Nothing.
Sweetie let out a sigh. Ugh, what am I even looking for? Some magical zit to tell me what’s wrong?
“Are you alright, Sweetie?”
Turning toward her sister, the girl saw that Rarity had halted all progress in the makeup department to peer at her, a flash of concern in her eyes. Somewhat reminiscent of a circus, only one of her eyes had any makeup applied.
“Is something bothering you?”
“…Nothing.”
Flicking her head back toward the mirror, the girl resumed her staring even though she knew there was nothing to be found in it. Normal… Everything’s normal… A thoughtful look crossed her features. Maybe that’s the problem.
Taking a look at the spray bottle still clutched in her hand, she brought it over head and began pushing back on the lever. Once her hair was sufficiently wet, Sweetie grabbed at her brush. Muscle memory nearly brought her into her usual routine, but she stopped herself just short of coming into contact. Instead, she took a moment to think. Just what did she want to do?
Her mind flipped through all the hairstyles she’d seen all her classmates wear. With a shrug, she picked one out at random.
Within moments, her brush was traveling through her hair, straightening and flattening, curling and twirling. She couldn’t help but grin as she watched her hand work to bring the mental image to realty. With each stroke of the brush, her smile widened.
“Sweetie, what are you doing?”
“Doing my hair.”
“I can see that much. I’m asking just what you are doing with it.”
“I’m trying out a new style.”
“Okay… and you’re going to go to school with it like that?”
“Yes.”
Sweetie felt a sudden resistance on her comb, stopping it dead in its tracks. A quick glance at the mirror told her that Rarity was the cause. The girl frowned, already able to hear what her sister was going to say.
“Sweetie, dear? I’m one for experimenting with new styles, but I’m afraid I can’t let you go out looking like… this.”
“What’s wrong with it?”
“For starters, that’s a boy’s style.”
Eyes drifting toward the mirror again, Sweetie’s brow furrowed as she took in the sight. Although her hair was naturally curly, she’d done her best to straighten it out in an attempt to make her bangs appear longer and to fall down her face. Her hair had been parted, one side lengthier than the other, and was swept to the side as well as having been spiked up in a few choice spots. If it weren’t for the mass of hair flowing freely off the back of her head, it would’ve been the quintessential “boy” haircut. After staring for a few more seconds, Sweetie shrugged.
“I like it. Scootaloo has a boy’s style after all.”
“I can’t speak for Scootaloo’s parents. As far as you and I know, they’d let her run around in a parka during summer. I, however, do care for your appearance.”
“You’re telling me I have to change it back, aren’t you?”
“Well, if you put it like that…”
“Rarity, it looks fine. I’m keeping it like this.”
“No, Sweetie, you’re not. It looks like it had a run in with a bird’s nest.”
“It’s my hair!”
“Sweetie. As your sister, the answer is no. If this means so much to you, we can discuss it after school. Until then, please adopt a more… appropriate hairstyle for a girl of your class.”
“…Fine.”
Not bothering to mask her irritation, she set to work in undoing her creation. Her hand leading the brush through a far-too-familiar set of motions, she was done within a minute.
She stood back in morbid admiration of her usual hair style, curled in the front and straightened wherever else. For a moment, she stood entranced by her reflection, but she shook herself out of her stupor.
Stomping out of the bathroom, she heaved an annoyed sigh.
That’s not my face, she thought, I would’ve recognized it if it were.
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If I looked like Sweetie Belle, then so would I.
Interesting, I like it. Like and Fav.
Fairly sure the second one should be hair for the phrasing to work
Ennyhoo, after reading, I'm more confused than sated. Sweetie wants a change, which Rarity disagrees with... Oh, nevermind, I got it. It took me writing it down to understand the dilemma.
Not quite sure what the point of that was, but an interesting ride.
short, nice and could be made into a bigger thing
I like it 100% sure fav
Hnngh, my trans feels.
This is lovely.
Hm. This was rather deep for such a short piece. I've been reading a bunch of sorta fluffy, happy-go-lucky stories, and I really appreciate something like this. Keep up the good work
Really liked the emotions in this, even though it was short. Plus, already hit popular stories list, I see good things for this.
Thinking of doing any more little insights like this? You're really good at them
...Well fuck you Rarity.
The beginning of realizing issues with gender identity? Sweetie Belle's confusion works (sure, some people look at themselves and just know "I'm not supposed to be [gender]", but a lot only come to the answer after a lot of difficulty. Can't say I much like Rarity here, but without actually seeing the conversation I don't want to prematurely judge (at least Rarity acknowledged that it might actually be important to Sweetie Belle, which is something).
It's not often I want to see more of a fic, but I definitely want to see more of this.
Should you write more is the real question, but I'm happy either way. Excellent job sir / madam.
Good job! This is generally how trans people first realize there is something wrong. I remember I figured it out in 5th grade. Then promptly buried for like 19 years so my parents wouldn't murder me with a shovel. Fortunately... I'm pretty sure that pony society is accepting of trans ponies and probably just has a spell to bamph somepony into whatever gender. After all... there is a freaking polymorph Breezies (communal) spell in existence.
Yes I know this is an Equestria Girls fic, but the magic portal is a freaking statue in front of the school and is now perma opened. I'm pretty sure it's just a revolving door for tourists now...
Missing a set of end quotation marks. To keep you on your toes, I won't say where.
Rather lovely. Sadly familiar.
5658696 I don't get where people are getting the gender thing from either. What I got from it is that Rarity is kinda living her life through Sweetie, and as such, Sweetie must comply to her sister's 'requests'
Either Sweetie has gender identity problems, or the mirror is a 'portal'to an R63 universe that influences her world, and vice versa.
