• Member Since 10th Jul, 2013
  • offline last seen 4 hours ago

Wave Blaster


I like writing. It's the thing that drives me. My goal is to reach others through my work and have a nice talk.

E
Source

Discord is free (somehow) but this time he returned peacefully to his stone imprisonment after 16 hours, but why? and what has he done that he considers it as his last Magnum Opus?
When the Mane Six return to Ponyville they find it being attached by a group of three monster-mares, or are these new creatures something more.

New readers can start with the chapter Doom Patrol #1.

Transformed by Discord the trio know as the Cutie Mark Crusaders were turned into three monster mares, now using their new found powers to help ponies as Equestria's strangest heroes. By their own the're Appleling, Sweetie Bot and Energyloo but together they are... The Doom Patrol.

First chapter finally edited by VunderGuy.
Second chapter mercifully edited by Frazone.
Chapters six and seven edited by Diamond Dust.

Disclaimer: as you can see, there is already two other fics about the Doom Patrol in this page, both based on Grant Morrison's AWESOME run on the series. But I decided to make a different idea, using as a guide the Blessed whit suck/Cursed with awesome principle.

Chapters (10)
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Comments ( 96 )

Applejack: What the heck?
Rainbow Dash: Yeah, what in Equestria just happened?
Twilight: I don't known, Princess?
Celestia: Your guess is as good as mine, my faithful student.

Okay, it's official, you're trolling the mods. Switching to the script layout midway through for no reason even though that format is banned? You're trolling. And you're laughing about it. Admit it.

2868455

Yes, because I'm evil. Mwa ha ha:pinkiecrazy:

Now seriously, the first comment in my first fic, and all I got is a Duchy McNitpcik commenting for a four-line mistake? That was disappointing:rainbowhuh:
I mean, i though that the important thing was about the history, the characters, the narrative, the fact that I barely speak English and the eventual grammatical errors. But no, apparently the most important thing is a four-lines mistake about a rule I missed, wow.:derpyderp2:
Very well then, if you can give me a better review, I will change that. Deal?

Comment posted by Jlargent deleted Jul 15th, 2013

Pinkie annoyed enough to give her the Batcave designs.

2877530

Trust me, there is a very good explanation of why Pinkie/Pinkamena's hideout is a cave, and why it's full of DCU references.

"Because I thrust you..."
Should be "trust"
But much funnier this way.

"Everypony wet to sleep" my kids have this problem sometimes. Should be "went".

2882888
:rainbowlaugh:
Ok ok, i will fix that. As you can see my english is far from flawless, so thanks for pointing that.:twilightblush:

2871630
Deal. Sorry to come off as so rude, and sorry I took so long in responding (stupid notifications never told me). I actually did upvote this fic because I really liked the premise, I just saw a completely out of nowhere change in writing style, and, well, my nitpicker side kicked in. I didn't mean to offend, and I do see a lot of improvement in the second chapter. Plus, Pinkamena with Doctor Insano's glasses is just hilarious. I'll try to be more constructive when giving a comment, and again, sorry for... ruining that first comment for you. I'm looking forward to what's ahead.:pinkiesmile:

2901450
Don't worry, it's cool:pinkiehappy:
I changed to script layout because i couldn't find actions to came with the dialog so I kinda blacked out and just put it in that way.:twilightblush:

I'm glad that you liked the premise, at first i was a little afraid that every CMC fan would want my blood for this, but now I see that things came up better than expected.
And also, if you upvoted this, then you have my full permission to point out every mistake that bugs you since your vote help this story. So keep on with the comments and i will keep with the story.:yay:

P.S. By the way, would you like to point out what do you expect to happen in the story? I have some short of a writer's block right now and I'm looking for ideas.

2902114
Okay... hmm...
How about the Noxium crystal? As far to my knowledge it isn't well known among most fans, but it was a weapon that was made of every hero's weakness and was capable of firing beams that would kill instantly on contact. It managed to kill SUPERMAN in about 2 seconds, so it can do unbelievable damage to anything else. It would make a good "keep away from the villains" item at the very least. (You did say some forms of kryptonite are lethal to changelings, and the Noxium is a modified kryptonite crystal.)

2902629
Interesting, you gave me a lot to think about.
Stay tuned, because I think I got something.
Thank you very much.

I like where this story is going so far but there are a few spelling and grammatical errors though.

2931346
Sorry for responding so late, but I've been a little busy.
I hope you like this use of your idea.:scootangel:

2945047
Well, since I don't even speak english I'm pretty sure that there are a sh*yay*tload of spelling and grammatical errors.:twilightsheepish:
Would you please point them to correct them, it will help me with my english and will help with the reading.

