• Member Since 5th Feb, 2018
  • offline last seen June 24th


Fimfic Writer, Proofreader and Editor to those who request it, and a sucker for stories with parental themes.


Sombra and Radiant Hope ventured through every crevice of Equestria to gather the missing pieces of Princess Amore. One day, Sombra discovered the final piece and the return of their loving Princess was nigh.

But what waits for Amore in a world that no longer feels like her own. What purpose could she serve when all of it has been relinquished? And what could she possibly do when she does not understand who exactly she is?

Progress: 03/20

Next: Chapter 4, The Shadow

Art Cover commissioned by Doodle-Mark

Chapters (4)
Comments ( 48 )

Very interesting first chapter! I look forward to what happens next!

Comment posted by NebulaNyx deleted Feb 8th, 2021

Seems pretty interesting so far.
Nice to see other bronies that read the IDW comics

This is an interesting start! I'll stick it in my Tracking shelf for now. You should run it by an editor, though— you've got a bunch of tense switching and other oopses going on.
There are actually a few reasons based on show and book canon (see Twilight Sparkle and the Crystal Heart Spell) that Amore can't be Cadance's mother, but that's why AU's exist, innit?

Seems fitting for Flurry to be a key to her grandmother recovering her memories. Which since she has her personality are still in there, but clearly being crystalized smashed and reconstructed left her brain a bit scrambled.
Hopefully her Cousins will come vist too.

Very nice start! Plus, I'm a sucker for fanfics that pay homage to the comics which is sadly often overshadowed by the show.

Nice story. But I need some context, when did Sombra become a good guy in this?

This is from the comic timeline where Sombra is swayed by Radiant Hope to defy his destiny as a Tyrant has turned into a real unicorn thanks to the efforts from the Princesses.

Oh, Hmm. I’ll have to check that comic out. Thanks man.

Same. I was much more satisfied with his Siege Of The Crystal Empire depiction (👍👌) than his Beginning Of The End portrayal (👎🖕).

You have no idea how badly I wanted to see that entire "Saga" be brought into the show. I'd even accept them saying: "Hey look, The Mirror can go to other realities like it does with Sunset Shimmer's world." and I'd be happy with that so long as they animate the comic to absolute accuracy.


So much yes.

(sudden thought) I just remembered a funny idea back when that horribly cheesy "re-incarnated" Sombra was brought about, the idea basically suggested that yes unfortunately what we got was the real Sombra, but after a thousand years of being trapped in the icy climes of the crystal empire gave him a wicked sore throat/head cold (dark raspy CRYSTALLSSSS!)

Okay, so I really like the premise set for this story. But as it stands, it needs a little bit of clean-up work. I am not a trained pro, but I would not be against offering what little help I can to give you editing advice.

Can't wait to see where this story goes

“Wha…” Amore’s eyes peeled open before a bright light. The flash of light burned Amore’s eyes for only a moment before being saved by the shadow of her daughter. Princess Cadance vegetables stared down upon with troubled violet eyes.

Princess Cadance 'vegetables'?

Looks like you beat me to it. I was about to do the same thing.

What are Princess Cadence 'vegetables'?

“Last year, there was a surplus of tax leftover from reconstructions,” Shining explained. “Cadance noticed all the usual playgrounds around the empire had crumbled from an indecent during the Crystalling. We could have simply rebuilt them to their former glory, but Cadance wanted to make something grand for Flurry and the foals to revel in.”

I presume this should be 'incident'.

Interesting end to the chapter. Is Sombra going to be a recurring character?

Removing the hood might not make Flurry friendly to him considering the first time she met Sombra he kidnapped her. Though she wouldn't afraid of him so much as angry.

It would make sense, she has amnesia because of what he did to her, his guilt will remain fueling his desire to make things right. He figuratively and literally broke her, Sombra won't be at peace till she's mentally whole as well.

Lol! How!? How did that happen!?😂

Definitely. Sombra is one of the main characters.

I admit that's one of the more unique misspellings I've seen. And amusing. The 'sex' tag could have made that mishap turn into something completely different.

Seriously now, no worries. Mistakes happen. It's our job as readers to rub your nose in them. :rainbowlaugh:

Actually, in this universe, that never happened. From the comics, Sombra's redemption occurred before the birth of Flurry. So, this chapter is pretty much their first meeting.

Or I should say their first time interacting with one another.

So what is that word supposed to be then?

Nothing, actually. "vegetable" was somehow slapped into that sentence. I honestly don't how that happen. Probably when I ran the document through ProWritingAid.

Well that's certainly odd

But when Amore opened her eyes, she found her granddaughter now before her.

I know what you're trying to say, but this is saying the exact opposite. I'm guessing you meant something along the lines of 'nowhere near her'?

And as a whole, you really should run your chapters by an editor. There's a lot to be fixed here, too (though there were very few issues with tense switching compared to last chapter, so good job with that). Sorry if I'm being 'that guy,' but, y'know... it's m'job. Literally. All that aside—

I love where this is going. Amore interacting with her new family, regaining her memories, and trying to bring Sombra into the light (figuratively and literally) all at the same time might be tough for her, but I think she's up to it. Personally, I don't think I'd ever be able to call my mother-in-law straight-up 'Mother'— it would just feel way too weird. Good on Shining for indulging Amore in that regard.

No trouble, friend. It's actually much appreciated. Revealing my specific errors offers me a chance to avoid them in future writing. However, I'll be sure to find an editor for this story.

“Yeah,” Cadance said, averting her gaze from her mother. “You could say that.”

Oh ho :trollestia:

“That day when she made all of our guards fall for each other is still vivid in my memories,” Cadance said. “It happened the day after I read her a romantic story about the prince frog and mare.”

Sounds like an interesting day :trollestia:

Maybe you suddenly got an unexplainable craving for vegetables while writing :trollestia:

Personally in the comic I always felt she deserved what she got. Sombra couldn't help that he only was a pony on the outside not the inside. She knew the crystal heart was hurting him and didn't do anything to help him. She could have sent him anyway where he could be healthy and happy.

This is going pretty good. I hope she gets her memories back eventually

Awww, baby Flurry is so precious with Amore!!!

Nice cameo of Ember and Thorax! Great work!

Ooo the first piece of the puzzle falls into place, Amore remembers her Aunties.

Amore acknowledged her daughter’s request, however, before the group could make their exit, a pair of mares entered the room. “Surprise!” Celestia cheered. “Guess who’s here to visit?”

Geez what is this "Interrupt Royal Meeting" day? :trixieshiftright:


Such a adorable chapter! Cant wait for the next update. ❤

Oh yea I remember this. I like it also Amore pretty cute there :rainbowderp: Thorax be careful buddy

So happy to see the next chapter out! I'm addicted to this story!

Very nice to see further pointed!!!

Delighted to see a new chapter in the story! I'm excited to see what lies beyond the wall and what is luring Amore! I suspect Umbrum are responsible, but we'll see in the future!

It was worth the wait.

I apologize for the long wait. Had some personal issues with myself had to work out. Nothing serious however. It was just a long overdue reflection I needed in my life.

As Jmunoz13 said, it was definitely worth the wait! Life always comes first, and I hope everything is working out for you! Take all the time you need!

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