A guy with too much time on his hands. Enjoys writing and over-analyzing things.
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On the eve of the Summer Sun Celebration, Spike discovers all of Ponyville has been trapped in a deep sleep by an unknown enemy. What's more, even he himself is falling victim to the spell. Fortunately, the Princess of the Night is wide awake, even when she sleeps.
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this looks really interesting and with a lot potential.
hope to read more soon.
Take care,and thanks for sharing this story
Sounds promising. I don't read many Luna fics these days, and I've been meaning to correct that, so I'll definitely get to this one soon.
Can't wait for the second chapter!
Great so far, , ,
Yes Spike.
Why do you want to know?
"If I do let you see her dreams there could be a chance she might see your dreams too"
"SPIKE!"
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5457916 I've already started on the second chapter. Hopefully it won't take too long. I'd rather not rush it, though.
Glad you guys enjoyed the first chapter.
YAY! New JT Story... a Spike one at that.
Hmmm, well, you do seem to have learned your lesson about Spike with the last story.... and no I am not letting that go anytime soon. Plus Luna! Well let's see how it starts.
Poor little guy, just wants to get a little sleep. But yeah, while he's always eager to help Twi, we've also seen he is NOT a morning pers... errr Dragon.
Case in point. Though honestly, likely could have worded it better, feels rather clunky as is.
Okay, given the description we know who this is, so does come off as just playing the pronoun game to try and drag out non-exsistant drama. Then again, if it wasn't for the summery, and you just started reading without knowing anything about the story, it would work. So really no good or bad about the approach, just a lot of YMMV.
And RIGHT after I start to get annoyed at her being evasive and think this might start getting a tad to drawn out.
Get out of my head! ..... again!
At first, I was like, "What Town Hall? What!?" Then memory kicked in, prepping for the Summer Sun Celebration. So likely the Sisters, or at least Luna are in town for it. Very nicely done. Giving that bit of exposition about them being there, without ever having to say it, and explaining why, without outright telling, just giving s a few facts and letting everyone work out how well they fit. Very nice.
Okay, this went rather fast, where'd the book come from? The apple?
Is it the one where you just come right out and tell him what's going on?
Then again even with Sweetie and Scoots, while she did explain some things, she more showed them, pushed them, left some up to them to figure out rather then simply siting down and telling them everything. More a guide for them then leading them. To bad that doesn't quite work with Spike. So yeah does make some sense for her to act that way. Now, id her next plan just coming out and explaining what is going on?
You couldn't have said that the first time he was confused by you telling him to wake up?
And wait, the wooden soldier.. you mean the wooden pony head? So is it all Luna, or just her head?
.. re-reading..... okay so it's still a wooden pony head, just now Luna's?
Though point of order.. the Fridge lead to the Basement, it was the Pantry that led to the bathroom.
Ohh and the apple and book popping out of nowhere... even knowing this was a dream, stil overlooked that explanation... ohhh VERY well done.
And that rare moment when you do realize it's a dream, and look at all the things you ignored that seem so obvious.
Wow, that... is some description.
So, was it his mind that created that kind of messed up nightmare scene, or whatever is the villain here?
Case in point... secondly, story, GET OUT OF MY HEAD!
Huh, that does kind of make sense. Okay Luna you get a pass on that. Very nice explanation.
Well it does for me, but given this is Spike.. I'm going to guess he has no clue what the hell she just said.
Though guess be a bit awkward for Rarity to show up with Luna watching.... then again.. who knows what dreams she likes to peak in on...
BUHWHAHAHA! And yeah, he thinks that's weird, not because you know Princess of the night and all that, but simply because he knows Twilight would never let somepony fall asleep on her when there is work to do.
And yet, it so fits for Twi to do that.
...... GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!
For the love of Faust Spike.... SHUT UP! Just let her explain already since you clearly aren't going to figure this out with her holding your claw the whole way though.
And you are Luna and Equestria's last hope of overcoming this?
Whelp.... Equestria's doomed.
Spike is going to have nightmares for a year after this.. isn't he?
Okay, we'll chalk the blatant and overdone obliviousness up to just the whatever it is keeping him dreaming or the dream itself clouding his thoughts a bit. But that won't fly if he doesn't start to not act like an idiot.
SHE DID! If you would have just shut up for two minutes for her to explain it. Or realized that's pretty much what she was saying the whole time.
Wha!? This whole thing has been her trying to bring you INTO the loop, but you keep running off without waiting to hear everything.
What kind of mage can't cast a decent Fireball or Cone of Cold spell?
Well it really is a case of him being the last hope... yeah you all are fucked.
So, guessing reasons. First, he's a Dragon and the sleep spell is tailored for Ponies, so it won't hit him as hard. and two, he was already asleep when it hit, so that did something to it.
So, deliberate, or just a side effect? If the first, then whoever is doing this is very smart, and very powerful to be able to do that. To be ready for Luna's powers and find a way to nullify her dreamwalking...
Hmm, so tailored then, if it keep her totally out of the other Princesses, and blocks most of other ponies.
Orr, it could still just be a side effect of the spell, and the spell is simply concentrated stronger around the other Alicorns. Being more focused to keep them asleep, and the side effect making it harder to reach them. And would work with the theory of the spell being set for Ponies, and so Spike only gets a small dose of it.
Wait, that accounts for ponies IN and near Ponyville, what about Cadance? If this is night time, like it seemed to be suggesting, wouldn't she be asleep? Couldn't Luna reach out to her and tell her something is up and get help that way?