2957336
Sorry but I have not intentions of a Flutterhulk :flutterrage: (for now), but maybe she could be a chekhov's gunmare at some point :yay: (God knows there is a lot of chekhov's guns all over the place).

3151532
One of the classic villains of the Justice League.
Basically is a spirit of vengeance and the elemental of the dark side of the moon that is captive inside the black diamond called the Heart of Darkness who can posses whoever touches it and is not strong enough. He can also corrupts other beings through they desires, doubts and fears. Think of him as a magical version of Mister Hyde with super powers.
For more information go here and read the modern age description which is the one I'm using for this.

Stay tuned, the next chapter is almost done.

Wave the reason i have faved this story is that it is interesting to me and made me giggle a bit. Ive always love transformation stories but there isnt a whole lot of really good ones like 5 score and those other ones. I saw your story in my feed and read it and i enjoyed quite a bit. :rainbowderp:

3251259
You don't know how pleases me to read that. (I'm not sure if the spanish expression is applied right here).
Is an accomplishment to make a reader enjoy a story.

I like Doom Patrol, so this could be interesting.

That said, this is badly written. There's improper and missing punctuation all over the place, plenty of typos, and grammar is off. You should NEVER have multiple speakers in the same paragraph. There are also plenty of run-on sentences.

All of this can be fixed up nicely, though. Do that, and the story will be just fine. Or get a proof reader to do it.

3486810
Yeah... about that... you see... first chapter... my first fic... never written before... unfamiliar with the language... :derpyderp1:
I have no excuse, I'm really sorry for that.:ajsleepy:
But I'm trying to do it better in the next chapters, I hope that those are better than this. When I have enough time I'll do the "George Lucas" and fix this disaster that I call "chapter one".
Thanks for being honest and I see that you marked the story as a favorite so thanks for that too.
Now with that said. What do you think about the story itself?

3487701

Yeah... about that... you see... first chapter... my first fic... never written before... unfamiliar with the language... :derpyderp1:

I have no excuse, I'm really sorry for that.:ajsleepy:

No excuses necessary. Being a beginner writer isn't a sin. We all need to start somewhere - how will you get better if you don't practice? English isn't my first language either, anyhow. And trust me, I've seen works by actual english speakers that look much worse.:raritycry:

But I'm trying to do it better in the next chapters, I hope that those are better than this. When I have enough time I'll do the "George Lucas" and fix this disaster that I call "chapter one".

A second, careful look-over always helps. Particularly if you've left that chapter alone for a while. It's easy to overlook mistakes if you're proofreading right after you've written the material, so give it a little rest.

Another tip: When writing dialogue, you should never have more than one speaker in the same paragraph!

Example:

"Pinkamena, where this leads to?" Twilight was unconvinced to enter a hole inside a wardrobe in her friend's room. "To my secret lab of course. Don't you know anything about science? Every mad scientist must have a secret lab with an impractical entrance."Answered Pinkamena as she was explaining why ponies must breath.

:facehoof:

"Pinkamena, where does this lead to?" Twilight was unconvinced to enter a hole inside a wardrobe in her friend's room.

"To my secret lab of course. Don't you know anything about science? Every mad scientist must have a secret lab with an impractical entrance," answered Pinkamena as though she was explaining why ponies must breathe.

:twilightsmile:

Thanks for being honest and I see that you marked the story as a favorite so thanks for that too.

Now with that said. What do you think about the story itself?

Promising stories deserve stars too, and this way I'm alerted to updates. Doom Patrol is a fun comic, so a pony crossover is very promising. Admittedly I prefer the Grant Morrisson era (because I do so love an LSD trip without having to resort to actual drugs) but there's already a bizarre fanfic here crossing over with that. This is rather the more grounded Kupperberg era, and it's quite deserving of some attention too.

Now I've actually read all chapters. (I kinda failed to see that there were more than one when I wrote my previous comment.) The story is unfolding at a fairly decent pace, no real complaints there. The third chapter was maybe a bit heavy on the info-dump side, and the DC references all over the Pink-Cave seemed rather gratuitous. On the other hoof, Pinkamena as a resident mad genius serving as an advisor to the Cutie Mark Patrol was very fun. Stand-in for Niles Caulder? It's a novel and new interpretation of her character. (Of course, she could have been a great Crazy Jane, but that's Morrisson era.)

