• Member Since 7th Aug, 2014

PitchParade


Look at all the fucks i don't give.

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Found 283 stories in 62ms

Total Words: 7,956,774
Estimated Reading: 3 weeks

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E

Some ponies are shy creatures, and try to get through life without getting noticed too much. Other ponies are massive, hulking brutes that make as much noise as possible.

The two are seldom related.

Youtube reading by CaptainBron3y here

Chapters (1)
E

When Twilight Sparkle was given an invitation to a special event hosted by Discord, she was more than a little apprehensive. However, despite her best judgement, she decided to attend for the sake of being a good friend for the reformed Draconequus.

However, when she arrives, she realizes two very big things that Discord has done for this "party"...

One: Twilight is the only pony here.
And Two: There are quesadillas everywhere.

EVERYWHERE


I want to give a special thanks to my Boo Storm Butt for proofreading this for me.

Chapters (1)
E

Celestia wants to get into her throne room.

A kindergartener wants her to prove she's actually Celestia first.


(A stand-alone, no prior-reading-necessary part of the Triptych Continuum, which has its own TVTropes page and FIMFiction group: new members and trope edits are welcome. )

Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.

Cover art by EquesTRON.

Chapters (1)
T

Nobody really likes to move, you leave friends and loved ones behind, familiar surroundings and move to someplace that is different from what you are used to. You have to learn the ropes all over again, make new friends and find your way around, not an easy or fun thing to do.

But what makes a move like that worse, is when it happens and you sleep through the whole thing, doubly so when you didn't plan said move.

(Featured April 5, 2014)

Chapters (63)
T

Nobody likes visiting the doctor's office. Always telling you you're not healthy enough, have to go on a diet, eat less snacks and so forth. Not so with Pinkie Pie! She's been ready for this. Has planned for years for this special moment. Now, it all comes down to this.

What is taking the nurse so long!


Story inspired by mrbastoff's comic, which is used for the cover art. Check it out and his other stuff for some fun art. Editing done by my friends bathroomstahl and Meridian Prime, you guys rock! Pre-read by Foals Errand and Zomg. Cheers!

Chapters (1)
E

The Equestrian Society for the Preservation of Rare Creatures gives Fluttershy a rare opportunity to study a fascinating little sea creature, and she can't wait to introduce it to Discord. This can only end well.

This story is a birthday present for Fluttercordforever. Happy birthday, sweetie! (It's also an entry for Weekly Contest #26.)

Featured Box, 4 Aug 2015!
I won second prize in a beauty contest!

Chapters (1)
T

Anon is a cheap bastard, and hates paying to stay at places. Ergo, when Twilight threatens him with either paying rent or writing weekly friendship letters for room and board, Anon takes the free route. Too bad the free route is filled with frustration, confusion, and autism. Otherwise known as interacting with the local populace of Ponyville at least once a week.

>topkek

TRIGGER WARNINGS: this fic includes racial, homophobic, and equine slurs that are used purely for comedy's sake and are not meant to offend or cause a problem in the community... mostly.


"For some reason I've chosen to write more letters to that stupid Princess. Let me know who you want me to write about for future chapters." –Anonymous


PROFESSIONAL REVIEWS

:applejackunsure: –Okter

"Thank you for confirming my suspicion that Anon is gay." –Uniame

"So, did they get sexual harassment cutie marks?" –DRaily

"What the fuck anon" –Qaz223

"ANON DID NOTHING WRONG" –nothingtoseehere

"So majestic" –Xzaves

Chapters (6)
T
Source

Don't write on two hours of sleep, trust me.

A story with an Anon and the methods he takes to dissuade the Princesses from asking him so many questions about his home and culture. Lacking the basic courtesy of a pony and definitely disregarding their pride in magic, this human drops to lows that are usually seen only in the most disgusting of humans.

Enjoy or not, I had fun writing this and it's more for my sanity than anything.
PS- No actual sex is in this story so calm yourselves.


Professional Reviews

"drunk/10 not bad" –NuclearWaffles21

"I'm seriously rock hard right now." –Rebel

"yeah the 3 children in my basement won't shut the fuck up" –Winter the Gimp

"This is both extremely stupid, and written in such a way that I expect your non-trolly-stories to not be extremely stupid." –bobbananaville

"I don't remember how I found this story, but it was weird, and I liked it." –Narlepoax III

”I like story! Is very good! Now you go to Gulag!” –Joseph Stalin

Chapters (1)
T

When a human asks a certain purple unicorn a question that not even the almighty human race can answer, to what lengths would she be willing to go to put the age-old question to rest?

Chapters (1)
E

Salt is a terrible substance. Once a pony starts licking it, they can't stop.
It takes a truly brave soul to leave it behind...

This is an Anonymous in Equestria story. Please demonstrate your ability to read by not pointing it out an infinite number of times in the comment section. Thank you.

Chapters (2)