Next up, this leads to a hilarious image of Luna going through all the other ponies she tried to reach before settling for Spike. Other Alicorns, the mane 6, that nice wall-eyed mailmare, Big Mac, and Spikes expressions the list of ponies she thinks would make better saviors then him gets longer and longer. "Those CMC foals, oh and then I did manage to contact this one newborn foal in Ponyville Hospital finally, but sadly she wasn't able to understand Equestrian yet so couldn't help, so finally I tried you."
Hmm, that makes sense to, and is more or less the same idea as mine, didn't think about the spell fueling itself off the ponies it hit. So would that also explain why it's weaker for Spike then?
Spike, she JUST said she can't wake herself up.
CALLED IT! More or less, okay so I was off in a few minor details, but the overall idea I was right
Yup, they're bucked.
Very nice. Making clear we aren't in dreams anymore. And in a way that makes sense. Not just Spike reminding himself because the reader needs to know, but the sight being so surreal that he needs to remind himself. Being something he'd expect to be a dream it being so out of place.
Nice work.
I mean if some pony collapsed in a bad place wouldn't it make sense to help them get somewhat comfortable?
Okay far enough reason not to try contacting somepony outside Ponyville, no clue how long they have to get to town.
Wait, and she DOES contact them, just in case. While also doing what they can to help NOW in case things are time sensitive. See, this is why I love your stories... one of the reasons.... so few cases of ponies being idiots. Damn, VERY NICE! Also, GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!
Though that does raise the question, if she's going to send the message anyway, but they might be asleep so not get that, why she doesn't just visit there dreams to tell them.
Huh never even thought of that... and also....
...
... this is just creepy...Just as I got to this point and Discord got brought up, my music randomly started a new song. (The song starting wasn't random, have he playlist set to random, and a new one queued up).. Discord.
Whoa... that's creepy.
Spike, this is Ponyville, not The Crystal Empire. you know everypony will forget about it in a few days.
If it wasn't for Luna putting her hoof down on Celestia, you might have been able to score a window out of it at least.
Pretty much
Yeah, feeling really bad for Luna. Poor mare, stuck trying to get Spike to save them all.
Given my joke about the newborn foal being the choice before Spik as savior.... GET OUT OF MY HEAD!
Okay but I think I see, start small. See if he can wake them up, break the spell get some idea on how he could do it. On the Ponies whoever it is is least likely to notice. That makes sense.
BUT what doesn't is waking up the foals past that. Since who the buck will take care of them? Just leave them there awake and alone? And with the silence in town, a foals screaming in fear, or hunger, or just because it's a foal is going to be very noticeable. I get the start small, but why not start a little bigger, say one of the CMC. At least they can mostly look after themselves.
Whoa, so he's going into their dreams?
Into a foals dreams... this.. is going to be interesting.
Well, this reminds me a lot of Moonlight. Though already much more well done then that. (Same basic idea, evil force is trapping ponies in their nightmares, and Luna recruits someponies to help her fight them. Though the CMC in this case. Nice idea, but the story just didn't use it very well.) But good mystery, very amusing overall, and nice build up for whatever is coming.
Yeah this is going to be awesome.
You did such a wonderful job with A Delicate Balance, and I'm certain this new offering will be equally enthralling.
5468035
Who's to say that the author isn't actually Luna, and this is all a dream?
5478884 I'm not quite that meta.
The Wicked Witch of the West (who also goes by the name Hydia...) used those darn poison poppies to put ponies to sleep!
GLINDA!!! Y U NO MAEK SNO?!
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"And that's how Equestria was made!"
Pinkie finished typing out her fanfiction, giggling to herself. She wondered if her characters would ever realize that she was breaking the fourth wall from both sides.
All right, good start. Spike and Luna do play off of one another very amusingly, so they should work well together as main characters. It gets things started a little quickly, though. I feel like it might've been better to have Spike explore and work the situation out for himself a bit more, instead of Luna laying out all the known information for him right off the bat. That said, I obviously don't know where things are going, so maybe this approach was the best one.
In any case, Spike saving the world by entering the ponies' dreams is a good premise, and I'm already pleasantly surprised by the Cake twins getting a prominent appearance. Very interested to see what a baby's dreamscape is going to be like, and if they'll actually be of any use to the rescue operation. Thumbs-upped and Tracked.
Oh, and I found a small typo: He stumbled backward into the library and close the door behind him.
Seems pretty heavy on exposition-- infodump. Spike's need to interrupt Luna was more bothersome than character building.
However, the concept interests me. I will certainly continue to stick around.
Wow, good story!!!
Intriguing hook and wonderfully constructed dreamworlds so far. And of course you have everyone well in character as usual.
Love seeing the dream logic slowly dawn on Spike again.
Wonder how long it will be before he gets used to it.
Do robot bronies dream of electric ponies ?
Luna said that he don't have time to contact Princess Cadance. But what is the plan? If plan is wake up every citizen of Ponyville and Canterlot, it's hopeless. Ponies will start to die from dehydration in 3 days. While in dream time flows differently, he can't go directly from dream to dream, he need to walk to a pony in real world and physically contact them. How can he save everypony before it's too late?
I think something got left out here.
5635643
As I understand it, Spike is just the foot in the door, because his draconic nature prevented the spell from completely taking hold, which in turn allowed him to wake up on his own. The Cake twins (well, one of them anyway) are basically a test on a subject that's not likely to attract the attention of the big bad. Once he starts waking up adults, though, everypony should be able to start waking up more ponies, at least after an appropriate explanation and assuming they aren't needed for something else important, like watching the twins. If, however, Spike remains the only one who can wake up others, he should at least be able to wake up the mane 6 and the princesses to combat the big bad directly. Or, maybe he won't be able to wake anypony else up and he'll have to do all the hero stuff himself, waging an epic dream battle against Nightmare Cheerilee, who is upset that nopony properly appreciates education. Honestly, I don't really know where the ride is going to go, but given the author, I'm betting it's going to be a lot of fun getting there.