I'm hoping that we'll see more of what Discord's plan with this. Sure, it would seem like he's just messing with them for his own twisted fun, but it would be interesting if it turned out he gave the CMC superpowers for a reason, like 'Equestria will need some unconventional heroes soon, because something very nasty is coming this way'. If you want to use updated canon, you could probably have Reformed Discord do this to them. Of course, the Mane Six will be angry with him, at least until something comes along that they can't handle, and they realize that Equestria needs the Doom Patrol Crusaders.

Oh, and the bit where they asked for permission to go put out a fire felt so very Power Puff Girls.

If you can tidy up the writing a bit, this story will be just fine. I look forward to the next chapter.

3489614
Okay lets see it:

And trust me, I've seen works by actual english speakers that look much worse.:raritycry:

HA! Take that, writers I will provably never meet.
And I promise to take note of those recommendations so thank you for that.

Admittedly I prefer the Grant Morrisson era (because I do so love an LSD trip without having to resort to actual drugs) but there's already a bizarre fanfic here crossing over with that. This is rather the more grounded Kupperberg era, and it's quite deserving of some attention too.

Funny, I was trying to do more like Byrne than anything, I wasn't really thinking about Kupperberg (but you are right, this really look like his run on the series)

The third chapter was maybe a bit heavy on the info-dump side, and the DC references all over the Pink-Cave seemed rather gratuitous. On the other hoof, Pinkamena as a resident mad genius serving as an advisor to the Cutie Mark Patrol was very fun. Stand-in for Niles Caulder? It's a novel and new interpretation of her character. (Of course, she could have been a great Crazy Jane, but that's Morrisson era.)

Okay, first of all, yeah I wanted to gave all the explanations together but it ended being a long "all there in the manual" chapter.
Second, let see about the references:
Actually mean something: Discord's "funny guy", the cave, the Mare of Steel armor, the Thanagarian Wings, Grundy's appearance, the Cybertronian scanner, the different colors of Kryptonite, Pink's friend "from far far away".
Chekov's guns: The cosmic rod, Sweetie Belle having a Metallo's design.
Actually gratuitous: Everything that discord says, Doctor Insano's glasses, the boxing glove arrows, the Blue Beetle's gun.
And yes, Pinkamena is my view of the silver age Niles Caulder (an introverted sci-fi genius) being also the rational side to compliment Pinkies craziness. Also Pinkie being an expy of Crazy Jane passed through my ming but (spoilers) and also (more spoilers) but finally (the big reveal at the end of the (yes, this is a spoiler inside a spoiler)) so now she's the new The Chief.

I'm hoping that we'll see more of what Discord's plan with this. Sure, it would seem like he's just messing with them for his own twisted fun, but it would be interesting if it turned out he gave the CMC superpowers for a reason, like 'Equestria will need some unconventional heroes soon, because something very nasty is coming this way'. If you want to use updated canon, you could probably have Reformed Discord do this to them. Of course, the Mane Six will be angry with him, at least until something comes along that they can't handle, and they realize that Equestria needs the Doom Patrol Crusaders.

This story actually takes place fifty-two seconds (yes another reference) after the en of "The Crystal Empire" but Discord is just a villain, I really don't see him a someone who could actually reform, but you actually came very close to what I'm planing around his actions.

Oh, and the bit where they asked for permission to go put out a fire felt so very Power Puff Girls.

Actually from Giffen and Rogers run on Blue Beetle (the third one).

That's pretty much all I can say without saying that (even more spoilers). Thanks for the comments, they're helping me to put some thing on perspective (hindsight is something wonderfull) and actually pull this story out of the development hell where it is now.

OK, you asked for a comment, so I will deliver. I haven't read the whole fic yet, haven't had time.

I am a huge fan of the Doom Patrol, and while I'm more a fan of the Morrison run, I liked the whole concept of weird, isolated superheroes (also a big fan of X-Men and I actually think Doom Patrol does the whole "isolated from society" thing more realistically than X-Men does; I mean, who the hell would discriminate against hot women like Jean Grey and Ororo Munroe just because they're mutants? :-)) So this is highly relevant to my interests. Also I love the CMC and Discord.

From your replies I saw you suggesting that you can't see Discord as being anything other than a villain and therefore you can't get behind the concept of him reforming. Reform is the word they use in the show, but it's wrong. Discord is neither a hero nor a villain inherently; he's Trickster, a somewhat malicious aspect of it, but Trickster is equally capable of heroic and villainous actions because he is amoral and chaotic, which fits Discord pretty well. Discord being willing to moderate his behavior because he wants a friend is well within the range of behavior for his archetype, but Discord ever being a good being is not; that being said, it is also well within the range of behavior for his archetype to set things up so that there will be heroes who can deal with a threat the traditional heroes can't, but do it in an asshole way that ruins the new heroes' lives if they can't adapt. So he's a very good choice for "creator of the Doom Patrol" in the sense of being responsible for their powers. Thus far he's well within character.

