It's hard saying goodbye to your home of many years.
Now with a Spanish translation by Spaniard Kiwi!
Chapters (1)
Skywriter
Joined 17th Jan, 2012 ·
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So... many... Golden Oaks stories...
4394390
Mmmaybe you should actually read it.
4394398 Man I like your profile pic.
Damn, I bought that hook, line, and sinker, and got a swift yet delightful left hook for my gullibility.,, and yet I remain wistful. Fancy that.
Well done, sir.
4394409
Why thank you! Here it is all big.
I have to say, this particular take of the subject I hadn't seen yet, nor expected. Well done, well done indeed.
Spoiler-texting this comment, just so people don't come looking at it before reading the story this early in its run:
Well, that was unexpected. I liked the twist at the end, and it made the lack of action and specificity earlier in the piece a lot more logical. There are some nice bits of description in here, as usual. Unfortunately, I really found myself wanting something different about halfway through—and depending on how much time I have today, I may try to go write it myself. The lack of activity and visible emotion here really nerfs the story's effect for me, and while I enjoy the prose and I think the piece is well put together from a character perspective, I just can't find it especially engaging. What I found I wanted, amid all the descriptions, was more of an extended meditation on disaster. Losing your home is something that happens to a lot of people for a lot of reasons, and I don't know if I've seen anyone really tap into that yet, even though it feels like low-hanging fruit the more I think about it. In any case...
It's a good piece, with (as I said) some nice prose work and some good evocative description. I'm happy to upvote it.
You forgot something: #MournEverything. I understand your feelings of loss, but I'm still willing to give the Rainbow Friendship Crystal Caravan a chance next season. Just needs to be introduced for legit story reasons. #InMerchWeTrust
mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw1705_small.jpg
But it was fun!
You clever bastard.
Ooh, that was good
You sneaky, sneaky thing.
Puts a new spin on it, eh, Twily? 
One of those stories you read and then immediately reread.
Oh, that was clever.
That was particularly clever.
Clever.
Oh, you sneaky bastard. I was all ready to start a rant about how this was the 8th damn tree story I have read, but it isn't.
Well done.
And there I was thinking that Twilight's inner voice was off.... I just love a story that I have to read twice!
I started suspecting it wasn't Twilight on the "clothes on my back" line but still it was a great payoff.
I'm on the camp that thinks Trixie did nothing wrong on her first appearance and the mane 3/6 were acting like heckler hicks, so having your house destroyed because you stumbled into a town where a apparently no one knows what a performance is actually seems sadder to mr than having the library blown up. At least Twilight got a weird looking castle out of it.
Ah see what ya did there.
Beautifully done, though really I expect nothing else from you.
I thought the voice was a bit off in the beginning but then you pulled out the twist - bravo.
Okay that is a good plot twist. you i like.
That was cute... I was a bit concerned the character's voice in the early part wasn't really jiving well with the header implied picture. A well played twist.
Nicely done! I thought to myself "Twilight is surprisingly full of herself" once or twice while reading it, but it's not like she hadn't had reason to be. By the end it fit perfectly, of course.
Yeah, I was like "this is a little off" but, you know, kept reading and should have known better than to think that. I totes got trolled.
Well played good sir.
I was going to say that Twilight had only been in Golden Oaks for a year and the span of season four, but...
Jeez, Skywriter. Nice, clever story.
Goddamn it, you magnificent bastard.
I want to see Trixie outside the Crystal Castle of Friendship screaming:
Trixie: Where's my castle, Sparkle? I'm going to sue you to the highest court in the land!
Twilight: You mean Princess Celestia, my former teacher?
Trixie: Right! (pause) Do you mind if I bed down in the old library tonight? There may be some cover, and there's a storm scheduled...
14/10, crie evrytiem.
Truly though, a clever twist. I did begin to smell the fuse when specifics and concrete terms kept being avoided, leaving everything in the realm of hasty judgement. Still, I did not expect Trixie, of all ponies, to show up. So kudos for keeping the reader in the dark even if they start to grow suspicious.
Now, about that Cadance...
Excellently done!
You, my good sir, win.
I thought something was up when she said "clothes on her back" and I went "Twilight doesn't normally wear clothes..."
4395023
You magnificent bastard. Well done.
At first I was like:
Then I was like:
And finally I was like:
While the author was like:
That was clever.
Oh, Mr. J.:
You're always such a kidder!
Mike
Well played, good sir. Well played.
Oh, well done, sir. You played my expectations like a master - bravo.
Aww. The poor caravan.
#feelsbadman
...
I'm, simply not in the right state of mind to give you a proper response right now. Dashie, cover for me.
Thank you.
One thing I don't get, though. No character tag? I know it's important to the story, but dude, how did the mods let you get away with that?
4395734
Dunno! I guess it's not mandatory?
4395782
I don't think character tags are mandatory; I've seen other stories without them.
Your blog post and John Perry made me wary, keeping an eye out for vague pronoun references and carefully crafted ambiguities. But it was the line "I don't exactly know how the public works division operates in this town" that threw a warning flag. "Twilight's probably reorganized the entire Ponyville bureaucracy by now," I thought to myself. "This can't be her. But then who? It would have to be someone new to Ponyville, who managed to lose her home just after arriving.
"Oh."
Part of me regrets that I wasn't able to appreciate the reveal when you intended it. Part of me is proud of itself for needing so few hints. All aspects, however, are grateful for a beautifully written meditation on the nature of possessions and sentimental value. Thank you for it.
As many others have said, well played, Skywriter, well played.
mlpforums.com/uploads/post_images/img-2548447-1-FANMADE_Luna_I_see_what_you_did_there.jpg
Well played Skywriter, once again very well played.
I can see I'm going to have to get in line in order to offer "well played" #22.
You got me. You nailed me, sir. Halfway through I was seeing the references to "One season ends, one season begins" and I was rereading through it and picking up what looked like other meta-references and expecting a Hoardsmiths swerve. Then you took it in an entirely different direction, you magnificent bastard.
Ok, another story about..... wait... WHAT!?!?!?!
Oh, well played.
Wow what a
.I actually thought it was Twilight.
*slow clap* nicely done