Fighting Evil By Pink Light...
~*~
“Are you ready?” Princess Luneko said to her sister as she readied the magical transport beam.
Duchess Celestipaws took a deep breath, then nodded in agreement.
“Yes, I have to be,” she said regally, smoothing her whiskers with one claw. “The time has come to again call on the forces of beauty, cuteness, and femininity to save our dimension from he forces of The Great Boredom. It’s the only way.”
Luneko nuzzled her sister, then stepped back and lowered her head. The crescent moon shape in the dark cloud on her feline forehead lit up in a shower of sparkles and glitter, and a pink light surrounded Celestipaws. The other cat hovered into the air, slowly rotating as etherial pink ribbons enveloped her. The sound of poppy 80s synth music sounded as the pink glow intensified. With a final, glowing explosion of rose petals and hearts, the white cat vanished, leaving her sister alone.
She sighed heavily, and looked to the place where her sister had once stood.
“Hurry back,” she murmured. “Our adorableness depends on it.”
When Duchess Celestipaws again opened her eyes, she was in a whole new world. There were no swirling pink ribbons around her, no pink columns, no pink rose bushes, or pink sunset sky. Everything was distinctly… not Pink. Instead, she was standing by a brink wall, on some very green grass, next to an odd, cold looking metal cage construction. She felt distinctly out of place, as if everything she’d ever known had been forgotten here. It all sent a shiver of discomfort down her spine.
“Settle down, Celestipaws,” she mumbled to herself. “You have a mission here. All you have to do is find the right human to make into the next Magical Princess Sailor Girl, and then you can rescue your home. So… where are these humans hiding?”
As if on cue, a loud, alarming bell ringing erupted in the air around her, setting all her fur on end. She yelped, and leapt into the air before turning to duck under a nearby shrub for cover. What was this strange place, she wondered, that there would be random alarm bells at such a lovely time of day?
As annoyed as she was, her frustration soon turned to relief, for humans quickly began to appear from the large brick building. She held her breath in anticipation, as many of the strange creatures came together out on the grass, by the metal half-cage structure. To her confusion and surprise, a few of them seemed to be holding weapons, but they did not use them against each other. Instead, one would throw a ball to another, and rather than batting at it and purring like normal cats did, these humans tried to hit the ball with a weapon!
“How strange,” she whispered to herself. “I wonder if this is some training exercise. Perhaps… I will find out who the strongest, prettiest warrior is this way.”
She knew that she had very specific qualifications for her next Sailor Girl, and one of them was fighting ability. Far more important, however, was an inner beauty that shone outwards. An aura of loveliness and sweet femininity. It might have been easier if she could tell which of these beings was actually female, but surely, whatever human was cutest and strongest would be a picture of womanhood.
Just as she was beginning to grow concerned that none of these humans would live up to her standards, Celestipaws’ eyes caught on a very striking figure.
There, standing tall and holding a very pink bat, was a sleek form. It raised its head as it hoisted the bat to its shoulder, then cocked a jaunty hip out to one side. It tossed its head, and its dark midnight blue hair shone in the sunlight, sparkling with beads of sweat that could have been dewdrops. It opened its long-lashed eyes slowly, smiling a confident little smirk, and gave a nod to the human holding the ball. As Celestipaws watched, it swung the pink bat, and hit the ball with a blinding amount of strength. The ball practically exploded away from the bat, and all the other humans oohed and ahhed as it flew into the sky and out of sight.
Celestipaws looked the human up and down as it trotted coolly around the field, like it was taking a victory lap. It only took her a moment to decide for certain that yes. This was her Sailor Girl, there was no doubt about it.
Flash Sentry slapped a high five with one of his friends as the bell to go back into school began to ring.
“Nice one!” his green-haired buddy said. “You completely knocked that one outta here! Even with that girly bat!”
Flash tried not to blush as he glanced down at the bright pink baseball bat he still held in his hand.
“It’s for Breast Cancer Awareness month,” he said with a shrug. “Not like it’s my favorite color or anything.”
What he didn’t say is that he liked carrying that bat. He liked it so much that he didn’t know the name for how it made him feel. It just felt… right. Like he was supposed to be bathed in that color at all times, and it was fated that he be that way.
“Hey man,” his friend said as he trotted back towards the school building. “Whatever works for you, and as long as you keep hitting homers like that.”
Flash sighed once the other boy was out of sight, and lovingly ran his hand over the length of the bat, wishing he didn’t have to make excuses for owning it. It really was such a lovely shade, and it really did feel like a perfect self-expression. Ah well, a boy could dream. For now, he had to get to English class, and he was pretty much the last one left outside.
He was about to head in, he suddenly heard a strange, female voice shout to him.
“Wait!”
He froze, looking around for any sign as to who was speaking.
“Uh…” he called out. “H-hello?”
“Down here,” the voice said.
