• Member Since 29th Sep, 2011
  • offline last seen Nov 7th, 2018

Ponydora Prancypants

okay now kiss!


Pinkie Pie isn't the only pony in town with a sweet tooth. Rarity had forgotten that today was the day the snack carts rolled into Ponyville, bringing them: the delicious phenomnomenons. But these decadent treats may turn out to be unhealthy in more ways than one. Can Rarity resist the temptation?

Sincere thanks to the masterful and genteel Harwick for providing the cover artwork.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 65 )

This fic actually took place in ancient Japan.

5650289 The best setting of them all.

Did you find a new interesting way to defeat it? Possibly attacking its weakpoint?


I like silly Ponydora. I like all Ponydoras, I guess.

And here I thought we wouldn't get a crab in on it.

Also, am I the only one in the world that thinks that Nutella is one of the most revolting substances known to mankind?

I just can't get into the Rarijack stuff you do. Sorry Ponydora. But this, well, this is a pleasant surprise.

And it is glorious.

This is the second time I've ever seen the word "tintinnabulation" used in a sentence, and I'm pretty sure the other one was also you.

I do feel a little silly for thinking, "What an odd title," then glossing right past it, then being surprised at the ending.

Yes. You are completely and utterly alone. But I'm not really one for muffins, which in this fandom is arguably even stranger.

5650449 I stand by ye, the thing is going to lead people into an early grave. I cringe when I see people eat it straight out of the jar. :P

Author Interviewer

oh god not the snack carts

I hated that comic, I have to read this now.

the delicious phenomnomenons

Phenomnomenons. Dammit, man, now I can't stop saying this word over and over.

As others have pointed out, the Angel/Devil subversion was excellent.

And those phenomnomenon vendors always did seem suspicious...

I sent her a letter inviting her to watch the raid. Who's handling her mail?"

You wanna contact Princess Twi, you get to her through her assistant or her mentor. Every postal service pony who's delivered to her has had a door slammed in their face.

I loved it, but I fear the sequel in which Dash helps tend to that bear's issues...

Welp, there's the crab we've all been waiting for,

You know, technically, they weren't doing anything wrong. I mean, when the deception was revealed, the desserts were still there. I mean, they were selling a genuine product...



Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash as shoulder pegasi? Excellent.

And that ending? Hah! The title convinced me that whatever would happen, it wouldn't be that. How wrong I was!


An excellent one-off. Have your 50th like from me.

The best. :raritystarry: Poor Rarity, it's SO HARD to resist the siren song of snack cakes. I laughed harder than I probably should have at the paleo diet reference and the pseudo-shoulder pegasi. I hope Rares came through the epic battle alright - to lose the phenomnomenons AND get goo in her mane would just be the worst POSSIBLE thing! :raritydespair:

FiM Fiction says the chapter is 2,000 words long. :trixieshiftleft:
FiM Fiction also says the story is 1,684 words long. :trixieshiftright:

Go to bed FiM Fiction, you’re drunk.

By the way, the spelling is phenomnomenoms - three noms in the word. There is no non in there.


Nope! I just re-checked the comic.


Yep. And these events really happened!


Thank you! And may I just say that the pterrorgrine falcon is my favorite bird.


No offense taken at all. I had a lot of fun with this and I'm glad you enjoyed it!


Well, it's quite possible that not only did Twi get the letter, she actually put Pinkie Pie in the right place at the right time to make the raid work. Princesses work in mysterious ways, after all. Nice to see you here, by the way!


I seriously considered establishing that the changelings were spies, or that there was some legitimate reason to arrest them aside from just being changeling bakers. Then I decided it was funnier to go with the fridge horror of there being no good reason for this duo being cornered and then (I suppose) horribly done away with.


I'm so glad you liked it. It's always nice to get a comment from you!


I'm pretty sure you commented on the last time, too. Glad you enjoyed, and nice to see you around!

*rechecks comic*
*sees nons*
*looks at preview file from before the comic released*
*sees noms*
Huh. Looks like they switched it up before they released the final version. How about that?

They have been arrested on Celestia's orders.

She wants to do their interrogation, personally.

"Sister, are you finished interrogating those bugs ye-..."

The dungeon had undergone a transformation. Gone was the drab slate stonework and iron bars, the chains dangling from the walls. No more was there a feeling of hopeless despair. Instead an oven burned cheerily away in a corner, in contrast to the disturbing green goo filled pod in the rooms center. one of the changelings was checking the desserts inside the oven, as the other was decorating a fresh batch.

Celestia stood at the counter, he mouth openly salivating at the sight of the delicious treats. Her eyes, however, were wide in surprise and alarm. Luna gazed at the scene, her face set in a bemused frown.

"And you didn't even invite me, Celestia?"

Yep, this is obviously how it happened.

And yeah, I went 'oh ho, I see what you did there' at the title and was subsequently caught off guard by the reveal. :facehoof:

The phenomnomenons vendors as changelings? Makes sense.

... You clever sonova bitch. I was expecting the pastries to turn into the giant crab. :rainbowlaugh:
Ah well, it was hilarious none the less.

Enough that I'm willing to give you a glowing green upward pointing thumb.

I am laughing so hard right now.

You absolutely KILLED with this. This is a glorious masterpiece.

Of course it was terribly messy; Rarity hit the poor crab's weak point for massive damage.

I wrote a review of this story. It can be found here.

Muffins and Nutella? Is nothing sacred?

Most entertaining, though it took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that the last word in the title was "Carb." I'm just so used to the other one. In any case, thank you for this.


This is definitely how it happened.

And it came to pass in those days, as it had come before and would come again, that the crabs rose vast from the sea and sowed panic within the ponies, and the apple trees were felled, and disharmony reigned. And ponies cried out to Celestia, saying, O She of the Dawn, Bringer of the Day, let the Chosen Mare rise up near the Everfree, according to the prophecies, as she was in ages past and will be in ages to come. Let the Princess of Sapphires bring beauty to the land that our fields will bear fruit and our magic shine forth. Let the majesty of the Lady of Gemstones shield us from their rampage, and her grand horn of glory defend us. Let Rarity gallop forth on the plains of Equestria.

Holy Christ Almjghty.

I just realized the title is not Giant Enemy Crab.

So many comments make sense now.:rainbowderp:

The giant crab falls over. Rarity receives +540 EXP, but takes 1d10 SAN damage. :rainbowwild:

She can never escape her crustacean foes. Not ever.

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