This story is a sequel to Mail Order Orphan
The epic saga of Brown Note the unicorn, cursed with the most horrible talent ever. Will he ever find respite? Read to find out!
Chapters (2)
- Member Since 26th Feb, 2014
- offline last seen January 5th
kudzuhaiku
She's looking at you. Yes you. And she is judging you with her eyes. There is no escape.
kudzuhaiku
Joined 26th Feb, 2014 ·
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Laugh riot!
What the hell did I just read?
Huzzah! I don't understand.
If you call this a parody of bad writing, then it's really funny!
An obvious troll fic... that turns out to be a bedtime story told by Equestria's greatest troll. Hilarious. :-)
I wish I understood all the dislikes. I wish folk would leave a reason why when they do. Kinda frustrating.
Well this certainly made my monday a hell of a lot better. I haven't laughed so hard at potty humor in ages.
4127958
Thanks. That makes me feel better. Was a rough day in school.
I just wanted to make folk laugh.
wut.
4127705 Some people can't understand what a troll fic is.
4129124
This isn't a troll fic. **Looks innocent**
It is a bedtime story. For Ivy. Cute sweet little Ivy.
oh my
4129358
I have a horrible image of Sweetie Belle drowning in the mess that Brown Note left behind. Looking just like she does in the picture as she sinks into the brown sea.
What the ffffffu-?!
4129138
Told by her dad. Who is a troll. :-) (OK, technically he is a draconequus, but then most internet trolls are technically human... :-))
You can thus see the confusion. :-)
Can't help but think that even without his powers, Discord = Best Troll Dad ever.
4130701 0.0 Good God...
4127705
I can't really speak for other people but if I had to guess then I'd say that the dislikes probably come from two sources: potty humor and meta jokes. An important thing to keep in mind when writing comedy is that not everyone is going to find your jokes funny.
Potty humor is, of course, the main point of this story, but if people aren't laughing at it then they're probably going to grossed out instead. As much as people claim to enjoy 'feels,' if you manage to disgust your audience then they're not going to like it.
Meta humor is also a fairly touchy subject. When people read stories, they like to get immersed in the scenes you're painting. Whenever you mention a meta element you're pulling the reader out of that. That's fine if it's funny. Humor is also entertainment. But if they don't find it funny, then all you've accomplished is to remind the reader that they're reading a story which they're not particularly enjoying at the moment.
There are some ways around that. In this story, specifically, if you'd mentioned that Discord was dictating the story at the start then every mention of the word 'narrator' in the narration would bring to mind Discord and whatever nursery scene you described and not hurt the immersion at all. As it stands now, though, 'narrator' comes across as more of an 'author-playing-god' scenario which isn't nearly as interesting.
One last thing I should mention is that you shouldn't feel like you've made a bad story just because it got downvotes. If fact, having a lot of upvotes and downvotes is more of a sign of extreme content than anything wrong with the story itself. For people who like potty humor and such, seeing a lot of downvotes on the stories they like can be just as annoying for them as it is for the people who wrote them.
4134932
If I had mentioned that discord was narrating, it would have spoiled the surprise.
Sigh. It probably was a bad idea to release this. I wanted a delightful but somewhat horrible surprise that ended as a sweet story.
What I got was a visit by Brown Note himself.
wut
Okay I know it is about poo... So it is not funny..... Oh I give up BWAHAHAHAHAHA
This is awsome!
He has such a terrible power. He needs to learn control.
Discord is the best father ever.
Another gut busting story, this time about bursting guts.
Your writing continues to have me crack up. Have a cookie.
Ummm.. wut
I realised I should read this as soon as I saw the unicorn's name.
I don't even like shit jokes!
This was great...
Okay. This was hilarious.
I have a terrible, wonderful feeling that Bucky should very much like to meet Brown Note.
The world would never be the same.
Hwhehehehe. Still love Uvy's universe.
Princess Potty Mouth best waifu
Discord's bedtime stories for Ivy are far too entertaining. I'd love to see more someday.