Remedy, She/Her, writing bad fanfics since 2011 and not stopping anytime soon.
It's just a normal dinner at the castle with in-laws. What could go wrong?
Well, quite a lot really.
This was an entry for a duo contest in Quills and Sofas I wrote with Holtinater like a year or two ago and just never got around to publishing it. So here you go!
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Entertaining; I liked it. The ending was a bit flat though, could have resolved with a few more lines but that's just my nit-pick.
I was expecting a funny excuse for a pun based on the title and the opening feast, instead I got a brutally believable tale of pony realizing Celestia micromanages her sims.
I see now that this did not come with the comedy tag I blindly expected.
Feels like Cadance can hook up with Starlight now, to deepen this drama...
...
Well, they both exhibited a manipulation of others to some degree, right? Might just as well find a common ground over that.
Saddest family dinner ever.
I hope Sunburst gets a decent end out of it as well.
I wonder what Celestia told Luna exactly--probably her ever constant plans for her citizens, perhaps.
Shining and Sunburst. Woah. Good for them.
When I opened it up , I initially expected a pun. Not a sad family dinner especially with a comedy tag.
But it's pretty good.
Can't help but feel that it needs the "sad" tag
Wow, just… wow. This is heartbreaking (especially given the pun in the title) yet feels fairly realistic. I like you managed to keep Shining sympathetic despite him cheating on his wife. There’s a nice little deconstruction of series here, pointing out how the events of A Cantorlot Wedding might have actually been traumatic for Shining, and how Celestia has been manipulating Shinning into a relationship. It’s an interesting, if cynical, look at things that makes the situation feel even more grounded. That being said, if I felt nitpicky, I would say that I wish we saw more of the reactions of the other princesses. Especially Celestia given what’s she’s been accused of doing and Twilight because… yeah.
Luna’s reaction got a good laugh out of me though.
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There is no comedy tag
I went in expecting humor and instead left with heartache.
Well done.
You know, it's pretty rare for Cadence to be the one cheated on and left for another. Well, excluding porn, those usually either have Shining being cucked, or Shining sleeping with others, but with Cadence's okay.
The real question is, why did Celestia apparently push for these two specifically to get together? What grand plan was there that she laid out when Shining was a tween? Maybe she knew something about Shining getting an alicorn pregnant would result in a natural alicorn birth?
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I must have just imagined it then. Oopsie.
Sorry.
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For what it's worth, Flutterpriest wrote a fic called Horse Divorce back in 2019, and it also starred Shining and Cadance (albeit with a far mare tongue-in-cheek take on the titular wordplay):
- MLP: FiM
- Comedy
What happens when the rulers of the Crystal Empire are stupid, terrible and get a divorce? Well, alcohol. And trying mostly trying to remember WHY they got a divorce.Any chance that it was what you were thinking of?
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It just playing into a trope "Celestia had planned in all" (I think it can be called MLP fanfiction trope, yes). The pairings in the show and the characters' roles can be seen as engineered by some presumably benevolent force, and I don't think that the writer was intending to go in-depth on this trope, not further than necessary
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Yeah I mean we wrote this like an hour where Holt wrote the first half and I wrote the second at the same time and we had like fifteen minutes to stitch this together. Don't look too deep into any of this at all.
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Starlight is probably already Twilight’s. I think Cadence would probably end up pissing off the wrong pony.
Celestia seems to be the type to believe the ends justify the means, while also telling herself that everything will work out for the ponies involved. Wouldn’t even surprise me if she only pushed them together under a hunch that they could produce a natural born alicorn. Keep in mind there aren’t that many alicorns to begin with, and the only way we canonically know how to make one is with Starswirls Spell, but that’s at best unreliable to make alicorns fast enough at a replacement rate, do we really know if alicorns are immortal?… or they just long lived? Maybe she’s attempting to breed a ruling class of sorts?
Either way, I’m glad they acknowledged that staying together for a kid doesn’t work… though I wonder how Starlight will react to her dreamboat being a colt cuddler?… Maybe Trixie will make her move? Cadence though… makes me wonder if she inherited/learned Celestia’s manipulative tendencies? She saw a cute stallion one day at school, and eventually groomed him inter “her” ideal husband and accessory, just assuming that because she’s the alicorn of love she knows best. Which I’m sure auntie celly encouraged too.
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I’m thinking Starlight and Trixie… they feel like a packaged deal. Only issue? Twilight gets a little too into her role-play with them.
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I believe alicorns are not immortal because not only does the cartoon not say they are but one of the books, the Journal of the Two Sisters mentions specifically that they are long lived so alicorns are not immortal and saying they are is fanon no matter what fans say.
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Pretty sure it was what I was thinking of.
Too short, ends where it would have gotten interesting.
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It was a speedwrite written in an hour
What the actual hell. This was amazing. Well done. God, I would love to see some expansion this because it's such an intriguing idea.
Nice! MLP as soap opera. But this really needed to be a multi-part fic, instead of a truncated one-shot which ended too abruptly.
Also, Sunburst and Shining came a bit out of left-field. But I suppose that's in the ridiculously manic and melodramatic spirit of the fic. Not bad. I wish you the best of luck with all future writing endeavours.
This is plausible under expectations that never made manifest. It doesn't take much to upend a marriage. I liked it.
Interesting idea, but it just sort of...ends? This is a concept piece that could really stand more exploration. As it stands, it's just a headcanon drop with some prose around it.
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Correct
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Based on
It sounds to me like Shining is LGBTQ.
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Extended canon is always a little murky (the book seems to imply that Cadence is a LOT older than she appears everywhere in the TV series, for example), but my best guess with this story's premise is that Celestia noticed that Cadence had the Crystal Heart as her mark, so the Crystal Empire was certainly going to return. Celestia was convinced that someone -- Sunset Shimmer possibly at first, then Twilight Sparkle -- would recover the full Elements of Harmony (otherwise, Nightmare Moon takes over and the world ends). So before any of the new Element bearers would die, since they would be mortal, having the Elements available to fight a restored Sombra meant Cadence needed to be married soon. Shining Armor was in the right/wrong place at the appropriate time to be the one Cadence needed to mesh with, and being the new would-be Element Bearer's brother was a bonus.