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Admiral Biscuit


Axe Body Spray: Confounding ponies since 1983.

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In an attempt to promote the 500 HP 2020 Mustang, Ford puts 500 Super Bowl tickets in a shipment of Matchbox Mustangs and sends them to Canterlot.

Unicorns don't really understand American Football, but they do understand supporting a team . . . perhaps a little too well. Especially after a few beers.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 211 )

Unicorns on Earth ruining the Super Bowl? I think I have seen almost everything now. :rainbowwild:

I love a good football story.

Gotta love sports ball!

rip Super Bowl, rip in unicorns.

This is impossible!

Both the Colts and Broncos are in the AFC, so therefor they would be playing to ADVANCE to the Super Bowl, not actually be it. Unless, of course, you made a note that in this story that the Broncos went to the NFC in exchange for the 49ers, then this would be possible.

8712066
That was going to be my question. I don't pay that much attention to the teams and leagues enough to know who's in which one. :rainbowlaugh:

8712070

That is what Google is for :pinkiesmile:, but other than that little over sight, I really did like this story. If the Patriots win tonight on a Hail Mary, I now know why in advance :rainbowlaugh:

8712083
I don't really care much for either team, but I have my reasons for rooting for the Co—I mean Eagles.

Very timely. Looks interesting - I'll read it when I get back from the gym. I should point out though, that the Broncos and the Colts are both AFC teams, so they cannot meet in the Super Bowl. AFC championship game, yes (though they never have), but not the Super Bowl. Sorry, I'm really into NFL football.

Dreadnought

I could care less about the specific teams myself, the story was funny and showed that drunkenness and spellcraft is a bad combo.

It could have been worse, it could have been a darts tournament. Someone could lose an eye...

Surprisingly amusing, although it's a bit detached. That's the price of an omniscient narrator who doesn't focus on individual characters.

Still, better than I could have managed with the scenario.

Unofficial sequel "Twilight was watching the game with her friends. Gets super pissed that unicorns would cheat knowing its frowned upon in Equestria. Tells all of the worlds sports federations. Now several unicorns are happily employed as spell spotters. The end."

This so explains why the magic blockers are in place in the Equestria Games.

I would usually be on board with this. But...2020 mustang? I don't even like the 2018 mustang 😂

Ooooh! Have I been fed a central character for the Budweiser Clydesdales story?

I think I have, you know!

That was a fun story!
I was wondering something though. How is it that only unicorns bought all the cars? Don't pegusi and earth ponies like to collect cars? Maybe it's just a unicorn thing.
Might be just as well that Rainbow Dash or Applejack weren't there. Can you imagine the destruction?!

Fucking unicorn ponies.

Pffffffft!

And this is why you think before you market. Aww, who am I kidding.

But it was the fourth quarter, the game was on the line, there were two small, opposing clusters of fanatically loyal unicorns, and the ponies had drunk a lot of beer.

Yep, there's the line. Goes right along with "And he lit the fuse" or "The hangman pulled the lever" because bad things happen right afterward.

During the extended official time out, the unicorns sitting there had been escorted out of the stadium.

Some of them under their own power, some carried, one of whom fought and clawed (metaphorically) far more than expected, leaving a set of drag lines in the concrete and the fading cries of, "No, please! Darling, I promise to behave, it's just those horribly uncouth barbarian Broncos were quite obviously cheating and-- Not the hoofcuffs! They'll leave creases in my fetlocks for positively weeks..."

They probably thought the nosebleed seats were outside of the unicorns' maximum range. Those poor fools...

Ah well. Here's hoping today's game will be half as interesting.

As a person who doesn't understand football at all but can read, I gotta say that I enjoyed the story concept.

8712215
the cars were shipped to Canterlot, which is of unicorn majority.

Please do a sequel with fluttershy watching the puppy bowl.

8712678
This is the most important comment ever made on fimfiction.net.

There was also a spirited discussion about the halftime show and whether Nickelback's music was up to par with the requirements of the genre or not, or for that matter if it could even be considered music.

Nickelback offered to perform an encore, and was politely told ‘thanks but no thanks.’

Heh, poor Nickleback: Forever the red-headed step-child of Rock 'n Roll.

8712066 On top of that, magic technicolor ponies who drink Budweiser without making ironic references to the color and smell of horse fluids. Best to suspend your disbelief, all-around. :raritywink:

......whats a hail mary pass?

8712066
Sure, lets go with that. :)

8712880
Basically it's a last second LONG pass usually right at the buzzer. It's usually a long shot desperation play that often time fails, but when it works it wins the game.

And I know it's an impossible fantasy story, because Osweiler is still in the league two years from now.

8712897
Referring to the Roman Catholic rote prayer of the same name. It is almost never the correct play call, because it is obvious to detect and counter. Usually the result of a play in a do or die moment going pear shaped and the quarterback says screw it and throws the ball to the in zone.

8712617
Yeah, that's right. I almost forgot that fact!

YEEEAAAH!! GO BRONCOS!! WOO HOO!!

8712880

Catching the Golden Snitch.

8712880
See the last play of this year's Super Bowl.

I like it, and now imagine them playing Blood Bowl...

I was a little disappointed in the flyover this year. P-51's and A-10's and they only show them for five seconds?

8713862
u see the cloverfield paradox prequel trailer for netflix?

Down on the field, the players didn't particularly notice anything was amiss through the first part of the third quarter. Sometimes the ball seemed to bounce a little bit strangely on the turf, and wide receivers alternated between lucky catches and heartbreaking misses. Once, for no apparent reason, Luck simply dropped the ball on the hike. He said in the huddle that it felt like it was covered in oil, and he simply couldn't grip it.

Ok. I don’t understand football. But I understand football dosent work like that.

Gah, this can't happen!!

Colts and Broncos are both in the AFC!!!


Strangely that is what stuck out to me more than anything else

>broncos vs. colts super bowl
also both teams are in the AFC division so good luck with that
lol

8714164
Those types of things have happened. Not exactly like this. But they do. And the bit with Luck... Sadly, the Colts are my local team. so yeah that is sadly a thing.

This needs to be turned into an animated short.

Favorited before reading, not disappointed.

Especially since Baron Realization—one of their former draft horses—had learned to write in Equestria

Wait, so they were sapient after all? New twist on that other story. :rainbowlaugh:

when an intern suggested that they couldalsogive away 500 Super Bowl seats to lucky ponies.

what could possibly go wrong?

From there, the remaining Matchbox cars went to a Canterlot merchant, and by the eve of the 2020 Super Bowl, there were four hundred ninety nine unicorns in attendance forking over bits to get Colts and Broncos memorabilia.

Even in Canterlot that seems statistically unlikely... do only unicorns like model cars? :rainbowhuh:

Your team loses => RIOT :twilightangry2:
Your team wins => RIOT :twilightangry2:

When it comes to sports, Earth Ponies for Football (Both American and European), and Quiditch for Pegasai... Unicorns with their thrice cursed magic are not allowed to play sports, imho. lol

8712007

Unicorns on Earth ruining the Super Bowl? I think I have seen almost everything now.:rainbowwild:

How about unicorns playing in the Super Bowl (possibly while other unicorns ruin it).
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