Slowly, Flash Sentry lowered his gaze until his eyes rested on the form of a white cat. It was like any normal cat, small, fluffy, and cute, except that this one had a large yellow sun mark emblazoned on its forehead. He knelt down to peer more closely at this strange creature. He locked eyes with it, and suddenly, it seemed to glare at him.
“You know, it’s very rude to stare.”
He yelped, and jumped back from the cat.
“W-what…y-you… you spoke!” he said in shock.
“Well yes, I figured it was the best way to start a conversation,” the cat said with a shrug. “Anyway, I come to you with important news.”
Flash Sentry was still trying to wrap his head around a talking cat, but he sensed urgency in her voice and felt it was only right to be polite.
“O…kay?”
“My name is Duchess Celestipaws,” she said regally. “I am one of two rulers of the pinkth dimension, and our homeland is under attack. The Boredom is an evil force that makes everything brightly colored turn drab, gray, and boring, and it’s threatening not only my world, but this one as well! You may lack much cuteness in this world…”
Here she paused to look around in open disdain. Then she shook her head and continued.
“…but it still is quite bright and lovely, and deserves to be protected.”
“Uh… okay?”
“So,” the cat went on. “I came to this dimension to find a great warrior of strength, beauty, and femininity that can help fight back The Boredom. And when I came here, it became obvious you were the one I was seeking.”
Flash sentry blushed deeply, and looked around with a furtive, sheepish glance.
“F-femininity?” he stuttered out.
Celestipaws nodded and gestured towards the bat.
“Yes, that was the first sign of pink I saw when I arrived, and you hefted the weapon beautifully.”
Flash Sentry got the sense that he should explain that there was lots of pink everywhere, and that he wasn’t a girl, but this whole situation was so weird that he just wanted to see where it was going. instead, he just nodded in understanding.
“Alright, that makes sense, so…”
“Well, I think it’s a lovely weapon, but I want to give you a very special scepter instead,” she said, puffing out her chest in pride. “With it, you will be able to take on all the powers and adorableness of a Magical Princess Sailor Girl! You’ll just have to say the magic words, and it’ll transform you.”
As Flash Sentry watched, the cat lowered her head and the sun on her forehead began to glow. The whole thing was bathed in gold and glitter, and a long staff with a pink gem at the tip materialized out of her head. Breathlessly, Flash Sentry watched as the staff levitated over towards him and placed itself in his outstretched hands. The staff wasn’t heavy, but it tingled on his skin like pop rocks on the tongue. It was striped in gold and white marble, and was only about the length of his forearm. At the top, a heart-shaped pink gem surrounded by golden wings gleamed. It was the most amazing, girly thing he had ever seen.
He looked down at the scepter , then up at the cat, then back again. He knew this wasn’t for him, he knew that he wasn’t the one that this cat was looking for. But at the same time… could he really say no to this opportunity?
“What do I say?” he asked, his voice cracking with anticipation.
The cat shut her eyes, and recited some words proudly.
“Pink Princess Power!”
Flash Sentry licked his lips, swallowed hard, and closed his eyes too.
“P-pink Princess Power!”
All at once, he felt his body levitate off the ground. He opened his eyes to find a pink glow surrounding him. Glitter and sparkles streamed around his body, and ribbons protruded from the scepter. They flowed towards his body, and enveloped him beginning with his hands. His clothes melted away, instead becoming long white and pink gloves. Then, his feet were wrapped in light pink thigh high boots. His pants and jackets were replaced in a burst of shimmering magic, that became a rainbow and pink pleated short skirt, and a bodice that emphasized the place where his breasts should have been. He could feel a bow tie itself across his lower back, as fluffy and lovely as a cloth butterfly. Last, he felt a cold metallic form across his brow, in a bejeweled golden tiara. Around him, hopeful enthusiastic synth music played.
At last, he lowered himself to the ground, and steadied himself on his high heels. He opened his eyes, and found the cat smiling up at him proudly.
“Now, raise your scepter princess… say, what is your name?”
“Flash Sentry,” he said, voice trembling with joy as he smoothed his hands over his skirt and waist.
Duchess Celestipaws clapped her front paws together.
“Oh that’s a fantastic sailor name! Now, you are Magical Princess Sailor Girl Flash Sentry!”
But Flash Sentry wasn’t even listening to her. He was walking over to the dirty window of the school, staring at his reflection. He touched his tiara, his skirt, his gloves, his whole body, just staring in awe at the person he saw staring back. He even had perfect pink lipstick on, and the blush across his cheeks was very becoming. It was as lovely as he’d ever been… he wanted to look like this for the rest of his life.
“I…” he said breathlessly. “I look like a girl. A cute girl!”
He heard a moment of silence behind him.
“Wait, you’re not a girl?”
Oops. He froze, then slowly turned sheepishly back towards the cat.