This is really cool. I'm liking the portrayal of Spike... Not exactly a coward, but definitely reluctant to jump into action. It seems to be due to self-confidence problems, rather than out of selfishness.
Well this is certainly interesting. The premise, the characterisation...
Very interesting.
Okay, new chapter, YAY!
And have time and energy to commentary finally, double yay!
That.... feels like one very oddly worded. Very clunky feeling.
You are in a foal's dream. It's going to get surreal in no time. But make sense they would be dreaming of this place.
Why? Unless.. AH! He thnks the 'go into their dream' thing failed since he's seeing where he left. But, is he in the foal's bedroom too? Or in another room in Sugarcube corner. Not to mention, are the foal's right in front of him? Cause I doubt they are dreaming of them in their cribs. If not, that should be a sign that something changed. And that he's just... not all that attentive. Yeah Spike is not wowing me with his powers of deduction so far.
And yet, he this does feel rather in character for him to be both that oblivious, that borderline dumb about things due to not actually thinking them through, and that line, really felt like him.
Wait, the fate of the town, if not the world is resting on him, and he's thinking about getting back to bed because he thinks the first plan didn't work. Okay, I can see him not realizing it worked because he really didn't want it to, and so ignoring the small hints it did. But being that close to just abandoning his friends to this? Just "Whelp, tried one thing halfheartedly, it didn't work, screw you guys I'm going back to sleep." And yet, it still feels rather in character given Lesson Zero. just, the more negative aspects of his character that make so many people dislike him and give the feeling the writers don't give a shit about him.
And cue the surrealism. Now how long will it take him to catch on?
Wait.... going back to sleep... okay the above gripe... alright story I'll let you take a pass on that if he wanted to get back to sleep, not to sleep, but to contact Princess Luna. But still should have clarified that.
Also
I'm with you Spike.
No, this actually makes a lot of sense for a baby's dream. The real world, just slightly twisted, everything larger due to their smaller perspective. And with a few oddities thrown in like the flying cakes that explode into glitter. They are all around both cakes, and Pinkie Pie all day more or less. But yeah where is Luna, and where are the foals?
Hmmm, time issues? it just takes her awhile to get into the dream, and since time flows differently, it's only been a few seconds for her, despite how long it's taking? Or is it being connected to the foal's dream interfering like it made it harder to contact other ponies? Or have things gotten worse for her?
Another good point. Really should have told him the whole plan before this, just in case.
Priorities Spike. And yet, yeah I laughed. At least he added that last bit.
Makes sense. Also, CALLED IT!
Really loving your Luna. Penchant for understatement, just the slightest bit odd, taking things in stride and just pushing on, such a great take on her.
Yup, this Luna is awesome, and also, very frustrating for Spike, in the best possible way.
It isn't an invalid viewpoint. But also, would have been nice to plan for such issues.
And they both have good points, but overall, gotta side with Spike on this one Princess.
Hmmm oddly worded. It tried and succeeded at making him fall asleep. That worked. It then tried to make him start dreaming, but failed that and shunted him into the Cake Twins instead. But the overall explanation does make sense.
YAY! Though doesn't mean he's safe, cause there's always the chance he might have to venture into Pinkie Pie's dream..... Doubt it being a dream would insulate him from the sanity rending possibility that might entail. Or just wandering into some dream hat will scar his fragile little mind.
"Luna, you're already here! And Twilight! And Celestia too! Wait, Umm Luna what are you.. Twi why are you...? Why does Celestia have a... a... NOOOOO!!!"
Okay Spike, you just made a really good case for her not explaining things to you, and how she should have told you everything. And now that she wants to, you rush off without it?
Twins having fun 'helping' mom and dad make the tasty treats?
Orrrr not. Well this was unexpected. Okay what caused this?
So not a fun, make things be fun and happy and weird dream. But a scary, alone, everything so big and frightening nightmare?
Taffy Puller machine went nuts?
Just roast the stuff.
GET OUT OF MY HEAD!
Either should be heard, or 'still could hear'
A 'place' of cupcakes?
She tried, you ran off like an idiot before she could!
Alright Spike, not a total idiot just... impulsive. If you take the time to actually think, you can work stuff out pretty well. Just need to remember to TAKE that time.
Probably a bit of both, but more leaning towards the first option.
Hmmm, this is... interesting, and could come up with a lot of ways to explain this. How it works, why. but, is it everypony that is having nightmares? With the focus of the nightmare being what is keeping them asleep? Or could some be having pleasant dreams, with the focus being what is keeping hem asleep? Is it going to be the same thing in every dream? Fins the source, kill it, repeat? Or will each dream be different this one having such a large, obvious focus, something so plain and direct because it's in the simpler mind of a foal?
Or you are on your own because that forced her out of the dream and it will take her to long, or to much energy to get through again. But, guessing the Twins got sacred of the machine at some point. Maybe had an accident around it. Or just, were near it when it started up, and it was big and noisy and terrified them.
Yeah keep hearing that one all over.
So, he's never seen the taffy puller before? Just try tasting a bit of it, maybe that will jog your mind.
......................................
Damnit JT, Get out of my freaking head!
Should you have known what is was the whole time?
Aw, okay way less scary then what I was thinking might have happened, but still scary enough for little ones. Thing breaking down, making loud, screeching noises, taffy and parts flying everywhere, yeah that could traumatize them for a while.
It should, and it will be won't it?