I'm going for the former.
Sequel please
PLOT TWIST! Sweetie doesn't recognize her face because it's a changling looking back at her.
I rather enjoyed this. Short, sweet, and to the point. I like that. You got yourself another thumbs up!
I can't say I know those feelings, but good on all of you that do.
I can say though that this was a good short story.
5658696
5658898
I feel like the author actually left it like that so people could take it how they wanted. Rarity just being controlling, forcing Sweetie to be ladylike when she doesn't want to be. Sweetie just feeling like switching her look up for once. Or Sweetie struggling with gender identity and all that. But since it's in the LGBT group, I'd assume it's the last one.
5659955
Not the author, actually.
5659989 5659955 It was actually placed there with my permission.
5660035 As Accursed said, I left it open for interpretation.
Yes, yes it is.
5660094 Oh no, I'm actually serious. It's not a coincidence that so many people saw it as a gender issue story.
5660134 No worries! Just misunderstood what you were saying.
"I should look more like a horse."
Yeah, I know.
5660067
Yay I was right!
Okay I read this. And I admit that the meaning behind it went completely over my head. I thought that it was going to be something else entirely other than gender identity disorder; something out of creepypasta works.
Still, it's an interesting idea. And it's a nice change to see a girl identifying as a boy rather than the other way around.
Huh. Subtle, but well done. And perhaps the worst possible sister for this sort of epiphany. I quite liked it.
Soooo.... Is this just going to stay a one shot?
5663536 Unless I get more inspiration, yes.
5664265
Here you go, just what you need!
4.bp.blogspot.com/-pQ-72wPHKJk/U1vmJBg9bzI/AAAAAAAAMTQ/jH-XFTtSPlk/s1600/Capture.PNG
5664306 I walked right into that...
5664323
Well a good book is the best thing for clearing out writer's block.
Now, I'd primarily say this is a gender identity story, but there could be a hint of species dysphoria in here? I'm only throwing that in there because it reminds me of what I experienced when I realised that I didn't identify as human, but hey-ho!
Well I thought this was a Sweetie Bot story and she was questioning whether or not she was real, as such I think you did a pretty poor job of getting the message across so I'm giving this a dislike.
5666480 Um, it's not a sweetie bot story. Not at all.
5666817
I know. What I meant is that a lot of people didn't 'get' the story; some thought that Sweetie was just trying to change her hair style, others thought that she was questioning her gender, still others thought she was rebelling against her sister's influence, while I thought she was questioning her life and existence (Which made me think it was Sweetie Bot wondering if she's alive or not.)
My point being that the message of the story is not clear.
5666901 Oh, I see what you mean. That vagueness was completely intentional. When I was writing it, I worded it so people could relate to it differently and have their own interpretations. Sometimes a message is best left for the reader to take for themselves.
Nice, though to be honest, Sweetie Belle wasn't the best choice for this role. It's pretty obvious she's satisfied with being a mare/girl. Apple Bloom could've worked better, though in my humble opinion Scootaloo is definitely more likely than the both of them.
5666954 What made you decide to do that? ...Although to be fair I wasn't confused.
5678900 It's just a literary thing to do. There's a few reasons like allowing the reader to relate in their own way or giving the story a new range of meanings. Vague messages are actually quite common in literature.
I'm not usually one for sequel-begging, but... Okay, I'm totally sequel-begging.
I don't want some ginormous epic with a hollywood happy ending where everything's swell (which isn't to say that would be bad either), I just want exploration.
Maybe something from Rarity's perspective, showing her confusion at Sweetie's "strange behavior". Maybe something about Sweetie going through his day, and confiding in his friends.
5681910 A few people have asked about a sequel. I'm not against a sequel, in fact I would like to write one. The problem is that I have no ideas for where to go from here. I could do something like you suggested, but it just wouldn't sit right with me.
Yup, that was obvious. Mutual ignorance is painful.
Already sunken
into the world so distant and dear,
unable to see the path,
unable to know.
Within the darkness you cannot help but stay,
for still you search for an answer;
fearing there might be none.
Excellent work, dear Author!
A sequel would be appreciated yeah. Maybe you could read some other fiction for inspiration? I'd suggest Sweetie learning about someone with a similar situation kickstarting further questioning. It doesn't have to be another transperson.
5667573 I personally liked Sweetie Belle as the choice, mostly because I view her as the 'girly'-est of the crusaders, so for me gender identity issues in her would make for the most interesting story. For me, Scootaloo having gender identity issues would provide too little angst. Since she's already so tomboy-ish, would it matter as much if she did have these issues, or would they just get easily resolved because her personality is so much farther along in that direction already?
But that's just me.
5679845 the other thing is this seems to be early in Sweetie's journey so she might not be thinking of herself as transgender(if she is, like the author said it is vague), her reaction is all about how what she sees in the mirror isn't her. (Using female pronouns because Sweetie hasn't indifyed as male yet.)
That was a really interesting story! I know i can relate since my sister is much like Rarity, always wanting me to look way too stylish and not letting me do my thing when it comes to style!
Late to the party, but glad to see in the comments that the story was what I thought it was about. I actually found the story pretty depressing (especially since it stops here), what with Rarity's forcing Sweetie to conform.
Great work!
I really liked this! Although it saddened me to see that Rarity was going to be that person in this fic, I loved it. I also think a sequel would be awesome if you ever chose to write one (wow, the comments are becoming a broken record-).
The status says complete...yet why does this fic not FEEL complete?