“…uh…”
The cat glared at him, and he could see the wheels turning in her head. Flash Sentry sensed that the jig was up.
“Is there something you’re not telling me?” she demanded.
Flash looked around the area quickly, then back at Celestipaws.
“Hey, does this scepter give me the power to run really quick or something?”
“Well yes,” she said, “But I don’t see what that… HEY!”
But Flash Sentry already had a solid head start, and his lead was quickly gaining. As Celestipaws tried desperately to keep up with the magical crossdresser, panting hard, she rolled her eyes and let out a growling meow.
“Next time, I send Luneko to do this part,” she grumbled.
-END-
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What doth life?
9235065
I HAVE NO SHAME, THAT IS MY LIFE.
I don't even... what?
9235075
Yes.
9235082
Fuck it
have a like
You missed one.
Clearly Flash shows up for baseball practice again the next day, and transforms right before his at bat. His friends are all like "WTF!" Then he beans the clock tower with the ball. Which is on the other side of town.
"Hey, yeah... Whatever works? ...for you man."
9235119
Thanks for that catch! I thought I got it.
WHAT.
9235126
YES.
"Commissioned by Skirts"
...You know what I'm not even surprised.
~Skeeter The Lurker
9235157
I'll admit, it seems like him in a nutshell. At least that was my intent.
I've been pretty deep inside Skirts' mind before. I've read Flounce!. I've had numerous conversations with the guy pertaining to the pinkness. I've even written work for him. This... this made me feel as if I'd stepped into one of his lucid dreams. Very well done, ten glittery stars and a petticoat twirl to you.
I only have one question.
Is the color pink in this story?
9235182
Maybe.
9235191
Then let the adventure begin.
I took one look at the cover art and was like “skirts wrote this, didn’t he?”
I mean he didn’t but I was close.
9235208
I take this as a victory.
This isn't your everyday skirtsfic. This is refined essence of Disney princess and petticoats, carefully blended with the purest pink stolen from the ancient vaults of Lisa Frank and suspended in a bath of Dr Pepper.
I am in no small amount of awe.
9235226
N-no u.
(Reads the synopsis)
I....I think I'm going to go lay down now. Maybe while questioning life.
I pink you did a great job here, Pencil. You really rose to the challenge. Lilac at this and see a quality story.
9235236
I am doing so right now. Might I suggest a stiff drink too.
9235238
First of all, how dare you.
9235245
Sorry to be a thorn in your side
Super Machiavelli Girl Lyrical Golden Pinafore Daedalus Alpha Tres Cross Delta Xrd Championship Edition Accent Core Plus R Ex Gold 2.8 Redux Go!!! And Knuckles! ™
(also staring DANTE from the DEVIL MAY CRY series!)
PowerPlay-Advance Color-Boy Box S4©
Also available on the 2DS!
SMGLGPDATCDXCEACPREG2.8RG, or as it is properly pronounced in fan circles, "Smugglg pad at cidex seas preg-2.8-erg", truly is a master work of the modern era.
So much pink and frills. So much raw power in a pleated skirt!
And Celsticat. Is. Best. Cat!
I want to be a Sailor Scout, too!
Reading the title made my eyes cross.
Then I saw anonpencil and was not surprised.
Goddammit.
Meanwhile in class, Pinkie Pie starts to shudder in her seat. A look of dread crosses her face.
“Oh my gosh! My Pinkie sense is going wild. It’s like there was a party for everything pink and I wasn’t invited.”
**Reads synopsis**
No way this has to be right up...
"Written as a commission for shortskirtsandexplosions"
Oh. never-mind then, explains everything.
9235067
I wanted to look away--but I couldn't!
derpicdn.net/img/view/2017/9/5/1528816__safe_screencap_flash+sentry_a+banner+day_equestria+girls_friendship+games_eyes+closed_glitter_smiling_solo.jpeg
It's pink and fluffy and pink and awesome and I love it.,
Some one beats me to another story idea, Good luck with your story.
I wish you the best.
...No man should wield such power.
... dodge a bullet there ...
Ha gayyyyy (sorry I just had to lol)
Pinkasso was here.
Awesome! Now spike's turn for femininity!
...huh?
What...
Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
9236378
Agreed.
I'm here for this.
i.imgur.com/AqwCNx7.jpg
you did indeed go overboard into the sea of pink. I don’t think any of us actually regret that.
Given your commentary, I’m almost afraid to ask what the original ‘active and specific imagination’ of the commission was like.
"They told me I couldn't pink... BUT I DIDN'T LISTEN!"
This wonderful bit of strangeness reminded me why I visit this site and love this fandom.
I read this and meditated deeply for 16716947 microseconds. I have come to the conclusion.
this is art
I'm not actually going to read this, but I'm giving you a thumbs up because that title and synopsis made me laugh until I cried.