Well, arcade cabinets are canon so... okay story you get a small pass on snark for that one.
SPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!
yes Spike, you defeated the hideous, vicious, unbelievable evil of.. a taffy machine.
Well I could snark at what high esteem she holds Spike in, and yet, given what she's seen so far, I can't really fault her for that image of him. This is making the "Well you were the only choice left after a newborn filly in the hospital nursery" joke from last time seem all the more legit. Can't help his self confidence, but he really only has himself to blame.
Well this is certainly ominous.
Capitol N? So, return of the Nightmare Forces? Going with the comics version of them, or a separate version? Either way, well, this story just got a whole lot more interesting. Also, they likely know you are here and messing around now so, well... there's that issue too.
But overall, really great chapter. Yeah Spike was a little frustrating at times in how dense he seemed, but it was an in character dense. Less stupid, and more impulsive. Simply not taking the time to think. Luna was AWESOME! And, did answer the issue of the Twins being awake with nopoy to look out for them. They are still asleep, but a natural sleep rather then the nightmare enforced sleep.
And given it's The Nightmare. Guess everyponies dreams will be those, awww was hoping for some variety, some nightmares, some happy dreams, just a wider range of options. But yeah story is shaping up to be awesome as usual, just hope the dreams don't get repetitive. That was the biggest issue with Moonlight other then the lack of explaining things and general lack of reactions from anypony not the CMC to events.
5641872 Ah, another one of these. Just to clarify, the reason Spike wanted to go back to the library to sleep doesn't have anything to do with him giving up. As far as he knows, Luna can only contact him while he's sleeping, and his best bet for falling asleep is to get in his own bed.
You'll get more info about the Nightmares in the next chapter. And don't worry, I'm planning to give the dreams plenty of variety.
5642516 Yeah I realized that was likely what he meant later on, but at the time, it was rather unclear. So yeah could have used a bit more clarification he meant contact Luna. Only even minor issue with the chapter. Rest, amazing! And I'm sure you will, just train of thought writing and that was what was on my mind about possible concerns.
EAT SPOON! i love this story, will some of the dreams be sneakear? With ponies contained in dreams that they themselves don't want to leave? Or with ones that dont feel like dreams? Dreams are always so Interesting to think about.
Well done ! MORE!
Poor Rarara.
I can relate. At least the end was kind of sweet. I wonder if she can participate in the dreamwalking now....
I'm guessing the dream was largely populated by Rarity's past failed designs.
Is the key thing a reference to Super Mario 2? Awesome.
5847151 Yup. I almost had actual floating masks chasing him, but I figured that it would be a little too blatant.
Damn you JT.... freaking super long chapters..... you're just getting back at me for making you read all those wall of text comments aren't you? Well... jokes on you, this also means you get an even larger wall of commentary to read so
Okay let's see what we got...
Hmm, first instinct was to add another point to the "Spike being a dumbass board but, looking more.. yeah can't blame him on this one. He only heard 'nightmare' while the reader saw the capitol 'N' this is something specific format so knew what she was talking about. So, good job on that. Subtly giving the reader more info then then him, in a way that makes sense, very nice.
Also, typo already...
Missed and an 'a'.
Well, can't blame her with the way Spike has been acting so far. But this one is all on Moonbutt not properly being able to make clear she's talking about a capitol 'N' nightmare just through tone.
Well.. true but.. that's a whole other type of dream right there. Nice way to slip that joke in by the way.
GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!
Ohhh nice name. Eaters of abstract concepts. Yeah don't remember this one popping up int the thread discussion but... very nice. Me like.
Huh, is she talking way back then, but then other matter like say, Nightmare Moon came up? Or, recently and keep getting interrupted by Equestria being on brink of destruction ever few months?
And all this, really puts even more on her title as "Nightmare" Moon. So, was it these Nightmares that turned her? Just a name she picked because of the fear connotations to it? Or, well, with her Dreamwalker ability... punishing ponies for daring to sleep during her beautiful night isn't out of the question....
Just the ones that would make good foes for Twi to face. but yeah I do like this. The ones they have to face again are the ones they had no other options for. Though, brings the question, which is considered the more extreme punishment? Stoned forever, or locked in Pony Hell forever? And in Sombra's case, they didn't even realize he was being sealed, but figured he was just outright destroyed, and he pulled a fast one on them.
Huh, so this was very very close to her turning into NMM. Star Swirl it could have been centuries and he'd still be around. Firefly though, have to be a fairly small window she was old and skilled enough to be a general and help with this, and still be the first leader for the Wonderbolts.
See i like this. Scared, but not letting it get in his way. "True courage is not a lack of fear, that either is insanity or stupidity. It is being afraid, and continuing on despite that."
*rechecks title* 'Fashion'.... gee I wonder who it's going to be.
Though one plus side, since these things have no existence at all in the physical world, and their magic apparently cant touch Spike in more then minor ways. He's pretty safe wandering around town.
Yeah... that doesn't work. No way that can be right.
That the whole dream only took two minutes, yes that makes perfect sense. But that it's been way more then two minutes between now, and when it struck Five. No way it's been just that. He heard it chime five before he even reached SCC, then had a bit of a breakdown where he froze and had to force himself to keep going. Took time to have a small panic attack and get over it. Get to SCC, find the twins. Psyche himself up for this. Have the whole dream thing. And THEN make it all the way from SCC to what I'm assuming is Carousel Boutique? All in less then two minutes? Even if the dream was instantaneous, he still would have taken far long then that just in travel time. Let alone the panic attack.
