• Member Since 28th Jan, 2016
  • offline last seen Yesterday

BatwingCandlewaxxe


We were somewhere around Ponyville, on the edge of the Everfree, when the Poison Joke began to take hold.

T

Ditzy Doo, known to some as "Derpy", is not a "smart" pony. In fact, she's developmentally disabled, and every day is a struggle to just get by. But despite all that, she loves life and especially loves stories — loves reading them and loves making them up. More than anything else, she wants to learn to write, and share her stories with the world. When Princess Twilight discovers an intelligence-enhancement spell that could enable her to learn faster and more effectively, a spell that could make her "smart", Ditzy is overjoyed to be the first pony to have her intelligence enhanced. But not everything turns out as planned, and unforeseen consequences of the complicated magic prove to be a greater blessing, and a greater curse, than anypony could have expected.

An homage to Daniel Keyes' short story "Flowers For Algernon", told in epistolary style.

Many thanks to A British Gentleman and King Moriarty for their helpful editing recommendations.

Thanks to deadrose for the cover image.

Chapters (58)
Comments ( 83 )

I... This is extremely depressing...

7884712

It gets better in a bit.

Then it gets worse. :trollestia:

7884755 Oh dear.... Does it get better after it gets worse again...?

You already know my thoughts on this story.

I look forward to seeing other people's reactions.

I feel so sad for Derpy :(

7884762

I... This is extremely depressing...

It gets better in a bit.
Then it gets worse. :trollestia:

Oh dear.... Does it get better after it gets worse again...?

It has the Tragedy tag for a reason. :raritydespair:

Oh god, I really need to start looking at the tags more.
Not sure I want to continue reading this... :(

7887040

Well, in my opinion as the author, the good parts are worth reading despite the sad bits, and the tragedy is intended to be more bittersweet than depressing, so...

The thing is, this is actually a really good sad story, mostly because it just doesn't seem like a sad story on the outside. Everything seems all happy, but you get the feeling that things are not as they seem.

Keep going!

Tbh I faved just because of the Derpy. This however turned from a pony of favourites to an unforgiving tale to what I call an Alternate Universe. It really intrigues me and encourage you to keep writing. Thank you

I don't like tea either :/

7891563
Then you are dead to me.

The tea is the life...

Heck no I read Flowers for Algernon and I cried my heart out. Why. Why would you do this.

Gulp, good luck Dinky. I'd be scared too.

7894501

Because life is not all sunshine and moonbeams and fluffy pink unicorns dancing on rainbows. Because sometimes the most noble and worthwhile moments in life are also the most tragic.

And because I'm a complete bastard. :trollestia:

7891580 Well, I don't like coffee either :derpytongue2:

I just realized this reminded me of "Lawnmower Man"

This story is an amazing roller coaster I like the little forboading elements and how it keeps me guessing what's gonna happen from week to week I can't wait to read what's gonna happen next :derpytongue2:

This is ponified Flowers for Algernon and I feel sad now.

Pretty good start, but as someone who loves derpy, I'm also pretty fucking insulted. You're saying my favorite background character isn't just "mentally handicapped", but what in the 70s we would call mentally retarded (medical term at the time, not an insult...until people started using it as one). Now I'm not saying you have to rewrite this whole thing, but give Derpy a break and give her some basic first or second grade grammar and spelling skills.

Same as last chapter:not asking for much, just to have a few words that even someone like Forest Gump could spell right, like "like" or "nice". Or other basic, two-four letter words.

...to Derpy's credit, english spelling makes no fucking sense 9 times out of 10.

7910568

Seriously? You're getting that haired-out about a fictional character? :rainbowhuh:

7911371 Yes. Yes I am. Besides, you've earned your forgiveness back with these later chapters.

Ok, just to say one thing...
I'm just not a fan of the gay shippings. I can overlook it in a story, but it just bothers me when writers make non-confirmed gay pairings. I can tolerate them in a story, but it just annoys me. Not that I have anything against gays, but I think that the reason it annoys me is that its just so easy. 98% of the characters in MLP are female, and therefore its super easy to make two established characters like each other. But its just not creative. I would much rather someone go through the effort of creating a original character to pair with one of the M6 (or whoever the story is about) then forcing two of them together. Not even sure you plan on doing that, or its derpy being derpy. :derpytongue2:
This has been ST4RSK1MM3R's rant on gay pairings.
You may now continue reading.

7914719 Sometimes, you really need to think and ask yourself: do I need to make this comment? Is it necessary that I make this comment?

7914722 No of course it wasn't, but it was something I felt I needed to say, mostly just for me, and it doesn't really have anything to do with the story. You can happily ignore my comment.
Toodles!

I must admit I did not like the first half of these little vignettes of this story mainly due to them being written in broken English. However, once that passed and they started being written in proper English the story became much more enjoyable to me.

Where can I read Flowers For Algernon?

I knew the intelligence spell was too good to be true.

7925185
Probably a library. I don't know if it's online anywhere.

There are two versions of it, the original short story, and a novel-length update that was written later by the same author. They're both very good, but the short story is my personal favorite. It also got adapted into a film, which was titled Charly.

I have a bad feeling about this.

Wow that was hard to read. I get that your using that as a way to gauge how smart derpy is but...jeez ! I can't tell if she can spell her own name properly.

It took five chapters for me to be able to read derpy's handwriting fluently. I hope that learning spell is strong.

7941490

I hope that learning spell is strong.

That's putting it quite mildly.

Hm... this looks? like! the; parallel: entry! to" when (Charlie) discovered, "the [joys] of punctuation!!!!!

7948539
I have an appendix I'm still debating; but there's no epilogue for the story, as there isn't really anything more I can say about the character.

Ok, while I admit it's a good story, it failed to make me even remotely sad. Interesting concept though.
(The only story to give me feels so far the third and final book in The Adventures of Ford Mustang series. I recommend you read it here.)

7941547 Okay, you were right that spell was a dosie! But creator of the spell was moron to not include a warning to the spell.:facehoof:

This has been a truly riveting piece. From start to finish, I was engrossed by Ditzy Doo's journey through her intellectual endeavors. I thoroughly enjoyed the read. Thank you.

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