• Member Since 10th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen Jul 5th, 2020


I'm your friendly neighborhood Sir Dies-A-Lot, and I have a habit of resurrecting more often than Jesus! If you came for quality content, then you'd best high-tail it outta here! ...Because I suck.


A historic day for Equestrian civilization, the fine ponyfolk of Ponyville make first contact with alien life. Unfortunately for them, it's not a friendly encounter, as they're greeted by the world's most notorious supervillain.

And Fluttershy has been tasked as his keeper.

Meanwhile, a dazed and agitated Doctor Evil must learn to cope with his new surroundings, and embrace the lessons about friendship that the ponies can teach him.

...Pffft, fat frickin' chance.

Inspired by another crossover that I've written, but have deleted on the grounds that I hate the shoddiness of my own work.

Chapters (11)
Comments ( 203 )

I'll be disappointed if Fat Bastard doesn't make an appearance.

I saved a copy of the old one! And there's a decent chance that the Wayback Machine did too! You can't ever get rid of it! Muahahahahaha~

And the best part?

Austin powers can't possibly stop me.


*mini cooper with rocket engines lands.


We hold Equestria ransom for...

*dramatic zoom*

One hundred billion dollars!

... What's that? They don't have any fricken' dollars?! Are you fricken' shitting me?!

Ok, I'll admit. So far it's better than I thought it was gonna be.

4029778 I'll be even more disappointed if Mini-me doesn't shows up!

I just have one question, Where is Mr. Bigglesworth?

I can't wait to see the reaction when he finds out about magic. "So you mean to frickin' tell me you can shoot "lasers" out of your horn?!

Horses with freaking laser beams attached to their heads!

Doctor evil ... in equestria ? ...

*tears up* its so beautiful man ...

Gimme a hug !

I can think of no better representative then Doctor Evil.



... I am laughing so hard... because considering Twilight Sparkle can be a living gatling gun via Pinkie Pie... that is very possible.

Austin powers and FIM.





Why didn't I think of that? :derpyderp2:

I was really expecting a Johnson joke, but I'm interested.

Oh, lord...

I had a busy schedule, dammit! Now I can't stop laughing!

Way to go, asshole!

*Sits on lawn chair with a box of infinity popcorn and a bottle of eternal pepsi* I am intrigued, continue. *Munches on some popcorn and then takes a sip of pepsi*

4030934 believe me, I haven't forgotten about our beloved shorn feline.

Literally the first thing out of my mouth when I saw this story:

"Oh, for fuck's sake!"

.......it's.....so....beautiful...have all my moneys

i demand Mini-me joining the good (evil) doctor :rainbowkiss:
also a pony version of fat bastard :pinkiecrazy:

I read One Million Bits, and loved it, and I love this.
We still need a fat bastard pony, though.


Oh, you bronies and your love of fat bastards!

Yes! Dr. Evil! He's one of the reasons why Austin Powers is so hilarious.

4033867 I don't know if a fat bastard pony would work; I mean, Fat Bastard in the films worked because of human funny stuffs and reasons, but I actually shudder to think what a pony version of him would be, or even a version of him as a different species

But now I don't doubt someone will try to art a version of him as an equestrian citizen........if that happens, ill most likely throw up; I still cant forget that 2nd movie's bed scene.......all that fried food, eww

OH SWEET CELESTIA *double facepalm* :rainbowlaugh: just this title picture alone AND the description made me laugh :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::trollestia::rainbowlaugh:

Heres five mustaches for you :moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:

I must pull my tanker truck of soda around to My chair and wait... Yes yes


...this has to be one of the greatest things ever...

4036366 OI you!


Scootaloo! its whats for dinner, Scootaloo! the other other white meat!
you feel like Scootaloo tonight?

Scootaloo! its finger lickin good!


A dragon Fat Bastard, then. Think about it: a gigantic dragon laying covered in half eaten gems. Rarity lying beside him. She distracts him and shoves a tracking device up his bum, at which point he lascivously rolls onto her, mistaking her act of espionage for something quite different.

:moustache: "Well, how could you do it?"
:raritydespair: "I was just doing my job."
:moustache: "No, I mean how could you do it? The dragon's so fat, the sheer mechanics of it are mind-boggling.

4038709 4036366 A dragon Fat Bastard would be awesome.
"First things first: where's your shitter? I've got a turtle head poking out! "
"I'm not kidding. I've got a crap on deck that could choke a donkey! Oooh, IT'S SQUIDGY!"

When I read the tittle I though it was gonna be a Dota 2 cross-over with witch doctor Doctor xD!



So its unpleasantly damp nice to know.:pinkiesick:

Sir, I'm gonna have to ask you for your license, registration, and a big, fat helping of MOAR!

4043159 One order of MOAR -hold the onions- comin' right up!

We have both a funny crossover, AND a first contact fic!

Way to kill two breezies with one stone!

I've always dreamed about this!

I saw this as I was loading a new page then immediately pressed the back button, proceeding to click the highlighted title of this story.
I expect greatness.

4043391 For some reason, the Head Breezy reminded me of a Scandinavian Judge Judy.

.....frickin sharks with frickin lazer beams.

Here's hoping we see more.

In honor of this new idea being tested, I present you with these:

Lol. Poor Mr. Bigglesworth, having to put up with Doctor Evil. XD

I eagerly await more.

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