Hey already pointed that out. And.. you're going to play with this and have some twist come up when we are least expecting it aren't ou? Well it won't work.. now that we know to expect it when you think we will be least expecting it. We will be expecting it at that time. Which, means it won't be when we are least, so you'll put it when we are expecting it, because knowing it will be when we are least will make it most, so not when.... oh bugger, I've gone cross-eyed...
damnit JT/Spike.... now I'm going to have to stop at Taco Bell on the way home from work tomorrow.
Awww how sweet.
Sorry I just had the very very evil image of her 'Nightmare' being that she's in a relationship with Spike. but still very nice little sentiment.
So what is her worst Nightmare?
wait, in a cave of some kind, that she's tried to make look fancy with a lot of gold... no... no way.. that was a joke....
Couldn't decide which phrase worked better, so stuck in them both?
Her nightmare is having to watch as Sweetie Belle takes over making all of the dresses for her shop?
Hey, you're the one that tempted the universe with that line. Also, Hi Luna! Spike, just hope she can't play back her favorite memories from dreams she's seen. Well you can hope not, I'm hoping she can, just edited it into a massive blooper real of you trying to save them and getting stuck like this. Now, just hurry up and make with the flame breath already.
Pessimist. You have a clearly defined goal, and a clearly defined obstacle. instead of whining about it, work on a solution.
You know, forgetting once in the heat of a dream is one thing. Twice in a row.... not so forgivable.
Well, not a bad strat. Action is rather meh. not bad, but nothing great. However, question Spike. Why are you trying to force your way through the middle of the mass of animate clothing, rather then simply walk along the edge of the room? Yeah it might be a longer trip but, safer.
Yes, you really do need to work on your one liners if you want to act like an action movie star.
Ooookay then....
Each snippet makes sense on it's own, but string together like that........ yeah she's lost it.
And was it Celsius or Fahrenheit?
Nice touch, and yeah this does make sense. Now, how long will it take for this to make sense to Spike? So, instead of simply vanquishing some monster, he has to help rarity over come the fears the cage represents? Going to be hard if she's lost in her own rambling head.
Huh, orrrrr, not treat the underlying condition, but simply find a way to manage the symptoms...... that could work.. not quite sure how to feel about it but.. could work, see where it goes.
He has a point. Still love the idea she tried the newborn foals in the hospital even before trying him. But, he's doing alright so far. Also, really liked Luna's little speech. Never really get this type of thing addressed that I've seen, and good explanation of why they need to do this. Spike, you are perfectly clear in his, and it needs to be done. What will matter is how you react to and use anything you learn while doing his.
Well, it is a nightmare. So it's things she would find horrifying in the first place
But do like the potato thing. that not everything in here has some deeper metaphor to it. it's not all some significant look at her deepest psyche. Sometimes, it's just a random chunk of data her brain pulled into the dream because it needed something there. Do like pointing that out.
But, if that place you are least likely to look is where you look, then it won't be there., meaning it would be i the first place you are likely to look, but won't. Which will be where they think you are least likely....... JT you made me go
again.
Damnit... GET OUT OF MY HEAD!
She's got a point.
And now i want to see Twi and Luna working on something together, both talking in such thick jargon and technical terms, that everypony is just utterly enraptured by the debate, while having no clue at all what is being said.
So exposition time?
....... Seriously..... how? Get out of my head already!! Though also, no bad Spike, we WANT this to happen!
Ah, the ones that she tries hard to repress and forget ever existed. But sadly, because Spike left the safe open, she now much confront those horrors, and will be overwhelmed by them. the repressed memories filling her head, making her go insane. Turn her entire fashion line into hideous foal apparel. And attack ponies with straightening irons.
Is it a bad or good thing I fully understood that?
unless you want to play Ghost of Bad Birthday Parties past and show a filly a memory or something. Then again could also be influencing Sweetie, to make her alter the dream, by triggering the right thoughts once she was lucid. But I do get what she means. This is all a mental landscape. Even Spike is perceiving it through his own filter, He's linked, and part of it. So should be able to do small things. Likely mostly just around himself. But also likely takes far more concentration and care then he has access to.
Point: Luna
Couches are really advanced, insatiable bests of destruction and hunger. They consume all. laying i wait for their prey. I'm not surprised one tried to devourer the Royal crown, thinking doing so would give it power and make it the rightful ruler. (Hey I said they were hungry, not smart.)
D'awwwwww. Also, I see where this is going so.. by the logic going on in the thread right now, means it's horrible.. for.. some reason... whatever..... anyway, yeah see where this is going. you did find the 'key' just have to realize what it means.
That... seemed depressingly way way to easy....
I am NOT taking responsibility for that. And I meant from a mental perspective. that it would be a key, just, boom there. Not having to realize anything, nothing more then there, but slightly vague hints about it. Just.. seems rather.... easy and clear and.. odd for a dream, Not that Spike didn't have to fight something or deal with issues. But... just find the key.. which is a key.. turn lock and everything is better.. feels... weird.
He's going to get so used to dealing with everything with fire, he'll be totally lost when he ends up in a dream where everything is fireproof.
Time to play soccer with the key? Still, rather stupid not to try and grab the key while he's got it out in the open.
huh... that works too.
Well that's nothing odd, she can do that while awake too.
oookay so that's where the title came from and... I have no clue what it means.