Pinkamena as Niles Caulder is a very interesting choice; normally Twilight would end up in that role but Twilight is not really weird enough to be Caulder. I always liked Caulder; I didn't like what Morrison did with him at the very end, and I don't see Pinkamena going in that direction (Pinkie wouldn't let her), so this is good. Also your hints that Pinkie is Crazy Jane. (Though much as I love Rebis I hope this does not mean that Scoot is going to end up merging with a colt and becoming totally incomprehensible as a result. :-))

If you do end up adding in characters or character archetypes from the Morrison run, a good analogue for Dorothy and her reality bending powers might be Screwball (you want to have someone isolated from society for a different reason than the CMC have; being the child of a feared villain could function like looking like a monkey did for Dorothy, and Screwball having chaotic reality warping powers would make sense).

Anyway, I will refrain from further comment till I manage to read the whole thing.

4147225
Thanks for the comment, I was about so spam attack the "I just want a comment" group, so you stopped a storm.:pinkiecrazy:

It's hard to find another fan of World's Strangest Heroes these days but glad to hear that.

Okay, I'm not unable to see a villain being the "good one" neither seeing Discord beyond redemption. It's just that for me Discord works better a chaotic neutral.with both good and evil tendencies, like you said, a trickster. Good to hear that my Discord is in character from a fan of the guy.

At first Twilight was going to be the mad scientist with the secret lab and stuff but after the first sketch it didn't fit her character acting that natural in this situation but Pinkie on the other hand. But the problem with Pinkie was that she's not serious enough for the scientific approach till I remembered her "opposite" personality so I made Pinkamena the rational guy for Pinkie madness but also trying to keep things wierd around her as much as they are around Pinkie. And no, she's not gonna end like Caulder nor Scoot like Rebis did in Morrison's run, look for Byrne's and Giffen's versions instead.

Screwball doesn't sound like a bad idea, And was trying to fin something to do with her for some time, not now since I want to finish the Royal Flush's arc before expanding the team. If I use your idea I will properly credit you.

Take your time with the reading, I'm not rushed but I always glad to know which impact have my stories so feedback is something important to me. Have a nice day.:pinkiehappy:

4224005
Just wait for next chapter/issue. It's the Doom Patrol vs the Elements of Harmony plus Spike and Iron Will.
Yep, they're royally f---ed.

PS: thanks.

4287848
Thanks, coming from a writer whose work I admire and respect, that comment means a lot to me.
static.comicvine.com/uploads/original/5/52045/1130381-booster_cv32_02.jpg

4289217
Ah Booster Gold...how I loved him in JLI

Someday, a shouting match between Luna and Sweetiebot, please?

2902629 WHOAWHOAWHOAWHOAWHOA! theres a Crystal that can KILL superman...in 2 seconds? what series did that happen?

4534598
It was the 50's superfriends show.
It was so powerful Superman locked it in a lead-lined case of kryptonian origin that only he could open. Lex Luthor tricked him into opening it.

That was probably the only time you would see batman, superman, and green lantern die within a standard episode. It wasn't even a movie, the thing was so powerful it ended the heroes in about two seconds, no fight scene, just dead. The only reason the villains lost in the end was because the superfriends had clones/body doubles.

4566292
Hey, my first commentator. Long time no see. How have you been?

Ok the English is much worse in this one then the first chapter. although this mistake made me laugh "I will give you three witches, one for each one":rainbowwild:

I may edit this for you.

4646873
Please, I would be honored and my future readers will thank you.

4647099 I make no promises has I am shamefully lazy, and should be working on my own story.

Now if I do edit it how would you like me to send you the corrections?

4647128
PM is a good idea, but if you prefer another channel I have no problems.

Yes much better.:raritystarry:


And I like the new/updated parts, although you misspelled 'snap' and 'contained' in the bit about Discords past.

2902629

Wasn't that on the Super Friends? You know, that show that isn't cannon to either Pre or Post Crises continuity?

4662347
Yes.
But this is fanfiction anyway, continuity can be reshaped slightly or greatly for the sake of a story.
The story's quality should be the most important thing in fanfiction, continuity should be the second step.
Not to say continuity should be ignored, mind you, just that in official works and fan works continuity has varying degrees of importance.

4662987

The show started in the 70's and ended in the 80's.

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