So this chapter. Ehhhhhh, liked the last one better. This one just.. felt to.. plain. To, normal. the whole solution was just, to mundane. If it wasn't for the aesthetics it could have been anypony dream. And, it didn't feel like a nightmare. Or at least, never went into the feelings of it. Why this was so horrible for her. She just.. snapped. And.. yeah it was all a bit to vague and at the same time, ordinary. Some of what it meant was pretty clear. But it really could have been focused on more. on the meaning versus... cage, key, insert and free. Something like this... it wouldn't be out of place in the waking world baring some details, that could just be the result of magic. It had some aspects that could have been used to actually look into Rarity's mind, her troubles, her fears but... just ignored those for.. not even action cause the action was rather meh too. not great, but not bad either just.. there. The whole thing was just, to generic. Didn't take advantage of the situation. And while the tiny bit of symbology Spike and Luna brought up makes sense overall for what was really going on. it was so over looked and ignored by the rest of it hat it just.. felt lacking. What the cage was, what the key was, I do get what it was going for. her fears, her worries, with her friends and family, being what helps her through. but the execution just felt... lacking. Again hard to really describe beyond.. generic.
That said, loved the Spike and Luna banter. And overall it wasn't bad just.. kind of meh.
I dunno, I think it's kinda sweet that in her precious memories box she only has memories of herself helping Spike, not the other way around. It'd be kinda messed up if her most precious memories of Spike are when she accidentally conned him out of his snack, or watched him not succeed to save her, or the countless hours of him simply doing what she asked.
Of course, that bodes poorly for his crush on her, since that would indicate she values when she helps him, not that he can help her, and might be a little on the "he's a helpless kid" track, but... it's still kinda sweet.
i.imgur.com/15UIwDT.png
Huzzah! Spike and Luna save the Day (hopefully...)
I can't believe I missed this until now.
Excellent work, I look forward to the continuation.
To the clubhouse! And beyond!
I feel the same as Luna, get more confounded every time.
Also, this is the second fic I've read with surprise shared CMC dream.
Yay, update!
And great chapter, too!
Alright more Spike-ception antics, and whose next?
Also.. damn that chapter length, you really are just doing this to try and make me regret the commentary aren't you?
Well I could see her having that issue, and wanting that.. and is sweet Rarity thinks of her first but... yeah I can already see why you were having issues with this one. It does feel rather... off. Just, not the same level of "Yeah this is totally the characters" coming through as usual for you.
Good point, and if only it was that easy. Though already covered why that can't happen. Spike can enter and not get trapped because the spells aren't made for a dragon, Rarity would likely just get trapped again.
Wait just a "No you can't"? not even an explanation why? Despite having one already set up? Just "nope."?
Well.. it IS a dream... (cue horribly cheesy 'porn' music.) Of course you know Luna would pop back in just as things were getting good.
But yeah this I can see Spike doing, and he still feels perfect. And also, nice going Spike.
Well, Rarity can't really take issue with that, and makes sense on several levels. And at least unlike Spike, Rarity rated above a new born foal in Ponyville hospital.
Damnit JT.. GET OUT OF MY HEAD! Granted not the Exact situation but, close enough.
I'm with Rarity on this one....
wha?
So was it always this way? Some, aspect because she's a foal? Some glitch in it? or, is this them trying to alter the dreams now that they know Spike is doing something, and Sweetie's is just the first she checked?
Well, that's convenient.
She is in the ultimate Lucid Dream. If you can get bored with that level of ability to do ANYTHING you want.. you have bigger issues.
.... OHHH yeah took me a bit to work out he's already in Sweetie's Dream. Was like 'wait what why is he outside?' Okay nice fake out and, yeah no real point in showing him go upstairs, unless there was something odd about how she was sleeping or something. Also, another good reason for rarity to never have brought Sweetie to Manehatten. You know she'd be lost within like fifteen minutes.
Hmm, possible. Also possible Sweetie's just that weird with her dream. Or that this is a result of whatever oddness Luna detected unrelated to the two..
Huh.. so it's not Sweetie... and not The Nightmare... some other force at work trying to protect her? This is getting interesting. Well even more so then it already was.
Told you. Though she's going to hate it when she manages to have the time and resources to sculpt the greatest fashion line EVER, one that would be world famous and live on for centuries as the ultimate height of fashion. And then can't remember any of it when she wakes up.
Well, can always try climbing up to the top of Town hall or something to get a better look.
.....................................................................................
.. Get out of my head!
Okay.. that is just creepy.. so, the whole dream is inside a giant ball? What the hay is going on?
And before you get lost again. You really need to dream yourself up a PipBuck and get the way point for that set up.
?? Ohhh swapping to somepony beside Spike? nice.. and waan't expecting that. Or... fake out?
?? okay so... who is she talking to? thought it might be Rarity but... ths sure isn't her... her own personal little nightmare? Oh, or her inner issues and self doubt and what not, since she's in her own dreams more or less?
Also, really love the imagery and the idea of her doing things like this. Really nice.
Wait.... if he found Sweetie.. then who was that Pony Luna detected?
Oh also, really loved Luna's whole bit so far, explaining the dream, doing a really good job of it and... damn that was good. Though, maybe drove the point a little harder then needed about how it's not exactly like what she's saying. How the things she using aren't precise metaphors, how things are like this, but not exact.. just trying overplaying that aspect a tad.
Also also.. why is she asleep, in her own dream?
And given it's a dream, that might just be literal. ..... and now I want to see Luna burp out a stream of butterflies.... How do you keep making me say these phrases that I never even thought would exist to not think I'd have to say?
Wait... okay so she wasn't asleep there just, curled up in a ball and not doing or saying anything?
Dun DUN DUN!
Delicious tea.. or deadly poison? Yeah... Spike.... really gotta feel sorry for the dude having to deal with all this.
No laser shooting? Luna!? I am disappoint.
Sweetie is taking all this rather..... quietly.. especially for her...
After all this... who can blame him?
....... yeah.. me either. Unless.. that's NOT Sweetie Belle.. but a decoy from The nightmares, and it's the real Sweetie Luna detected?
......................... what the hell.. seriously.. stop it! I am seriously not reading ahead when I type this stuff...
I'd go with Scoots. The oily snake thing.. that's just the Nightmare being a Nightmare.
Well they have both been taken on dream trips by Luna, maybe that did something that lets them do this?
Wow.. low blow nightmare... and yet... yeah what else would Scootaloo's worst nightmare and deepest fear be but this?
AHHHH Luna is really She Who Walks Behind! RUN FOR IT SPIKE! (Hey it works if you've read The Dresden Files... which you should that series is bucking awesome.)
She's just messing with him now isn't she?
Eh, fair enough.. and yeah figured that was the reason.
...
Well... fuck.. yeah that is a problem. Granted could also be a solution, or a problem for the Nightmares, since being able to team up and be with each other could lead to ponies not giving into their spiel about being hopeless.
AKA, find Applebloom?
.....
So, the lack of active nightmare was because it was dealing with Scoots.. maybe AB. Is Sweetie's whole deal that they are done with her? Have so messed with her head, made her so hopeless and terrified they've drained what they can from her?
Plus, a clothesline isn't exactly know for being sturdy. Bast bet, toss on end to Scoots, have her tie it around herself, and then use her wings to hover/glide over softly, and let Spike pull her the rest of the way up.
It was so bad, Luna took one look at it, and seriously considered going NMM again, just to get banished somewhere far far far away from it.
.... that's Nightmare Moon isn't it? Or at least Luna's own inner struggles that led to her becoming NMM? Even in wholly unrelated jokes... you end up pulling stuff out of my head.
HUZZAH! I found a typo! HOW MANY POINTS DO I RECEIVE!?
Well... okay then....
Yup... so now you get to go find Applebloom too.
Well that was easy.
Oh crap.....
Wow, and going right for the ego shattering... it's efficient.. i'll give it that, going right for the knockout blow.
Maybe?
"The bad news is.. I found the Nightmare."
... Well at least it wasn't the same wording.
OHHHH i REALLY like this. Admitting to things that are obvious, not hiding from the truth, but also fully realizing what it means. And how it doesn't mean just one thing. Similar, sure, but also different.. really like this.
HEY!!!
Well, likely back to the club house.
Really not sure just what happened here, how it broke he spell. Getting them to the clubhouse yeah, but how did that work? Eh either way, interesting chapter. Can see some of the roughness, the CMC were really really really (heh) flat. but that was intended. Rarity also didn't quite come out as well as your characters normally do. Things did feel a tad less polished then normal, but still good.
More "WTF is going on" revelations, and learning more about the bigger plot. And LOVED the Luna segments. So yeah another good chapter. liked this cream better then Rarity's, Cake Twins one was still the best though.
Now to wait several months for more.
6110575 Yeah, this one took me a while. Also, yes, there are some hints at things to come. Heh heh heh...
I'm really anxious to see the rest of the mane six's nightmares. I'm sure you're planning something really devious for them. Twilight is going to be a tough one.
Yay updates
Why didn't Spike breathe fire on the timberwolf?
Once again, Spike manages to be goofy and awesome all at once. For that matter, everypony else was kind of awesome too.
6422085 I actually initially had a scene in there where he attempted it, but I couldn't find a place to put it that wouldn't slow down the pacing. It failed due to the fact that green wood doesn't really catch fire easily, and Spike can't produce enough flame to damage a timberwolf. In short, if he had tried, they'd probably have just resisted it long enough to attack him directly.
6422287
Indeed, I always through this was a bit of fridge cleverness in the original episode. (And possibly the only bit you could argue showed Spike firing on all cylinders that episode - in that he didn't try it because he was smart enough to know he'd be wasting his time and flame.)
I was reading this and thinking "the CMC all alone together with free reign on Ponyville and indestructibility, that's going to end bad-- welp, they they go; that was fast even by their standards...!"
No worries on needing a break from writing this story for a bit. The length of the chapters is amazingly long and I can't imagine writing 12k+ words for one chapter much less three as you have for these past few installments.
Great job on the latest installment and take as long as you need to get reinspired to write more.
Take a break if you need, but don't abandon the story, okay? Too many stories I read and love seem to get abandoned :-(
Wow you picked an odd time to update, between RL crap, and DOWAS updating... you planned this, didn't you?
Okay so, what does Spike do now?
Quick recap for those of you that forgot what happened last chapter.
Huh, makes sense to me.
And then she pops up behind him right now......
Yup, saw that coming. Poor Spike. And bet she was trying to actually show up in front of him just as he spun around.
Seriously JT... get the hell out of my head.
Given how utterly freaky that RD balloon thing looked... I do not want to think about what she looks like right now, I'd rather avoid nightmares.
You have actively engaged them, to the point they've made it a point of chatting with you. I think they know by now.
Wha... bu.... how!? Again, he's directly interacted with the Nightmare messing with this dream. How do they not know he's messing with them by now?
Wait, so, can a Nightmare not leave a dream it's entered until the pony wakes up? Id each Nightmare stuck in it's own dream world unable to communicate with the rest outside of that dream That seems like the type of limitation you'd want to deal with... maybe that's what the dream merging is about? Still this raises a lot more questions about how these Nightmare's operate.
AKA where whatever influence the nightmare has on the waking world will be strongest and most concentrated. And the most likely to arouse suspicion and notice if by some bizarre reasoning they don't know already. So, second to last on her. Wait.. what if RD is in her house? Or just napping on a cloud? Wow, that is going to be fun for him to deal with.
Isolated, solitary, good option for a next save. Assuming Angel doesn't just get tired of waiting for food and MAKE her wake up. Screw the magical spell, bunny wants his noms and he is going to GET them!
...............
Do I need to say it?
Well, Pinkie will be the hardest to find, RD the hardest to get to most likely. Fluttershy you know where, but she's the furthest of the four. And AJ you have a general idea of where she is. So with that chapter title, either AJ or Fluttershy would make sense, and so would them being the next target. Quick run towards SAA to see if he finds AJ, if not head over to Fluttershy's? Or are they on different sides of the town? Also, wait, didn't this all go down in the middle of the night? Though, right night before the Summer Sun Celebration, isn't it tradition for everypony to stay up all night?
I just need to start a Cinemare Sins type counter of times this happens with your stuff.
D'awwwwwwww. And they then spend the rest of the night bugging her about helping them get Dream Warrior Cutie Marks or something like that.
So, can you be bored to sleep by a lecture while in a dream?
1. AJ without a hat one her somewhere? Even with the dress, tyou know she would have a hat stashed somewhere. CHANGELING! Spike! IT'S A TRAP!
2. I thought RD was the one with the distinctive snore.
Well, this IS a nightmare so, likely not an apple in sight.
*Ding*
Good question and, I'm not really sure. Few ideas but, nothing major enough to state. Unless those bulges are somehow related to her family? Trapped in the giant mutated fruits?
Okay the changeling bit was a joke.. and now..... this is getting creepy.
.... Oh right, this is in season 4.
Scootaloo.... don't jinx it!
..... They are going to end up busting into a dream near the end with Club-House-Tron and smacking some giant Nightmare-zilla around, aren't they? That would be so so damn awesome, while being so so damn
. But still, a chance for them to do whatever they want, with no consequences at all... this should be good.
Because that is boring. Now shut up and do something stupidly awesome!
Well first guess is this is obviously about her family, so those would be her parents but, that seems to old even for them. Granny and Grandpa?
*Ding*
Just dream yourself turning into Spikezilla and use them as toothpicks. So, this is getting interesting, and not really sure what is going on or why.
Did it float in the air like a floaty thing?
Yes, this is totally going to end well......
Hmmmm, Sweetie seemed a tad to hard to talk into this. Yeah she's normally the Crusader least likely to get caught up in this stuff and point out how it's a bad idea, but she still goes along with them.
The door as above the door? This really is some M.C. Escher shit going on isn't it?
And while your at it Scoots, why don't you try to avoid a killer by running into the room with no other exit and trying to hide in a closet rather then run outside?
Good question, but definitely something Luna should probably see. Likely something dealing with how they merged the dreams together.
She touched the thing and either get zapped awake, or zapped into another dream.. or even The Nightmare's HQ didn't she?
wait, why would Scootaloo NOW be all "WE MUST CALL LUNA! out of nowhere, while being the one against doing this, even with her knowing about this before?
Oh... Either this dream got really REALLY freaky, or that was supposed to be Sweetie Belle doing that.
Either way, good call.
Okay, that was surprisingly easy.... To easy.....
Saw that coming. So, trap everypony in one massive shared nightmare?
Fair enough.
Huh? How is Twilight of all ponies responsible for him not focusing? the pony that has some uber-OCD levels of focus when she wants to? Or is it as a result of that, and Spike trying to over compensate and not become like that?
Luna, it's the CMC. You could leave them in a padded room with no way in or out, and they would still find some way to cause a disaster.
...... Huh...... that... makes a lot of sense. Leftover fear from foalhood about something bad happening.. exactly the type of thing that would get pulled to the surface..... nice job story, really nice job. Not some overly complex pseudo-philosophic allegory for some past trauma and fear, or something out of nowhere... yeah, very impressive, I really like that.
1. Also impressive.
2. Damnit Big Mac! But, that does fit with him so, nice job on that too.
How hard was it not to use quesadillas instead of tacos?
This.. feels better. Sweetie having far more reason to stand up to Scoots and just make her wait.
AKA, she touched the damn thing. *Ding*
Also, that is rather cool, but makes it even weirder the Nightmares don't know what is going on yet.
Good save there Luna. She definitely knows these fillies far to well.
Wait, how is he able to call her if she hadn't popped into AJ's dream to give him another call button?
Probably to late on that count.
Good news, he found the Alpha.
Bad news, he found the Alpha
*Ding*
Well..... didn't see that coming. Yeah, this is going to be fun.
The button that he shouldn't have.. I mean you COULD say Luna popped in off screen, if not for her thinking about how Spike might do this without her needing to pop in to help him........
Ya think?
Overall, pretty good. Really liked AJ's dream. Not the usual dead parents or losing the farm nightmare you'd expect. But one that still worked and made sense for why she'd have it. Really really damn good one on that.
The CMC plot was fun, was starting wonder why the story was wasting time on them, but payed off big time. Few continuity flubs, but more minor goofs then anything. Plus more and more build up for how this is a lot bigger then even Luna thought and things are just getting started so, yeah great chapter, hope you can get the next one out soon and break through the block.
6438360 I don't have time to respond to that whole thing, but I will point out two things:
1. The whole "coping mechanism thing" was covered in the chapter with Rarity's dream.
2. There's an in-universe reason why the Nightmare that interacted with Spike hasn't sounded the alarm yet, but it would be a spoiler to explain exactly why at this point in the story.
Somehow, I never bookmarked this story and I forgot about it for a while. I was so excited when I somehow stumbled across it again and there were two new chapters! I like this story a lot it is the most interesting Spike centered fan fiction I've read and I hope it is continued.